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Here I am once more at Ascot--beloved of Women and Milliners!
_Ascot_, I mean, not _myself_, as I'm thankful to say women don't
like me--Milliners don't count as women, of course, being so very
liberal-minded; and that's the advantage of being "somebody," and
having a figure--you can get all your gowns on the condition of
telling everyone (in strict confidence) who "built" them! I had a
most fatiguing day yesterday, as, after arriving, I had to show the
Baroness all my Ascot "confections," and I made the poor dear quite
jealous, which, of _course_, vexed me, as she is quite my dearest
friend! I was much gratified to see my protest against these
"glove contests" so admirably and cleverly "seconded" (I'm afraid
that's a fighting expression) by one of your wonderful Artists in
Black-and-White (black and blue it might have well been on this
occasion)--though, by the way, he must have been present himself, or
he wouldn't have seen how ashamed of his own face every man was! We
shall have the dear wretches wearing veils next, I suppose!
On every hand I hear great complaints of the "moderate lot"
our English Three-year-olds have turned out; and the Vicomte DE
FOSSE-TERRE (a descendant of the historical QUEEN OF NAVARRE) quite
upset our dinner-party last night by claiming immense superiority
for the French horses of the same age--why should this be?--I don't
consider the French ahead of us in politeness, so why should they be
so in breeding? However, the fact remains, that no English Horse will
run in the French Derby this year!
Lord STONEHENGE tells me we may expect the "Dissolution" very shortly,
and I'm sure the poor Members must be glad of it, for this weather
makes one long to dissolve--though I must say it seems to me an absurd
time to choose, as it will stop the Season and upset everybody's
arrangements! These things will be better managed when we get a "House
of Peeresses" at the head of affairs--and _that_ is only a question of
time, I feel sure!
But now to glance at the Ascot Programme--it is such a lengthy and
important one, that a mere glance will be quite sufficient for me,
whereas a _man_ would study the thing for a week and then know nothing
about it! I will just mention a few horses that my readers will do
well to "keep their eye on," that is if they can--for really at Ascot
one does not pay much attention to the races--and in conclusion I
will give my "one-horse selection" for the _last_ in the Gold Cup. The
expression "one-horsed," is, I believe, generally used contemptuously,
but it must serve till I find time to think out another, which is
impossible at present, as the luncheon-gong has just sounded, and
I have visions of a lobster-salad and iced Hock-Cup! And now to
prophesy? On the "_Queen's Birthday_" a "_Sprightly_" "_Buccaneer_"
gave an "_Order_" to attack "_Harfleur_", captured the town, and at
the end of the "_Comedy_" paid the "_Bill_!"
Yours devotedly,
LADY GAY.