CHAPTER XII.

TWO MOTHERS.

BUT Mr. Shafto found it no easy task to shake off the chains of

idleness and selfishness which he had allowed himself to be bound by

so many years. One effort and one day's labour did not set him free;

the habits of his life were too strong for that. Besides, he had no

real business to turn to. He had taken up with the undertaker's trade

out of sheer idleness; and since the grave-yard had been closed, and

no funerals permitted in it, all his chance of employment in that way

had gone. This he had not cared about, so long as his wife's industry

had supplied him with his own comforts. The little house they lived in

belonged to turn having come to him from his grandfather, the minister,

whose smoky tablet still remained on the chapel wall. It was not much,

he had often said in his heart, for his wife to earn the mere food and

clothing.

So now there was positively no work he could do. He sauntered about

looking for Gip a little; but there was no hope of success to encourage

him. After he had been to a few police-stations and workhouses with

Sandy, it seemed nothing but a waste of time to go on strolling about

the streets enquiring after a child who had been lost so long. Even

Sandy began to feel this, though he could not bring himself to give up

the hope of finding her somewhere and somehow. Whenever he caught sight

of a tiny ragged girl, or heard the voice of a little child, he could

not help looking and listening if it were not his little Gip. But he

had not much more time for the search; for Mr. Shafto found regular

work for Sandy, though he could find none for himself.

This was in a wood-yard, where a number of poor friendless boys were

employed in chopping wood, and tying them into bundles of chips for

lighting fires. It belonged to Mr. Mason, the young gentleman whom

Sandy had heard preaching that Sunday he first met with John Shafto.

Fortunately for him, there was a vacant place which Mr. Mason could

put him into at once. So there he was, in regular work, with small but

regular wages; a night-school which he was expected to attend; and the

prospect of soon gaining enough to live upon in more comfort than he

had ever known.

"If it weren't for little Gip," said Sandy to John Shafto, "I'd be as

happy as a king. I can't b'lieve it's me at times. But there's little

Gip; she's never out of my head. I'm afeard she'll grow out of my

knowledge if I don't come across her soon. It come over me sometimes,

s'pose I never see her again for years and years, till she's growed up,

and then I don't know as it is Gip? That scares me so I'm ready to run

away from the wood-yard, and never leave off going about the streets

till I find her. She can't grow out of His knowledge, though, can she?"

"Whose?" asked John Shafto.

"Him! Lord Jesus, as is lookin' for her as well as we. He'll be sure to

know her, won't He? I only wish I could see Him just for once, to tell

Him all about her. I'd like so to see how He looks, when He hears me

tell of her. It's so drefful hard to shut my eyes, and speak to nothink

like, when I talk of little Gip. If I could only look in His face, and

hear Him say, 'Never you fear, Sandy, I'll find her, and keep her safe

for you,' just for once, you know, I'd be content."

"But He is doing that," answered John Shafto; "wherever little Gip

is, He's taking care of her for you, and will let you have her again

some day. We can never, never see His face here; but I shall see it

by-and-by, and perhaps tell Him about Gip myself."

"You'll have to die to do that," said Sandy, very gravely. To think

that John would tell the Lord Jesus Christ about little Gip was a great

comfort to him; but he could not bear to think he must lose him himself.

"Yes," said John; "but if it wasn't for mother, I shouldn't mind that.

I've always been used to think of it, ever since we used to play about

the graves, and learn our letters on the tombstones, me and the other

children who are dead. At nights when I sit up in bed, I can see the

graves through my window. I'm not afraid at all of those things, Sandy;

and now you're come, you must take my place, and grow up and be a good

son to poor mother."

"And when I find little Gip, she'll be her little gel," answered Sandy,

eagerly. "I don't believe as mother 'ill ever turn up again now, do

you? I couldn't be the son of two mothers."

That was Sandy's secret dread, which haunted him day by day as he went

to and fro about his work. He was always fearing lest his mother's hand

should seize him by the collar, and hold him fast whilst she searched

his pocket for halfpence; or that she would strip him of his decent

working jacket, and pawn it at the nearest shop. He was sure she would

dog him to his new home, and molest his friends there, till they would

be compelled to give him up to her, and he would be driven back into

the old wretchedness and degradation. It was a great terror, constantly

besetting him; and whenever he had to pass the swinging doors of the

gin-palace, which were not far between in the streets he had to walk

along, he would dart by quickly, as if it were the den of some ravenous

beast of prey, lying in wait to devour him.

"Lord," he said often in his prayers, "let mother be lost always, and

never be found again; but please find little Gip for me soon."

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Lost Gip · 第 12 / 19 章