III

Also the story finds Colonel Musgrave in the company of his sister on a

warm April day, whilst these two sat upon the porch of the Musgrave home

in Lichfield, and Colonel Musgrave waited until it should be time to

open the Library for the afternoon. And about them birds twittered

cheerily, and the formal garden flourished as gardens thrive nowhere

except in Lichfield, and overhead the sky was a turkis-blue, save for a

few irrelevant clouds which dappled it here and there like splashes of

whipped cream.

Yet, for all this, the colonel was ill-at-ease; and care was on his

brow, and venom in his speech.

"And one thing," Colonel Musgrave concluded, with decision, "I wish

distinctly understood, and that is, if she insists on having young men

loafing about her--as, of course, she will--she will have to entertain

them in the garden. I won't have them in the house, Agatha. You remember

that Langham girl you had here last Easter?" he added, disconsolately

--"the one who positively littered up the house with young men,

and sang idiotic jingles to them at all hours of the night about

the Bailey family and the correct way to spell chicken? She drove me to

the verge of insanity, and I haven't a doubt that this Patricia person

will be quite as obstreperous. So, please mention it to her,

Agatha--casually, of course--that, in Lichfield, when one is partial to

either vocal exercise or amorous daliance, the proper scene of action is

the garden. I really cannot be annoyed by her."

"But, Rudolph," his sister protested, "you forget she is engaged to the

Earl of Pevensey. An engaged girl naturally wouldn't care about meeting

any young men."

"H'm!" said the colonel, drily.

Ensued a pause, during which the colonel lighted yet another cigarette.

Then, "I have frequently observed," he spoke, in absent wise, "that all

young women having that peculiarly vacuous expression about the eyes--I

believe there are misguided persons who describe such eyes as being

'dreamy,'--are invariably possessed of a fickle, unstable and coquettish

temperament. Oh, no! You may depend upon it, Agatha, the fact that she

contemplates purchasing the right to support a peculiarly disreputable

member of the British peerage will not hinder her in the least from

making advances to all the young men in the neighborhood."

Miss Musgrave was somewhat ruffled. She was a homely little woman with

nothing of the ordinary Musgrave comeliness. Candor even compels the

statement that in her pudgy swarthy face there was a droll suggestion

of the pug-dog.

"I am sure," Miss Musgrave remonstrated, with placid dignity, "that you

know nothing whatever about her, and that the reports about the earl

have probably been greatly exaggerated, and that her picture shows her

to be an unusually attractive girl. Though it is true," Miss Musgrave

conceded after reflection, "that there are any number of persons in the

House of Lords that I wouldn't in the least care to have in my own

house, even with the front parlor all in linen as it unfortunately is.

So awkward when you have company! And the Bible does bid us not to put

our trust in princes, and, for my part, I never thought that photographs

could be trusted, either."

"Scorn not the nobly born, Agatha," her brother admonished her, "nor

treat with lofty scorn the well-connected. The very best people are

sometimes respectable. And yet," he pursued, with a slight hiatus of

thought, "I should not describe her as precisely an attractive-looking

girl. She seems to have a lot of hair,--if it is all her own, which it

probably isn't,--and her nose is apparently straight enough, and I

gather she is not absolutely deformed anywhere; but that is all I can

conscientiously say in her favor. She is artificial. Her hair, now! It

has a--well, you would not call it exactly a crinkle or precisely a

wave, but rather somewhere between the two. Yes, I think I should

describe it as a ripple. I fancy it must be rather like the reflection

of a sunset in--a duck-pond, say, with a faint wind ruffling the water.

For I gather that her hair is of some light shade,--induced, I haven't a

doubt, by the liberal use of peroxides. And this ripple, too, Agatha, it

stands to reason, must be the result of coercing nature, for I have

never seen it in any other woman's hair. Moreover," Colonel Musgrave

continued, warming somewhat to his subject, "there is a dimple--on the

right side of her mouth, immediately above it,--which speaks of the most

frivolous tendencies. I dare say it comes and goes when she

talks,--winks at you, so to speak, in a manner that must be simply

idiotic. That foolish little cleft in her chin, too--"

But at this point, his sister interrupted him.

"I hadn't a notion," said she, "that you had even looked at the

photograph. And you seem to have it quite by heart, Rudolph,--and some

people admire dimples, you know, and, at any rate, her mother had red

hair, so Patricia isn't really responsible. I decided that it would be

foolish to use the best mats to-night. We can save them for Sunday

supper, because I am only going to have eggs and a little cold meat, and

not make company of her."

For no apparent reason, Rudolph Musgrave flushed.

"I inspected it--quite casually--last night. Please don't be absurd,

Agatha! If we were threatened with any other direful visitation

--influenza, say, or the seventeen-year locust,--I should

naturally read up on the subject in order to know what to expect. And

since Providence has seen fit to send us a visitor rather than a

visitation--though, personally, I should infinitely prefer the

influenza, as interfering in less degree with my comfort,--I have, of

course, neglected no opportunity of finding out what we may reasonably

look forward to. I fear the worst, Agatha. For I repeat, the girl's face

is, to me, absolutely unattractive!"

The colonel spoke with emphasis, and flung away his cigarette, and took

up his hat to go.

And then, "I suppose," said Miss Musgrave, absently, "you will be

falling in love with her, just as you did with Anne Charteris and Aline

Van Orden and all those other minxes. I _would_ like to see you married,

Rudolph, only I couldn't stand your having a wife."

"I! I!" sputtered the colonel. "I think you must be out of your head! I

fall in love with that chit! Good Lord, Agatha, you are positively

idiotic!"

And the colonel turned on his heel, and walked stiffly through the

garden. But, when half-way down the path, he wheeled about and came

back.

"I beg your pardon, Agatha," he said, contritely, "it was not my

intention to be discourteous. But somehow--somehow, dear, I don't quite

see the necessity for my falling in love with anybody, so long as I have

you."

And Miss Musgrave, you may be sure, forgave him promptly; and

afterward--with a bit of pride and an infinity of love in her kind,

homely face,--her eyes followed him out of the garden on his way to open

the Library. And she decided in her heart that she had the dearest and

best and handsomest brother in the universe, and that she must remember

to tell him, accidentally, how becoming his new hat was. And then, at

some unspoken thought, she smiled, wistfully.

"She would be a very lucky girl if he did," said Miss Musgrave, apropos

of nothing in particular; and tossed her grizzly head.

"An earl, indeed!" said Miss Musgrave

The Rivet in Grandfather's Neck: A Comedy of Limitations · 第 20 / 88 题