When Sophy went to Cecil's room, he was lying back quietly reading. He
put down his book as she entered, and smiled at her. It was his own,
good smile--the smile that she remembered far back in their lover-days.
Tears rushed to her eyes. She was not a woman who wept easily; but now,
to see his face so purified of poison, to meet the smile that also shone
in the eyes--that glimpse of a resurrected soul in the face that had so
long been but a blurred mask of exotic passions--this brought her tears.
She went over, kneeled down beside him, and laid her face to his.
"I've got you back!" she whispered. "You've come back to me!"
He lay still, stroking her hair, kissing it, looking out over her head
at the flicker of leaves beyond his window, at the dim green of
air-veiled pastures, and the far-away blur of brownish haze that hung
over the mining town, chief source of the Wychcote riches. A bird
streaked like a black arrow against the faint blue sky. The weather had
cleared within the last few days. There was sunshine, pale but
plenteous--filtering through a veil of moony clouds. A sort of
eclipse-light, it seemed to Sophy; but she welcomed it for Bobby's
sake--the child had been fretting at the prolonged rain. He had lost his
sturdy, lady-apple cheeks. Now he could be out all day pottering at the
out-of-door things that children love.
She knelt there with her cheek against her husband's, just resting, soul
and body. She was too tired with the long strain to vibrate to a keener
joy. Her thankfulness was deep rather than exultant. And Chesney, gazing
out at the summer landscape, thought:
"After all--what if I go on with it? I'm lower than brutes if I deceive
her."
Weariness and a distaste of life crept over him at the mere thought of
keeping up the dreadful, nerve-wearing effort.
"I must. There's no way out of it--with decency," said part of him.
"Fate's against me," said another part. "Why was the little Bush-Ranger
whipped away like that, if there are gods that care? It's too much to
ask a man to keep up alone. I'm sickening for the stuff this moment.
Between the lips of this woman--beautiful as she is--and one grain of
morphia--would I hesitate?" "No," answered the first self, grimly
honest. "You wouldn't. Try to tell her you have the stuff at hand. Give
it up to her. You won't. You can't."
"I _will_!" he thought, setting his teeth.
She felt the swell of his cheek-muscles as he did so, and looked up.
"Sophy...." he said; then stopped short.
"What is it, dear?" she asked. "Can I do something for you?"
He continued looking at her an instant, then closed his eyes.
"No," he said.
She thought his expression had been strange. It hurt her. It was as if
he _had_ wanted something, but did not dare ask her for it. She flushed
suddenly--it was for him she flushed. She thought that he had been about
to coax her for the morphia before the time for giving it. Was he going
to "try it on with her," as little Anne had feared? Her limbs seemed to
turn to water at the mere thought of that possible struggle.
But he said quietly the next moment:
"Sophy, the little Harding says that she'll come back here, when her
mother is well enough. That being so, I want to ask you a favour."
"Yes--do!" she said eagerly.
"I want to ask you to take me in hand yourself. You have all the--the
stuff." The lie choked him somehow. He hastened to correct its
literalness though not its import. "I mean nurse said that she was going
to turn it over to you."
"Yes--I have it," said Sophy. Why should her heart beat so? He was only
asking her to do what Anne had asked her.
"Well, then, there _is_ something you can do for me--you can spare me
the humiliation of having some strange wench pottering about, and
bulldozing me with her dirty little professional airs and graces. If
you'll take me in hand yourself, and spare me that, you'll find me
amenable. Will you? Wait a moment," he added, before she could answer.
"It's only fair to give you warning that I will _not_ submit in any case
to having another of these hussies round me. The Harding was bad enough,
but I've got used to her--I rather like her--tough little specimen! She
amuses me. But another--I'll wring her neck before I'll submit to it!
That's my last word on the subject."
* * * * *
Bellamy was much perturbed at this fiat of Chesney. Yet, when he had
thought over it a while, realising the stubborn fixedness of the man's
will and fearing to irritate him unnecessarily, he came to the
conclusion that it was not so dangerous a situation as he had at first
thought. He could trust Sophy, he felt sure, not to be moved by any
pleading on the part of her husband. All the morphia was now in her
possession. There was no other possible means by which Chesney could
obtain the drug. All parcels were opened by Mrs. Chesney or his mother.
Besides, Chesney wrote no letters. He seemed perfectly indifferent about
the post. Such letters as did come for him only bored him. They were all
answered by his wife and Gaynor. Then, too, it was a great concession on
Chesney's part to be willing for Anne Harding's return.
When after two days she wrote that her mother had passed the crisis and
was rapidly improving, that she (Anne) hoped to be able to return to
Dynehurst within three weeks, he felt quite reconciled to the present
arrangement. Sophy reported that Chesney never asked for a dose before
the regular hours, or for an increase of the amount. She, too, was
cheered and hopeful.
For a week this happy state of things lasted. Then one morning, after
his daily visit to Chesney's room, Bellamy came to her with an harassed
face.
"Mrs. Chesney," he said, "don't take it too hard--but your husband has
got hold of morphia in some way. The symptoms are marked this morning.
It's inconceivable, I know; but there's the fact."
Sophy's air-castle broke in upon her in smothering vapours. She sank
down on the nearest chair, and gazed out before her with blank eyes.
"Are you sure?" she asked mechanically, after a moment.
"Quite sure."
"Since when?"
"Only recently--during the night, probably. But the eyes show it
unmistakably--and the dryness of the mucous membrane."
"I know," said Sophy. So well she knew that she felt as if her own mouth
were like an ash, merely from her vivid realisation of the doctor's
words.
"Have you taxed him with it?" she then asked.
"Yes. He only jeers. Asks me how he could have got it--says that he's
not a wizard. It's terrible, Mrs. Chesney, terrible! If Nurse Harding
were only here!"
"Yes. It seems as if Fate were against him."
"Fate!" cried Bellamy. "Himself, you mean! How he could descend to this
when----"
He broke off abruptly, shocked by the white hopelessness of the young
face.
"Forgive me," he said. "Besides, one should never judge too harshly in
these cases. I've heard of men, anxious to be cured, getting well over
the cursed thing, getting quite free of it for as much as a year, then,
in some sudden moment of weakness, returning to it."
Suddenly a vigorous, alert look replaced Sophy's passive expression. She
stood up, facing the perturbed physician.
"What must we do?" she asked. "I am ready to do anything to save him.
Anything that I may do with self-respect--anything that will not put my
boy in danger. Explain to me. Whatever it is, I will do it--if it is in
my power."
She shone white and vivid against the grey, rain-strung frame of the
hall window. She dazzled there in the dark, grim hall, flashing
something free and Amazonian into the staid discreetness of the sober,
conventional house. Bellamy watched her, without being quite able to
translate into clear thought the impression that she produced on him at
that moment.
She put it into words for him herself: "I mean that I will fight for him
like a comrade--not like a submissive wife--a slave," she said.
She stood for a moment looking down at her shoe-tip which she moved
slightly to and fro. Then she said abruptly:
"How is my boy? Does his paleness mean that he is not well really--or is
it only a passing thing?"
"No, no," he hastened to reassure her. "The boy feels the confinement of
the house, of course, but a week of sunny weather would have him right
as a trivet."
"And if it keeps on raining?"
"I hardly think it will. We are nearly in July now. Rainy Junes are
frequent in England, you know; but July is apt to show some fine
weather."
"But in case it does not?" she persisted.
"Then I think a little outing to the Isle of Wight or the south of
France might be the thing."
She pondered this.
"I see," she said at last. "And will you promise to tell me, the moment
that you think Bobby needs such a change?"
"I do, indeed," he replied earnestly.
"Thank you. Now I feel free to give all my attention to my husband--for
the present. I shall go to him myself now. It seems to me the last hope
that we have."
"You mean that you will try to persuade him to--to--er--be frank with
you?"
"Yes."
Bellamy looked at her in genuine distress.
"I'm afraid you must prepare yourself for disappointment, Mrs. Chesney."
"I am prepared for it," she said. Her voice was grave, but under the
gravity there was depth on depth of bitterness.
"Well--God be with you!" said Bellamy, with much feeling.
"Thank you," she said gently.
She passed out of his sight, going upstairs towards her husband's room.