ONTARIO MOGGS.
On the following morning Ralph Newton was in Conduit Street exactly
at the hour named. He had not even then made up his mind;--but he
thought that he might get an extension of the time allowed him for
decision. After all, it was hardly a month yet since the proposition
was made to him. He found Mr. Neefit in the back shop, measuring a
customer. "I'll be with you in two minutes," said Mr. Neefit, just
putting his head through the open door, and then going back to his
work; "3--1--1/8, Waddle; Sir George isn't quite as stout as he was
last year. Oh, no, Sir George; we won't tie you in too tight. Leave
it to us, Sir George. The last pair too tight? Oh, no; I think not,
Sir George. Perhaps your man isn't as careful in cleaning as he ought
to be. Gentlemen's servants do get so careless, it quite sickens
one!" So Mr. Neefit went on, and as Sir George was very copious in
the instructions which he had to give,--all of which, by-the-bye,
were absolutely thrown away,--Ralph Newton became tired of waiting.
He remembered too that he was not there as a customer, but almost
as a member of the family, and the idea sickened him. He bethought
himself that on his first visit to Conduit Street he had seen his
Polly in the shop, cutting up strips wherewith her father would
measure gentlemen's legs. She must then have been nearly fifteen, and
the occupation, as he felt, was not one fitting for the girl who was
to be his wife. "Now, Mr. Newton," said Mr. Neefit, as Sir George at
last left the little room. The day was hot, and Mr. Neefit had been
at work in his shirt sleeves. Nor did he now put on his coat. He
wiped his brow, put his cotton handkerchief inside his braces, and
shook hands with our hero. "Well, Mr. Newton," he said, "what do you
think of it? I couldn't learn much about it, but it seemed to me that
you and Polly got on famous that night. I thought we'd have seen you
out there again before this."
"I couldn't come, Mr. Neefit, as long as there was a doubt."
"Oh, as to doubts,--doubts be bothered. Of course you must run your
chance with Polly like any other man."
"Just so."
"But the way to get a girl like that isn't not to come and see her
for a month. There are others after our Polly, I can tell you;--and
men who would take her with nothing but her smock on."
"I'm quite sure of that. No one can see her without admiring her."
"Then what's the good of talking of doubts? I like you because you
are a gentleman;--and I can put you on your legs, which, from all I
hear, is a kind of putting you want bad enough just at present. Say
the word, and come down to tea this evening."
"The fact is, Mr. Neefit, this is a very serious matter."
"Serious! Twenty thousand pounds is serious. There ain't a doubt
about that. If you mean to say you don't like the bargain,"--and
as he said this there came a black cloud upon Mr. Neefit's
brow,--"you've only got to say the word. Our Polly is not to be
pressed upon any man. But don't let's have any shilly-shallying."
"Tell me one thing, Mr. Neefit."
"Well;--what's that?"
"Have you spoken to your daughter about this?"
Mr. Neefit was silent for a moment, "Well, no; I haven't," he said.
"But, I spoke to her mother, and women is always talking. Mind,
I don't know what our Polly would say to you, but I do think she
expects something. There's a chap lives nigh to us who used always to
be sneaking round; but she has snubbed him terribly this month past.
So my wife tells me. You come and try, Mr. Newton, and then you'll
know all about it."
Ralph was aware that he had not as yet begun to explain his
difficulty to the anxious father. "You see, Mr. Neefit," he
said,--and then he paused. It had been much easier for him to talk to
Sir Thomas than to the breaches-maker.
"If you don't like it,--say so," said Mr. Neefit;--"and don't let us
have no shilly-shallying."
"I do like it."
"Then give us your hand, and come out this evening and have a bit
of some'at to eat and a drop of some'at hot, and pop the question.
That's about the way to do it."
"Undoubtedly;--but marriage is such a serious thing!"
"So it is serious,--uncommon serious to owe a fellow a lot of money
you can't pay him. I call that very serious."
"Mr. Neefit, I owe you nothing but what I can pay you."
"You're very slow about it, Mr. Newton; that's all I can say. But I
wasn't just talking of myself. After what's passed between you and me
I ain't going to be hard upon you."
"I'll tell you what, Mr. Neefit," said Ralph at last,--"of course you
can understand that a man may have difficulties with his family."
"Because of my being a breeches-maker?" said Neefit contemptuously.
"I won't say that; but there may be difficulties."
"Twenty thousand pounds does away with a deal of them things."
"Just so;--but as I was saying, you can understand that there may be
family difficulties. I only say that because I ought perhaps to have
given you an answer sooner. I won't go down with you this evening."
"You won't?"
"Not to-night;--but I'll be with you on Saturday evening, if that
will suit you."
"Come and have a bit of dinner again on Sunday," said Neefit. Ralph
accepted the invitation, shook hands with Neefit, and escaped from
the shop.
When he thought of it all as he went to his rooms, he told himself
that he had now as good as engaged himself to Polly;--as good or as
bad. Of course, after what had passed, he could not go to the house
again without asking her to be his wife. Were he to do so Neefit
would be justified in insulting him. And yet when he undertook to
make this fourth visit to the cottage, he had done so with the
intention of allowing himself a little more time for judgment. He saw
plainly enough that he was going to allow himself to drift into this
marriage without any real decision of his own. He prided himself on
being strong, and how could any man be more despicably weak than
this? It was, indeed, true that in all the arguments he had used with
Sir Thomas he had defended the Neefit marriage as though it was the
best course he could adopt;--and even Sir Thomas had not ultimately
ventured to oppose it. Would it not be as well for him to consider
that he had absolutely made up his mind to marry Polly?
On the Friday he called at Mr. Moggs's house; Mr. Moggs senior was
there, and Mr. Moggs junior, and also a shopman. "I was sorry," said
he, "that when your son called, I had friends with me, and could
hardly explain circumstances."
"It didn't signify at all," said Moggs junior.
"But it does signify, Mr. Newton," said Moggs senior, who on this
morning was not in a good humour with his ledger. "Two hundred and
seventeen pounds, three shillings and four-pence is a good deal of
money for boots, Mr. Newton, You must allow that."
"Indeed it is, Mr. Moggs."
"There hasn't been what you may call a settlement for years.
Twenty-five pounds paid in the last two years!" and Mr. Moggs as he
spoke had his finger on the fatal page. "That won't do, you know,
Mr. Newton;--that won't do at all!" Mr. Moggs, as he looked into his
customer's face, worked himself up into a passion. "But I suppose you
have come to settle it now, Mr. Newton?"
"Not exactly at this moment, Mr. Moggs."
"It must be settled very soon, Mr. Newton;--it must indeed. My son
can't be calling on you day after day, and all for nothing. We can't
stand that you know, Mr. Newton. Perhaps you'll oblige me by saying
when it will be settled." Then Ralph explained that he had called
for that purpose, that he was making arrangements for paying all his
creditors, and that he hoped that Mr. Moggs would have his money
within three months at the farthest. Mr. Moggs then proposed that he
should have his customer's bill at three months, and the interview
ended by the due manufacture of a document to that effect. Ralph,
when he entered the shop, had not intended to give a bill; but the
pressure had been too great upon him, and he had yielded. It would
matter little, however, if he married Polly Neefit. And had he not
now accepted it as his destiny that he must marry Polly Neefit?
The Saturday he passed in much trouble of spirit, and with many
doubts; but the upshot of it all was that he would keep his
engagement for the Sunday. His last chance of escape would have been
to call in Conduit Street on the Saturday and tell Mr. Neefit, with
such apologies as he might be able to make, that the marriage would
not be suitable. While sitting at breakfast he had almost resolved to
do this;--but when five o'clock came, after which, as he well knew,
the breeches-maker would not be found, no such step had been taken.
He dined that evening and went to the theatre with Lieutenant Cox.
At twelve they were joined by Fooks and another gay spirit, and they
eat chops and drank stout and listened to songs at Evans's till near
two. Cox and Fooks said that they had never been so jolly in their
lives;--but Ralph,--though he eat and drank as much and talked more
than the others,--was far from happy. There came upon him a feeling
that after to-morrow he would never again be able to call himself
a gentleman. Who would associate with him after he had married
the breeches-maker's daughter? He laid in bed late on Sunday, and
certainly went to no place of worship. Would it not be well even yet
to send a letter down to Neefit, telling him that the thing could not
be? The man would be very angry with him, and would have great cause
to be angry. But it would at least be better to do this now than
hereafter. But when four o'clock came no letter had been sent.
Punctually at five the cab set him down at Alexandrina Cottage. How
well he seemed to know the place;--almost as well as though he were
already one of the family. He was shown into the drawing-room, and
whom should he see there, seated with Mr. and Mrs. and Miss Neefit,
but Ontario Moggs. It was clear enough that each of the party was ill
at ease. Neefit welcomed him with almost boisterous hospitality. Mrs.
Neefit merely curtseyed and bobbed at him. Polly smiled, and shook
hands with him, and told him that he was welcome;--but even Polly was
a little beside herself. Ontario Moggs stood bolt upright and made
him a low bow, but did not attempt to speak.
"I hope your father is well," said Ralph, addressing himself to Moggs
junior.
"Pretty well, I thank you," said Mr. Moggs, getting up from his chair
and bowing a second time.
Mr. Neefit waited for a moment or two during which no one except
Ralph spoke a word, and then invited his intended son-in-law to
follow him into the garden. "The fact is," said Neefit winking, "this
is Mrs. N.'s doing. It don't make any difference, you know."
"I don't quite understand," said Ralph.
"You see we've known Onty Moggs all our lives, and no doubt he has
been sweet upon Polly. But Polly don't care for him, mind you. You
ask her. And Mrs. N. has got it into her head that she don't want you
for Polly. But I do, Mr. Newton;--and I'm master."
"I wouldn't for the world make a family quarrel."
"There won't be no quarrelling. It's I as has the purse, and it's the
purse as makes the master, Mr. Newton. Don't you mind Moggs. Moggs is
very well in his way, but he ain't going to have our Polly. Well;--he
come down here to-day, just by chance;--and what did Mrs. N. do
but ask him to stop and eat a bit of dinner! It don't make any
difference, you know. You come in now, and just go on as though Moggs
weren't there. You and Polly shall have it all to yourselves this
evening."
Here was a new feature added to the pleasures of his courtship! He
had a rival,--and such a rival;--his own bootmaker, whom he could
not pay, and whose father had insulted him a day or two since.
Moggs junior would of course know why his customer was dining at
Alexandrina Cottage, and would have his own feelings, too, upon the
occasion.
"Don't you mind him,--no more than nothing," said Neefit, leading the
way back into the drawing-room, and passing at the top of the kitchen
stairs the young woman with the bit of salmon.
The dinner was not gay. In the first place, Neefit and Mrs. Neefit
gave very explicit and very opposite directions as to the manner in
which their guests were to walk in to dinner, the result of which
was that Ralph was obliged to give his arm to the elder lady, while
Ontario carried off the prize. Mrs. Neefit also gave directions as
to the places, which were obeyed in spite of an attempt of Neefit's
to contravene them. Ontario and Polly sat on one side of the table,
while Ralph sat opposite to them. Neefit, when he saw that the
arrangement was made and could not be altered, lost his temper and
scolded his wife. "Law, papa, what does it matter?" said Polly.
Polly's position certainly was unpleasant enough; but she made head
against her difficulties gallantly. Ontario, who had begun to guess
the truth, said not a word. He was not, however, long in making up
his mind that a personal encounter with Mr. Ralph Newton might be
good for his system. Mrs. Neefit nagged at her husband, and told
him when he complained about the meat, that if he would look after
the drinkables that would be quite enough for him to do. Ralph
himself found it to be impossible even to look as though things
were going right. Never in his life had he been in a position so
uncomfortable,--or, as he thought, so disreputable. It was not to
be endured that Moggs, his bootmaker, should see him sitting at the
table of Neefit, his breeches-maker.
The dinner was at last over, and the port-wine was carried out into
the arbour;--not, on this occasion, by Polly, but by the maid. Polly
and Mrs. Neefit went off together, while Ralph crowded into the
little summer-house with Moggs and Neefit. In this way half an hour
was passed,--a half hour of terrible punishment. But there was worse
coming. "Mr. Newton," said Neefit, "I think I heard something about
your taking a walk with our Polly. If you like to make a start of it,
don't let us keep you. Moggs and I will have a pipe together."
"I also intend to walk with Miss Neefit," said Ontario, standing up
bravely.
[Illustration: "I also intend to walk with Miss Neefit," said
Ontario, standing up bravely.]
"Two's company and three's none," said Neefit.
"No doubt," said Ontario; "no doubt. I feel that myself. Mr. Newton,
I've been attached to Miss Neefit these two years. I don't mind
saying it out straight before her father. I love Miss Neefit! I don't
know, sir, what your ideas are; but I love Miss Neefit! Perhaps, sir,
your ideas may be money;--my ideas are a pure affection for that
young lady. Now, Mr. Newton, you know what my ideas are." Mr. Moggs
junior was standing up when he made this speech, and, when he had
completed it, he looked round, first upon her father and then upon
his rival.
"She's never given you no encouragement," said Neefit. "How dare you
speak in that way about my Polly?"
"I do dare," said Ontario. "There!"
"Will you tell Mr. Newton that she ever gave you any encouragement?"
Ontario thought about it for a moment, before he replied. "No;--I
will not," said he. "To say that of any young woman wouldn't be in
accord with my ideas."
"Because you can't. It's all gammon. She don't mean to have him, Mr.
Newton. You may take my word for that. You go in and ask her if she
do. A pretty thing indeed! I can't invite my friend, Mr. Newton, to
eat a bit of dinner, and let him walk out with my Polly, but you must
interfere. If you had her to-morrow you wouldn't have a shilling with
her."
"I don't want a shilling with her!" said Ontario, still standing upon
his legs. "I love her. Will Mr. Newton say as fair as that?"
Mr. Newton found it very difficult to say anything. Even had he been
thoroughly intent on the design of making Polly his wife, he could
not have brought himself to declare his love aloud, as had just
been done by Mr. Moggs. "This is a sort of matter that shouldn't be
discussed in public," he said at last.
"Public or private, I love her!" said Ontario Moggs with his hand on
his heart.
Polly herself was certainly badly treated among them. She got no walk
that evening, and received no assurance of undying affection either
from one suitor or the other. It became manifest even to Neefit
himself that the game could not be played out on this evening. He
could not turn Moggs off the premises, because his wife would have
interfered. Nor, had he done so, would it have been possible, after
such an affair to induce Polly to stir from the house. She certainly
had been badly used among them; and so she took occasion to tell her
father when the visitors were both gone. They left the house together
at about eight, and Polly at that time had not reappeared. Moggs went
to the nearest station of the Midland Railway, and Ralph walked to
the Swiss Cottage. Certainly Mr. Neefit's little dinner had been
unsuccessful; but Ralph Newton, as he went back to London, was almost
disposed to think that Providence had interposed to save him.
"I'll tell you what it is, father," said Polly to her papa, as soon
as the two visitors had left the house, "if that's the way you are
going to go on, I'll never marry anybody as long as I live."
"My dear, it was all your mother," said Mr. Neefit. "Now wasn't it
all your mother? I wish she'd been blowed fust!"