TELEGRAPHIC BLUNDERS.
Although the work of sending and receiving telegraphic messages may be
regarded in a general way as partaking largely of a merely mechanical
nature, yet it is work to which the operator who is to achieve credit in
his sphere must bring much tact, good sense, intelligence, a knowledge
of the world, and a considerable amount of patience. Not only are the
terms in which telegrams are frequently written so far devoid of context
in themselves, owing to the curt way in which they are worded, as to
render the sense of little assistance in estimating the correctness of a
message received, but the letters of the telegraphic alphabet, being
nothing more than little groups of dots and dashes variously arranged,
are extremely susceptible of mutilation, owing to any lack of exact
spacing on the part of the sending operator. Nor does the liability to
error lie only in these directions. The dots and dashes frequently fail
or run together, owing either to feeble signals, contact of the wires
with one another, with trees, or other objects, or to the instruments
not being in perfect adjustment. A grain of grit or of dust getting
between the points of contact in a delicate instrument will sometimes do
much mischief in the way indicated. There is liability to mistakes, too,
in consequence of the handwriting of the senders, or of the operators
at a transmitting point where messages have to be again taken down, not
being very plain. Yet over and above these tendencies to error, there is
the fallibility of human nature, which will sometimes lead a person to
write "no" where "yes" is intended, or "black" where "white" is meant;
and of such mistakes probably no explanation can be given. So that the
work of a telegraphist is beset with pitfalls, and he requires all his
wits and a fair share of intelligence to keep him right in his work. It
may further be remarked that many errors in telegrams, which might be
supposed by the public to be gross or inexcusable, have occurred in the
most simple way, or have been shown to be due to failures of a very
trifling kind.
The following are illustrations of such mistakes:--
A pleasure-party, telegraphing to some friends, stated that they had
"arrived all right," but the message was rendered, "We have arrived all
tight." The words "right" and "tight" in the Morse code are as
follows:--
r i g h t
. - . . . - - . . . . . -
t i g h t
- . . - - . . . . . -
In another case, a poor person, desiring to state that her daughter was
ill, wrote in her message, "Mary is bad." This was rendered, "Mary is
dead," the sense being changed by a slight imperfection of spacing,
thus--
d e a d
- . . . . - - . .
instead of--
b a d
- . . . . - - . .
In a third case, owing to failing signals, possibly from so simple a
cause as the intermittent contact of the wire with a wet branch of a
tree, or a particle of grit or dust finding its way between the points
of the instrument, the import of the message was altogether changed.
Thus, "Alfred doing well, enjoyed egg to-day," was received, "Alfred
dying, enjoyed GG to-day."
A gentleman telegraphed from London to his brother in the country to
send a hack to meet him at the station; but when the gentleman arrived
at the station he found a _sack_ waiting for him. A firm in London
telegraphed, "_Send rails ten foot lengths_;" but the message was
delivered, "_Send rails in foot lengths_."
A person telegraphed to a friend to "take two stalls at the Haymarket,"
but the message conveyed directions to secure "two stables at the
Haymarket." In another telegram, the intimation, "mother is no worse,"
was changed to "mother is no more." Again, "You will be glad to hear
that your sister has accepted an engagement with your father's
approval," was rendered, "that your sister has accepted an engagement
with your father's apostle." In another case a plain business message,
thus--"Come to me as early as you can, that we may arrange Wednesday,"
was given a matrimonial turn by being delivered as, "that we may arrange
wedding." The next case is one in which a hungry man would doubtless be
made an angry man in consequence of the mistake which occurred. His
message, which was written thus,--"Shall arrive by train to-morrow
_morning_; provide a good _supply_ of bread, butter, eggs, milk, and
potatoes,"--was delivered as "provide a good _supper_ of bread," &c. In
another instance the notice that "Mr ---- will come to-night with me at
7 to tea," was rendered, "Mr ---- will come to-night with me, get 7 to
tea;" the only argument in favour of the mistake being "the more the
merrier." Then, on another occasion, a telegram sent by a person in the
country to "Madame ----, Costumier," at an address in London, conveying
an order for a fancy dress, was presented to the maker of costumes as
"Madame ----, Costermonger." In a telegram directed to "----, M.P.,
House of Commons," the address somehow got changed to "----, M.P., House
of Correction;" but the member not being found there, the clerks at the
delivering office suggested that it should be tried at the "House of
Detention,"--a not unlikely place for successful delivery of such a
message as things were at the time.
It has been left to America to produce a mistake in telegraphing which,
while it is very amusing, could not result in hurt or disappointment to
any one. Here it is, just as received from the other side of the
"ferry":--
A St Louis merchant, while in New York, received a telegram notifying
that his wife was ill. He sent a message to his family doctor asking the
nature of the sickness, and if there was any danger, and promptly
received the answer "_No danger; your wife has had a child; if we can
keep her from having another to-night she will do well._" The
mystification of the agitated husband was not removed until a second
inquiry revealed the fact that his indisposed lady had had a _chill_.