MR. SMITH kept a drug shop in the little village of Q--, which was
situated a few miles from Lancaster. It was his custom to visit the
latter place every week or two, in order to purchase such articles
as were needed from time to time in his business. One day, he drove
off towards Lancaster, in his wagon, in which, among other things,
was a gallon demijohn. On reaching the town, he called first at a
grocer's with the inquiry,
"Have you any common wine?"
"How common?" asked the grocer.
"About a dollar a gallon. I want it for antimonial wine."
"Yes; I have some just fit for that, and not much else, which I will
sell at a dollar."
"Very well. Give me a gallon," said Mr. Smith. The demijohn was
brought in from the wagon and filled. And then Mr. Smith drove off
to attend to other business. Among the things to be done on that
day, was to see a man who lived half a mile from Lancaster. Before
going out on this errand, Mr. Smith stopped at the house of his
particular friend, Mr. Jones. Mr. Jones happened not to be in, but
Mrs. Jones was a pleasant woman, and he chatted with her for ten
minutes, or so. As he stepped into his wagon, it struck him that the
gallon demijohn was a little in his way, and so, lifting it out, he
said to Mrs. Jones,
"I wish you would take care of this until I come back."
"O! certainly," replied Mrs. Jones, "with the greatest pleasure."
And so the demijohn was left in the lady's care.
Some time afterwards Mr. Jones came in, and among the first things
that attracted his attention, was the strange demijohn.
"What is this?" was his natural inquiry.
"Something that Mr. Smith left."
"Mr. Smith from Q--?"
"Yes."
"I wonder what he has here?" said Mr. Jones, taking hold of the
demijohn. "It feels heavy."
The cork was unhesitatingly removed, and the mouth of the vessel
brought in contact with the smelling organ of Mr. Jones.
"Wine, as I live!" fell from his lips. "Bring me a glass."
"O! no, Mr. Jones. I wouldn't touch his wine," said Mrs. Jones.
"Bring me a glass. Do you think I'm going to let a gallon of wine
pass my way without exacting toll? No--no! Bring me a glass."
The glass, a half-pint tumbler, was produced, and nearly filled with
the execrable stuff--as guiltless of grape juice as a dyer's
vat--which was poured down the throat of Mr. Jones.
"Pretty fair wine, that; only a little rough," said Mr. Jones,
smacking his lips.
"It's a shame!" remarked Mrs. Jones, warmly, "for you to do so."
"I only took toll," said the husband, laughing. "No harm in that,
I'm sure."
"Rather heavy toll, it strikes me," replied Mrs. Jones.
Meantime, Mr. Smith, having completed most of his business for that
day, stopped at a store where he wished two or three articles put
up. While these were in preparation he said to the keeper of the
store,
"I wish you would let your lad Tom step over for me to Mr. Jones's.
I left a demijohn of common wine there, which I bought for the
purpose of making it into antimonial wine.
"O! certainly," replied the store-keeper. "Here, Tom!" and he called
for his boy.
Tom came, and the store-keeper said to him,
"Run over to Mr. Jones's and get a jug of antimonial wine which Mr.
Smith left there. Go quickly, for Mr. Smith is in a hurry."
"Yes, sir," replied the lad, and away he ran.
After Mr. Jones had disposed of his half a pint of wine, he thought
his stomach had rather a curious sensation, which is not much to be
wondered at, considering the stuff with which he had burdened it.
"I wonder if that really is wine?" said he, turning from the window
at which he had seated himself, and taking up tie demijohn again.
The cork was removed, and his nose applied to the mouth of the huge
bottle.
"Yes, it's wine; but I'll vow it's not much to brag of." And the
cork was once more replaced.
Just then came a knock at the door. Mrs. Jones opened it, and the
store-keeper's lad appeared.
"Mr. Smith says, please let me have the jug of antimonial wine he
left here."
"Antimonial wine!" exclaimed Mr. Jones, his chin falling, and a
paleness instantly overspread his face.
"Yes, sir," said the lad.
"Antimonial wine!" fell again, but huskily, from the quivering lips
of Mr. Jones. "Send for the doctor, Kitty, quick! Oh! How sick I
feel! Send for the doctor, or I'll be a dead man in half an hour!"
"Antimonial wine! Dreadful!" exclaimed Mrs. Jones, now as pale and
frightened as her husband. "Do you feel sick?"
"O! yes. As sick as death!" And the appearance of Mr. Jones by no
means belied his words. "Send for the doctor instantly, or it may be
too late."
Mrs. Jones ran first in one direction and then in another, and
finally, after telling the boy to run for the doctor, called Jane,
her single domestic, and started her on the same errand.
Off sprung Jane at a speed outstripping that of John Gilpin.
Fortunately, the doctor was in his office, and he came with all the
rapidity a proper regard to the dignity of his profession would
permit, armed with a stomach pump and a dozen antidotes. On arriving
at the house of Mr. Jones he found the sufferer lying upon a bed,
ghastly pale, and retching terribly.
"O! doctor! I'm afraid it's all over with me!" gasped the patient.
"How did it happen? what have you taken?" inquired the doctor,
eagerly.
"I took, by mistake, nearly a pint of antimonial wine."
"Then it must be removed instantly," said the doctor; and down the
sick man's throat went one end of a long, flexible, India rubber
tube, and pump! pump! pump! went the doctor's hand at the other end.
The result was very palpable. About a pint of reddish fluid,
strongly smelling of wine, came up, after which the instrument was
withdrawn.
"There," said the doctor, "I guess that will do. Now let me give you
an antidote." And a nauseous dose of something or other was mixed up
and poured down, to take the place of what had just been removed.
"Do you feel any better now?" inquired the doctor, as he sat holding
the pulse of the sick man, and scanning, with a professional eye,
his pale face, that was covered with a clammy perspiration.
"A little," was the faint reply. "Do you think all danger is past?"
"Yes, I think so. The antidote I have given you will neutralize the
effect of the drug, as far as it has passed into the system."
"I feel as weak as a rag," said the patient. "I am sure I could not
bear my own weight. What a powerful effect it had!"
"Don't think of it," returned the doctor. "Compose yourself. There
is now no danger to be apprehended whatever."
The wild flight of Jane through the street, and the hurried
movements of the doctor, did not fail to attract attention. Inquiry
followed, and it soon became noised about that Mr. Jones had taken
poison.
Mr. Smith was just stepping into his wagon, when a man came up and
said to him,
"Have you heard the news?"
"What news?"
"Mr. Jones has taken poison!"
"What?"
"Poison!"
"Who! Mr. Jones?"
"Yes. And they say he cannot live."
"Dreadful! I must see him." And without waiting for further
information, Mr. Smith spoke to his horse and rode off at a gallop
for the residence of his friend. Mrs. Jones met him at the door,
looking very anxious.
"How is he?" inquired Mr. Smith, in a serious voice.
"A little better, I thank you. The doctor has taken it all out of
his stomach. Will you walk up?"
Mr. Smith ascended to the chamber where lay Mr. Jones, looking as
white as a sheet. The doctor was still by his side.
"Ah! my friend," said the sick man, in a feeble voice, as Mr. Smith
took his hand, "that antimonial wine of yours has nearly been the
death of me."
"What antimonial wine?" inquired Mr. Smith, not understanding his
friend.
"The wine you left here in the gallon demijohn."
"That wasn't antimonial wine!"
"It was not?" fell from the lips of both Mr. and Mrs. Jones.
"Why, no! It was only wine that I had bought for the purpose of
making antimonial wine."
Mr. Jones rose up in bed.
"Not antimonial wine?"
"No!"
"Why the boy said it was."
"Then he didn't know any thing about it. It was nothing but some
common wine which I had bought."
Mr. Jones took a long breath. The doctor arose from the bedside, and
Mr. Jones exclaimed,
"Well, I never!"
Then came a grave silence, in which one looked at the other,
doubtingly.
"Good-day;" said the doctor, and went down stairs.
"So you have been drinking my wine, it seems," laughed Mr. Smith, as
soon as the man with the stomach pump had retired.
"I only took a little toll," said Mr. Jones, back into whose pale
face the color was beginning to come, and through whose almost
paralyzed nerves was again flowing from the brain a healthy
influence. "But don't say any thing about it! Don't for the world!"
"I won't, on one condition," said Mr. Smith, whose words were
scarcely coherent, so strongly was he convulsed with laughter.
"What is that?"
"You must become a teetotaller."
"Can't do that," replied Mr. Jones.
"Give me a day or two to make up my mind."
"Very well. And now, good bye; the sun is nearly down, and it will
be night before I get home."
And Mr. Smith shook hands with Mr. and Mrs. Jones and hurriedly
retired, trying, but in vain, to leave the house in a grave and
dignified manner. Long before Mr. Jones had made up his mind to join
the teetotallers, the story of his taking toll was all over the
town, and for the next two or three months he had his own time of
it. After that, it became an old story.
"THOU ART THE MAN!"
"HOW can you reconcile it to your conscience to continue in your
present business, Mr. Muddler?" asked a venerable clergyman of a
tavern-keeper, as the two walked home from the funeral of a young
man who had died suddenly.
"I find no difficulty on that score," replied the tavern-keeper, in
a confident tone: "My business is as necessary to the public as that
of any other man."
"That branch of it, which regards the comfort and accommodation of
travellers, I will grant to be necessary. But there is another
portion of it which, you must pardon me for saying, is not only
uncalled for by the real wants of the community, but highly
detrimental to health and good morals."
"And pray, Mr. Mildman, to what portion of my business do you
allude?"
"I allude to that part of it which embraces the sale of intoxicating
drinks."
"Indeed! the very best part of my business. But, certainly, you do
not pretend to say that I am to be held accountable for the
unavoidable excesses which sometimes grow out of the use of liquors
as a beverage?"
"I certainly must say, that, in my opinions a very large share of
the responsibility rests upon your shoulders. You not only make it a
business to sell liquors, but you use every device in your power to
induce men to come and drink them. You invent new compounds with new
and attractive names, in order to induce the indifferent or the
lovers of variety, to frequent your bar-room. In this way, you too
often draw the weak into an excess of self-indulgence, that ends,
alas! in drunkenness and final ruin of body and soul. You are not
only responsible for all this, Mr. Muddler, but you bear the weight
of a fearful responsibility!"
"I cannot see the subject in that light, Mr. Mildman," the
tavern-keeper said, rather gravely. "Mine is an honest and
honourable calling, and it is my duty to my family and to society,
to follow it with diligence and a spirit of enterprise."
"May I ask you a plain question, Mr. Muddler?"
"Oh yes, certainly! as many as you please."
"Can that calling be an honest and honourable one which takes
sustenance from the community, and gives back nothing in return?"
"I do not know that I understand the nature of your question, Mr.
Mildman."
"Consider then society as a man in a larger form, as it really is.
In this great body, as in the lesser body of man, there are various
functions of use and a reciprocity between the whole. Each function
receives a portion of life from the others, and gives back its own
proper share for the good of the whole. The hand does not act for
itself alone--receiving strength and selfishly appropriating it
without returning its quota of good to the general system. And so of
the heart, and lungs, and every other organ in the whole body.
Reverse the order--and how soon is the entire system diseased! Now,
does that member of the great body of the people act honestly and
honourably, who regularly receives his portion of good from the
general social system, and gives nothing back in return?"