XVIII

"MY DEAR DAVID ROSSI,--You will know all about it before this

letter reaches you. It is one of those scandals of the law that

are telegraphed to every part of the civilised world. Poor Bruno!

Yet no, not poor--great, glorious, heroic Bruno! He ended like an

old Roman, and killed himself rather than betray his friend. When

they played upon his jealousy, and tempted him by a forged

letter, he cried, 'Long live David Rossi!' and died. Oh, it was

wonderful. The memory of that moment will be with me always like

the protecting and strengthening hand of God. I never knew until

to-day what human nature is capable of. It is divine.

"But how mean and little I feel when I think of all I went through

in the court this morning! I was really undergoing the same

tortures as Bruno, the same doubt and the same agony. And even

when I saw through the whole miserable machination of lying and

duplicity I was actually in terror for Bruno lest he should betray

you in the end. Betray you! His voice when he uttered that last

cry rings in my ears still. It was a voice of triumph--triumph

over deception, over temptation, over jealousy, and over self.

"Don't think, David Rossi, that Bruno died of a broken heart, and

don't think he went out of the world believing that you were

false. I feel sure he came to that court with the full intention

of doing what he did. All through the trial there was something in

his bearing which left the impression of a purpose unrevealed.

Everybody felt it, and even the judges ceased to protest against

his outbursts. The poor prisoner in convict clothes, with

dishevelled hair and bare neck, made every one else look paltry

and small. Behind him was something mightier than himself. It was

Death. Then remember his last cry, and ask yourself what he meant

by it. He meant loyalty, love, faith, fidelity. He intended to

say, 'You've beaten me, but no matter; I believe in him, and

follow him to the last.'

"As you see, I am here in your own quarters, but I keep in touch

with 'Sister Angelica,' and still have no answer to my letter. I

invent all manner of excuses to account for your silence. You are

busy, you are on a journey, you are waiting for the right moment

to reply to me at length. If I could only continue to think so,

how happy I should be! But I cannot deceive myself any longer.

"It is perhaps natural that you should find it hard to forgive me,

but you might at least write and put me out of suspense. I think

you would do so if you knew how much I suffer. Your great soul

cannot intend to torture me. To-night the burden of things is

almost more than I can bear, and I am nearly heartbroken. It is my

dark hour, dearest, and if you had to say you could never forgive

me, I think I could easier reconcile myself to that. I have been

so happy since I began to love you; I shall always love you even

if I have to lose you, and I shall never, never be sorry for

anything that has occurred.

"Not receiving any new letters from you, I am going back on the

old ones, and there is a letter of only two months ago in which

you speak of just such a case as mine. May I quote what you say?

"'Yet even if she were not so (i.e. worthy of your love and

friendship), even if there were, as you say, a fault in her, who

am I that I should judge her harshly? ... I reject the monstrous

theory that while a man may redeem the past a woman never can....

And if she has sinned as I have sinned, and suffered as I have

suffered, I will pray for strength to say, 'Because I love her we

are one, and we stand or fall together.'

"It is so beautiful that I am even happy while my pen copies the

sweet, sweet words, and I feel as I did when the old priest spoke

so tenderly on the day I confessed, telling me I had committed no

sin and had nothing to repent of. Have I never told you about

that? My confessor was a Capuchin, and perhaps I should have

waited for his advice before going farther. He was to consult his

General or his Bishop or some one, and to send for me again.

"But all that is over now, and everything depends upon you. In any

case, be sure of one thing, whatever happens. Bruno has taught me

a great lesson, and there is not anything your enemies can do to

me that will touch me now. They have tried me already with

humiliation, with poverty, with jealousy, and even with the shadow

of shame itself. There is nothing left but death. _And death

itself shall find me faithful to the last._ Good-bye! Your poor

unforgiven girl, ROMA."

The morning after writing this letter Roma received a visit from one of

the Noble Guard. It was the Count de Raymond.

"I am sent by the Holy Father," he said, "to say that he wishes to see

you."

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The Eternal City · 第 85 / 155 题