Under the title "With My Neighbors" Mrs. Sangster has gathered a number
of plain talks to plain people on familiar and homely subjects. Making
no attempt at literary excellence, these chapters are simply intimate
and confidential colloquies with women, younger and older, their aim
being to uplift and encourage the weary, comfort the sorrowful, and give
an impulse towards the better life.
_BY THE SAME AUTHOR:_
_On the Road Home._ Poems. Illustrated. 16mo, Cloth, $1.25.
_Little Knights and Ladies._ Poems. Illustrated. 16mo, Cloth, $1.25.
_Home Fairies and Heart Flowers._ Verses by Mrs. SANGSTER, Engravings by
FRANK FRENCH. Illustrated. 4to, Cloth, $6.00.
* * * * *
OTHER RECENT BOOKS
=FOR KING OR COUNTRY.= A Story of the American Revolution. By JAMES
BARNES. Illustrated. Post 8vo, Cloth, Ornamental, $1.50.
=OAKLEIGH.= By ELLEN DOUGLAS DELAND. Illustrated. Post 8vo, Cloth,
Ornamental, $1.25.
=AFLOAT WITH THE FLAG.= By W. J. HENDERSON, Author of "Sea Yarns for
Boys," etc. Illustrated. Post 8vo, Cloth, Ornamental, $1.25.
=TOMMY TODDLES.= By ALBERT LEE. Illustrated by PETER S. NEWELL. Square
16mo, Cloth, Ornamental, $1.25.
=A LIFE OF CHRIST FOR YOUNG PEOPLE,= In Questions and Answers. By MARY
HASTINGS FOOTE. With Map. Post 8vo, Cloth, Ornamental, $1.25.
=THE STORY OF BABETTE,= A Little Creole Girl. By RUTH MCENERY STUART.
Illustrated. Post 8vo, Cloth, Ornamental, $1.50.
* * * * *
HARPER & BROTHERS, Publishers, New York.
* * * * *
[Illustration: HE STIRRED THINGS UP.]
* * * * *
A MATTER OF STORIES.
"My uncle Jim," said Hal, "is building a house six stories high."
"That's nothin'," said Frankie. "My uncle George is writing a book ten
stories long."
* * * * *
THE FIRST STEP.
"I suppose, Jacky," said the visitor to the little four-year-old, "that
you will be going into business soon?"
"I'm going into pants first," said Jacky.
* * * * *
On one of the tram-cars that climb the hills in the streets of the
little mountain town of D----, the driver is a quaint old man full of
interesting and humorous characteristics. In the course of conversation
with a passenger the other day he remarked that he and his mule had been
working steadily for the company for ten years, and that's a long time.
"Yes, it is," replied the passenger; "and surely the company must think
a good deal of you both to keep you so long."
"Well, I've done honest work, and they know that, but I'm doubtful about
how much they think of us. It was only the other day that the mule took
sick, and the company got a doctor for the mule, and docked me for the
time I lost. I dun'no', though; guess it was all right. Getting off
here? Well, good-day, sir."
* * * * *
George Washington Jones, a colored gentleman, was sad, very sad. He was
a kalsominer when he had work to do, but, as he expresses it,
"Dem dere white trash hab gone into de trade, an' now Ise got no work to
do." But this was not what made him sad. "Dis yere life," he said, "am
not wuth livin'."
"What's the matter, George," inquired his friend.
"Why, Ise got a little money on dat last job, an' Ise went round to
settle de bills Ise owed."
"Didn't you attend to it all right?"
"Dat's de strange part of it. De butcher he wuz out, an' de grocer he
wuz out, an' every one Ise wanted ter pay wuz out, an' den what'd I do
but lose dat money."
"Well, that was unlucky, and no mistake; but still you showed your good
intentions, and no doubt they won't press their claims."
"Press dere claims! Yah, dat's de trouble. When Ise got 'ome Ise found
ebery one of dem waitin' to press dere claims, an' as Ise couldn't fix
dem, dey done an' fixed me."
* * * * *
A STRIKING LIKENESS.
Miss Susan is an exceedingly refined young lady who has seen some five
summers. She is full of airs and of graces, reserved, self-contained,
and decidedly uppish. She cut her uncle dead in the street one day, and
when he reproached her for her extreme hauteur, she said, with her most
pronounced society manner,
"Oh, I saw you, uncle, but I thought it was auntie!"
* * * * *
There is an Irish porter employed in a large commission house in New
York, one of the kind that will make a witty reply to any sort of
question. He is very fond of expressing his views in general, and has
great admiration of his arguments. If he fails to get a listener he will
talk to himself in lieu of something better. A member of the firm being
annoyed one day at his constant muttering, which he was unfortunate
enough to hear, sent for him.
"See here, John, did it ever occur to you that your constant talk and
muttering is a great annoyance to people that happen to be around? Why
on earth do you chatter away to yourself, anyhow?"
"Shure I have two reasons fer doin' that."
"Two reasons! Well, what are they?"
"One of them is that I loike ter talk to a sinsible man, and the other
is that I loike ter hear a sinsible man talk."
* * * * *
A RULE THAT DIDN'T WORK BOTH WAYS.
"What's your name?" said the new school-teacher, addressing the first
boy on the bench.
"Jule Simpson," replied the lad.
"Not Jule--Julius," said the teacher. And addressing the next one, "What
is your name?"
"Billious Simpson, I guess."
And the new teacher had to rap for order.
* * * * *
Teddy brought a green caterpillar in from the garden the other day, and
showing it to his mother, he exclaimed, "I've got a big worm, mamma, but
he ain't ripe yet!"
* * * * *
ALFRED'S DISCOVERY.
ALFRED. "This is a funny sort of an ice-cream-freezer, mamma."
MAMMA. "Why so, Alfred?"
ALFRED. "Because it freezes the ice-cream, and then goes and lets it
melt."
* * * * *
BOBBY (_pointing to a fish jumping out of the water_). "Mamma, see that
fish playing leap-frog!"
End of Project Gutenberg's Harper's Round Table, September 1, 1896, by Various