_Mrs. Uncouth._ Brother, I recommend to you our dear guest, Mr.
Truthful; and to you, sir, I recommend my brother.
_Truthful._ Am glad to make your acquaintance.
_Beastly._ Very well, sir. What is your name? I did not quite hear it.
_Truthful._ My name is Truthful, so that you may hear it.
_Beastly._ Where born, sir? Where are your villages?
_Truthful._ I was born in Moscow, if you must know that, and my
villages are in this province.
_Beastly._ And may I ask you,--I do not know your name and
patronymic,--are there any pigs in your villages?
_Mrs. Uncouth._ Now, stop, brother, asking about your pigs. We had
better talk about our trouble. (_To Truthful._) Listen, sir! By God’s
command we have taken this maiden upon our hands. She deigns to receive
letters from her uncles: you see, her uncles write to her from heaven.
Do us the kindness, sir, and read us this letter aloud.
_Truthful._ Excuse me, madam, I never read letters without the
permission of those to whom they have been addressed.
_Sophia._ On the contrary, I beg you to do me the favour.
_Truthful._ If you so order. (_He reads._)
“Dear niece! My affairs have compelled me to live for some years away
from my relatives, and the great distance has deprived me of the
pleasure of hearing any news from you. I am now living in Moscow after
having been for some years in Siberia. I am a living example that it
is possible by work and honesty to gain some wealth. By these means,
fortune smiling upon me, I have saved up enough to have ten thousand
roubles yearly income----”
_Beastly and the Uncouths._ Ten thousand!
_Truthful_ (_reads_). “Of which I make you, dear niece, my sole
heiress----”
_Mrs. Uncouth._ You an heiress! }
}
_Uncouth._ Sophia an heiress! } (_All together._)
}
_Beastly._ Her an heiress! }
_Mrs. Uncouth_ (_hastening to embrace Sophia_). I congratulate you,
Sophia! I congratulate you, my darling! I am beside myself with joy!
Now you need a husband. I, I could not wish a better bride for my
Mitrofán. That’s what I call a fine uncle! A real father! I always
thought that God was taking care of him, that he was still alive.
_Beastly_ (_stretching out his hand_). Well, sister, let us settle it
right away.
_Mrs. Uncouth_ (_whispering to Beastly_). Wait, brother, first we have
to ask her whether she wants you.
_Beastly._ What a question! Or do you really want to report to her as
to a superior person?
_Truthful._ Do you want me to finish the letter?
_Beastly._ What for? Even if you were to keep on reading for five years
you could not read out of it anything better than ten thousand.
_Mrs. Uncouth_ (_to Sophia_). Sophia, my darling! Come with me to
my sleeping-room. I have some important matter to talk to you about
(_leading Sophia out_).
_Beastly._ Pshaw! I see there is not much chance for a betrothal to-day!