'Jeeves,' I said, 'listen attentively. I don't want to give the
impression that I consider myself one of those deadly coves who
exercise an irresistible fascination over one and all and can't meet
a girl without wrecking her peace of mind in the first half-minute.
As a matter of fact, it's rather the other way with me, for girls on
entering my presence are mostly inclined to give me the raised eyebrow
and the twitching upper lip. Nobody, therefore, can say that I am a man
who's likely to take alarm unnecessarily. You admit that, don't you?'
'Yes, sir.'
'Nevertheless, Jeeves, it is a known scientific fact that there is a
particular style of female that does seem strangely attracted to the
sort of fellow I am.'
'Very true, sir.'
'I mean to say, I know perfectly well that I've got, roughly speaking,
half the amount of brain a normal bloke ought to possess. And when a
girl comes along who has about twice the regular allowance, she too
often makes a bee line for me with the love-light in her eyes. I don't
know how to account for it, but it is so.'
'It may be Nature's provision for maintaining the balance of the
species, sir.'
'Very possibly. Anyway, it has happened to me over and over again. It
was what happened in the case of Honoria Glossop. She was notoriously
one of the brainiest women of her year at Girton, and she just gathered
me in like a bull pup swallowing a piece of steak.'
'Miss Pringle, I am informed, sir, was an even more brilliant scholar
than Miss Glossop.'
'Well, there you are! Jeeves, she looks at me.'
'Yes, sir?'
'I keep meeting her on the stairs and in passages.'
'Indeed, sir?'
'She recommends me books to read, to improve my mind.'
'Highly suggestive, sir.'
'And at breakfast this morning, when I was eating a sausage, she
told me I shouldn't, as modern medical science held that a four-inch
sausage contained as many germs as a dead rat. The maternal touch, you
understand; fussing over my health.'
'I think we may regard that, sir, as practically conclusive.'