Mavis's ride to Pennington was her last appearance out of doors for
many a long day. For weeks she lay at Mrs Trivett's on the borderland
of death. For nights on end, it was the merest chance whether or not
she would live to see another dawn; but, in the end, youth, aided by
skilful doctoring and careful nursing, prevailed against the dread
illness which had fastened on her brain. As she slowly got better, the
blurred shadows which had previously hovered about her took shape into
doctor, nurses, and Mrs Trivett. When they told her how ill she had
been, and how much better she was, despair filled her heart. She had no
wish to live; her one desire was to join her little one beyond the
grave.
A time came when the improvement which had set in was not maintained;
she failed to get better, yet did not become worse, although Mavis
rejoiced in the belief that her health was daily declining. Often, she
would wake in the night to listen with glad ears to the incessant
ticking of the American clock on the mantelpiece. If alone she would
say:
"Go on, go on, little clock, and shorten the time till I again see my
dearest."
As if in obedience to her behest, the clock seemed to tick with renewed
energy.
Sometimes she would try and picture the unspeakable bliss which would
be hers when the desire of her heart was gratified. She often thanked
God that she would soon be with Him and her little one. She believed
that He found His happiness in witnessing the joy of mothers at again
meeting with their children from whom they had been parted for so long.
She had no idea who paid the expenses of her illness; she was assured
by Mrs Trivett, whom she often questioned on the subject, that there
was no cause for uneasiness on the matter. Her health still refusing to
improve, a further medical adviser was called in. He suggested foreign
travel as the most beneficial course for Mavis to pursue. But the
patient flatly refused to go abroad; for a reason she could not divine,
the name of Swanage constantly recurred to her mind. She did not at
once remember that she had seen the name on the labels of the luggage
which had cumbered the hall on the night when she had called at the
Devitts. She often spoke of this watering-place, till at last it was
decided that, as she had this resort so constantly in her mind, it
might do her good to go there. Even then, it was many more weeks before
she was well enough to be moved. She remained in a condition of torpor
which the visits of Windebank or Miss Toombs failed to dissipate. At
last, when a mild February came, it was deemed possible for her to make
the journey. The day before it was arranged that she should start, she
was told that a gentleman, who would give no name, and who had come in
a carriage of which the blinds were drawn, wished to see her. When she
went down to the parlour, she saw a spare old man, with a face much
lined and wrinkled, who was clad in ill-fitting, old-fashioned clothes,
fidgeting about the room.
"You wish to see me?" asked Mavis, as she wondered who he could be.
"Yes. My name's Perigal: Major Perigal."
Mavis did not speak.
The man seemed surprised at her silence.
"I--I knew your father," he remarked.
"I knew your son," said Mavis icily.
"More's the pity!"
Mavis looked up, mildly surprised. The man continued:
"He's mean: mean right through. I've nothing good to say of him. I know
him too well."
Mavis kept silent. Major Perigal went on:
"A nice mess you've made of it."
The girl's eyes held the ghost of a smile. He continued:
"I did my best for you, but you thought yourself too clever."
Mavis looked up inquiringly.
"When I heard who it was he was going to marry, I wanted to do you a
good turn for your father's sake, as I knew Charles could never make
you happy. I forbade the marriage, knowing he wouldn't face poverty for
you. He's hateful: hateful right through."
"And if we'd married?"
"I'd have come round, especially after seeing you. You're a
daughter-in-law any man would be proud of. And now he's married that
Devitt girl for her money."
"For her money?" queried Mavis.
"What little she has. Never mind her: I want to speak of you. For all
your fine looks, you were too clever by half."
"What do you mean?" she asked, with dull, even voice.
"What I say. That for all your grand appearance you were much too
knowing. Since you couldn't get him one way, you thought you'd have him
another."
"You mean---"
"By doing as you did."
"You insult me!" cried Mavis, now roused from her lethargy.
"Eh?"
"Insult me. And that is why you came. But since you're here, you may as
well know I made a mess of it, as you call it, because I loved your
son. If I'd the time over again, I suppose I'd be just such another
fool. I can't help it. I loved him. I wish you good morning."
Major Pengal had never been so taken aback in his life. Mavis's words
and manner carried conviction to his heart.
"I didn't know--I beg your pardon--I take hack my words," he said
confusedly.
Mavis relapsed into her previous torpor.
"I didn't know there was such a woman in the world," he continued.
"What you must have been through!"
Mavis did not speak.
"May I have the honour of calling on you again?" he asked with
old-fashioned courtesy.
"It would be useless. I go away to-morrow."
"For good?"
"For some weeks."
"If you return, perhaps you would honour me by calling on me. I never
see anyone. But, if you would permit me to say so, your friendship
would be an honour."
"Thank you, but I don't know what I shall be doing," said Mavis wearily.
A few moments later, Major Perigal took his leave, but without
recovering from his unaffected surprise at Mavis's honesty. He looked
at her many times, to say, as he went out of the door of the parlour:
"I always believed Charles to have brains: now I know him to be a
cursed fool."
The following day, Mavis, accompanied by Mrs Trivett and Jill, set out
for Swanage. They took train to Dorchester, where they changed into the
South-Western system, which carried them to Swanage, after making a
further change at ancient Wareham. Arrived at Swanage station, they
took a fly to the house of a Mrs Budd, where lodgings, at the doctor's
recommendation, had been secured. On their way to Mrs Budd's, Mavis
noticed a young man in a hand-propelled tricycle, which the fly
overtook. The nature of the machine told Mavis that its occupant was a
cripple.
If she had encountered him eighteen months ago, her heart would have
filled with pity at seeing the comely young man's extremity: now, she
looked at him very much as she might have noticed a cat crossing the
road.
Mrs Budd was waiting on the doorstep in anxious expectation of her
lodgers. To see her white hair, all but toothless mouth, and wrinkled
face, she looked seventy, which was about her age; but to watch her
alert, brisk movements, it would seem as if she enjoyed the energy of
twenty. She ushered Mavis into her apartments, talking volubly the
while; but the latter could not help seeing that, whereas she was
treated with the greatest deference by the landlady, this person quite
ignored the existence of Mrs Trivett.
It was with a feeling of relief that Mavis sat down to a meal after the
door had been closed on Mrs Budd's chatter. The change had already done
her good. Her eyes rested approvingly on the spotless table
appointments.
"Poor dear!" exclaimed Mrs Trivett in pitying tones, who waited to see
if Mavis had everything she wanted before eating with Mrs Budd in the
kitchen.
"What's the matter?" asked Mavis.
"I knew something dreadful would happen. It's the anniversary of the
day on which I had my first lot of new teeth, which gave me such
dreadful pain."
"What's wrong?"
"That Mrs Budd. I took a dislike to her directly I saw her."
Mavis stared at Mrs Trivett in surprise.
"I do hope you'll be comfortable," continued Mrs Trivett. "But I fear
you won't be. She looks the sort of person who would give anyone damp
sheets and steal the sugar."
Mrs Trivett said more to the same effect. Mavis, remembering Mrs Budd's
behaviour to her, could scarcely keep back a smile; it was the first
time since her illness that anything had appeared at all amusing.
But this was not the sum of Mrs Trivett's resentment against Mrs Budd.
After the meal was over, she rejoined Mavis with perspiration dropping
from her forehead.
"The kitchen's like an oven, and I've nearly been roasted," complained
Mrs Trivett. "And her horrid old husband is there, who can't do
anything for himself."
"Why didn't you leave before you got so hot?" asked Mavis.
"It's that there Mrs Budd's fault. She's only one tooth, and it takes
her all her time to eat."
"I meant, why didn't you leave so that you could finish eating in here?"
"I didn't like to, ma'am, but if you wouldn't very much mind in
future---"
"By all means, eat with me if you wish it."
"Thank you kindly. I'm sure that woman and me would come to blows
before many days was over."
Mavis rested for the remainder of the day and only saw Mrs Budd during
the few minutes in which the table was being either laid or cleared
away; but these few minutes were enough for the landlady to tell Mavis
pretty well everything of moment in her life. Mavis learned how Mrs
Budd's husband had been head gardener to a neighbouring baronet, until
increasing infirmities had compelled him to give up work; also, that as
he had spent most of his life in hot-houses, the kitchen had always to
have a big fire blazing in order that the old man might have the heat
necessary for his comfort. It appeared that Mrs Budd's third daughter
had died from curvature of the spine. The mother related with great
pride how that, just before death, the girl's spine had formed the
figure of a perfect "hess." Mavis was also informed that Mrs Budd could
not think of knowing her next-door neighbour, because this person paid
a penny a pound less for her suet than she herself did.
When Mavis was going upstairs to bed, she came upon Mrs Budd
laboriously dragging her husband, a big, heavy man, up to bed by means
of a cord slung about her shoulders and fastened to his waist. Mavis
subsequently learned that Mrs Budd had performed this feat every night
for the last four years, her husband having lost the use of his limbs.
After Mavis had been a few days at Mrs Budd's, she was sufficiently
recovered to walk about Swanage. One day she was even strong enough to
get as far as the Tilly Whim caves, where she was both surprised and
disgusted to find that some surpassing mediocrity had had the
fatuousness to deface the sheer glory of the cliffs with improving
texts, such as represent the sum of the world's wisdom to the mind of a
successful grocer, who has a hankering after the natural science which
is retailed in ninepenny popular handbooks. Often in these walks, Mavis
encountered the man whom she had seen upon the day of her arrival; as
before, he was pulling himself along on his tricycle. The first two or
three times they met, the cripple looked very hard at Jill, who always
accompanied her mistress. Afterwards, he took no notice of the dog; he
had eyes only for Mavis, in whom he appeared to take a lively interest.
Mavis, who was well used to being stared at by men, paid no heed to the
man's frequent glances in her direction.
The sea air and the change did much for Mavis's health; she was
gradually roused from the lethargy from which she had suffered for so
long. But with the improvement in her condition came a firmer
realisation of the hard lot which was hers. Her love for Charlie
Perigal had resulted in the birth of a child. Although her lover had
broken his vows, she could, in some measure, have consoled herself for
his loss by devoting her life to the upbringing of her boy. Now her
little one had been taken from her, leaving a vast emptiness in her
life which nothing could fill. God, fate, chance, whatever power it was
that ruled her life, had indeed dealt hardly with her. She felt an old
woman, although still a girl in years. She had no interest in life: she
had nothing, no one to live for.
One bright March day, Mavis held two letters in her hand as she sat by
the window of her sitting-room at Mrs Budd's. She read and re-read
them, after which her eyes would glance with much perplexity in the
direction of the daffodils now opening in the garden in front of the
house. She pondered the contents of the letters; then, as if to
distract her thoughts from an unpalatable conclusion, which the subject
matter of one of the letters brought home to her, she fell to thinking
of the daffodils as though they were the unselfish nurses of the other
flowers, insomuch as they risked their frail lives in order to see if
the world were yet warm enough for the other blossoms now abed snugly
under the earth. The least important of the two letters was from Major
Perigal; it had been forwarded on from Melkbridge. In his cramped, odd
hand, he expressed further admiration for Mavis's conduct; he begged
her to let him know directly she returned to Melkbridge, so that he
might have the honour of calling on her again. The other letter was
from Windebank, in which he briefly asked Mavis if she would honour him
by becoming his wife. Mavis was much distressed. However brutally her
heart had been bruised by the events of the last few months, she
sometimes believed (this when the sun was shining) that some day it
would be possible for her to conjure up some semblance of affection for
Windebank, especially if she saw much of him. His mere presence
radiated an atmosphere of protection. It offered a welcome harbourage
after the many bufferings she had suffered upon storm-tossed seas. If
she could have gone to him as she had to Perigal, she would not have
hesitated a moment. Now, so far as she was concerned, there was all the
difference in the world. Although she knew that her soul was not
defiled by her experience with Perigal, she had dim perceptions of the
way in which men, particularly manly males, looked upon such
happenings. It was not in the nature of things, after all that had
occurred, for Windebank to want her in a way in which she would wish to
be desired by the man of her choice. Here was, apparently, no
overmastering passion, but pity excited by her misfortunes. Mavis had
got out of Mrs Trivett (who had long since left for Melkbridge) that it
was Windebank who had insisted on paying the expenses of her illness
and stay at Swanage, in spite of Major Perigal's and his son's desire
to meet all costs that had been incurred. Mavis also learned that
Windebank and Charles Perigal had had words on the subject--words which
had culminated in blows when Windebank had told Perigal in unmeasured
terms what he thought of his conduct to Mavis.
As Mavis recalled Windebank's generosity with regard to her illness, it
seemed to her that this proposal of marriage was all of a piece with
his other behaviour since her baby had died. Consideration for her, not
love, moved his heart. If she were indeed so much to him, why did he
not come down and beg her with passionate words to join her life to his?
Mavis made no allowance for the man's natural delicacy for her
feelings, which he considered must have been cruelly harrowed by all
she had lately suffered. Just now, there was no room in her world for
the more delicate susceptibilities of emotion. She wholly misjudged
him, and the more she thought of it, the more she believed that his
letter was dictated by pity rather than love. This pity irked her pride
and made her disinclined to accept his offer.
Then Mavis thought of Major Perigal's letter. It flattered her to think
how her personality appealed to those of her own social kind. She began
to realise what a desirable wife she would have made if it had not been
for her meeting and subsequent attachment to Charlie Perigal. Any man,
Windebank, but for this experience, would have been proud to have made
her his wife. She believed that her whole-hearted devotion to a
worthless man had for ever cut her off from love, wifehood,
motherhood--things for which her being starved. Then she tried to
fathom the why and wherefore of it all. She had always tried to do
right: in situations where events were foreign to her control, she had
trusted to her Heavenly Father for protection. "Why was it," she asked
herself, "that her lot had not been definitely thrown in with Windebank
before she had met with Charles Perigal? Why?" Such was her resentment
at the ordering of events, that she set her teeth and banged her
clenched fist upon the arm of her chair.
At that moment the crippled man wheeled himself past the house on his
self-propelled tricycle. He looked intently at the window of the room
that Mavis occupied. At the same moment Mrs Budd came into the room to
ask what Mavis would like for luncheon.
"Who is that passing?" asked Mavis.
The old woman ran lightly to the window.
"The gentleman on that machine?"
"Yes. I've often seen him about."
"It's Mr Harold Devitt, miss."
"Harold Devitt! Where does he come from?" asked Mavis of Mrs Budd, who
had a genius for gleaning the gossip of the place.
"Melkbridge. He's the eldest son of Mr Montague Devitt, a very rich
gentleman. Mr Harold lives at Mrs Buck's with a male nurse to look
after him, poor fellow."
Mrs Budd went on talking, but Mavis did not hear what she was saying.
Mention of the name of Devitt was the spark that set alight a raging
conflagration in her being. She had lost a happy married life with
Windebank, to be as she now was, entirely owing to the Devitts. Now it
was all plain enough--so plain that she wondered how she had not seen
it before. It was the selfish action of the Devitts, who wished to
secure Windebank for their daughter, which had prevented Montague from
giving Mavis the message that Windebank had given to him. It was the
Devitts who had not taken her into their house, because they feared how
she might meet Windebank in Melkbridge. It was the Devitts who had
given her work in a boot factory, which resulted in her meeting with
Perigal. It was the Devitts, in the person of Victoria, who had
prevented Perigal from keeping his many times repeated promises to
marry Mavis. The Devitts had blighted her life. Black hate filled her
heart, overflowed and poisoned her being. She hungered to be revenged
on these Devitts, to repay them with heavy interest for the irreparable
injury to her life for which she believed them responsible. Then, she
remembered how tenderly Montague Devitt had always spoken of his
invalid boy Harold; a soft light had come into his eyes on the few
occasions on which Mavis had asked after him. A sudden resolution
possessed her, to be immediately weakened by re-collections of
Montague's affection for his son. Then a procession of the events in
her life, which were for ever seared into her memory, passed before her
mind's eye--the terror that possessed her when she learned that she was
to be a mother; her interview with Perigal at Dippenham; her first
night in London, when she had awakened in the room in the Euston Road;
Mrs Gowler's; her days of starvation in Halverton Street; the death and
burial, not only of her boy, but of her love for and faith in
Perigal--all were remembered. Mavis's mind was made up. She went to her
bedroom, where, with infinite deliberation, she dressed for going out.
"Mr Harold Devitt!" she said, when she came upon him waiting on his
tricycle by the foolish little monument raised to the memory of one of
Alfred the Great's victories over invading Danes.
The man raised his hat, while he looked intently at Mavis.
"I have to thank you for almost the dearest treasure I've ever
possessed. Do you remember Jill?"
"Of course: I wondered if it might prove to be she when I first saw
her. But is your name, by any chance, Miss Keeves?"
Mavis nodded.
"I've often wondered if I were ever going to meet you. And when I saw
you about---"
"You noticed me?"
"Who could help it? I'm in luck."
"What do you mean?" she asked lightly.
"Meeting with you down here."
Thus they talked for quite a long while. Long before they separated for
the day, Mavis's eyes had been smiling into his.