If I'm drafted I shall RESIGN.
Deeply grateful for the onexpected honor thus confered upon me
I shall feel compeld to resign the position in favor of sum
more worthy person. Modesty is what ails me. That's what's
kept me under.
I meanter-say, I shall hav to resign if I'm drafted
everywheres I've bin inrold. I must now, furrinstuns, be
inrold in upards of 200 different towns. If I'd kept on
travelin' I should hav eventooaly becum a Brigade, in which
case I could have held a meetin' and elected myself Brigadeer-
ginral quite unanimiss. I hadn't no idea there was so many of
me before. But, serisly, I concluded to stop exhibitin', and
made tracks for Baldinsville.
My only daughter threw herself onto my boosum, and said, "It
is me fayther! I thank the gods!"