[118] _Kruptadia_: Heilbronn: Henninger Frères, 1883: vol. 1: _Secret
Stories from the Russian_.
An old man had a son, a fine lad. Another old man had a daughter, a
marriageable girl. They pictured these two young ones married.
“Ivanouchka,” said the father, “I desire thee to marry the daughter of
our neighbour; approach her and discourse gently and courteously with
her.”
“Machoutka,” said the other old man, “I would give thee in marriage to
the son of our neighbour; seek to meet him and have pleasant converse
with him.”
These two young persons met in the street and greeted each other.
“Ivanouchka,” quoth the young girl, “my father hath bade me have
pleasant discourse with thee.”
“My father hath instructed me likewise,” answered the youth.
“What shall we do? Where sleepest thou, Ivanouchka?”
“In the hay.”
“As for me,” quoth the girl, “I sleep in the coach-house. Come this
night to me, and we will hold pleasant converse together.”
Thus it was. During the night Ivanouchka went and lay down with
Machoutka.
“Camest thou by the threshing-floor?” asked she.
“Yea. Hast thou seen the heap of dung?”
“I have seen it.”
“What shall we do now?”[119]
[119] The young people are obviously nervous, and are making
conversation.
“I must see if thou hast a good instrument.”
“Come, look,” said he, and undid his drawers. “Behold my riches!”
“‘Tis too big for me! See how small is mine!”
“Let me see if mine will go in.”
And the youth set himself to make the trial; his yard rose up erect
like a stake, and when he thrust it in, the young girl cried with all
her might:
“Ah! that hurteth me! How it biteth!”
“Have no fear. My yard hath not sufficient room; for that reason it is
so angry.”
“I told thee that there was not sufficient space for it.”
“Wait--it will stretch.”
Anon, when he made her to feel much pleasure, she said to him:
“Ah! my little heart! Thy riches are indeed worth much money.”
They performed and fell asleep.
But the girl awoke during the night, and kissed the backside of the
young man, which she took for his face. He let her do this to satiety,
and the girl said to him:
“Knowest thou, Vania, that thou smellest most scurvily!”