Canada has evolved a novelty described as a "new beef animal," which
is a blend of the domestic cow and the North American bison. The
resulting prodigy has the ferocious hump and shoulders of the bison,
with the mildly benevolent face of the Herefordshire ox. It must
not, however, be supposed that the old country is behind-hand in such
experiments, as witness the following:--
Billingsgate salesmen have lately been supplied with advance copies
of the new Codoyster fish. This epicurean triumph, which owes its
existence to the research of several eminent specialists, is the
result of a blend of the North Sea cod and the finest Whitstable
native. The result is said to reproduce in a remarkable degree the
succulent qualities of the original fish when eaten with oyster sauce,
and caterers are sure to welcome the combination of these popular
items in so handy a form.
Several fine examples of the Soho chicken have lately appeared upon
the show benches at various important poultry contests. This ingenious
creation, which has long been familiar to the patrons of our less
expensive restaurants (hence the name), is said to possess qualities
of endurance superior to anything previously on the market. Its
muscular development is phenomenal, while the entire elimination of
the liver, and the substitution of four extra drum-sticks for the
ordinary wings and thighs, are noteworthy characteristics.
Success in another branch of the same endeavour is shown in the latest
report of the Society for the Prolongation of Dachshunds. According
to this the worm-ideal seems at last to be in sight, careful
inter-breeding having now produced a variety called the Processional,
selected specimens of which take from one to two minutes in passing
any given spot. The almost entire disappearance of legs is another
attractive feature.
Meanwhile Major-Gen. Threebottle writes from Oporto Lodge, Ealing,
strongly protesting against any further complication of the fauna of
these islands, and pointing out that the simple snakes and cats of our
youth were already sufficiently formidable to a nervous invalid like
himself without the addition of such objectionable novelties.
* * * * *
"Without warning, while the car was travelling at about
fifteen miles per hour, the tyre of the front wheel
burst."--_Scotsman_.
Our tyres are much better trained, and each of the four gives a
distinctive cough before bursting.
* * * * *
"WAREHOUSEMAN (jun.), clothing dept., large
corporation."--_Advt. in_ "_Glasgow Herald_."
He should show off the new line in check waistcoats to the best
advantage.
* * * * *