IONITCH

I

WHEN visitors to the provincial town S---- complained of the dreariness

and monotony of life, the inhabitants of the town, as though defending

themselves, declared that it was very nice in S----, that there was a

library, a theatre, a club; that they had balls; and, finally, that

there were clever, agreeable, and interesting families with whom one

could make acquaintance. And they used to point to the family of the

Turkins as the most highly cultivated and talented.

This family lived in their own house in the principal street, near the

Governor's. Ivan Petrovitch Turkin himself--a stout, handsome, dark man

with whiskers--used to get up amateur performances for benevolent

objects, and used to take the part of an elderly general and cough very

amusingly. He knew a number of anecdotes, charades, proverbs, and was

fond of being humorous and witty, and he always wore an expression from

which it was impossible to tell whether he were joking or in earnest.

His wife, Vera Iosifovna--a thin, nice-looking lady who wore a

pince-nez--used to write novels and stories, and was very fond of

reading them aloud to her visitors. The daughter, Ekaterina Ivanovna, a

young girl, used to play on the piano. In short, every member of the

family had a special talent. The Turkins welcomed visitors, and

good-humouredly displayed their talents with genuine simplicity. Their

stone house was roomy and cool in summer; half of the windows looked

into a shady old garden, where nightingales used to sing in the spring.

When there were visitors in the house, there was a clatter of knives in

the kitchen and a smell of fried onions in the yard--and that was always

a sure sign of a plentiful and savoury supper to follow.

And as soon as Dmitri Ionitch Startsev was appointed the district

doctor, and took up his abode at Dyalizh, six miles from S----, he, too,

was told that as a cultivated man it was essential for him to make the

acquaintance of the Turkins. In the winter he was introduced to Ivan

Petrovitch in the street; they talked about the weather, about the

theatre, about the cholera; an invitation followed. On a holiday in the

spring--it was Ascension Day--after seeing his patients, Startsev set

off for town in search of a little recreation and to make some

purchases. He walked in a leisurely way (he had not yet set up his

carriage), humming all the time:

"'Before I'd drunk the tears from life's goblet....'"

In town he dined, went for a walk in the gardens, then Ivan

Petrovitch's invitation came into his mind, as it were of itself,

and he decided to call on the Turkins and see what sort of people

they were.

"How do you do, if you please?" said Ivan Petrovitch, meeting him

on the steps. "Delighted, delighted to see such an agreeable visitor.

Come along; I will introduce you to my better half. I tell him,

Verotchka," he went on, as he presented the doctor to his wife--"I

tell him that he has no human right to sit at home in a hospital;

he ought to devote his leisure to society. Oughtn't he, darling?"

"Sit here," said Vera Iosifovna, making her visitor sit down beside

her. "You can dance attendance on me. My husband is jealous--he

is an Othello; but we will try and behave so well that he will

notice nothing."

"Ah, you spoilt chicken!" Ivan Petrovitch muttered tenderly, and

he kissed her on the forehead. "You have come just in the nick of

time," he said, addressing the doctor again. "My better half has

written a 'hugeous' novel, and she is going to read it aloud to-day."

"Petit Jean," said Vera Iosifovna to her husband, "dites que l'on

nous donne du thé."

Startsev was introduced to Ekaterina Ivanovna, a girl of eighteen,

very much like her mother, thin and pretty. Her expression was still

childish and her figure was soft and slim; and her developed girlish

bosom, healthy and beautiful, was suggestive of spring, real spring.

Then they drank tea with jam, honey, and sweetmeats, and with very

nice cakes, which melted in the mouth. As the evening came on, other

visitors gradually arrived, and Ivan Petrovitch fixed his laughing

eyes on each of them and said:

"How do you do, if you please?"

Then they all sat down in the drawing-room with very serious faces,

and Vera Iosifovna read her novel. It began like this: "The frost

was intense...." The windows were wide open; from the kitchen

came the clatter of knives and the smell of fried onions.... It

was comfortable in the soft deep arm-chair; the lights had such a

friendly twinkle in the twilight of the drawing-room, and at the

moment on a summer evening when sounds of voices and laughter floated

in from the street and whiffs of lilac from the yard, it was difficult

to grasp that the frost was intense, and that the setting sun was

lighting with its chilly rays a solitary wayfarer on the snowy

plain. Vera Iosifovna read how a beautiful young countess founded

a school, a hospital, a library, in her village, and fell in love

with a wandering artist; she read of what never happens in real

life, and yet it was pleasant to listen--it was comfortable, and

such agreeable, serene thoughts kept coming into the mind, one had

no desire to get up.

"Not badsome ..." Ivan Petrovitch said softly.

And one of the visitors hearing, with his thoughts far away, said

hardly audibly:

"Yes ... truly...."

One hour passed, another. In the town gardens close by a band was

playing and a chorus was singing. When Vera Iosifovna shut her

manuscript book, the company was silent for five minutes, listening

to "Lutchina" being sung by the chorus, and the song gave what was

not in the novel and is in real life.

"Do you publish your stories in magazines?" Startsev asked Vera

Iosifovna.

"No," she answered. "I never publish. I write it and put it away

in my cupboard. Why publish?" she explained. "We have enough to

live on."

And for some reason every one sighed.

"And now, Kitten, you play something," Ivan Petrovitch said to his

daughter.

The lid of the piano was raised and the music lying ready was opened.

Ekaterina Ivanovna sat down and banged on the piano with both hands,

and then banged again with all her might, and then again and again;

her shoulders and bosom shook. She obstinately banged on the same

notes, and it sounded as if she would not leave off until she had

hammered the keys into the piano. The drawing-room was filled with

the din; everything was resounding; the floor, the ceiling, the

furniture.... Ekaterina Ivanovna was playing a difficult passage,

interesting simply on account of its difficulty, long and monotonous,

and Startsev, listening, pictured stones dropping down a steep hill

and going on dropping, and he wished they would leave off dropping;

and at the same time Ekaterina Ivanovna, rosy from the violent

exercise, strong and vigorous, with a lock of hair falling over her

forehead, attracted him very much. After the winter spent at Dyalizh

among patients and peasants, to sit in a drawing-room, to watch

this young, elegant, and, in all probability, pure creature, and

to listen to these noisy, tedious but still cultured sounds, was

so pleasant, so novel....

"Well, Kitten, you have played as never before," said Ivan Petrovitch,

with tears in his eyes, when his daughter had finished and stood

up. "Die, Denis; you won't write anything better."

All flocked round her, congratulated her, expressed astonishment,

declared that it was long since they had heard such music, and she

listened in silence with a faint smile, and her whole figure was

expressive of triumph.

"Splendid, superb!"

"Splendid," said Startsev, too, carried away by the general enthusiasm.

"Where have you studied?" he asked Ekaterina Ivanovna. "At the

Conservatoire?"

"No, I am only preparing for the Conservatoire, and till now have

been working with Madame Zavlovsky."

"Have you finished at the high school here?"

"Oh, no," Vera Iosifovna answered for her, "We have teachers for

her at home; there might be bad influences at the high school or a

boarding school, you know. While a young girl is growing up, she

ought to be under no influence but her mother's."

"All the same, I'm going to the Conservatoire," said Ekaterina

Ivanovna.

"No. Kitten loves her mamma. Kitten won't grieve papa and mamma."

"No, I'm going, I'm going," said Ekaterina Ivanovna, with playful

caprice and stamping her foot.

And at supper it was Ivan Petrovitch who displayed his talents.

Laughing only with his eyes, he told anecdotes, made epigrams, asked

ridiculous riddles and answered them himself, talking the whole

time in his extraordinary language, evolved in the course of prolonged

practice in witticism and evidently now become a habit: "Badsome,"

"Hugeous," "Thank you most dumbly," and so on.

But that was not all. When the guests, replete and satisfied, trooped

into the hall, looking for their coats and sticks, there bustled

about them the footman Pavlusha, or, as he was called in the family,

Pava--a lad of fourteen with shaven head and chubby cheeks.

"Come, Pava, perform!" Ivan Petrovitch said to him.

Pava struck an attitude, flung up his arm, and said in a tragic

tone: "Unhappy woman, die!"

And every one roared with laughter.

"It's entertaining," thought Startsev, as he went out into the

street.

He went to a restaurant and drank some beer, then set off to walk

home to Dyalizh; he walked all the way singing:

"'Thy voice to me so languid and caressing....'"

On going to bed, he felt not the slightest fatigue after the six miles'

walk. On the contrary, he felt as though he could with pleasure have

walked another twenty.

"Not badsome," he thought, and laughed as he fell asleep.

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