TWO.

Darius was extremely ill. Every part of his physical organism was

deranged and wearied out. His features combined the expression of

intense fatigue with the sinister liveliness of an acute tragic

apprehension. His failing faculties were kept horribly alert by the

fear of what was going to happen to him next. So much that was

appalling had already happened to him! He wanted repose; he wanted

surcease; he wanted nothingness. He was too tired to move, but he was

also too tired to lie still. And thus he writhed faintly on the bed;

his body seemed to have that vague appearance of general movement which

a multitude of insects will give to a piece of decaying matter. His

skin was sick, and his hair, and his pale lips. The bed could not be

kept tidy for five minutes.

"He's bad, no mistake!" thought Edwin, as he met his father's anxious

and intimidated gaze. He had never seen anyone so ill. He knew now

what disease could do.

"Where's Nurse?" the old man murmured, with excessive feebleness, his

voice captiously rising to a shrill complaint.

"She's not well. She's lying down. I'm going to sit with you to-night.

Have a drink?" As Edwin said these words in his ordinary voice, it

seemed to him that in comparison with his father he was a god of

miraculous proud strength and domination.

Darius nodded.

"Her's a Tartar!" Darius muttered. "But her's just! Her will have her

own way!" He often spoke thus of the nurse, giving people to understand

that during the long nights, when he was left utterly helpless to the

harsh mercy of the nurse, he had to accept many humiliations. He seemed

to fear and love her as a dog its master. Edwin, using his imagination

to realise the absoluteness of the power which the nurse had over Darius

during ten hours in every twenty-four, was almost frightened by it. "By

Jove!" he thought, "I wouldn't be in his place with any woman on earth!"

The old man's lips closed clumsily round the funnel of the invalid's

cup that Edwin offered. Then he sank back, and shut his eyes, and

appeared calmer.

Edwin smoothed the clothes, stared at him a long time, and finally sat

down in the arm-chair by the fire. He wound up his watch. It was not

yet midnight. He took off his boots and put on the slippers which now

Darius had not worn for over a week and would not wear again. He yawned

heavily. The yawn surprised him. He perceived that his head was

throbbing and his mouth dry, and that the meats and liquors of the

banquet, having ceased to stimulate, were incommoding him. His mind and

body were in reaction. He reflected cynically upon the facile

self-satisfactions of those successful men in whose company he had been.

The whole dinner grew unreal. Nothing was real except imprisonment on

a bed night and day, day and night for weeks. Every one could have

change and rest save his father. For his father there was no relief,

not a moment's. He was always there, in the same recess, prone, in

subjection, helpless, hopeless, and suffering. Politics! What were

they?

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Clayhanger · 第 328 / 427 题