THE ABBE DUBOIS.
All the world knows the commencement of the Abbe Dubois. We will not
enlarge on the history of his youth, which may be found in the memoirs
of the time, and particularly in those of the implacable Saint-Simon.
Dubois has not been calumniated--it was impossible; but all the evil has
been told of him, and not quite all the good.
There was in his antecedents, and in those of Alberoni, his rival, a
great resemblance, but the genius was on the side of Dubois; and in the
long struggle with Spain, which the nature of our subject does not allow
us to do more than indicate, all the advantage was with the son of the
apothecary over the son of the gardener. Dubois preceded Figaro, to whom
he probably served as type; but, more fortunate than he, he passed from
the office to the drawing-room, and from the drawing-room to the court.
All these successive advantages were the rewards of various services,
private or public.
His last negotiation was his chef-d'oeuvre; it was more than the
ratification of the treaty of Utrecht; it was a treaty more advantageous
still for France. The emperor not only renounced all right to the crown
of Spain, as Philip V. had renounced all his to the crown of France, but
he entered, with England and Holland, into a league, formed at once
against Spain on the south, and against Sweden and Russia on the north.
The division of the five or six great states of Europe was established
by this treaty on so solid and just a basis that, after a hundred years
of wars and revolutions, all these states, except the empire, remain in
the same situation that they then were.
On his part, the regent, not very particular by nature, loved this man,
who had educated him, and whose fortune he had made. The regent
appreciated in Dubois the talents he had, and was not too severe on the
vices from which he was not exempt. There was, however, between the
regent and Dubois an abyss. The regent's vices and virtues were those of
a gentleman, Dubois' those of a lackey. In vain the regent said to him,
at each new favor that he granted, "Dubois, take care, it is only a
livery-coat that I am putting on your back." Dubois, who cared about the
gift, and not about the manner in which it was given, replied, with that
apish grimace which belonged to him, "I am your valet, monseigneur,
dress me always the same."
Dubois, however, loved the regent, and was devoted to him. He felt that
this powerful hand alone had raised him from the sink in which he had
been found, and to which, hated and despised as he was by all, a sign
from the master might restore him. He watched with a personal interest
the hatreds and plots which might reach the prince; and more than once,
by the aid of a police often better managed than that of the
lieutenant-general, and which extended, by means of Madame de Tencin,
into the highest aristocracy, and, by means of La Fillon, to the lowest
grades of society, he had defeated conspiracies of which Messire Voyer
d'Argenson had not even heard a whisper.
Therefore the regent, who appreciated the services which Dubois had
rendered him, and could still render him, received the ambassador with
open arms. As soon as he saw him appear, he rose, and, contrary to the
custom of most princes, who depreciate the service in order to diminish
the reward--
"Dubois," said he, joyously, "you are my best friend, and the treaty of
the quadruple alliance will be more profitable to King Louis XV. than
all the victories of his ancestor, Louis XIV."
"Bravo!" said Dubois, "you do me justice, monseigneur, but, unluckily,
every one is not equally grateful."
"Ah! ah!" said the regent, "have you met my mother? She has just left
the room."
"And how is his majesty?" asked Dubois, with a smile full of a
detestable hope. "He was very poorly when I left."
"Well, abbe, very well," answered the prince, gravely. "God will
preserve him to us, I hope, for the happiness of France, and the shame
of our calumniators."
"And monseigneur sees him every day as usual?"
"I saw him yesterday, and I even spoke to him of you."
"Bah! and what did you tell him?"
"I told him that in all probability you had just secured the
tranquillity of his reign."
"And what did the king answer?"
"What did he answer! He answered, my friend, that he did not think abbes
were so useful."
"His majesty is very witty; and old Villeroy was there, without doubt?"
"As he always is."
"With your permission, I must send that old fellow to look for me at the
other end of France some fine morning. His insolence to you begins to
tire my patience."
"Leave him alone, Dubois, leave him alone, everything will come in
time."
"Even my archbishopric."
"Ha! What is this new folly?"
"New folly, monseigneur! on my honor nothing can be more serious."
"Oh! this letter from the king of England, which asks me for an
archbishopric for you--"
"Did your highness not recognize the style?"
"You dictated it, you rascal!"
"To Nericault Destouches, who got the king to sign it."
"And the king signed it as it is, without saying anything?"
"Exactly. 'You wish,' said he to our poet, 'that a Protestant prince
should interfere to make an archbishop in France. The regent will read
my recommendation, will laugh at it, and pay no attention to it.' 'Yes,
yes, sire,' replied Destouches, who has more wit than he puts into his
verses, 'the regent will laugh at it, but after all will do what your
majesty asks.'"
"Destouches lied."
"Destouches never spoke more truly, monseigneur."
"You an archbishop! King George would deserve that, in return, I should
point out to him some rascal like you for the archbishopric of York when
it becomes vacant."
"I defy you to find my equal--I know but one man."
"And who is he? I should like to know him."
"Oh, it is useless, he is already placed, and, as his place is good, he
would not change it for all the archbishoprics in the world."
"Insolent!"
"With whom are you angry, monseigneur?"
"With a fellow who wants to be an archbishop, and who has never yet
officiated at the communion table."
"I shall be all the better prepared."
"But the archdeaconship, the deaconship, the priesthood."
"Bah! We will find somebody; some second Jean des Entomeures, who will
dispatch all that in an hour."
"I defy you to find him."
"It is already done."
"And who is that?"
"Your first almoner, the bishop of Nantes, Tressan."
"The fellow has an answer for everything.--But your marriage?"
"My marriage!"
"Yes, Madame Dubois."
"Madame Dubois! Who is that?"
"What, fellow, have you assassinated her?"
"Monseigneur forgets that it is only three days since he gave her her
quarter's pension."
"And if she should oppose your archbishopric?"
"I defy her; she has no proofs."
"She may get a copy of the marriage certificate."
"There is no copy without an original."
"And the original?"
"Here it is," said Dubois, drawing from his pocket a little paper,
containing a pinch of ashes.
"What! and are you not afraid that I shall send you to the galleys?"
"If you wish to do so, now is the time, for I hear the lieutenant of
police speaking in the antechamber."
"Who sent for him?"
"I did."
"What for?"
"To find fault with him."
"For what reason?"
"You will hear. It is understood then--I am an archbishop."
"And have you already chosen your archbishopric?"
"Yes, I take Cambray."
"Peste! you are not modest."
"Oh, mon Dieu! it is not for the profit, it is for the honor of
succeeding Fenelon."
"Shall we have a new Telemachus?"
"Yes, if your highness will find me a Penelope in the kingdom."
"Apropos of Penelope, you know that Madame de Sabran--"
"I know all."
"Ah, abbe; your police, then, is as good as ever!"
"You shall judge."
Dubois stretched out his hand, rang the bell, and a messenger appeared.
"Send the lieutenant-general," said Dubois.
"But, abbe, it seems to me that it is you who give orders here now."
"It is for your good, monseigneur.--Let me do it."
"Well, well!" said the regent, "one must be indulgent to new-comers."
Messire Voyer d'Argenson entered--he was as ugly as Dubois, but his
ugliness was of a very different kind. He was tall, thick, and heavy;
wore an immense wig, had great bushy eyebrows, and was invariably taken
for the devil by children who saw him for the first time. But with all
this, he was supple, active, skillful, intriguing, and fulfilled his
office conscientiously, when he was not turned from his nocturnal duties
by other occupations.
"Messire d'Argenson," said Dubois, without even leaving the
lieutenant-general time to finish his bow, "monseigneur, who has no
secrets from me, has sent for you, that you may tell me in what costume
he went out last night, in whose house he passed the evening, and what
happened to him on leaving it. I should not need to ask these questions
if I had not just arrived from London; you understand, that as I
traveled post from Calais, I can know nothing of them."
"But," said D'Argenson, who thought these questions concealed some
snare, "did anything extraordinary happen last evening? I confess I
received no report; I hope no accident happened to monseigneur?"
"Oh, no, none; only monseigneur, who went out at eight o'clock in the
evening, as a French guard, to sup with Madame de Sabran, was nearly
carried off on leaving her house."
"Carried off!" cried D'Argenson, turning pale, while the regent could
not restrain a cry of astonishment, "carried off! and by whom?"
"Ah!" said Dubois, "that is what we do not know, and what you ought to
know, Messire d'Argenson, if you had not passed your time at the convent
of the Madeleine de Traisnel."
"What, D'Argenson! you, a great magistrate, give such an example!" said
the regent, laughing. "Never mind, I will receive you well, if you come,
as you have already done in the time of the late king, to bring me, at
the end of the year, a journal of my acts."
"Monseigneur," said the lieutenant, stammering, "I hope your highness
does not believe a word of what the Abbe Dubois says."
"What! instead of being humiliated by your ignorance, you give me the
lie. Monseigneur, I will take you to D'Argenson's seraglio; an abbess of
twenty-six, and novices of fifteen; a boudoir in India chintz, and cells
hung with tapestry. Oh, Monsieur le Lieutenant de Police knows how to do
things well."
The regent held his sides with laughing, seeing D'Argenson's disturbed
face.
"But," replied the lieutenant of police, trying to bring back the
conversation to the less disagreeable, though more humiliating subject,
"there is not much merit, abbe, in your knowing the details of an event,
which, doubtless, monseigneur himself told you."
"On my honor," said the regent, "I did not tell him a single word."
"Listen, lieutenant; is it monseigneur also who told me the story of the
novice of the Faubourg Saint-Marceau, whom you so nearly carried off
over the convent walls? Is it monseigneur who told me of that house
which you have had built under a false name, against the wall of the
convent of the Madeleine, so that you can enter at all hours by a door
hidden in a closet, and which opens on to the sacristy of the chapel of
Saint Mark, your patron? No, no, all that, my dear lieutenant, is the
infancy of the art, and he who only knew this, would not, I hope, be
worthy to hold a candle to you."
"Listen, abbe," replied the lieutenant of police with a grave air, "if
all you have told me about monseigneur is true, the thing is serious and
I am in the wrong not to know it, if any one does--but there is no time
lost. We will find the culprits, and punish them as they deserve."
"But," said the regent, "you must not attach too much importance to
this; they were, probably, some drunken officers who wished to amuse
their companions."
"It is a conspiracy, monseigneur," replied Dubois, "which emanates from
the Spanish embassy, passing through the Arsenal before it arrives at
the Palais Royal."
"Again, Dubois?"
"Always, monseigneur."
"And you, D'Argenson, what is your opinion?"
"That your enemies are capable of anything, monseigneur; but that we
will mar their plots, whatever they may be, I give you my word."
At this moment the door opened, and the Duc de Maine was announced, who
came to attend the council, and whose privilege it was, as prince of the
blood, not to be kept waiting. He advanced with that timid and uneasy
air which was natural to him, casting a side-glance over the three
persons in whose presence he found himself, as though to discover what
subject occupied them at his entrance. The regent understood his
thought.
"Welcome, my cousin," said he; "these two bad fellows--whom you
know--have just been assuring me that you are conspiring against me."
The Duc de Maine turned as pale as death, and was obliged to lean for
support on the crutch-shaped stick which he carried.
"And I hope, monseigneur," replied he, in a voice which he vainly
endeavored to render firm, "that you did not give ear to such a
calumny."
"Oh, mon Dieu! no!" replied the regent negligently; "but they are
obstinate, and declare that they will take you one day in the fact. I do
not believe it, but at any rate I give you warning; be on your guard
against them, for they are clever fellows, I warrant you."
The Duc de Maine opened his mouth to give some contemptible excuse, when
the door opened again, and the groom announced successively the Duc de
Bourbon, the Prince de Conti, the Duc de St. Simon, the Duc de Guiche,
captain of the guards; the Duc Noailles, president of the council of
finance; the Duc d'Antin, superintendent of ships; the Marshal
d'Uxelles, president of the council of foreign affairs; the Archbishop
of Troyes; the Marquis de Lavrilliere; the Marquis d'Efflat; the Duc de
Laforce; the Marquis de Torcy; and the Marshals de Villeroy, d'Estrees,
de Villars, and de Bezons.
As these grave personages were gathered together to deliberate upon the
treaty of the quadruple alliance, brought from London by Dubois, and as
the treaty of the quadruple alliance only figures secondarily in this
history, our readers will excuse our leaving the sumptuous
reception-room in the Palais Royal, to lead them back to the attic in
the Rue du Temps-Perdu.