CHAPTER XIII

IT was a cold, damp day in the middle of February. Paris had for the

moment borrowed a fog from her neighbour across the Channel; and

habituated as she is to sunlight and clear air, she looked dirtier and

far less comfortable than consistently and imperturbably grimy London.

“It is the kind of day,” said Romain D’Ucelles, looking out of the

window, “in which one might as well do one’s duty; anything else

would be equally unpleasant. My angel,” he added to his wife over his

shoulder, “do you require the motor this morning?”

“Yes,” said Madame D’Ucelles, without looking up from her

correspondence.

“But I am desolated,” said Romain, “because I shall have to deprive

you. I am about to go out in it myself.”

“In that case,” said Madame, “you might have spared me your offer!”

“I don’t think it was exactly an offer,” said Romain, with a

thoughtful smile. “I merely wished to show you a little graceful

consideration. You should, of course, have said that you did not want

the motor, and then you might always have believed in the consistency

of my good intentions. But alas! you have acquired that fatal habit of

saying the wrong thing! It is a habit that goes with economy and all

the domestic virtues. It explains much, and you will forgive me I know,

my dear Marie, if I say that I think it excuses more!”

“I don’t know what you mean,” said his wife coldly, “but the bills you

have been running up lately are simply disgraceful. Here are three

from the florist’s. I don’t ask where you send these flowers, but the

account comes to more than a thousand francs!”

“Dear, dear!” said Romain, humming a tune. “Do you not remember, my

life, that I bought you some on the anniversary of our wedding? That

was an expensive affair, I grant you!”

Marie shot a glance of rage at her husband; she would have liked it

to be hatred, and she often thought it was; but he had too charming a

smile.

“The expense of that affair,” she said bitterly, “was altogether my

own!”

“Do not let us quarrel, my adorable one,” murmured Romain, who by now

had reached the door. “It sounds as if we were on our honeymoon. But

there is, you know, after all, more than one way of being expensive!”

“There you speak truly,” said Madame, “and you have shown me them all!”

Romain laughed out at this sally, and under cover of his laughter

brought off his retreat. He enjoyed an occasional conversation with

his wife; he said that it added so to the charm of the conversation of

other women.

It was three weeks since he had received Miss Prenderghast’s letter

imploring him to do his duty about Jean. He had been extremely amused

and a trifle annoyed by it; during the three weeks the annoyance had

worn off, and now only the amusement was left. He rang for the motor

and drove at once to Jean’s new address.

Margot opened the door to him. She was quite overwhelmed by the

gorgeous person in the fur-lined overcoat who asked for Jean. This was

the first of Jean’s friends who had called upon him, except his fellow

artists, and Margot had not a high opinion of artists.

Romain looked at her with amused eyes under his heavy eyelids. “So this

was the successor of Liane de Brances!” he thought. “Pretty, decidedly,

but not worth six flights of stairs.”

Aloud he said he was shocked at having given her so much trouble; he

should suppose from the loud sounds over the way that his nephew was

practising his new and rather noisy career?

“Yes, I think he is,” said Margot flushing delicately.

Romain gave her a charming confidential smile. “My dear child,”

he said,--“you will allow me this familiarity, for I feel that we

already know each other through Jean--do not, I beg of you, encourage

this career! Oh, yes! You see I know your influence is great. It is

delightful for my nephew to be here, and your room--well! one can see

you have a taste. But you want to do what is best for him, do you not?”

“Oh, yes, yes!” said Margot, with a quick catch in her breath. “Only

indeed you mistake; I have no influence, none at all!”

“Come, come!” said Romain, laughing. “Do you want me to believe my

nephew a perfect fool? I grant you this piano-playing is an absurdity,

but if that is his only attraction here, I must give him up altogether.

I assure you, you under rate his judgment! I could prove to you very

speedily, Mademoiselle, that such judgment as that does not run in

our family, but I greatly fear I must leave pleasure for duty, and go

in to my nephew. I can count on you, though, can I not, to support my

plans for him? They don’t exclude, I assure you, his having charming

friendships!”

Margot blushed very deeply and her eyes fell before the laughter in

Romain’s. She felt as if a clear, hard light had fallen upon a little

shining secret of her own, a secret that lived best in the dark, and

which she herself had turned her eyes away from, lest they should see

that which desired to escape.

Of course she would do whatever Jean’s uncle thought best for Jean; and

naturally a future which promised fur-lined overcoats and a motor would

be best for Jean, but they couldn’t, poor Margot knew, be reconciled

with singing lessons on the _sixième étage_, so that her heart sank a

little as she knocked for admittance on Jean’s door.

Jean had given up expecting his uncle, and he was not particularly

pleased to see him. There was something in the contrast between

Romain’s air of finished ease and prosperity and Jean’s poor little

room and inexpensive appearance which made Jean feel rather ridiculous.

One might be superior to Romain and disagree fundamentally with his

sense of the values of life, but there was something about his bright,

amused incredulity in the presence of a higher standard which was apt

to make the higher standard look a trifle flat.

Romain sat down carefully in Jean’s only armchair, and regarded his

nephew, who clung to his music-stool as if it was a banner, with

tolerant amusement.

“My poor boy,” he began, “all this is very sad, isn’t it? Shall we

smoke?”

Jean felt a renewed pang as his uncle drew out his gold monogrammed

cigarette-case and passed it to him. He was determined to resist

Romain to the death, but he wished he had not to resist him to the

point of being laughed at!

“I’ve seen the little girl,” Romain continued, leaning back as

luxuriously as he could and letting his eyes wander over the embroidery

mats, the religious pictures, and all Margot’s ambitious attempts at

embellishments. “She’s charming, my dear boy, charming! The upper lip

is too long, the figure a little too straight, I should imagine that

after forty she might have to take precautions against a moustache;

but where there is freshness and bloom it does not do to look too

critically into these things. Yes, on the whole, I congratulate you!”

“I don’t know what you mean, _mon oncle_,” said Jean impatiently.

“There is nothing to congratulate me upon, I assure you! If you suppose

that Mademoiselle Selba----”

Romain waved his hand gently in the air and half closed his eyes.

“Ah, yes, yes!” he said. “Of course, you take the proper attitude;

only between ourselves, you know, Jean, a _fille de théâtre_ is one

thing and a _femme du monde_ is quite another; one alters one’s tone

accordingly. But I have come to speak seriously to you. You have made

a fatal mistake. I was really distressed to hear of it. A big folly

has about it something that attracts the eye--the world will forgive

much for the sake of an adventure; but a little folly--an obscure

intrigue with an unknown singer--my dear Jean, it is not a sin, it

is a muddle! When I first heard of your inconceivable good fortune

in a certain quarter, I was delighted, a little amused too at your

precipitate good fortune--the luck of the first throw! but grateful to

the good Liane. ‘_Enfin_,’ I said, ‘this begins his education, he is

at the height of felicity; work below his intelligence and happiness

beyond his means! what farther can a man desire?’ But, my good Jean,

you lack discrimination. This is a very grave fault. Let me implore you

to be careful! I used often to have this very question out with your

father. ‘Let me tell you,’ he used to say, ‘that with me, it is all or

nothing.’ I regretted it, for those who take that tone invariably begin

with all and end with nothing. Violence is a mistake, it destroys the

senses. In pleasure, my dear boy, as in delicate health, a little and

often is the best possible prescription. Now this kind of thing,” said

Romain, fingering a blue bead mat, “this kind of thing is very extreme;

it leads you nowhere.”

“I must protest, Uncle, once and for all,” said Jean firmly, “that I am

not here for my pleasure, and that my connection with Mademoiselle is

wholly innocent. I stay here with her and her mother because it happens

to be the only possible means of carrying on my career; but music is

absolutely the only tie between us.”

“Your career?” said Romain, and he looked at the piano, he looked at

Jean, and he looked at the rain on the window-pane. “If what you tell

me is true,” he added after a significant pause, “it is very much more

regrettable than anything I had supposed. A mistaken passion can be

rectified, but a mistaken virtue is apt to remain upon one’s hands.

Pray do not lose your temper; I take your word for it, of course. It

confirms me in my opinion of innocence. It is a quality which damps the

imagination. It reminds me of a wet day I once spent in the country.

Well, my dear Jean, you have, I take it, innocence and your career and

six flights of stairs to climb daily; pray, does it amuse you, this

combination?”

Jean had prepared himself, or thought he had, for the shafts of his

uncle’s wit, but he was hardly prepared for the unconscionable fit of

laughter in which Romain proceeded to indulge. He felt bitterly exposed

to the crudity of his inexperience. Romain did not dislike his nephew,

but he resented him a little; in the first place, he felt that he ought

to have done more for Jean, and in the second place, he envied him

his youth with that deep resentment of a man who has outlived his own

primary emotions without having found anything to replace them. Jean

blushed hotly, but he managed to keep his temper.

“I don’t know that I expected to be amused,” he said. “Of course, it’s

all ugly enough, and hard enough too, perhaps, but I’m very keen about

my work, Uncle Romain.”

“Yes,” said Romain. “So one gathers, and may one ask, do you live on

that appetite without satisfying any other?”

Jean hesitated. To tell the truth, he hardly knew what he did live on.

He had three pupils beside Margot--a hairdresser’s assistant and two

extremely stupid young women, the daughters of the friend of Margot’s

late father. These lessons appeared to pay for his board, which was

incredibly small, but Margot said that it was really quite as cheap to

feed three people as two.

“I have made a small beginning,” he said, looking down at his boots.

They shone beautifully, almost as beautifully as Romain’s; for the

first time it suddenly flashed into his mind to wonder who had cleaned

them.

“I don’t know that, if I were in your place,” said his uncle

thoughtfully, “I should care to have that little one provide for me.

Perhaps I am hardly the person to point this out to you, but at least I

gave Marie a fair equivalent. One can marry a rich woman--there isn’t

that possibility in your case!”

Jean sprang to his feet as if Romain had shot him--indeed, for the

moment he wished he had; the thought that shook him was an unbearable

agony, it had struck straight at his pride! Margot provide for him?

“_Mon oncle!_” he said, stammering with rage and terror, “you make it

impossible for me to answer you, for there is only one answer I can

give to such a suggestion.”

“One answer, my dear boy?” said Romain coolly. “There are at least

a hundred! However, I assure you I don’t want any of them. It is a

pity to take this tragic note. If my suggestion is not true--all the

better; but let us admit for the moment that it is true, all may

re-arrange itself. I have in my mind a little plan that offers you a

way of escape. I have talked it over with your aunt, and I have at

last won her consent. It was not altogether an easy thing to do, for

I foresaw that it might include a small sum of money to your little

friend here--one must free you from obligations in that quarter! And

your aunt--like the good woman that she is--does not enter readily into

a man’s obligations to other women. However, I pointed out to her that

in the long run you would be in a position to repay her handsomely, and

really, my dear Jean, it only depends on yourself how soon!”

Jean leaned forward eagerly; his uncle’s words gave him a sense of

escape from the shame that was burning at his heart. He could pay

Margot back! And he thought that money could do it!

“You remember that night you dined with us?” Romain continued lightly.

“Your aunt sent you in with a rich American. You were shy then, and I

was afraid you would not be a success with women. It appears, however,

that I was mistaken. Now, this American is very rich and consumed with

a desire to become one of us. I don’t know who her people were; in

America, I take it, there are no people, only parents. Your aunt has

pointed out to the girl that young unmarried women entirely unsupported

by suitable relations do not find an _entrée_ into the best French

houses, and that there is one way, and only one, of her arriving at her

purpose. She must, you perceive, naturally enough, marry one of us. Do

not be startled, my dear Jean, and above all do not be precipitate. I

daresay you wonder what the fair Pauline should see in you. To tell

the truth, I fancy she does not see very much, but you have a certain

value--you are my nephew, you have a good old name, and (for these

Americans are so like children) it appears that your little title is

not indifferent to her, and then there is your aunt. The poor girl

considers your aunt to be the ideal French _grande dame_. They have

such an infallible instinct, these young persons, for breeding and

the right _ton_. I have succeeded in making little histories up about

you. She has become interested; like all people of cold natures and

wooden virtues, she is immensely attracted by what she considers, in

her charming elementary manner, wickedness. Doubtless you will be as

surprised as I am to hear of your poor little affairs called by so

fine a name. Big names and little facts suit _ces gens-là_; they have

no amusements, you know, except their dollars and their religions.

Fortunately for them, perhaps, they have a great many of both.

“Now, my little plan is that you should come and stay with us for a

week or two, and allow us to arrange for you this very suitable match.

If you will agree to this, I will discharge all your obligations, and

there will be no further need to refer to the Bank, nor,” added Romain

with a faint smile, “to the--career! And, my dear boy, you will get the

taste out of your mouth of this very bad furniture! Come! The little

Pauline looks well, and really you need see very little of her! I can

promise you from my own experience that with a little tact and the

discrimination we were talking of just now, one’s wife is the woman of

all others with whom we need have least to do. I myself will see that

suitable settlements are drawn up.”

There were moments during Romain’s speech when Jean hesitated. His

uncle had a way of making ideals seem very silly affairs. Jean hated

marriage, he disliked Pauline, the life before him had in it nothing

that could rivet his heart, and yet so great was his shame and his

sense of moral exhaustion that he listened with a feeling of relief.

Perhaps this was the best way out of his false start; perhaps work and

courage and privation were not worth the sacrifices one made for them;

the flesh that he had thought so little of as a temptation, when he

was leading the higher life, seemed different now--it became, after

all, the respectable thing, as, indeed, it very often is. He was

young enough to despise good food, but Liane had taught him to think

about his clothes, and he already shrank from small rooms and sordid

surroundings; he had learned that poverty is not romantic when it is

uncomfortable; and it is generally uncomfortable. Other men paid the

same price that he would have to pay; it seemed a mean thing to do, but

Pauline wanted his name; it would be an equivalent--she would expect no

more of him; and he? Had he ceased already, then, to expect anything

from himself? Romain watched him with speculative eyes. He hoped very

much Jean would be sensible. He hardly acknowledged to himself that he

would respect Jean less if he was.

It was at this moment that Margot began to sing. She thought Jean’s

fine uncle must be gone by now, and she was longing to go to Jean,

because she had some very good news for him, news which made her spirit

dance and her eyes shine, and the voice that came from her glad little

heart took wings and flew to meet her comrade. He would be sure to hear

her and call out for her to come in.

But Jean did not call her in just yet. Instead he turned a little

brusquely towards Romain. “I am immensely grateful to you, _mon

oncle_,” he said, “but I could not think of accepting your plan for a

moment. I shall get on somehow, you know.” Romain D’Ucelles shrugged

his shoulders and held out his hand, smiling his thin, bored smile.

“Think it over, my dear boy, think it over,” he said. “There is no

hurry, you are the only pretender yet in the field. And as for the

little girl here, you know, why really there’s no particular reason why

you should give that up!”

“There’s one thing I’ll never do!” said Jean to himself, as he watched

his uncle’s head disappearing slowly down the precipitous drop of the

stairs. “Never! Never! Never!”

He did not refer to his marriage with Pauline.

"Broken Music" · 第 13 / 29 章