THE LITTLE GIRL GROWN UP
Mrs. Underhill said "No." It was not to be thought of for a moment.
Hanny in short frocks!
"It would have to be made long in the skirt, I suppose," returned Joe,
gravely.
"Long! What are you talking about!"
"She would enjoy seeing the dancing. And when she was an old lady, and
Thackeray dead, she could tell her children she was at a banquet with
the great novelist."
"What nonsense you do talk, Joe."
Doctor Joe laughed, gave his mother a squeeze and a kiss that brought
the bright colour to her cheek, and then went off to comfort two rich
old patients who had nothing the matter with them, except the
infirmities of age. They thought there was no one like Dr. Underhill.
Perhaps his mother thought so, too. She was taking a good deal of
comfort with him in these days, when she had cast Ben a little out of
her good graces. She had a hope that Ben's sturdy common sense would
convince him after a while that Delia would make a poor, improvident
wife. And there was a chance that, while Ben was waiting to get ready,
some one might capture Delia. She sincerely hoped it would be some one
well-to-do and deserving, and who could afford servants and a generous
household expenditure. Ben would get over it in time.
And much as she enjoyed Joe, she wanted him to marry and have a home and
family of his very own. But was any one good enough for such a sweet,
generous, noble soul!
Of course Hanny couldn't go; that was a foregone conclusion. But then
the Jaspers were going, and it wasn't like taking a young girl out in
society. Just one night would not matter. Daisy had been to several
grown-up festivities abroad, where they were ever so much more strenuous
about girls. There would be so many people, they would pass in the
throng unnoticed; and it was not like a public ball.
It was a little odd, but Miss Cynthia settled it finally. Her verdict
seemed to settle a good many things. She did not "dress-make" very
steadily now; but there were some folks who thought they couldn't have a
wedding, or a large party, without Miss Cynthia's advice and assistance.
She came to spend the day. Grandmother Van Kortlandt enjoyed her very
much, as she could not visit a great deal herself. Cynthia always had
the latest news about all the relatives. She gossiped in a bright social
fashion, with no especial ill-nature, or sharp criticism, indeed her
sharpnesses were amusing for the bit of real fun in them.
"Why, of course she ought to go," declared Miss Cynthia. "I'd like to
see the great man myself, and shake hands with him, though I am not over
fond of the English; and I do hope and pray he won't go home and make
fun of us. As for the dancing, and all that, Peggy Underhill, you went
to lots of frolics before you were as old as Hanny, and had young men
beauing you round. I don't see but you have made a good and capable wife
and mother; and it didn't hurt you a bit."
"But I was not going to school."
"It wasn't the fashion then. And now women are in Oberlin College,
studying the same things as the men; and they fall in love and get
married just as they always did. The ball, or whatever you call it,
won't hurt Hanny a bit. There will be the Jaspers, and Joe, and Ben, and
I'm sure that's enough to take care of one little girl."
"She has nothing to wear; she is still in short frocks. And the idea of
buying a ball-dress, that she won't want until next winter!"
"Now see here. Let's look over the old things. There's her blue silk,
outgrown of course. They ruffle everything now, and it will be wide
enough for that. And I can just cover the waist, and ruffle the skirt
with white tarleton. It is nearly two yards wide, and makes lovely
trimming. There's no use saving it up for Stephen's children."
They all laughed at that.
"And, Aunt Marg'ret," to grandmother, "why didn't you keep _your_ little
girl shut up in a band-box, while all the other girls were having good
times and getting lovers? She might have been a queer, particular,
fidgety old maid, instead of having a nice family for us to quarrel
over."
"I will buy her a new dress," said grandmother.
"She doesn't want anything but a few yards of tarleton. She won't be
likely to get into the papers. She and Miss Daisy will sit and look on,
and just whisper to each other, and feel afraid to say their souls are
their own; but they'll enjoy the pretty dressing and the dancing, and
they will see how the thing is done when it comes their turn in good
earnest."
So Mrs. Underhill had to give in. Grandmother slipped five dollars in
Miss Cynthia's hand, as she was going away.
"If that falls short, I'll give you some more. And you just buy that
tarleton."
Hanny wasn't quite sure, and never said a word at school until the very
day. But she and Daisy had a thrill of delight talking it over. Miss
Cynthia came armed with the tarleton. The skirt was let down; but girls'
long dresses were not sweeping length in those days. Then it was covered
with narrow ruffles that suggested drifting clouds over an azure sky.
The bodice was not outgrown, after all. It was covered with the
tarleton, and had a fall of beautiful old lace around the shoulders, a
pretty frill at the neck, and short sleeves. Joe bought her white
gloves, and she had a blue sash.
Miss Cynthia came in to dress her; but the little girl had a quivering
fear that something had happened to her maid, for it was full eight
o'clock. She put her back hair in a French twist, much worn then, with
two big rings right on the top of her head that looked like a crown. Her
front hair she curled over an iron, and then combed it out; and it was a
mass of fluffy waves, gathered in bandeaux just above her ears. She had
her mother's beautiful pearl earrings, that had come from France with
the old French grandmother, and a handsome mother-of-pearl-topped comb
in her hair.
They put on the ball-dress. "Now look at yourself," said Miss Cynthia,
"and get used to it before I let in the folks."
Hanny stood before her mother's tall mirror. Oh, this was Miss Nan
Underhill, and she had never seen her before. There was a mystery about
her,--a sudden sense of a strange, beautiful, unseen world, a new
country she was going into, an old world left behind, an intangible
recreation that no words could explain, but that touched her with a
kind of exalted sacredness, as if a new life was unfolding all about
her. She hardly dared stir or breathe.
"For a girl with no special beauty, I think you look very well. But,
land sakes! You'll see no end of handsome girls; Margaret and Jim
carried off the beauty of this family."
Miss Cynthia's voice recalled her from the vision of coming womanhood,
that she was to live over again on her wedding night, with its holy
blessedness enshrining her within her bridal veil.
Her father's eyes shone with a softness that looked like tears. Her
mother viewed her all over with a critical air.
"I must say, Cynthia, you've done wonderfully. The dress looks very
nice. And now, Hanny, I do hope you won't be forward or silly. Mind
everything Mrs. Jasper says, and don't you and Daisy giggle. Be careful
and don't lose Margaret's handkerchief. I don't just know as you ought
to carry that."
Joe said she was lovely; and Jim really was very complimentary. He _did_
wish that he was going. But Jim counted the cost of everything now, for
he was trying to get out of debt.
The coach came up from the Jaspers' and Hanny was put inside. Joe
insisted on sharing the box with the driver.
When Daisy took off her wrap in the dressing-room, she had on a pale
pink silk. Part of her curls were tied up in a bunch on top of her head,
and fastened with a silver arrow and two roses. She would always wear it
in ringlets, or at least until she was so old she wouldn't mind about
her shoulders being not quite straight.
The affair was a banquet primarily. To be sure they gathered in the
Assembly room; and there was Ben, and Delia, who looked very nice and
bright in maize colour and brown.
"Oh, Hanny, you are as lovely as a picture," she whispered
enthusiastically. "But you _are_ a little mite; there is no denying it.
I was so afraid you couldn't come, that something would happen at the
last moment. Miss Cynthia is capital."
Hanny coloured and almost sighed. She might as well give up hoping to be
tall, and accept the fact.
They went into the banquet-room, where there were two long tables. They
passed around to where a circle of men stood, some of them very fine
looking indeed. The advancing group were presented to the great
novelist, and in future years Hanny was to treasure the cordial smile
and pressure of the hand. But he was to come again when the world had
learned to pay him a finer and more discriminating admiration.
His end of the table was literary. The Jasper party were opposite, at
the other one. What brightness and wit spiced the party, they could
gather from the genial laughter. There were toasts and responses that
scintillated with gaiety and touched the border of pathos.
It was long, and of course the younger people who came for the ball were
not compelled to stay. The novelist was to leave at the close of the
dinner. And presently most of the company found their way to the dancing
room, where the band was discoursing enchanting music, and where every
one enjoyed the promenade.
But when the quadrille sets were formed and in motion, Hanny was
enraptured. Ben and Delia were among them. Delia certainly had a
frivolous side to her nature for a genius. She was very fond of fun and
pleasure and dancing, and had no lack of partners all the evening.
Some there were who danced like a fairy dream; others who made blunders
and gave the wrong hand, and betrayed various awkwardnesses. Doctor Joe
found several lady friends, and danced two or three times, then
proposed that Hanny should try, which he was sure "would inspire Daisy
into making the attempt," he said with a persuasive smile.
Hanny was very much afraid out on the large space. But Delia was in the
same set, and her bright merry eyes were full of encouragement. It was
not alarming. Indeed, in five minutes, the music had put a "spirit in
her feet," and she felt quite at home.
Then a friend of Ben's came to ask her; and Doctor Joe sat down to
persuade Daisy. While abroad, she had taken what we should now term a
series of physical culture lessons to strengthen and develop her limbs,
and to learn how to overcome her misfortune in every possible manner.
Indeed, it was hardly noticeable now, and she had outgrown the
sensitiveness of her childhood.
"Oh, mamma, do you think I could?"
"Of course she can," declared Doctor Joe. "I can't have you playing wall
flower altogether at your first ball. And if you drop down in surprise,
or faint away, I will carry you to the dressing-room at once."
He was so tender and full of nonsense, yet so much in earnest, that she
rose reluctantly. But like Hanny, with the eager joy of youth, she soon
forgot everything except the pure pleasure, and the delight of
gratifying dear Doctor Joe, who was so strong and gentle that she could
not even feel a bit nervous.
As for Hanny, she was really enchanted. The room full of people,
smiling and happy, the changing figures, the light airy dresses, the
shimmer of silks, the cloudlets of lace, the soft flying curls, for so
many people wore ringlets still, the happy smiling faces, and the throb
of the music was intoxicating. It was a strange, delightful world that
she had gone into with her first long gown and her hair done up.
She came back, flushed and excited, her pretty eyes shining, her red
lips all in a quiver.
"Now you must sit down and rest," said Mrs. Jasper. "And if you are very
obedient, you may get up in that Spanish dance. I think that quite
delightful and bewildering."
A lady sat on the other side of Mrs. Jasper, and resumed the incident
she was describing. Mr. Jasper came up with a young man.
"Here is an old friend!" he exclaimed. "Where is Daisy?"
"Somewhere with the Doctor. Oh, what a surprise!" and she took the young
man's hand.
"I wasn't sure I could get here; and it would have been very ungrateful
to Mr. Jasper, when he sent me a ticket. I wanted to see Miss Daisy
again. But I have just come on a flying business tour, and must start
to-morrow for Philadelphia. Still, I may have a little leisure when I
return. What a gay scene."
Hanny sat fanning herself, and feeling that her cheeks were scarlet. If
it only wouldn't culminate in her nose! Then Mr. Jasper turned and
introduced his young friend. Hanny moved a little, so he could sit
between her and Mrs. Jasper,--a very attractive young man, a Mr.
Andersen.
"Miss Underhill," he repeated, as Mr. Jasper turned away, "I've been
speculating on a Miss Underhill for five minutes. I wonder if you will
consider it impertinent; but perhaps you never speculate upon people,
and then it might be reprehensible. Just as I entered the room, there
was a merry group talking, and a sort of 'nut brown mayde,' all in brown
and yellow with bright hair and laughing eyes said, 'Miss Nan
Underhill.' Of course I was too well bred, and in too great a hurry to
listen to any more, or I might have found out about her. I had just an
instant interior gleam of what she must be like with that English name.
And I wonder if the fates have directed my steps to her?"
Mr. Andersen was not the tall, stern, gloomy hero of romance; he was
medium in height and figure, with a frank, eager sort of face, dark
hair, and eyes she thought black then, but afterwards came to know that
they were of the deep blue of a midnight sky in winter. He had such a
smiling mouth, and his voice had a curious, lingering cadence that
suggests that one may have heard it in a previous state.
Hanny caught the spirit of the half badinage, and the laughing light in
his face.
"I think I ought to know the ideal before I confess identity," she
replied.
"Can't I change the ideal? Or repent my vague, wild fancy?"
"Oh, was it wild? Then I must insist upon it. Miss Nan Underhill, an
English girl; of course she was tall, this vision of your imagination?"
Hanny was quite sure her face grew redder. And this ideal girl was
beautiful. Oh, dear!
"Yes, tall; a daughter of the gods, or the old Norse Vikings before they
were Anglicised, with fair hair. And you have the fair hair."
"But I am not tall! I am sorry to have you disappointed."
"I am not disappointed. What does a vagrant fancy amount to? I consider
myself fortunate in meeting Miss Underhill. Why, suppose I had gone
rambling about and missed you altogether? Have you known the Jaspers
long?"
"Oh, years and years. Before they went abroad."
"What a beautiful girl Daisy is! I am glad she is here enjoying herself.
Oh, isn't it the regulation thing to speak of the hero of the feast? Of
course when you heard he was coming to lecture you began to read his
novels--if you had not before."
"I had not read them before. There are a great many books I have not
read. But I tried at 'Vanity Fair;' and I am afraid I don't like it."
"I do not believe you will now. I can't imagine real young people liking
them. But when one has grown older and had sorrow and suffering and
experience, there are so many touches that go to one's heart. And
'Vanity Fair' is a novel without a hero. Still I always feel sorry for
poor Major Dobbins. I wonder if Amelia would have liked him better if
his name had been something else? Could you fall in love with such a
name?"
They both laughed. She raised her eyes. How exquisitely fair and sweet
and dainty she was! The soft hair had shining lights; and her eyes had a
twilight look that suggested a pellucid lake, with evening shades
blowing over it.
"A little more of something would have made him a hero, and spoiled the
book."
"But I don't like Amelia, nor Becky; and the Crawleys are horrid. And
Thackeray seems holding up everybody and laughing at them. I like to
believe in people."
"I am glad there is a time when we can believe in them: it is the
radiant time of youth. What did that little smile hide, and half betray?
Confess!"
"Are you so very old?"
The charming gravity was irresistible.
"Seven and twenty, and I am beginning to worship Thackeray. At seven and
thirty, he will be one of my passions, I know. Now and then I come to a
sentence that goes to my heart. No, do not read him yet awhile, unless
it is some of the little things. There is 'Dr. Birch and his Young
Friends;' and if you want to be amused you must read his continuation of
'Ivanhoe.' But then you will have neither heroines nor heroes left. And
if you and Miss Daisy want to laugh beyond measure, get the 'Rose and
the Ring,' that he wrote for his two little girls."
"Oh," said Hanny, "are they at home, in England?"
"Yes, with an aunt."
"Haven't they any mother?"
"They have no mother," he said gravely.
Years later, the novelist was to be one of the little girl's heroes,
when she knew all the bravery of his life, and why his little girls were
without a mother.
Joe and Daisy returned, and there was a pleasant rencontre; then Delia
and Ben came up, and they had a merry chat and a promenade.
"I wonder," as the musicians began tuning again, "if you are engaged for
all the dances. Could I be allowed one?"
He took up her card.
"I have been dancing so much already; but Mrs. Jasper said I might try
the Spanish dance."
"Oh, then try it with me! I am not too old to dance, if I have come to
adoring Thackeray. And I am to go away soon."
"To go away--where?" And she glanced up with an interest that gave him a
quick sense of pleasure.
"To Hamburg first; then to find some relations."
"In Germany? But you are not a German?" in surprise.
"I ought to be a Dane, if one's birth counts for anything; and if one's
ancestors count, then an old Dutch Knickerbocker," he returned, with a
soft, amused laugh. "But I believe I cannot boast of any English
descent, such as the son of a hundred earls. That doesn't sound as
poetic as the daughter of a hundred earls."
"Who was not one to be desired," interposed the young girl.
"Ah, you read Tennyson then? It is odd, but a good many of us begin on
poetry. I like it very much myself."
A touch of thought settled between Hanny's brows.
"Are you wondering about my mixed lineage? Part of it came from the old
Dutch governor, Jacob Leisler. My grandfather went to Germany, and ran
away with a lady of high degree, and brought her back to America, where
my father was born, and lived all his young life, until his marriage.
Then business took him abroad, and I was born; and my mother died at
Copenhagen. My father is connected with the importing house of Strang,
Zahner, & Co., of which Mr. Jasper is a member. He is married again, to
a very sweet, amiable German woman. Oh, here we are to take our places!"
Hanny hesitated an instant. She longed to have Mrs. Jasper's
approbation.
"We have been looking for you," said Ben. "Let us begin in the one set.
Here is Daisy and Joe."
Then it would be all right. She glanced up and smiled with cordial
assent.
The old-fashioned Spanish dance was a great favourite at that time, when
germans were unknown. Its graceful turns and windings, its stately
balances, until the dancers seemed all one long elegant chain, that
moved to the perfect time of the music, was indeed fascinating. People
danced then. Youth never dreamed of being bored, and walking languidly.
Every movement was delicate and refined.
Was she really in some enchanted country? When Mr. Andersen was
compelled to leave her, he glanced over or past his partner with an
expression so near a smile that Hanny's pulses quickened. When he came
back, the light touch of his hand gave her a little thrill that was
quite delicious. Now and then they had a bit of conversation.
Once he said, in his charming fashion, that was admiration rather than
criticism:--
"Why, you _are_ very petite!"
"Yes; I am not the tall, slim English girl."
"I am very glad. We dance so well together; I wish I were not going away
so soon. And you can't guess--you will think it strange,--to American
ideas it is; but when I go back I have to hunt up a descendant of this
grandmother of high degree who has been making matrimonial overtures to
my father on my behalf."
"Oh, that is like a story! And what will you do?"
"I will think about it, and answer you when you return to me."
He gave her to the next partner, with a graceful inclination of the
head.
There were numberless evolutions before he could take her again. She
glanced up out of sweet, questioning eyes.
"I've been considering," he resumed, as if they had not parted. "You
see, it is this way. My father is very, very fond of me, though there
are other children. Then I have my mother's fortune, which he has been
very watchful of. He is a splendid, upright, honourable man. Now, if
your father asked such a thing of you,--what I mean is, if he asked you
to see some one and learn how well you could like her or him--"
She was off again. Oh, what a sweet little fairy she was! What poet
wrote about twinkling feet? Hers certainly twinkled in their daintiness.
He had not considered her prettiness at first; now it seemed as if she
was exquisitely fair, with that soft pink in her cheeks.
"Yes. Do you not believe you would go to please him, and see? And you
might not like her, and she might not like you. But sometimes people do
take sudden fancies. What do you think, looking at it out of an American
girl's eyes?"
"I should go for my father's sake."
There was such a delicate gravity in her clear eyes as she raised them a
little.
"Thank you," he returned softly. "What an odd thing to talk of in the
midst of our dancing! When you are older, you will find people making a
confidante of you very often, you seem so serious and truthful."
They were coming down to the end of the winding chain; Mr. and Mrs.
Jasper stood there. One more figure, and the cornet and horns and
violins gave three long breaths of melody and stopped.
"My dear children," said Mrs. Jasper, as she stretched out her hand.
"Daisy, you will be in bed all day to-morrow! Your mother will never
trust me with you again, Hanny; I didn't think it would be so long."
"But it was so delightful, mamma." Daisy was in a tumult of pleasure.
"We must go at once. Mr. Jasper will be back by the time we have found
our wraps. Doctor, I can't thank you for making such a patient martyr of
yourself, only you are always so good. Hanny, have you had a nice time?"
"It has been splendid," with a long, long breath, and shining lights in
her eyes.
Delia went to the dressing-room with them.
"I'm going to have two more dances," she said. "It is the first real
ball I've been to in a long while. I'm so glad you came. Ben says he
never imagined you were so pretty. Think of that, from one's own
brother! And Daisy did not shine you down, either."
Hanny kissed her with a sort of rapture. She couldn't understand; she
seemed to be walking on the azure clouds instead of solid earth.
Mr. Andersen went to the carriage with them, and said he should surely
call when he returned from Philadelphia.
Daisy leaned her head down on her mother's shoulder. She was more tired
than she would admit. Hanny's eyes were like stars, and her brain was
still filled with wonderful melodies and light airy figures trooping to
the ravishing sounds, the shimmering light and sparkle. Doctor Joe just
carried her up the steps, and opened the door with his latch-key. But
Mrs. Underhill had heard them, and she came downstairs, wrapped in a
shawl.
"Oh, Joe, how could you keep her out so late! Do you know it's almost
three o'clock?"
Then the mother folded her to her heart. It seemed as if she had been
snatched from some great danger; and now that she had her safe and
sound, she felt as if she should never let her go again.
"You're all excitement, Hanny; you tremble like a leaf. Such
dissipations are bad for growing girls."
"Oh, mother, I think I'm done growing," Hanny laughed, with a soft ring
of music in her voice. "I have wanted to be tall like Margaret; but now
I do not mind a bit. I think I shall always be father's little girl. And
the dancing was so delightful; but you can't think how queer and long
the supper was. And Mr. Thackeray really shook hands with me. He has two
little girls, and they haven't any mother. If you could have seen Daisy!
And she dances beautifully."
"Hanny, your tongue runs like a mill-race. Do keep still, child. Cynthia
has you pinned in every fashion. I hope your dress looked nice enough
for a little girl. There, I'll take care of them all. You will never
want to get up in the morning."
When she had hung the dress out of sight, she felt as if she had her
little girl once more. And the little girl fell asleep to the sound of
the most delicious music ever floating through one's brain.