I was born and raised in a dear little nook in York state. There were
four girls in our family, my oldest sister being deaf and dumb. After a
time she and sister next to her married, then myself and youngest sister
were left with father and mother. A young man came to our village to
teach the village school. We became acquainted and in time were married.
Mr. H---- built us a nice little home and we settled down to a very
happy life. Our home was just a short distance from my parents. My deaf
sister was married to a deaf and dumb man. He had a high temper and did
not treat sister Nellie very kindly. After awhile Nellie came home to
live with our parents, bringing her little twin babies with her. We all
helped to care for them and then John, her husband, seemed more kind.
Five years rolled around, when one day three Mormon elders came to our
village, going around from house to house talking their doctrine,
calling themselves Latter Day Saints. They visited us. My mother being
in, she seemed greatly taken with their talk. They came again in a few
days. Mr. H---- was out in the fields, and when I told them they said
they would go out and find him. They did so and remained with us for
supper, staying the evening; then father came over to hear them talk.
One of the men was a fluent talker. He kept the attention of all when
speaking. I felt a great dread; I knew not why. Then they held services
in our little church in the evenings, which continued a week. Many were
greatly excited. My parents and younger sister, Sarah, my husband and a
number of our neighbors. The men left us promising to come again soon,
when they hoped many would join their religion. I could see as the days
went by Mr. H---- and my people, with others, were ready to follow these
men.
I said all I could to discourage them, but it was of no use, I could do
nothing. Preparations were made to leave. Our home was sold at a
sacrifice and father's the same. At the time set the three elders came
again, holding more meetings. Our goods were packed; also father's and
mother's, and as Nellie and the babies could not be left, we took them
with us. One pleasant day in August we bade farewell to our dear old
home and kind good neighbors I had known my lifetime. And with many
tears of sorrow and regret on my part we started for the Promised Land.
After a tedious trip we reached "Beaver Island." I need not try to tell
how disappointed many of us were, as everything was so different from
what it had been represented to us. The island itself was very
beautiful, just as nature had made it. But to us that had come from a
settled country with farms all cultivated, it was a great change. I saw
Mr. H---- was very low-spirited, and knowing we must make the best of
it, I tried to cheer him, saying, "Now we will soon make us another
home, and if all is well we shall soon be as happy as we were before.
But you know I can never enjoy this new doctrine." We also found when
reaching the island that the bright talking elder was "King Strange"
himself, and he well knew I had no sympathy or belief in his teachings.
However, Strang gave us our choice of a building spot and we chose as
pleasant a place as possible, with father and mother near us, just a
short distance from the pretty little Font Lake. We tried to make our
home like the one we had left behind. I went to work with a will helping
Mr. H---- to build the new home. That first winter I never like to think
about, the people suffered so much, but were always patient, never
complaining. The next spring I helped to make our garden, also our
flower garden, putting in the seeds I had brought from the old home.
That first winter we endured hunger and cold, but I tried to bear it
without complaint. I kept the best for my husband to eat and many times
went supperless to bed, fearing there would not be enough for his
breakfast, as he had to be out chopping wood during the day. A tenth
part of our income must be given to the King, and sometimes there was
little left, as there was always extras to help other expenses. We had
plenty of clothing when we came, but in a few months we had divided most
of it with our suffering neighbors. With hard work and scanty food, and
great anxiety about Nellie's sick babies, it began to tell on my health.
I scarcely knew a care in the old home, now it all seemed to fall on me.
When spring came I was much run down in health. When Mr. H---- would
sometimes blame himself I would cheer him up by telling him, "Never
mind, we have each other, and together we can endure almost anything."
We dared not talk much to others that we felt any disappointment. We
soon found the King exacted perfect obedience from his people. I knew in
my heart he did not like me because he could not win me over to his
belief.
The third year we began to be a little more comfortable, and I found a
little more time to rest. I had been so busy with hard work trying to
make our home bright and cheerful I had not noticed what was going on at
the Tabernacle meetings. I soon began to hear rumors how the king was
preaching polygamy. I felt worried and I could see that other women
were the same, though we dared not talk much together about the King's
affairs. I spoke with my husband about it and he said, "Have no fears.
Strang can never make me bring another wife into our home." Soon a
friend told me she feared our husbands might be forced to obey the law
that the King had made. She was an elder's wife. She then told me my
husband was soon to be ordained as an elder. Again I spoke to my husband
about my fears. He took me in his arms, saying, "Have no fears Mary. We
have worked and suffered together and do I not know how you have endured
hunger and cold and gave up our pleasant home to come here with me? I
will never desert you or treat you so mean as to bring another into our
home. The King has urged me to do so, but I told him I could not obey
that command." In a few days several women came asking me to join them
in voting down Strang's new law. I said to them. "No, I dare not oppose
that man. I feel such a dreadful fear of him." In a day or two they came
again, saying, "Mrs. H---- you will be sorry if you do not help us try
to vote against this law. We believe if we women band ourselves
together, and now that we have the right to vote on this subject the
king may think better of it when he sees how we feel about it, and don't
you feel afraid your husband may bring home another wife?" I said, "Oh,
no, I am sure this cannot be." Then they left me. I felt like one in a
dream. This seemed such a strange life to live. I did so long to once
more feel free like I used to in the other days. I tried hard at times
to understand about this religion, but could not. I went very seldom to
the Tabernacle to hear the preaching so I knew very little about what
was said. Father and mother never talked about the old home any more. To
them it was as if it never had been. Mr. H----, too, never talked about
it, and sometimes I wondered had I dreamed that we ever lived in our
eastern home. It was very seldom I ever went to the harbor, as my
husband always brought me anything I wanted. I often heard about the
parties given there, but never attended any.
One pleasant day in August, the eighth anniversary of our wedding, my
husband said to me, "I shall not be home to dinner as there is some very
important business to be done at the temple among the elders. Have tea
at five o'clock and I shall surely be home at that hour." I followed him
to the door saying, "Now remember, Mr. H----, this is our anniversary."
He kissed me saying, "I will remember it Mary and be home at five." I
sang at my work as I had not done before for months. I felt so happy. I
looked about the home and it seemed more like the old home in York
State: my flowers on each side the walk to the gate, in front the
mountain ash was lovely, and my climbing rose bushes all about, which
gave it all such a home-like look. I soon started for the woods to
gather wild flowers, mosses and trailing vines to trim the room with so
it would look nice when Mr. H---- came home. I met a neighbor and asked
her to go with me. She said. "No, my heart is too sad. I fear my husband
will soon bring home another wife. Are you not afraid Mrs. H----?" I
answered, "No I am not afraid, for Mr H---- would tell me so if anything
like that was to happen." She gave me such a sad look with her eyes full
of tears. Pulling her sunbonnet over her face she passed on. I gathered
my flowers and vines, returned home and trimmed my rooms. I put the
vines around my white muslin window curtains with the pretty lace I had
knit around the edge and the white bed curtains to match. I set my table
the prettiest I knew how, with the lovely wild flowers in the center; I
then ran over to mother, telling her all I had done. I saw her and
sister Sarah exchange looks, both saying they were glad I had done so. I
played with the children a few minutes, then ran home to prepare the
tea. I wore a pink muslin dress, the only one I had left from the old
home, and a pretty white apron, the last I had of the kind. Somehow the
day had been long, but I felt no fear, only a sadness for the neighbor I
had met. Her sorrowful face seemed always before me. Remembering my
husband was fond of warm biscuit, I made some, and just as the clock
struck five I heard the gate click and our faithful dog Tiger give a low
growl. I thought strangers must be coming, as he always barked with
delight to see his master. I hurried to the door. Mr H---- was coming up
the path with a woman holding to his arm. Before I had time to move or
speak they stepped past me into the house. Mr. H---- said to me, "Mary
let me introduce you to my wife to whom I have just been sealed in
spirit this day, and I hope you will welcome her and show her the
respect which is her due from you." I stood still; I could not move; I
could not speak; my tongue would not move in my mouth. I tried to say
"husband, husband," but no sound came. Oh the agony I suffered! I could
only follow them with my eyes. I could not speak; I was dumb. The woman
gave me an insolent look, saying, "I guess I must have been expected.
The house seems to be pretty well fixed up, but she doesn't seem to be
very glad. She'll get used to it soon. We'll make her know that I am the
mistress here now. Won't we Mr. H----?" He smiled and nodded, saying,
"Come let's have some supper. Come Mary, pour the tea." I rushed from
the house, running to my mother's house. She met me calmly at the door.
"Oh mother, did you know of this?" She answered, "Yes Mary, we all knew
it all along and what is the use of making any fuss. It's God's
commands." I ran to my sister. She laughed, saying to me, "Well, you
must be a fool. You ought to be proud to know your husband is made an
apostle of the Church of Zion and already blessed with a spiritual wife.
Now do have some sense and don't disgrace us all." It just began to dawn
upon me my sister was just the rankest little Mormon alive. I then went
to my father, thinking I would receive sympathy from him. He said, "Now
Mary do be quiet. Your husband has talked this over with us. We all
thought best to say nothing to you about it and when you saw it could
not be helped you would just settle down. Your mother and I believe in
this doctrine, and we think it is right." I stayed to hear no more.
Wild with grief I ran back home. Oh, my home no longer, to make a last
appeal to my husband, to be sure it was not a horrible joke just to try
me. I rushed in, throwing myself down at his feet, crying. "Tell me,
tell me this is not true! Tell me it is only a joke to try me." I very
soon learned it was only too true. They both threatened me with a
straight jacket, with bread and water diet until I would quietly submit.
I got upon my feet and staggered from the door down the walk to the
road. I was blind, my limbs refused to carry me, and just as I was
sinking down my dumb sister caught me in her arms. She had seen by my
face I was in great trouble, and she saw my mother did not sympathize
with me. She followed me, then looking toward the house saw the two
standing together. She seemed to understand what it meant, and the first
sound I ever heard her make aloud, she gave a hoarse cry and partly
dragged me away to a large log beside the road a short distance from the
house. It was a large tree that was upturned from the roots and
sheltered us from the passers-by. She rubbed my hands, smoothed my hair,
pressing kisses upon my face, and showing me she sympathized with me in
my trouble. Many times she showed anger, stamping on the ground and
shaking her fist toward the house. The moon had risen, and every time I
opened my eyes I could not bear to look at it. I wanted it all dark.
Dark as midnight. Dark as the world now seemed to me. After awhile the
neighbor woman I had met in the morning came to me. She took my hands
saying, "Mrs. H---- I am truly sorry for you. I wanted to tell you this
morning, but you seemed so happy I could not do it. I saw you had entire
belief in your husband's word. I blame him very much for not telling you
his intentions. You might have felt different about it. I, too, have
just one week of freedom, then my husband brings in another wife, as he,
too, was made an apostle today. But in my case I have been told of it
and have the privilege of choosing among the young women the one I think
I can best endure. I have chosen a friend of mine. We have agreed to
live as sisterly as possible. For my four children's sake I can endure
much and I don't see how I can help myself; but I must not be found
talking with you, as such things are forbidden." In a still lower tone
she said, "I will help you all I can in your sorrow." She pressed a kiss
on my face and was gone. I sat beside my dumb sister thinking. "Was it
for this I had suffered cold and hunger, leaving our comfortable home in
New York State? And of all the days in the year, the anniversary of our
wedding day he had brought home the most homely old grass widow to be
found on the island, that everybody detested." The king said afterwards
he did this to humble my pride. After the woman left us Nellie made me
understand she would go to mother's and get me a shawl. The dew was
falling, I had no wrap, my dress was muslin. She made me understand I
was to wait here until she came back. As soon as she left me I partly
crawled and dragged myself to little Font Lake, which was about a
quarter of a mile distant. I laid myself down on the moss covered bank,
the darkness of despair rolled over me. My husband did not seem the same
to me now. He seemed only a great monster beast that I wanted to get
away from. I thought how happy our home had been before we knew anything
about these strange people, and the dear friends I had left to come to
this island. Then I thought of baby's grave far away in the old home. I
could endure it no longer. I would end it all by plunging into the
little lake where my husband and I had strolled so many times along its
green shores. I gave the leap that would end my earthly suffering. I was
held back by the dress and dear old Tiger whined, jumping up, licking my
face and hands and pulling me back from the water. This is the last I
remember until I felt the warm sunshine upon my face and old dog Tiger
was lying beside me. When he felt me move he began to whine and lick my
hands. I had no recollection of time any more as Tiger and I wandered
about through the woods. I ate berries and drank from the lake. All the
food I had was what my dog brought me. Bread crusts and meat bones. At
last my dumb sister found me by watching Tiger and following him. I knew
Nellie, although I was in a very weak condition. She tried her best to
get me home with her, but I would not go.
Just about the time all this happened to me Nellie's deaf and dumb
husband had come to the island on a steamboat. He had not come with the
rest of us, and since we came he had fallen heir to considerable money
and had come to claim Nellie and the children. They had gone to
housekeeping in a little log cabin built in a secluded spot on the edge
of the heavy woods. The little home was not yet finished. Nellie by her
dumb language made me understand John had come and brought letters from
the old home. She made me promise I would wait until she came back with
John and the letters. In a short time they came. When he saw me it was
terrible to look upon his silent rage. He foamed at the mouth and stuck
his knife into the earth, but he could make no sound. He passed his hand
over my hair. It was white as snow. It was auburn in color when I left
my home. I did rouse up a little when I watched the tears roll down his
cheeks. Nellie put a dress on me and a shawl. My bare feet were cut and
swollen. They both helped me to walk; I was too weak to walk alone. At
the last John carried me in his arms to his home. Nellie made me
understand that I had been over three weeks in the woods and by the
king's orders no one had dared openly to hunt for me or give me aid in
any way, claiming that was the way to subdue an unruly spirit. It was
told me that he who once had been my loved husband never made an effort
to find me, not even my own father and mother. Strang called all this
"Divine Revelation." Oh he was more cruel than the grave to me.
From the time I entered John's home my three dumb friends never left me.
It was a hard struggle for life with me. I saw no one and none ever came
to see us. The dear children kept me alive with their sweet, childish
prattle. At that time Strang's rule was absolute. None would have dared
to give me aid. Many were living a double life, seemingly good Mormons,
but only waiting for an opportunity to get away. Strang had enemies that
would strike hard when the time came. Not long after I went to Nellie's
he that I once called husband, watched and shot my faithful dog Tiger.
Then I was roused. All the demons in me came to the surface. I could not
keep quiet any longer. I got well as fast as possible and caused the
King and Mr. H---- all the trouble I could.
The people were divided, not all were pleased with the king and his
rule. The Gentiles were leaving as fast as they could, as there was no
safety for them or their property. Strang was losing much control of his
people. Then he concluded to extend his territory to the mainland,
Charlevoix and Bower's Harbor in Grand Traverse. Some had gone to Fox
Island. About this time Nellie's husband died very sudden. We never knew
the cause of his death. Nellie with her children went with me to
Charlevoix, staying there all winter, then went to Bower's Harbor. That
winter in Charlevoix we almost starved before spring came. The snow was
very deep and ice heavy in the lake. The latter part of March teams came
over from Beaver Island on the ice, bringing us provisions. They also
went to Fox Island, as the people there were in a starving condition.
This was not done by any of Strang's orders. There were some good people
who knew our provisions could not last us till the opening of navigation
and they came without orders and saved our lives from starvation. "Now
do you wonder I am glad of Strang's death?"
The story was a sad one, but true. It had not been all pleasure in
Strang's kingdom. The doctrine they believed in and practiced beyond
limit stifled all the good there was in their hearts. There was no pity
felt or shown to those who went contrary to the "Divine Revelations"
which their king was supposed to have. Poor, deluded people, how
different would all have been for them had their leader used his
splendid talent for good and taught his people the way of life and
truth.