JIM LONG.
"Trafton?" said Jim Long, more familiarly known as Long Jim, scratching
his head reflectively, "can't remember just how long I _did_ live in
Trafton; good sight longer'n I'll live in it any more, I calklate;
green, oh, dretful green, when I come here; in fact mem'ry hadn't
de-welluped; wasn't peart then like I am now. But I ain't got nothin' to
say agin' Trafton, _I_ ain't, tho' there _be_ some folks as has. Thar's
Kurnel Brookhouse, now, _he's_ bin scalped severial times; then
thar's--hello!"
Jim brought his rhetoric up standing, and lowered one leg hastily off
the fence, where he had been balancing like a Chinese juggler.
At the same moment a fine chestnut horse dashed around a curve of the
road, bearing a woman, who rode with a free rein, and sat as if born to
the saddle. She favored Jim with a friendly nod as she flew past, and
that worthy responded with a delighted grin and no other sign of
recognition.
When she had disappeared among the trees, and the horse's hoofs could
scarcely be heard on the hard dry road, Jim drew up his leg, resumed his
former balance, and went on as if nothing had happened.
"There was Kurnel Brookhouse and--"
"The mischief fly away wid old Brookhouse," broke in Carnes, giving the
fence a shake that nearly unseated our juggler. "Who's the purty girl as
bowed till yee's? That's the question on board now."
"Look here, Mr. Ireland," expostulated Jim, getting slowly off the fence
backward, and affecting great timidity in so doing, "ye shouldn't shake
a chap that way when he's practisin' jimnasti--what's its name? It's
awful unsafe."
[Illustration: "Look here, Mr. Ireland," expostulated Jim, "ye shouldn't
shake a chap that way."--page 59.]
And he assured himself that his two feet were actually on _terra firma_
before he relinquished his hold upon the top rail of the fence. Then
turning toward Carnes he asked, with a most insinuating smile:
"Wasn't you askin' something?"
"That's jist what I was, by the powers," cried Carnes, as if his fate
hung upon the answer. "Who is the leddy? be dacent, now."
We had been some two weeks in Trafton when this dialogue occurred, and
Jim Long was one of our first acquaintances. Carnes had picked him up
somewhere about town; and the two had grown quite friendly and intimate.
Long was a character in the eyes of Carnes, and was gradually
developing into a genius in mine. Jim was, to all outward appearances,
the personification of laziness, candor, good nature, and a species of
blundering waggishness; but as I grew to know him better, I learned to
respect the irony under his innocent looks and boorish speeches, and I
soon found that he possessed a faculty, and a fondness, for baffling and
annoying Carnes, that delighted me; for Carnes was, like most
indefatigible jokers, rather nonplussed at having the tables turned.
Jim never did anything for a livelihood that could be discovered, but he
called himself a "Hoss Fysician," and indeed it was said that he could
always be trusted with a horse, if he could be induced to look at one.
But he had his likes and dislikes, so he said, and he would obstinately
refuse to treat a horse toward which he had what he called "onfriendly
feelin's."
Jim could tell us all there was to tell concerning the town of Trafton.
It was only necessary to set him going; and no story lost anything of
spirit through being told by him.
He was an oracle on the subjects of fishing and hunting; indeed, he was
usually to be found in the companionship of gun or fishing rod.
Fortunately for us, Trafton had rare facilities for sports of the
aforementioned sort, and we gathered up many small items while, in the
society of Long Jim, we scrambled through copses, gun in hand, or
whipped the streams, and listened to the heterogenous mass of
information that flowed from his ready tongue.
But the spirit of gossip was not always present with Jim. Sometimes he
was in an argumentative mood, and then would ensue the most astounding
discussions between himself and Carnes. Sometimes he was full of
theology, and then his discourse would have enraptured Swing, and
out-Heroded Ingersoll, for his theology varied with his moods. Sometimes
he was given to moralizing, and then Carnes was in despair.
Jim lived alone in a little house, or more properly, "cabin," something
more than a mile from town. He had a small piece of ground which he
called his "farm," and all his slight amount of industry was expended on
this.
"Who is the leddy, I tell yee's?" roared Carnes, who, I may as well
state here, had introduced himself to the Traftonites as Barney Cooley.
"Bedad, a body would think she was your first shwateheart by the
dumbness av yee's!"
"And so she air," retorted Jim with much solemnity. "Don't _you_ go ter
presoomin', Mr. Ireland. That are Miss Manvers, as lives in the house
that's just a notch bigger'n Kurnel Brookhouse's; and her father was
Captain Manvers, as went down in the good ship _Amy Audrey_, and left
his darter that big house, and a bigger fortune dug out 'en a
treasure-ship on the coast uv--"
"Stop a bit, long legs," interposed Carnes, or Barney, as we had better
call him, "was it a threasure-ship yee's wur hatchin' when it tuck yee's
so long to shun out yer little sthory?"
"Well, then, Erin, tell your own stories, that's all. If yer wan't ter
kick over one uv the institooshuns uv Trafton, why, wade in."
But Carnes only shook his head, and lying at full length upon the ground
feigning great pain, groaned at intervals:
"Oh! h! h! threasure-ship!"
"But, Long," I interposed, "does this young lady, this Miss Manvers,
sanction the story of a treasure from the deep, or is it only a flying
rumor?"
"It's flyin' enough," retorted Jim, soberly. "It's in everybody's
mouth; that is, everybody as has an appetite for flyin' rumors. And I
never knew of the lady contradictin' it, nuther. The facks is jest
these, boss. There's Miss Manvers, and there's the big house, and the
blooded horses, an' all the other fine things that I couldn't begin to
interduce by their right names. They're facks, as anybody can see. There
seems to be plenty o' money backin' the big house an' other big fixins,
an' _I_ ain't agoin' to be oudacious enough ter say there ain't a big
treasure-ship backin' up the whole business. Now, I ain't never seen
'em, an' I ain't never seen anyone as has, not bein' much of a society
man; but folks _say_ as Miss Manvers has got the most wonderfullest
things dug out o' that ship; old coins, heaps of 'em; jewels an'
_aunteeks_, as they call 'em, that don't hardly ever see daylight. One
thing's certain: old Manvers come here most six years ago; he dressed,
looked, and talked like a sailor; he bought the big house, fitted it up,
an' left his daughter in it. Then he went away and got drowned. They say
he made his fortune at sea, and it's pretty sartin that he brought some
wonderful things home from the briny. Mebbe you had better go up to the
Hill, that's Miss Manvers' place, and interduce yourself, and ask for
the family history, Mr. 'Exile of Erin,'" concluded Jim, with a grin
intended to be sarcastic, as he seated himself on a half decayed stump,
and prepared to fill his pipe.
"Bedad, an' so I will, Long Jim," cried Barney, springing up with
alacrity. "An' thank ye kindly for mintionin' it. When will I find the
leddy at home, then?"
Partly to avert the tournament which I saw was about to break out afresh
between the two, and partly through interest in the fair owner of the
treasure-ship spoils, I interposed once more.
"Miss Manvers must be a fair target for fortune-hunters, Long; are there
any such in Trafton?"
"Wall, now, that's what _some_ folks says, tho' I ain't goin' ter lay
myself liable ter an action fer slander. There's _lovers_ enough; it
ain't easy tellin' jest what they _air_ after. There's young Mr.
Brookhouse; now, _his_ pa's rich enough; _he_ ain't no call to go fortin
huntin'. There's a lawyer from G----, too, and a young 'Piscopal parson;
then there's our new young doctor. I ain't hearn anyone say anythin'
about him; but _I've_ seen 'em together, and I makebold ter say that
he's anuther on 'em. Seen the young doctor, ain't ye?" turning to me
suddenly with the last question.
"Yes," I replied, carelessly; "he dines at the hotel."
"Just so, and keeps his own lodgin' house in that little smit on a
cottage across the creek on the Brookhouse farm road."
"Oh, does he?"
"Yes. Queer place for a doctor, some think, but bless you, it's as
central as any, when you come ter look. Trafton ain't got any _heart_,
like most towns; you can't tell where the middle of it is. It's as
crookid as--its reputation."
Not desiring to appear over anxious concerning the reputation of
Trafton, I continued my queries about the doctor.
"He's new to Trafton, I think you said?"
"Yes, bran new; _too_ new. We don't like new things, we don't; have to
learn 'em afore we like 'em. We don't like the new doctor like we
orter."
"_We_, Long? Don't you like Dr. Bethel?"
"Well, speakin' as an individual, I like him fust rate. _I_ wuz speakin'
as a good citizen, ye see; kind o' identifyin' myself with the common
pulse," with an oratorical flourish.
"Oh, I do see," I responded, laughingly.
"Yis, we see!" broke in Barney, who had bridled his tongue all too long
for his own comfort. "He's runnin' fur office, is Jim; he's afther
wantin' to be alderman."
"Ireland," retorted Long, in a tone of lofty admonition, "we're talkin'
sense, wot nobody expects ye to understand. Hold yer gab, won't yer?"
Thus admonished, Barney relapsed into silence, and Jim, who was now
fairly launched, resumed:
"Firstly," said he, "the doctor's a leetle too good lookin', don't you
think so?"
"Why, he is handsome, certainly, but it's in a massive way; he is not
effeminate enough to be _too_ handsome."
"That's it," replied Long, disparagingly; "he ain't our style. _Our_
style is curled locks, cunnin' little moustachys, little hands and feet,
and slim waists. Our style is more ruffles to the square fut of shirt
front, and more chains and rings than this interlopin' doctor wears."
"Our sthyle! Och, murther, hear him!" groaned Carnes, in a stage aside.
"His manners ain't our style, nuther," went on Long, lugubriously.
"_We_ always has a bow and a smile fur all, rich an poor alike,
exceptin' now and then a no count person what there's no need uv wastin'
politeness on. _He_ goes along head up, independenter nor Fouth o' July.
He don't make no distincshun between folks an' folks, like a man orter.
I've seen him bow jist the same bow to old Granny Sanders, as lives down
at the poor farm, and to Parson Radcliffe, our biggest preachin' gun.
Now, _that's_ no way fer a man ter do as wants ter live happy in
Trafton; it ain't _our_ way."
A mighty groan from Barney.
"He's got a practice, though," went on Jim, utterly ignoring the
apparent misery of his would-be tormentor. "Somehow he manages to cure
folks as some of our old doctors can't. I reckon a change o' physic's
good fer folks, same's a change o' diet--"
"Or a clane shirt," broke in Carnes, with an insinuating glance in the
direction of Jim's rather dingy linen.
"Eggsackly," retorted Long, turning back his cuffs with great care and
glancing menacingly at his enemy--"er a thrashin'."
"Gentlemen," I interposed, "let us have peace. And tell me, Jim, where
may we find your model Traftonite, your hero of the curls, moustaches,
dainty hands, and discriminating politeness? I have not seen him."
"Whar?" retorted Long, in an aggrieved tone, "look here, boss, you don't
think _I_ ever mean anythin' personal by my remarks? I'd sworn it were
all that way when you come ter notice. The average Traftonite's the
sleekest, pertiest chap on earth. We wuz born so."
Some more demonstrations in pantomime from Carnes, and silence fell
upon us. I knew from the way Long smoked at his pipe and glowered at
Carnes that nothing more in the way of information need be expected from
him. He had said enough, or too much, or something he had not intended
to say; he looked dissatisfied, and soon we separated, Long repairing to
his farm, and Carnes and I to our hotel, all in search of dinner.
"We won't have much trouble in finding the 'Average Traftonite,' old
man," I said, as we sauntered back to town.
No answer; Carnes was smoking a huge black pipe and gazing thoughtfully
on the ground.
"I wonder if any attempt has been made to rob Miss Manvers of those
treasure-ship jewels," I ventured next.
"Umph!"
"Or of her blooded horses. Carnes, what's your opinion of Long?"
Carnes took his pipe from his mouth and turned upon me two serious eyes.
When I saw the expression in them I knew he was ready to talk business.
"Honor bright?" he queried, without a trace of his Irish accent.
"Honor bright."
"Well," restoring his pipe and puffing out a black cloud, "he's an odd
fish!"
"Bad?"
"He's a fraud!"
"As how?"
"Cute, keen, has played the fool so long he sometimes believes himself
one. Did you notice any little discrepancies in his speech?
"Well, rather."
"Nobody else ever would, I'll be bound; not the 'Average Traftonite,' at
least. That man has not always been at odds with the English grammar,
mark me. What do you think, Bathurst?"
"I think," responded I, soberly, "that we shall find in him an ally or
an enemy."
We had been sauntering "across lots," over some of the Brookhouse acres,
and we now struck into a path leading down to the highway, that brought
us out just opposite the cottage occupied by Dr. Bethel.
As we approached, the doctor was leaning over the gate in conversation
with a gentleman seated in a light road wagon, whose face was turned
away from us.
As we came near he turned his head, favoring us with a careless glance,
and, as I saw his face, I recognized him as the handsome young gallant
who had attended the friend of Miss Grace Ballou, on the occasion of
that friend's visit to the Ballou farm, and who had bidden the ladies
such an impressive good-bye as I drove them away from the village
station.
Contrary to my first intention I approached the gate, and as I drew
near, the young man gathered up his reins and nodding to the doctor
drove away.
Dr. Bethel and myself had exchanged civilities at our hotel, and I
addressed him in a careless way as I paused at the gate.
"That's a fine stepping horse, doctor," nodding after the receding
turnout; "is it owned in the town?"
"Yes," replied the doctor; "that is young Brookhouse, or rather one of
them. There are two or three sons; they all drive fine stock."
I was passing in the town for a well-to-do city young man with sporting
propensities, and as the doctor swung open the gate and strode beside me
toward the hotel, Carnes trudging on in advance, the talk turned quite
naturally upon horses, and horse owners.
That night I wrote to Mrs. Ballou, stating that I had nothing of much
moment to impart, but desired that she would notify me several days in
advance of her proposed visit to the city, as I wished to meet her. This
letter I sent to our office to be forwarded to Groveland from thence.