CHAPTER IV

_A night in Ann street._

We proceed now to show how the Corporal discovered the fact that Fanny

Aubrey was confined in the mansion of the Honorable Mr. Tickels, in

South street.

Great was the consternation and alarm of the blind basket-maker and

little Charley, as the day passed away and evening came on, without the

return of Fanny. They were agitated with a thousand fears for her

safety, for both their lives were bound up in hers, and they doted on

her with an affection rendered doubly ardent by their poverty and almost

complete isolation from the world. In the midst of their distress,

Corporal Grimsby entered, bringing, as on the evening before, a basket

of provisions. To him they communicated the intelligence that Fanny had

not returned; and the eccentric old man, without waiting to hear the

recital of their fears, threw the basket on the table, bolted

precipitately down stairs, and walked away towards Ann street with a

rapidity that betokened the existence of some fixed purpose in his mind.

Meanwhile, his reflections ran somewhat in the following strain, and

were half muttered aloud, as he trudged quickly onward, now nearly

upsetting a foot passenger and receiving a malediction on his

awkwardness, and then bruising his unlucky shins against lampposts and

other street fixtures.

"By the nose of Napoleon! what can have become of the little minx? lost

or stolen?--most probably the latter, for in this infernal city a pretty

girl like her, so unprotected and so poor, can no more traverse the

streets with safety, than can a fine fat goose waddle into the den of a

wolf unharmed. Curses on these lampposts, I am always breaking my neck

against them--bah! Well, to consider: but why the devil do I interest

myself in this little girl at all? Is it because I am a lonely, solitary

old codger, with neither chick nor child to bless me with their love,

and whom I may love in return? Bah! no--that can't be; and yet, somehow,

there is a vacant corner in my old heart, and the image of that little

girl seems to fill it exactly. I am an old fool, and yet--damn you, sir,

what d'ye mean by running against me, eh!--and yet, it did me more good

to see that hungry family last night, eat the food that I had provided

for them, than it did when I, Gregory Grimsby, was promoted to the

elevated rank of Corporal. Now about this little girl--I'll bet my

three-cornered cock'd hat against a pinch of Scotch snuff that she has

been abducted--entrapped into the power of some scoundrel for the worst

of purposes. That's the most natural supposition that I can get at. Now

display thy logic, Corporal: thy supposed scoundrel must be rich, for

poor men can seldom afford such expensive luxuries as mistresses; being

rich implies that he is _respectable_--so the world says and

thinks--bah! Being respectable, he would not compromise his character by

engaging personally in such a low business as entrapping a girl; no--he

would employ an _agent_; and such an agent must necessarily be a very

low person, whether male or female--if a male, he is a ruffian--if a

female, she is a strumpet--and where do ruffians and strumpets, of the

_lower orders_ (for even in crime there is an aristocracy)[A] where do

they usually reside? why, in a congenial atmosphere--in the lowest

section of the city; and what is the lowest section of this city? why,

_Ann street_, to be sure. Truly, Corporal Grimsby, thou art an admirable

logician! So now I am on my way to Ann street, to explore its dens, in

the hope (a vain one, I fear) of finding the supposed agent who was

employed by the supposed rich scoundrel to abduct, kidnap, or entrap my

little Fanny. Should I be so fortunate as to find that agent, money will

readily induce him or her to divulge the place where the girl is hid;

for the principle of "honor among thieves" has, I believe, but an

imaginary existence."

[A] The honest Corporal was right; the well-dressed, gentlemanly,

speculating, wholesale swindler would scorn to associate with the needy

wretch who protracts a miserable existence by small pilferings--and the

fashionable courtezan who promenades Washington street and "sees

company" at a splendidly furnished brothel, can perceive not the

slightest resemblance between her position in society and that of the

wretched troll who practises indiscriminate prostitution in some low

"crib" in Ann street. And yet philosophy and common sense both level all

moral distinction between the two conditions.--A noble murderer once

protested against being hung on the same gallows with a

chimney-sweep--there was aristocracy with a vengeance! We opine that the

lofty and arrogant pretensions of some of our "nabobs," who are often of

obscure and sometimes of ignominious birth, are scarcely less ridiculous

than the aristocratic notions of a gentlemanly rascal who robs _a la

mode_ and picks a pocket with gentility and grace!

Leaving the Corporal to explore the intricate labyrinths of Ann street,

(in the hope of obtaining some clew to the fate of Fanny Aubry,) thou

wilt have the kindness, gentle reader, to accompany us into one of the

squalid dens of that great sewer of vice and crime. But first we pause

to read and admire the sign which decorates the exterior of a "crib"

opposite Keith's Alley, and which, with a peculiarity of orthography

truly amusing, notifies you that it is a "_Vittlin Sollor._" (This sign

remains there to this day.) Passing on, we cannot fail to be impressed

with the "mixed" nature of the society of the place; colored ladies and

gentlemen (by far the most decent portion of the population) are every

where to be seen, thronging the side-walks, indulging in boisterous

laughter; loafers of every description are lounging about, whose

tattered garments indicate the languishing condition of their wardrobes;

great, ruffianly fellows stare at you with eyes expressive of the

villainy that prompts to robbery and murder;--miserable men, ghastly

women, and dirty children obstruct the pathway, and annoy you with their

oaths and ribald jests. Let us descend this steep flight of steps, and

enter this cellar. Be not too fastidious in regard to the odor of the

place, for _eau de cologne_ and otto of rose are not exactly the

commodities disposed of here, the place being devoted to the sale of

that beverage classically termed "rot-gut," and eatables which, unlike

wine, are by no means improved in flavor by age. There is the "bar," and

the red-nosed gentleman behind it seems to be one of its best patrons. A

wooden bench extends around the apartment, and upon it are seated about

twenty persons of both sexes. A brief sketch of a few of the "ladies" of

this goodly company may prove interesting, from the fact that the names

are real, and belong to prostitutes who even now inhabit the regions of

Ann street.

That handsome, finely-formed female, with dark eyes and hair in

ringlets, and who is also very neatly dressed, is "Kitty Cling-cling,"

who has been termed the "belle of Ann street." That lady in a red dress,

with hair uncommonly short, (she having only recently dispensed with a

wig,) is Joannah Westman, of Fleet street, and Liverpool Jane from the

same _respectable_ neighborhood. This renowned "Lady" of the town was

(and is) distinguished by a huge scar on her left cheek, which seems to

be the exact impression of a gin bottle, probably thrown in some brawl

in Liverpool, her native place. Then there is Lize Whittaker, from

Lowell, who "ties up" at the corner of Fleet and Ann streets. Then we

notice two ladies who rejoice in the mellifluous names of "Bald-head"

and "Cockroach," and who are both worthy representatives from Keith's

Alley. These, with a small sprinkling of ebony lasses and their

attendant cavaliers, make up the very respectable assemblage.

And now everybody brightens up, as a couple of colored gentlemen enter

the cellar, and seating themselves upon a raised platform termed by

courtesy "the orchestra," commence tuning a fiddle and base viol,

preparatory to a dance by "all the characters."--Away the musicians

glide into the harmonious measures of a gay quadrille--and to say the

truth, the music is excellent, for Picayune and Joe are very skillful

performers on their respective instruments; and are well qualified to

play for a much more select and fashionable auditory. And now the

voluptuous Kitty Cling-cling is led to the centre of the festive hall by

a sable mariner, and begins to foot it merrily to the dulcet strains;

while Bald-head and Cockroach find partners in two African geniuses,

whose dress and general appearance would most decidedly exclude them

from admission into a fancy ball at Brigham's. Away they go, through all

the intricate mazes of the giddy dance. But see--a crowd of well-dressed

but dissipated young men enter the cellar, their wild looks and

disordered attire plainly indicating that they are on a regular "time."

Those young men have been imbibing freely at some fashionable saloon in

Court or Hanover street, and have come to consummate the evening's "fun"

by having a dance with the fallen goddesses of Ann street. With a

facetious perversity, they select as partners the most hideous of the

negro women, and "mix in" the dance with a relish that could not be

surpassed if their partners were each a Venus, and the cellar a

magnificent hall of Terpsichore. The dance concluded, they throw down a

handful of silver upon the counter, and invite "all hands to take a

drink," but very rarely drink themselves in such a place, well knowing

the liquor to be unworthy the palate of men accustomed to the superior

beverages of the aristocratic establishments. At the completion of this

ceremony, they take their departure, to visit some other "crib," and

repeat the same performances.

But let us (supposing ourselves to be invisible) pass from the dance

hall and enter the adjoining apartment, which is smaller. Seated around

a rough deal table are about thirty men and women, engaged in smoking

and drinking. The room is dimly lighted by a couple of tallow candles,

stuck in bottles; the walls are black with dust and smoke, and the

aforesaid table and a few benches constitute the entire furniture of the

room. The general frequenters of the cellar are not admitted to this

place, it being especially reserved for the use of those ladies and

gentlemen who gain their living on the principle of an equal division of

property--or in other words, _thieves_. In this room, secure from being

overheard by the uninitiated and vulgar crowd, they could "ply the

lush," and "blow a cloud," while they talked over their exploits and

planned new depredations. The room was called the "Pig Pen," and the

society who resorted there classed themselves under the expressive tide

of "Grabbers." Although not a regularly organized association, it had a

sort of leader or captain whose authority was generally recognized. This

gentleman was called "Jew Mike," from the fact of his belonging to the

Hebrew persuasion; he was a gigantic, swarthy ruffian, with a long,

black and most repulsive features, and was dressed in a style decidedly

"flash," his coat garnished with huge brass buttons, and his fingers

profusely adorned with jewelry of the same material. He had recently

graduated from the State Prison, where he had served a term of ten years

for manslaughter, as the jury termed it; although it was universally

regarded as one of the most cold-blooded and atrocious murders ever

committed. To sum up the character of this man in a few words, he was a

most desperate and blood-thirsty villain, capable of perpetrating the

most enormous crimes; and dark hints were sometimes thrown out by his

associates in reference to his former career; some said that he was an

escaped murderer from the South; others that he had been a pirate; while

all united in bearing unqualified testimony as to the villainy of his

character and the number and blackness of his crimes. He could not plead

_ignorance_ in extenuation of his manifold enormities, for he possessed

an education that would have qualified him to move in a respectable

sphere of society, had he been so disposed. Upon his right was seated no

less a personage that "Sow Nance," the hideous girl who had that day

entrapped poor Fanny Aubry into the power of Mr. Tickels; she was much

intoxicated, and by the maudlin fondness which she displayed for Jew

Mike, it was easy to surmise the nature of the relation existing between

her and him. Included in the company were several other "apple girls,"

whose proficiency as thieves entitled them to the distinction of being

considered as competent "Grabbers;" each one of these wretched young

creatures had her lover, of "fancy man," who was generally some low,

petty thief--although, among the male portion of the assembly, there

were several expert and daring robbers, the most distinguished of whom

was Jew Mike himself, whose skill as a burglar had elevated him to the

highly honorable position of captain of the "Grabbers."

The "lush" was freely handed round, and the company soon grew "half seas

over;" then came wildly exaggerated narratives of exploits in robbery,

thieving, and almost every species of crime, interspersed with smutty

anecdotes and obscene songs, in which the females of the company were

not a whit behind the males. At length Jew Mike himself was vociferously

called on for either a song or a story; and not being a vocalist, the

gentleman preferred entertaining his friends with the latter; so,

clearing his throat by an enormous draught of brandy, he began as

follows:

JEW MIKE'S STORY

"You see, lads and lasses, a year or two before I came to this

accursed country to be _jugged for a ten spot_, for manslaughter, (it

was a clear murder, though, and a good piece of work, too,) I was a

nobleman's butler in the great city of London. Ah, _that_ was the

place for a man to get a living in! No decent "Grabber," would stoop

to petty stealing there; beautiful burglaries, yielding hundreds of

pounds in silver plate; elegant highway robberies, producing piles of

guineas and heaps of diamond watches,--that was the business followed

by lads of the cross at that time in England. Well, there's no use in

crying over spilt milk, any how; I was obliged to step out of England

when the country got too hot to hold me, and if I returned there, by

G----! my life wouldn't be worth a moment's purchase. And now to go on

with my story. I was a nobleman's butler, and glorious times I had of

it--little to do, plenty of pickings and stealings, free access to the

pantry and wine-cellar, and enjoying terms of easy intimacy with the

prettiest chambermaid in London. The only drawback upon my happiness

was Lord Hawley's _valet_, a Frenchman, named Lagrange, who had been

in his lordship's service many years, and was regarded as a remarkably

honest and faithful man,--and so he was; but those qualities which

rendered him valuable to his lordship, of course rendered him devilish

obnoxious to me,--for he suspected my real character, and was

continually playing the spy upon me, and informing my master of all my

little peccadilloes. For instance, his lordship would send for me in

his library, and say, sternly,--'Simpson, my valet Lagrange informs me

that you are improperly intimate with one of the female domestics; you

must stop it, or quit my service.' And perhaps the next day he would

again summon me before him, and, with that cursed valet grinning

maliciously at me from behind his chair, say to me,--'Simpson, I hear

that you make too free with my wine, and are frequently intoxicated;

stop it, or I shall dismiss you.' In short, Lagrange was the bane of

my existence, and I secretly swore to be terribly revenged upon him

for his tattling propensities. You'll soon see how well I kept my

oath.

"My Lady Hawley was a very gay, dissipated and beautiful woman, and I

had long been aware that during my master's absence she was in the

habit of receiving the clandestine visits of a handsome young officer

of dragoons. To tell the truth, I used to admit him to the house, and

see that no one was in the way to observe him enter her ladyship's

chamber, for which services I received very liberal rewards from both

her ladyship, and Captain St. Clair. Lord Hawley doted upon his wife,

who was many years younger than himself; and often have I laughed in

my sleeve when I thought what a cuckold she made of him. But he

suspected nothing of the kind; I was the only person, besides the

parties, who knew of the intrigue; even Lagrange, artful spy as he

was, did not discover it. My master, who was addicted to gambling, was

absent until a late hour every night, at Crockford's; and thus her

ladyship had every opportunity to enjoy frequent interviews with her

lover. As I knew of her frailty, I had her completely in my power; and

often I was tempted to threaten her with exposure, unless she would

"come down" handsomely with a thousand pounds or so, and grant me _any

other favor_ that I might choose to demand, as the price of my

silence,--for, as I said before, she was a beautiful woman, and a

butler has feelings as ardent as those of a captain of dragoons.

"Well, matters continued very quiet and agreeable, until late one

night, after I had gone to bed, I heard a low but hurried knock at the

door of my room. I arose, hastily threw on a few garments, and opened

the door, when to my astonishment in rushed Lady Hawley, in her

night-dress, and threw herself into a chair, breathless with

agitation. Almost instantly the thought flashed through my mind that

her intrigue had been discovered; cautiously closing the door, I

advanced towards her ladyship, and in a respectful manner inquired why

she had honored me with a visit so unexpected, and what might be the

cause of her evident agitation, at the same time assuring her of my

assistance, should she require it. She fixed her proud, beautiful eyes

upon my face, and said, in a voice trembling with emotion,--

"'Good heavens, Simpson, only think of it, my foolish affair with

Captain St. Clair is discovered!'

"'Is it possible, your ladyship?' I cried, 'and may I ask who--'

"'His lordship's valet, Lagrange, saw me, half an hour ago, conducting

the Captain to the private stair-case which leads to the garden,'

replied her ladyship, shuddering, and shading her face with her hands.

"'And might not your ladyship purchase his silence?' I asked. She

replied,--

"'I have just come from his room; you know how obstinate he is,--how

entirely devoted to his lordship,--how blindly honest and faithful

he has ever been,--how singularly averse to receiving presents from

any source whatever, fearing it might have the appearance of bribery.

I went to his room, and offered him a hundred guineas if he would

solemnly swear never to reveal what he had seen. In a tone of cold

indifference he said, 'I must do my duty to his lordship, to whom I am

bound by the strongest ties of gratitude, even at the sacrifice of

your ladyship's honor.' I entreated him, almost on my knees, to give

the required promise; I offered to double, nay, treble the sum that I

had named, but no; he turned from me, almost with disdain, (the

low-born menial!) and requested me to retire, as I must be aware of

the impropriety of such a visit, at such an hour. Perceiving the

uselessness of attempting to bribe him to secrecy, I left him, cursing

him for his obstinacy, and came direct to you. Heavens!' added her

ladyship, drawing her robe over her partially denuded bosom, 'how

desperate the fear of exposure has made me, that in this indecent

attire I go at midnight to the chambers of male servants!--Simpson,

can you help me in this dreadful emergency? You have heretofore proved

faithful to me,--do not desert me now. _Lagrange must be

silenced!_--do you understand me? At any cost,--at any risk,--his

babbling tongue must be hushed, _by you_, for you are the only person

whom I can trust in the affair. Yes, he must never speak the word that

will proclaim my dishonor to the world!'

"'_At any cost_, your ladyship?' rejoined I, fixing my eyes steadily

upon hers, for her despair rendered me bold, and I was not one to

suffer an opportunity to slip by unimproved.

"'I understand you, fellow!' she replied, with a hysterical laugh and

a glance of scorn,--'and much as I despise you, I answer yes! at any

cost. But, gracious Heavens, what do I say? _you_, a menial, a

base-born servitor! But no matter; even _that_ is far preferable to

exposure. Good God! to think of being cast off by his lordship with

loathing and contempt, despised and hated by my relatives,--an eternal

blot upon my name,--forever excluded from the sphere of society of

which I am the star and centre,--no, that shall never, never be.

Silence Lagrange--silence him forever,--then ask of me any favor, and

it shall not be denied.'

"I approached her ladyship; she was pale as marble, but how superbly

beautiful! Her glossy hair, all disordered, hung in rich masses upon

her uncovered shoulders; her seductive night-dress but imperfectly

concealed the glories of her divine form,--her heaving bosom, so

voluptuous and fair, was more than half disclosed to my gaze. With a

palpitating heart I laid my trembling hand upon one of her plump,

white shoulders. Never shall I forget the majestic rage and scorn of

her look, as she started to her feet, and stood before me in all the

pride of her imperial beauty.

"'Fellow,' she said, with desperate calmness, 'you are bold; but

perhaps I ought to have expected this. I perceive that you are

disposed to take every advantage of my situation. Be it so, then; but

not until you have _earned the reward_, can you claim it. Remember

this. Fortunately, his lordship is out of town, and will not return

until the day after to-morrow; but oh! how unfortunate that his

accursed valet did not accompany him! Lagrange pretended to be ill,

and was left behind, and my lord was attended by another servant. No

matter,--you will have an opportunity to dispose of this French spy

ere the return of his master. I care not what method you take to

silence his tongue,--but be secret and sure; and when the work is

done, you shall have your reward--not before.'

"Having thus spoken, her ladyship swept out of the room with the air

of a queen, leaving me to devise the best method of silencing Lagrange

forever. I could not mistake her ladyship's meaning; she wished me to

_murder_ the man. Now, the fact is, ladies and gentlemen, murder's a

devilish ticklish business, any how; not that I ever had any false

delicacy in relation to the wickedness of the thing--pshaw! nothing of

the kind,--you'll all believe me when I assure you that I'd as soon

cut a human throat, as wring the neck of a chicken, for that matter;

but then the consequences of a discovery are so ducedly unpleasant,

and although I am confident in my own mind that I am destined to

terminate my existence ornamented with a hempen cravat, I have never

had any desire to hasten that consummation. So I didn't altogether

relish the job which her ladyship had given me; but when I thought of

her surpassing beauty, my hesitation vanished like mists before the

rising sun, and I resolved to do it.

"Several times the next day I tried to provoke Lagrange into a

quarrel, but the wily rascal, as if divining my intentions, only

shrugged his shoulders and smiled in the cold and sarcastic manner

peculiar to him. This enraged me greatly, and after applying the most

abusive epithets to him, I finally struck him. But all availed

nothing; unlike the majority of his countrymen, the fellow was cold

and passionless, even under insults and blows. I had provided myself

with a sharp butcher's knife, which I carried in my sleeve, ready to

plunge into his heart, had he offered to attack me in return; and thus

I hoped to make it appear that I had slain him in self-defence. But

his admirable coolness and self-possession defeated that scheme,--and

I saw that I would be obliged to slay him deliberately at the first

opportunity.

"That opportunity was not long wanting.

"During the afternoon he had occasion to visit the wine vault, of

which I alone had the key; I accompanied him thither, and while he was

engaged in selecting some malt liquor for the servants' table, I said

to him,--

"'Monsieur Lagrange, you are acquainted with a secret that intimately

concerns her ladyship; what use do you intend to make of this

knowledge?'

"The Frenchman very coolly intimated that it was none of my business,

and continued his employment. His back was towards me; I approached

nearer to him, and said, in a low tone--

"'You infernal, backbiting, sneaking scoundrel, you have often

betrayed me to my master, and would now betray her ladyship. You shall

not live to do it--die like a dog, as you are!'

"While thus addressing him, I had drawn forth my knife; and as I

uttered the last words, I plunged it with all my force into his left

side, up to the very handle. The blade passed directly through his

heart, and without a groan he fell dead at my feet.

"No remorse--no sorrow for the bloody deed I had committed, found

entrance to my soul; on the contrary, I gazed at the corpse with

savage exultation. 'That babbling tongue is now forever hushed,'

thought I; and then, as a sudden strange thought struck me, I

added--'and that tongue shall be my passport to a bliss more exquisite

than the joys of Paradise.' With an untrembling hand I cut off the

dead man's tongue, secured it about me, and having hid the body behind

a row of wine casks, left the cellar, securely locked the door, and

then went about my usual avocations, resolving to dispose of the

corpse that night in some manner that should avert suspicion from me,

for I had every confidence in my own ingenuity.

"Towards evening, I sought and obtained an interview with her

ladyship, in private. She advanced to meet me with a hurried step and

sparkling eyes.

"'Simpson, _is it done_?' she asked, in a tone of extreme agitation,

and laying her delicate hand on my arm.

"'It is, your ladyship,' was my reply, producing and holding before

her the bloody evidence of the deed--'and here is the tongue of

Lagrange,--the tongue that would have proclaimed your shame and

effected your ruin, had its owner lived; but he now lies a cold

corpse, and this once mischievous member is now as powerless as a

piece of carrion beneath a butcher's shamble.'

"'And the body--how will you dispose of that?' she asked, shuddering,

and turning from the sickening spectacle with disgust.

"'To-night it shall be sunk deep in the waters of the Thames,' I

replied; and then, in a more familiar manner than I had as yet

ventured to assume, I reminded her ladyship of the _reward_ she had

promised me, as soon as the job should be completed. Again she

shuddered;--and turned deadly pale; and with a bitter smile, which

seemed to me to be expressive of hatred and contempt combined, she

answered--

"'You are right, Simpson; you have obeyed my wishes, and merit your

reward,--but not now, not now! Come to my chamber at midnight; I shall

expect you,--you understand. Go now--leave me; remove all traces of

your crime. I shall take care to have a quantity of plate removed from

the house to-night, and destroyed, and when his lordship returns

to-morrow, he will imagine that Lagrange, despite his supposed

faithfulness and integrity, has absconded and stolen the plate,--that

will account to him for the valet's sudden disappearance. Leave me.'

"'Remember, at midnight, your ladyship,' said I, and left her; but

when I had closed the door of the apartment, I imagined that I heard

her give utterance to a scornful laugh. However, I attributed it to

her gratification at the death of Lagrange, and descending to the wine

cellar, I busied myself in washing away the stains of blood from the

floor. How impatiently I longed for the arrival of midnight! the hour

that was to bring with it the reward of my crime!

"During the evening, I paid a visit to a noted "_boozing ken_" in St.

Giles', which bore the very suitable appellation of the "Jolly

Thieves." Here I engaged two desperate fellows of my

acquaintance--(for I went on a _crack_, now and then, myself, just to

keep my hand in,)--to make away with the body of Lagrange; they were

to come to the rear of my master's house, an hour after midnight,

provided with a sack and some means of conveyance; and, for a liberal

reward, they promised to carry off the corpse, and, having attached a

heavy weight to it, sink it in the Thames,--although I felt assured

in my own mind, that, instead of giving it to the fishes, they would

make a more profitable disposition of it, by selling it to some

surgeon for dissection;--body-snatching being a part of their

profession, as well as burglary and murder. Having made this important

arrangement, and paid them a good round sum in advance, (for I was

well provided with money,) I returned to my master's house, which I

reached about eleven o'clock.

"At length the welcome midnight hour arrived, and with a beating heart

I repaired to the chamber of her ladyship. It was a large apartment,

furnished with exquisite taste and elegance,--in fact, a perfect bower

of the graces; and, to my somewhat voluptuous mind, not the least

attractive feature of it, was a magnificent and luxurious _bed_,

mysteriously hidden beneath a profuse cloud of snowy drapery, heavily

laden with costly lace. I had already pictured to myself the delights

of an amorous dalliance within that bower of Venus, with one whose

glorious beauty could not have been surpassed by that of the ardent

goddess herself--but how grievously was I doomed to be disappointed,

at the very moment when I fancied my triumph certain! But I must not

anticipate my story.

"In answer to my respectful, and I must own, somewhat timid, knock at

the chamber door, I heard the musical but subdued voice of her

ladyship bidding me to 'come in.' I entered, and having softly closed

the door, noiselessly turned the key in the lock, and advanced to

where she was seated by a table, upon which there stood wine, and

materials of a _recherche_ supper. Drawing a chair close to her

ladyship, I seated myself, and gazed at her long and ardently, while

she, apparently unconscious of my presence, seemed to be deeply

engaged in perusing a splendid volume of Byron's poems.

"Surprised and not perfectly at ease, in consequence of her silence

and abstraction (for she had not even glanced at me,) I at length

ventured to observe--

"'Your ladyship sees that I am punctual; as of course I could not

neglect to keep so delightful an appointment.'

"Still she answered nothing, nor even raised her eyes from the book!

During the silence of some minutes that ensued, I had an excellent

opportunity to feast my eyes upon the seraphic loveliness of her face,

and the admirable proportions of her queen-like form. She was dressed

with studied simplicity, and in a style half _neglige_, infinitely

more fascinating than the most elaborate full dress. A robe of snowy

whiteness, made so as to display her plump, soft arms, and fine,

sloping shoulders, and entirely without ornament, constituted her

attire; and a single white rose alone relieved the jet darkness of her

clustering hair. She was seated in a manner that enabled me to view

her profile to the best advantage; I was never more forcibly struck

with its purely classical and Grecian outlines; and I observed that a

soft expression of melancholy was blended with the usual _hauteur_

that sat enthroned upon her angelic features.

"As I gazed admiringly upon the beautiful woman, whom I could almost

imagine to be a being from a celestial world, I could not help saying

to myself--

"'After all, she is an adulteress and a murderess; and is now about to

sacrifice her person to me, the instrument of her murderous wishes.

Why, what a devil is here, in the form of a lovely woman, whose beauty

would seem to proclaim her a tenant of the skies, while the black

depravity of her heart fits her only for the companionship of the

fiends below! Why do I hesitate and tremble in her presence? She is in

my power--my _slave_! Yet, by heavens, what a superb creature! A

thousand passionate devils are dancing in her brilliant eyes--her lips

are moist with the honey of love--and her form seems to glow with

ardent but hidden fires! Come, let me delay no longer, but speak to

her in the language befitting a master to his slave!'

"'Lady,' said I, in a tone familiar, yet not disrespectful--'why this

reserve and silence? You know for what purpose I come thus at midnight

to your chamber--it is by your own appointment, and to receive the

reward of a difficult and dangerous service which I have performed for

you. Nay, I see that you have anticipated my coming, by preparing this

delicate and acceptable feast for our entertainment. Is it not so, my

charmer? And you have dressed yourself in this bewitching style of

chaste simplicity, solely to please me--am I right? But come; though

you have not yet spoken or looked at me, sweet coquette that you are,

I read in your bright eyes the confirmation of my hopes. Let us first

banquet upon the delights of love, and then sip the ruby contents of

the sparkling wine-cup, which I'll swear are not one half so sweet as

the nectar of your lips, which now I taste.'

"I clasped her in my arms as I spoke, and attempted to imprint a kiss

upon her lips; but she hurled me from her with disdain, and said, with

an air of lofty dignity--

"'Dog, how dare you thus intrude into the sanctity of my chamber? and

how dared you for a moment presume to think that I intended to keep

the promise which, in my eagerness to have Lagrange silenced, I gave

you? Know that, sooner than submit to your base and loathsome

embraces, I'd brave exposure and even death itself! If _money_ will

satisfy you, name your sum, and be it ever so great, it shall be paid

to you; but presume not to think that Lady Adelaide Hawley can ever so

far forget her birth and rank, as to debase herself with such as you.'

"'_Money_, your ladyship, was not what I bargained for,' I boldly

replied; for the scorn and contempt with which she treated me, stung

me to the quick, and enraged me beyond all measure. 'If your ladyship

refuses to perform, honorably and fairly, your part of the contract,

you must take the consequences; you shall be proclaimed as an

adulteress, and as an accessory to the crime of murder.'

"'Fool!' she cried--yet her countenance indicated the fear she really

felt, notwithstanding the boldness of her words--'fool! expose me at

your peril! You dare not, for your own neck would be stretched in

payment for your treachery, while your charges against me, low,

miserable menial that you are, would never be believed--never! Such

accusations against me, a peeress of the realm, and a lady whose

reputation has never been assailed, would but add to the general

belief in your own guilt, and the certainty of your fate; such charges

would be regarded as a paltry subterfuge, and no one would credit

them. Go, fellow--the bat cannot consort with the eagle, nor can such

as you aspire to even the most distant familiarity with persons of my

rank. Depart, instantly; and to-morrow you shall receive a pecuniary

reward that will amply compensate you for the disappointment you now

feel.'

"With these words she turned away from me, waving her hand in token

that the conference was closed; but I was enraged and desperate, as

much by the scorn of her manner as by the disappointment I felt. A

hell of passion was burning in my heart; and I said to her, in a low,

deep tone--

"'Woman, you shall be mine, even if I am obliged to commit another

murder--I swear it! I hesitated not at perpetrating a deed of blood;

nor will I hesitate now to obtain, by violence and even bloodshed, the

reward you promised me for that deed! Lady, be wise; we are alone at

this silent hour--I am powerful and you are helpless. Consent, then,

or--'

"She interrupted me with a scornful laugh, that rendered me almost

frantic with fury. Reason forsook me; I lost all self-control, and

rushed upon her with the ferocity of a madman, determined to strangle

her.

"Ere I could lay my grasp upon her, I was seized with a force that

nearly stunned me. I arose with difficulty, and to my astonishment

beheld the handsome countenance and glittering uniform of her

ladyship's favored lover, Captain St. Clair!

"'Villain,' said he, in his usual cold and haughty manner, (he was of

noble blood, and as proud as Lucifer,) 'you little imagined that I was

a witness of the entire scene in which you have played so praiseworthy

a part! Upon my honor, you are the most ambitious of butlers! Cooks

and chambermaids are not sufficiently delicate for your fastidious

taste, forsooth!--but you must aspire to ladies of noble birth! Faith,

I should not be surprised to hear of your attempting an intrigue with

her gracious Majesty, the Queen! Hark'ee, fellow, begone! and thank my

moderation that I do not punish you upon the spot, for your infernal

presumption! Yet I would scorn to tarnish the lustre of my good sword

with the blood of such a thing as thou!'

"'Captain,' said I, boldly, (for I am no coward, ladies and gentlemen,

as you all know,) 'as you have seen fit to play the spy, it is fair to

presume that you are acquainted with the circumstances upon which my

claim to the favor of this lady is based. At her instigation, and

prompted by her promises of reward, I have murdered Lord Hawley's

valet, Lagrange, in order to prevent his revealing to his master, the

criminal intimacy existing between you and her ladyship. Now, Captain,

I submit it to you as a man of honor--having committed such a deed,

and exposed myself to such a fearful risk, am I not entitled to the

reward promised by her ladyship? without the hope of which reward, I

never would have bedewed my hands in the blood of my fellow servant.

And can I justly be blamed for claiming that reward, and even for

attempting to obtain it by force, since I have faithfully earned it?'

"The Captain laughed, half in good nature, half in scorn, and said--

"'Faith, you are a well-spoken knave, and appeal to my honor as if you

were my equal; and I am half inclined to pardon your presumption on

account of your wit. Now listen, my good fellow;--her ladyship, as a

measure of policy, wished to have a certain person removed, who was

possessed of a dangerous secret; now you were the only available agent

she could employ to effect that removal. But you demanded a certain

favor, (which shall be nameless,) as the price of your services, and

would accept of no other remuneration. The danger was imminent; what

could her ladyship do? The man must be disposed of, even at the

sacrifice of truth; her ladyship gave the required promise (_intending

never to keep it_,) you performed the service, and very properly, I

own, come to receive your reward. Of course, you perceive the

impossibility of a compliance with your wishes. No intrigue can exist

between the patrician and the plebeian--you are low-born, she of the

noblest blood of the kingdom. Are you so blind, man, that you cannot

see--or are you so stupid that you cannot comprehend--the repugnance

which her ladyship must naturally feel at the very idea of an amorous

intimacy existing between a high-born lady and--good heavens!--a

_butler_? Here, my good fellow, is a purse, containing fifty

guineas--I will double the sum to-morrow. Now go; and remember that

you have everything to expect from our generosity, in a pecuniary

point of view; but a repetition of your demand for her ladyship's

favors, will most assuredly result to your lasting disadvantage.'

"Seeing the folly of attempting to press my claim further, I sneaked

out of the room, with very much the air of a disconcerted cur with his

tail between his legs, to use a simile more expressive than elegant.

The moment I had entered my own chamber, the clock in a neighboring

steeple proclaimed the hour of two, and then for the first time I

remembered the appointment which I had made with my two particular

friends, from the "Jolly Thieves," in reference to the disposal of

Lagrange's body. The hour appointed for meeting them, was passed; and

suddenly a thought struck me--a strange thought--which had no sooner

flashed through my mind, than I resolved to act upon its suggestion.

'Twas a glorious plan of revenge, and one which could only have

emanated from my fertile imagination.

"'The corpse of the Frenchman shall become the instrument of my

vengeance,' thought I, chuckling with glee. 'I shall not need the

assistance of those two fellows now--and, if they are still lurking

about the house, I will reward them for their trouble and send them

away. Ah, lucky thought--lucky thought!'

"I found my two friends in waiting for me; they grumbled much at my

want of punctuality, but their murmurings were hushed when I paid them

liberally, and dismissed them, saying that I had discovered a much

safer and more convenient method of disposing of the body, than the

plan originally proposed, and therefore should not require their

assistance.--They departed, rejoicing at their good fortune in being

freed from a difficult and dangerous task, and congratulating

themselves on having received as much money as they had been promised

for its performance.

"Taking with me a dark lantern, I descended noiselessly into the wine

vault, and having secured the massive iron door, proceeded to execute

my plan of vengeance. Comrades, can you guess what that plan was? No,

I'll swear you cannot. But listen, and you shall hear.

"Placing my light in a convenient position, I dragged the dead body of

Lagrange from its place of concealment; then I bent over it, and

examined the ghastly countenance. The features were pale and rigid,

the teeth firmly set, and the glassy eyes wide open and staring. The

awful expression of those dead orbs seemed, bold as I was, to freeze

my very soul as with the power of a basilisk. For a single moment I

repented the deed; but that feeling soon passed, and I rejoiced at it.

"It occurred to me to search the pockets of my victim; I did so, and

found a small sum of money, and a sealed letter, addressed to Lord

Hawley. The valet had probably intended to despatch that letter to his

master that afternoon--which design was frustrated by his sudden death

by my hand. Eagerly I broke the seal, and read as follows:--

"'LONDON.

"'My lord.--Should your lordship have possibly designed extending

your visit to Berkshire beyond the time originally allotted to the

same, I entreat your lordship to set aside every

consideration--every engagement, however pressing or important its

nature may be, and to return immediately to town. Something has

occurred, in the conduct of her ladyship, intimately affecting your

lordship's honor. To relieve your lordship from any painful

uncertainty that may be occasioned by this indefinite announcement,

you will pardon me for stating plainly, that I myself saw her

ladyship and Captain St. Clair, under circumstances that admitted of

but one opinion in reference to the nature of the intimacy existing

between them. Simpson, the butler, whom I am persuaded is in the

confidence of her ladyship and the Captain, this afternoon

questioned me in regard to my knowledge of the affair, and the use I

intended to make of that knowledge; and he, not deeming my replies

satisfactory, abused and struck me. My duty to your lordship

prevented any retaliation on my part; and that duty, (the offspring

of humble gratitude for your lordship's many acts of generous

kindness to me, both in this country and in France,) now impels me

to communicate these unpleasant facts--which I do, with sincere

sorrow for her ladyship's indiscretion, and every desire for the

preservation of your lordship's honor.

"'From your lordship's humble servant,

"'LOUIS LAGRANGE.'

"This letter, so characteristic of the polished, wily and educated

Frenchman, was written in the French language, with which I was well

acquainted, I therefore easily translated it. After a careful perusal,

I placed it in my pocket-book--for I was well aware that it might one

day prove a valuable auxiliary to me, should I feel disposed to inform

my master of his wife's infidelity, and his lordship then could not

doubt the truth of his own favorite and faithful servant, in whom he

had the most unbounded confidence.

"'Oh, scornful Lady Hawley and sarcastic Captain St. Clair!' I could

not forbear exclaiming--'ye shall both be caught in a net of your own

making, when ye least expect it! My lady will be turned out of doors

as an adulteress; and my gentleman will perhaps be shot through the

head by the husband he has wronged! Patience, patience, good Simpson;

thou shalt yet riot in the very satiety of thy vengeance. But now to

put in operation my first method--an ingenious one it is, too--of

avenging my wrongs!'

"Among the various wines with which the extensive cellar was

abundantly stocked, was a large cask containing a particular kind, of

a very rich and peculiar flavor; and of this wine I knew Lady Hawley,

who was a luxurious woman, very fastidious in her taste, to be

especially fond. Captain St. Clair, too, preferred it above all other

kinds; and at the midnight suppers which he so often enjoyed with her

ladyship, the ruby contents of this particular cask was most

frequently called into requisition, as I well know, for I had been

accustomed to carry it from the cellar to the door of the bed-chamber

wherein the amorous pair indulged in the joys both of Venus and of

Bacchus. The wine had been imported by his lordship, who was a _bon

vivant_, from Bordeaux and was particularly valued for its rich color,

solid body, and substantial yet delicate flavor, rivalling in these

qualities, perhaps, that classic beverage, the famed Greek wine.

"'I will add to the exquisite flavor of this wine,' said I--'her

ladyship and her lover shall banquet on human blood; the corruption of

a putrifying corpse shall be mingled with the sparkling fluid that

nourishes their unholy passions.'

"With but little difficulty, and less noise, (for I well understood

such matters,) I removed the head of the cask, which I found to be

about half full. How luxurious was the odor that arose from the dark

liquid, fragrant with spices! Taking a small vessel, I drank a

bumper--then another. My blood instantly became charged with a

thousand fires; my heart seemed to swell with mighty exultation; my

brain seemed to swim in a sea of delight. I laughed with mad glee to

think of the superb vengeance I was about to wreak on my enemies; then

I raised the corpse of Lagrange with Herculean strength, thrust it

into the cask, and pressed it into the smallest possible compass; but

found to my inexpressible chagrin, that it would be absolutely

impossible to re-adjust the head of the cask, unless the body was in

some manner made smaller. After a few moments' reflection, a happy

thought struck me. I hesitated not a moment, but drew a sharp clasp

knife from my pocket, deliberately severed the head from the body, and

thrust it into the cask. Then, without the least difficulty, I

replaced the top of the cask, and my work was accomplished.

"I repaired to my chamber but slept not, as you may suppose; the

events of that day and night had been of a nature too singularly

exciting to admit of repose. Shortly after I had retired, I heard Lady

Hawley conduct her lover to the back stair-case; there was a sound of

kissing, and a whispered appointment made for another meeting, on a

night when his lordship would probably be absent. 'Yes, and at that

interview, my amorous pair,' thought I, 'shall you taste of the wine

which I have improved by an addition which you little suspect, but

with which you shall one day be made acquainted.' And then I laughed

till the tears rolled down my cheeks.

"Lord Hawley returned at the expected time, and immediately inquired

for his valet, Lagrange. The gentleman was, of course, among the

missing; and I overheard her ladyship announcing to her husband that

the Frenchman had absconded, carrying off plate and jewelry to a

considerable amount. Lord Hawley was extremely shocked and grieved on

receiving this (false) intelligence; and I heard him mutter, as he

retired in great perturbation of mind to his study,--'What, can it be

possible?--Lagrange, whom I esteemed to be the most honest and

faithful fellow in the world--of whose fidelity I have had so many

evidences,--whom I have often benefitted,--can it be that _he_ has

deserted and robbed me? Then indeed do I believe all mankind to be

false as hell!'

"A week passed, and nothing occurred in Hawley House worthy of

mention. At the expiration of that time, his lordship went on a short

journey, (connected with some political object,) which would occasion

him a fortnight's absence from home. Then was her ladyship and the

captain in clover! and then was afforded me an opportunity to set

before them the wine which I had enriched by my famous _addition_!

"Not deeming it necessary to adopt the usual precautions, my lady

feasted, toyed and dallied with her handsome lover in her own private

apartments, fearing no detection, as she was certain that her husband

would not return before the specified time, and as I was the only

person aware of the captain's presence in the house; she feared not,

thinking that I dared not betray her, as she imagined that I was

completely in her power on account of the murder I had committed.

Pretty fool! she little thought of the plan I had formed for her

destruction, and that of her haughty and hated paramour.

"I waited on them at table in my humblest and most respectful manner;

and I could perceive that they inwardly congratulated themselves on

having, as they thought, completely subdued me, and bribed me to

eternal silence with regard to their amours.

"At their very first banquet, (for the splendor of their repasts

merited that high-sounding title,) I was requested to bring from the

cellar a decanter of their _favorite_ wine. You may be sure I did not

mistake the cask, comrades. I drew from the cask which contained the

corpse of Lagrange, a quantity of the wine, and holding it to the

light, observed with intense satisfaction that it had assumed a darker

tinge--it looked just like blood. For a moment I was tempted to

_taste_ it; but damn me! bad and blood-thirsty as I was, I could not

do _that_. The corpse had been soaking in the wine a full week; I was

convinced that the liquid was pretty thoroughly impregnated with the

flavor of my scientific improvement; and even my stomach revolted at

the idea of drinking wine tainted and reeking with the dead flesh and

blood of the man I had murdered.

"I placed the wine on the table before my lady and the Captain; and I

am free to confess that I trembled somewhat, in view of the

possibility of their detecting, at the first taste, the trick which I

had played them. Very nervous was I, when the Captain slowly poured

out a wine glass full, and raised it to his lips; but how delighted

was I, when he drained every drop of it with evident satisfaction,

smacked his lips, and said to the lady--

"'By my faith, Adelaide, 'tis a drink for the gods! How that wine

improves by age! Never before has it tasted so rich, so fruity, so

delicious! Observe what a firm body it has--what deep, rich color--a

fitting hue for a soldier's beverage, for 'tis red as blood. Allow me

to fill your ladyship's glass, that you may judge of its improved and

wonderful merits.'

"Her ladyship drank, and pronounced it excellent. I was in silent

extacies. 'Drink the blood and essence of the murdered dead, ye fools,

and call it sweet as honey to your taste!' I mentally said--'ere many

days your souls shall be made sick with the knowledge of _what_ ye

have drank!'

"The guilty pair were not in the slightest degree reserved in my

presence; on the contrary they jested, they talked, they indulged in

familiarities before my face, in a manner that astonished me not a

little. Comrades, none of you have seen much of fashionable life, I

take it; for although you all belong to the very best society in Ann

street, you can't reasonably be supposed to have much of an idea of

society as 'tis seen in the mansion of an English nobleman. Therefore,

if you don't think my yarn already too tedious, (it's as true as

gospel, every word of it, upon the unsullied honor of a gentleman!)

and if you'd like to know something of the capers of rich and

fashionable people in high life, I'll tell you, in as few words as

possible, some of the sayings and doings of my lady Hawley and her

handsome lover, Captain St. Clair, as witnessed by me, at the time of

which I have been speaking, in London."

Jew Mike paused to take breath and "wet his whistle;" while all his

listeners eagerly requested him to "go on" with his yarn. During the

progress of the narrative, an old, comical looking man, not over well

dressed, had entered the room, unnoticed; and seating himself in one

corner, he pulled a pipe from his pocket, lighted it, and began to

smoke, at the same time taking a keen and intelligent survey of the

motley assembly. Jew Mike, having quenched his thirst, resumed his

story. [The reader will be good enough to observe, that while we give

the substance of this worthy gentleman's narrative, we pretend not to

give his precise words. It is highly probable that he adapted his

language to the humble capacities of his low and illiterate auditors;

and we have taken the liberty to clothe his ideas in words better suited

to the more intelligent and refined understandings of our readers.]

"Well, ladies and gentlemen," said Jew Mike--"as I was saying, Lady

Hawley and Captain St. Clair got so bad that they never minded my

presence a bit, but talked and acted before me with as much freedom as

if I were both deaf and blind. My lady would dress herself in the

Captain's uniform, which fitted her to a charm, for she was a large,

magnificent woman, while he was of no great stature for a man,

although exceedingly well-made and handsome. Not was that all: the

Captain would attire himself in her splendid garments, and, but for

his moustache and imperial, might have passed for a very handsome

woman. And, to carry out the idea still further, my lady would pretend

to take very wild and improper liberties with her lover, which he

would affect to resent with all the indignation proper to his assumed

sex. Then they would roll and tumble upon the soft carpet until they

were quite spent and breathless; after which the Captain would run

into the chamber, and conceal himself beneath, behind, or _in_ the

bed; she would follow in pursuit, close the chamber door, and--I would

apply my eye to the key-hole; but as I am a polite man, and as there

are ladies present, (ahem!) you'll excuse me for not entering into

particulars.

"So much for their actions, now for their words. I was attending them

at supper one night, and to say the truth they were both of them

highly elevated in consequence of having too profusely imbibed their

favorite wine, seasoned with the _essence of Lagrange,_ the name which

I had privately given it. The Captain was very slightly attired, and

my lady had on nothing but a very _intimate_ garment, which revealed

rather more than it concealed--for they had just before been playing

the very interesting game of "hide and seek," and had not yet resumed

all their appropriate garments. I had formerly regarded lady Hawley as

the very _beau ideal_ of all that was dignified, haughty and majestic;

but that night she looked lewd and sensual, in an eminent degree, and

appeared utterly reckless of all decency. She exposed her person in a

manner that astonished me, and seemed to abandon herself without

reserve, to all the promptings of her voluptuous nature. Her

appearance, conversation and actions were not without their influence

on me, you may be sure; and if ever I envied mortal man, it was that

young officer, who could revel at will in the arms of the beautiful

wanton at his side.

"The Captain, reclining his head upon her fair bosom, said--

"'And so Adelaide, in a few days your odious husband will return, and

terminate these rapturous blisses. Why in the devil's name don't the

accursed old man die of apoplexy, or break his neck, or get shot in a

duel, or do something to relieve us of his hated interference with our

stolen joys?'

"'Ah, St. Clair,' answered the lady, with a glance of passion--'would

that the old man were dead! Since I have tasted the sweets of your

society--since I first listened to the music of your voice, and since

first this heart beat tumultuously against yours, my whole nature is

changed--my blood is turned to fire; my religion is my love for you;

my deity is your image, and my heaven--is in your arms. Oh,' she

suddenly exclaimed, as the rich blood mantled on her face and

neck--'how terrible it is for a young and passionate woman to be

linked in marriage to an old, impotent, cold, passionless being, who

claims the name of _man_, but is not entitled to it! And then if she

solaces herself with a lover--as she must, or die--she is continually

agitated with fears of her husband's jealousy, and the dread of

discovery. Like the thirsty traveller in a barren waste, her soul

yearns for an ocean of delights--and pants and longs in vain.

Husband--would that there was no such word, no such relation as it

implies--'tis slavery, 'tis madness, to be chained for life to but one

source of love, when a thousand streams would not satiate or overflow.

Yet the world--the world--disgraces and condemns such as I am, if

discovered; it points to my withered husband, and says--'there is your

only _lawful_ love.' Heavens! the very thought of him sickens and

disgusts me; _he_ a lover! He is no more to be compared to thee, my

St. Clair, than is the withered leaf of autumn to the ripe peach or

juicy pomegranate!'

"'By all the gods of war,' exclaimed the Captain, fired with

admiration at her beauty and the fervor of her passion for him, and

straining her to his breast in a perfect phrenzy of transport--'thy

husband shall be no longer a stumbling-block between us, angel of my

soul; I will insult him--he will challenge me--we will fight--I am the

best shot in Europe, and he will be shot through the heart, if the

cold dotard have one. Yet stay--damn it, why not have him disposed of

after the manner of the valet? Ha, ha! a good thought! Simpson, what

say you? Will you do it for a couple of hundred guineas, and without

laying claim to the favors of her ladyship?'

"The last sentence was uttered with a very palpable sneer; it enraged

me, for by it I was reminded of the manner in which I had been

swindled out of the reward promised for my other murder. Besides, the

man's cool villainy, and the woman's shameless lechery, disgusted me,

bad as I was; for they belonged to that class which professes all the

gentility, refinement and virtue in the world; and to hear the one

glorying in adultery, and the other deliberately proposing murder,

afforded such a damnable instance of the sublime hypocrisy peculiar to

the "upper ten" of society, that I became desperately angry, and

answered the Captain in a manner that astonished him.--You will

remember, comrades, that as great a villain as I am, I am no

hypocrite, and was never accused of being one. And yet hypocrisy

prevails in every department of life. Look," continued Jew Mike,

getting into a philosophical strain, and stroking his enormous beard

with an air of profound complacency--"Look at that venerable looking

old gentleman, who every Sabbath stands in his pulpit to declaim

against wickedness and fleshy lusts. Mark his libidinous eye, as he

follows that painted strumpet to her filthy den. There's hypocrisy.

Then turn your eyes toward a sister city, and mark that grey-headed,

sanctimonious editor, who every week solemnly prates of honesty,

sobriety, and their kindred virtues. 'What an excellent man he is,'

exclaim the whole tribe of fat, tea-drinking old women in mob-caps,

raising their pious eyes and snuffy noses to heaven.--Ha, ha, ha! Why,

ladies and gentlemen, that editor is so cursedly dishonest and so

im--_mensely_ mean, that his hair wouldn't stay black, but turned to a

dirty white before its time--so mean, his food won't digest easy--his

shirt won't dry when washed--his clothes won't fit him--the cholera

won't have him--musquitoes won't bite him--and if, after his lean

carcass is huddled under the turf, his cunning little soul should

attempt to crawl through the key-hole of hell's gate, the devil, whose

lacky he has ever been, would kick him with as much disgust as this

_fraction_ once displayed in kicking a poor wretch whom he had

beggared, starved and ruined!

"But I see, comrades, that you begin to grow impatient at this

moralizing--and well you may, for 'tis always distasteful to look at

such reptiles as we have been contemplating. Well, to take up the

thread of my yarn, which I shall bring to a close as speedily as

possible, for 'tis getting late.--When the Captain proposed that I

should murder Lord Hawley, his and her ladyship's hypocrisy enraged me

to such an extent, that I boldly looked him in the face, and said to

him--

"'Say, who is the greater villain, you or I? You, who prate of your

birth, rank and position in life, and propose a murder, or I, making

no pretensions whatever, I that have committed a murder at the

instigation of one of your class, in the hope of reward? Look you,

Captain; neither you nor your noble strumpet at your side shall bribe

me to commit further crime. Wretches that you both are, false in honor

and in truth, know that I am already fearfully revenged upon you--and

your exposure is at hand. Another murder, indeed!--_have you not both

drank blood enough?_'

"This last sentence I uttered with such significance that the Captain

started and turned pale. 'What mean you, scoundrel?' he demanded.

"'Follow me, both of you, to the wine cellar!' I exclaimed in answer,

fully determined to reveal the awful truth to them at once. Astonished

and subdued by the impressiveness of my manner and the singularity of

my words, they obeyed. Having seized a light from the table, I led

the way to the cellar, and advanced to the cask wherein rotted the

remains of the murdered Lagrange.

"The scene must have been a striking one, comrades. There was the vast

vault, dimly lighted by a single wax taper; around were many black and

mouldering casks containing the juice of the grape, some of which was

of a great age. Before one of those casks, much larger than the

others, stood I, brandishing aloft the implement with which I was

about to break open that strange tomb, and disclose its awful secret.

Beside me, dressed in the slight garments I have already described,

their pale countenances expressive of mingled curiosity and fear,

stood Lady Hawley and Captain St. Clair, whom I thus addressed--

"'This cask, may it please your ladyship and the Captain, contains the

wine which you both are so extremely fond of. You have observed, with

some surprise, that its flavor has of late much improved. I shall now,

with your permission, show you the cause of that improvement, for

which--ha, ha, ha!--you are solely indebted to me. The opening of this

cask will disclose a mystery that you have never dreamed of. Look!'

"They both strained forward in eager expectation. A few blows sufficed

to remove the head of the cask. Horror! a sickening stench arose, and

there became visible the headless trunk of a human being. That portion

of the body which was not immersed in the wine, was putrid. 'Look

here!' cried I, in mad triumph, plunging my arm into the cask, and

drawing forth the ghastly head of Lagrange. I held aloft the horrid

trophy of my vengeance; there were the dull, staring eyes, the

distorted features, and drops of wine oozed from between the set

teeth. With a long, loud shriek, her ladyship fell to the ground

insensible; muttering fierce curses on me, the Captain turned to raise

her, and profiting by the opportunity, I escaped from the cellar and

fled from the house. Making the best of my way to the 'Jolly Thieves,'

in St. Giles, I sought safety and concealment there, where I had ample

leisure to mature my future plans.

"In a day or two I saw it announced in one of the newspapers that a

cask had been found floating in the river Thames, which on opening was

found to contain the body and head of a man, and a quantity of wine.

The circumstance gave rise to the supposition that the body had been

procured by some surgeon for dissection, and for some reason had been

abandoned and thrown overboard. The cask and its contents had, of

course, been thrown into the river through the agency of the Captain;

and the affair gave rise to neither excitement nor investigation.

"Meanwhile, Lord Hawley had returned to town. No sooner was I apprised

of the fact, than I sent him the following blunt and somewhat rude

epistle--for I felt too keen a thirst for vengeance on my enemies to

admit of my being very choice or respectful in my language, even to a

nobleman:--

"'My lord,--you are a cuckold. Do you doubt it? I can prove it,

beyond the shadow of a doubt. Captain Eugene St. Clair is your

lady's lover--she is his mistress. For a long time past, she has,

during your absence, received him into her chamber. You are laughed

at by the pretty pair, as a withered, impotent old dotard. You know

the handwriting of your late valet, Lagrange. Accompanying this is a

letter written by him, to you; before he had an opportunity of

sending it to you, he was _made away with_, through the

instrumentality of your amiable wife, who had every reason to

suppose that he would betray her. The tale trumped up by the noble

harlot about the Frenchman's having stolen your property and fled,

is a lie. My lord, I think you have reason to be grateful to me for

exposing the guilty parties; if so, any pecuniary reward which you

may see fit to send me, by one of your servants, (I am at the _Jolly

Thieves_, in St. Giles,) will be gratefully accepted by

MICHAEL SIMPSON.'

"I thus freely disclosed my place of concealment to his lordship,

because I apprehended no danger to myself, knowing that the nobleman

was a man of honor, who would not injure the person who had rendered

him such an important service as to put him on the track to avenge his

wrongs. And I also anticipated receiving a liberal reward for my

information; nor was I disappointed,--for that very evening a servant

in the Hawley livery called at the _Jolly Thieves_, and presented me

with a small package, which on opening I found to contain bank notes

to the amount of five hundred pounds, and the following note, which

though in his lordship's handwriting, bore neither address nor

signature:--

"'Here is the reward of your information. Accept, also, my thanks.

The proof you have furnished of the truth of your statement, admits

of no doubt. I know how to punish the w**e and her blackguard

paramour. You had better leave the country, for I can surmise what

agency _you_ had in the affair of Lagrange's disappearance; but as

you were the tool of others, I stoop not to molest you. Should the

event, however, gain notoriety, _the law_ of course, will not prove

equally considerate.'

"I was overjoyed! Five hundred pounds, and the certainty of having

ruined my enemies! That night I gave a sumptuous supper to all the

frequenters of the _Jolly Thieves_; and a jolly time we had of it,

I'll assure you, comrades. The most respectable men in London were

present at the feast; there were nine cracksmen, five highwaymen,

twelve pickpockets, two murderers, three gentlemen who had escaped

from transportation, and a smart sprinkling of small workmen, in the

way of _fogle hunters_, (handkerchief thieves,) and _body snatchers_,

(grave robbers). Full forty of us sat down to a smoking supper of

stewed tripe and onions,--ah, how my mouth waters to think of it now!

And then the _lush_!--gallons of ale, rivers of porter, and oceans of

grog! Every gentleman present volunteered a song; and when it came to

be my turn, I gave the following, which, (being something of a poet,)

I had myself composed, expressly for the occasion, to the air of the

_Brave Old Oak_:--

SONG OF THE JOLLY THIEF.

"A song to the thief, the jolly, jolly thief,

Who has plied his trade so long;--

May he ne'er come down to the judge's frown,

Or the cells of Newgate strong.

'Tis a noble trade, where a living's made

By an art so bold and free;

May he never be snug in a cold, stone jug,

Or swing from a two-trunk'd tree!

CHORUS

Then here's to the thief, the jolly thief

Who plies his trade so bold--

May he never see a turnkey's key,

Or sleep in a prison cold!

"This song was received with the most uproarious applause by the

jovial crew; and we separated at a late hour, after giving three

groans for the new police.

"A few days passed away. I never neglected each morning to carefully

peruse all the newspapers; and just as I was beginning to despair of

ever seeing any announcement calculated to assure me that my enemies

were overthrown, I had the intense satisfaction of reading the

following paragraph in the _Times_:--

"'AN AFFAIR OF HONOR. Yesterday morning, his lordship Viscount Hawley

and the Honorable Captain Eugene St. Clair had a hostile meeting in

the suburbs of London. Circumstances of a delicate nature, of which we

are not at liberty to speak at present, are reported to have led to

the difficulty between the noble gentlemen. At the first fire Captain

St. Clair fell, and upon examination it was found that he had been

shot through the heart. He died instantly. His lordship was uninjured,

and immediately departed for the Continent unaccompanied by her

ladyship.'

"I danced with delight when I read this paragraph. 'My vengeance is

already half accomplished,' thought I. But what had become of Lady

Hawley? The newspapers, from day to day and from week to week, were

silent with respect to her fate. At length I began to fear that her

ladyship, after all, was destined to escape uninjured by my endeavors

to effect her ruin. Was I right? You shall see.

"Nearly two years passed away, during which time, with the aid of my

five hundred pounds, I had set up a first-rate public house in a

populous and respectable neighborhood, and was making money. I have

little doubt but that the sign of '_The Red Cask_' is still remembered

in that vicinity--for that was the name which, actuated by a strange

whim, I had given to my tavern; and the same was illustrated by a huge

swinging sign in front, on which was painted the representation of a

large cask overflowing with blood--which, I need scarcely tell you,

was a sly and humorous allusion to the affair of Lagrange's

murder.--Well, one cold, stormy winter's night, when the wind was

howling like ten thousand devils around the house, I was seated in my

comfortable tap-room, making myself extremely happy over a reeking

jarum of hot rum punch. I was alone, for the hour was late, and all my

guests had departed; when suddenly, during a pause in the clatter of

the elements, I heard a low, timid knock at my outer door, which faced

on the street.--Supposing it to be either some thirsty policeman, or a

belated traveller anxious to escape from the fury of the storm, I

arose and unbarred the door; as I opened it, a fierce gust of wind

rushed in, so piercing cold, that it seemed to chill me to the very

marrow of my bones; and at the same moment I beheld a human form

crouching down under the narrow archway over the door, as if vainly

endeavoring to shield herself from the fury of the tempest. I knew it

was a woman, for I caught a glimpse at an old bonnet and tattered

shawl. She shivered with the cold, which even made my teeth chatter,

stout and rugged as I was. 'What do you want?' I demanded roughly--for

I was impatient at having been thus unseasonably interrupted while

paying my devotions to the mug of hot rum punch, in front of a rousing

fire. As she made no immediate reply, I was about to bid her begone

and shut the door, when she said, in a faint, yet earnest tone--'Oh,

sir, for God's sake, as you hope for mercy yourself hereafter, let me

come in for a moment--only a moment--that I may warm my benumbed and

freezing limbs!' I paused a moment; I am not naturally hard-hearted,

unless there is something to be gained by it; and besides, I felt a

kind of curiosity to see what sort of a creature it was who wandered

the streets that awful night, destitute and houseless; so I bade her

come in, and with difficulty she followed me into the tap-room;

placing a seat for her near the fire, I resumed my own, and while

leisurely sipping my punch, a good opportunity was afforded me to

examine her narrowly. She was probably about twenty years of age, but

much suffering had made her look older. Though her features were worn

and wasted, and though her cheeks were hollow by the pinchings of

want, she was beautiful; her eyes were large, lustrous and eminently

expressive, and two or three stray curls of luxuriant hair peeped from

beneath her old, weather stained bonnet. Her form was tall, and

graceful in its outlines; but what particularly struck me was the

singular whiteness and delicacy of her hands, which plainly indicated

that she had never been accustomed to labor of any kind. Her dress was

wretched in the extreme, and was scarce sufficient to cover her

nakedness, much less shield her from the inclemency of the

weather,--nay, my inquisitive researches soon convinced me that the

miserable gown she wore was, excepting an old shawl, her _only

garment_--no under clothing, not even stockings,--and her feet (I

noticed that they were small and symmetrical,) were only separated

from the cold sidewalk by thin and worn-out shoes.--Yet,

notwithstanding all her poverty and wretchedness, there was about her

a look of subdued pride, which, though in strange contrast with her

garb, well became her general air, and regular handsome features.

Everything about her, excepting her dress, convinced me that she had

fallen from better days, and, somehow, that look of pride struck me as

being strangely familiar; yet I racked my brain in vain to recall from

the dreamy past some image that I could identify with the female

before me, who sat in front of my blazing fire and warmed her chilled

limbs with every appearance of the most intense satisfaction.

"Her superior air commanded my involuntary respect. 'Madam,' said I,

'are you hungry?' She eagerly answered in the affirmative; I placed

provisions before her, and she ate with an appetite almost ravenous. I

then gave her some mulled wine, which seemed to revive her greatly;

and she returned me her thanks in a manner so lady-like and refined (a

manner, however, which insensibly partook of a peculiar and indirect

kind of _hauteur_, as remarkable in her tone as in the expression of

her features,) that I was more than ever satisfied that she had

descended to her present wretched situation, certainly from a

respectable, if not from a very superior, order of society.

"'You have benefitted me greatly, sir, and I thank you,' said she,

inclining her head towards me with an air almost condescending. 'I

assure you, you have not bestowed your _assistance_ (she didn't say

_charity_, observe!) upon a habitual mendicant or common person. I am

by birth a lady; you will pardon me for declining to state the causes

of my present condition. Again I thank you.'

"The devil, comrades! here was a starving, freezing beggar woman whom

I had picked out of the street, and warmed and fed, playing the

condescending, reserved lady, forsooth! and abashing and humbling me

by her d----d lofty, proud looks! Ha, ha, ha! and yet I liked it,

mightily; the joke was too good; and so I continued to 'madam' her,

until at last I actually detected her on the very point of calling me

'fellow;' but fortunately for her, she checked herself in time to

escape being turned into the street forthwith.

"And yet the superiority of her air and the haughtiness of her manner

had for me an indescribable charm, no less than her beauty; and I

resolved, if possible, to make her my mistress, for I doubted not that

when she should become nourished and strengthened by proper food and

rest, she would make a very desirable companion for a man of my

amorous temperament. However, I did not broach the subject at that

time, but contented myself with seeing that she was comfortably

provided for that night, under the charge of one of the females of the

house, to whom I gave money with which to provide the strange lady

with proper and respectable clothing in the morning. The next day I

had occasion to go away at an early hour, and did not return until

late in the afternoon, and on entering my little parlor, I was

surprised at beholding a lady, handsomely dressed, who advanced

towards me with an air of dignified politeness. Her rich hair was most

tastefully arranged; her neat dress closely fitted a slender but

elegant shape, and I was struck with the dazzling fairness and purity

of her complexion, and the patrician cast of her features. A second

glance told me it was the female whom I had relieved the previous

night; and I became aware of the fact that the strange lady was no

other than Lady Adelaide Hawley!

"She did not recognize me, for I was much changed, in consequence of

having removed the huge beard which I had worn, while in her husband's

service. You may imagine my triumph at finding the proud lady an

inmate of my house and a dependent on my bounty, under circumstances

so humiliating to her and so gratifying to me; and you may well

believe that I lost no time in giving her to understand the nature of

the reward I expected in return for my hospitality. Would you believe

it? She actually repulsed me with scorn, and began to talk of her

birth, and the superiority of her rank to mine! Her confounded pride

had now become altogether ridiculous; and somewhat enraged, I told her

who I was. She started, regarded me for a moment with a scrutinizing

look, and burst into tears, saying--'It is so, indeed! My punishment

is just; I am humbled and degraded before the very menial I despised.

Take, me, Simpson; do with me as you will; crime levels all ranks. Yet

stay; I am still feeble; delay the consummation of your triumph for

one week. During that period I shall regain the strength I have lost,

and the beauty that has faded; then shall I be a fitting partner for

your bed.' I consented; two or three days passed, and I was rejoiced

to perceive that she daily grew in strength and beauty, and was fast

regaining that voluptuousness of person which had formerly

distinguished her. She related to me, at my request, the particulars

of her downfall. She had been cast off by her husband and rejected by

her relations with scorn and curses, when the fact of her adultery

with St. Clair was discovered.--Entirely friendless and without

resources, she was compelled to place herself under the protection of

a gentleman of fashion and pleasure, who rioted on her luxuriant

charms for a brief season, until possession and excess produced

satiety, the sure forerunner of disgust--she was then thrown aside as

a worthless toy, to make room for some fresh favorite. Rendered

desperate by her situation, she became an _aristocratic courtezan_,

freely sacrificing her person to every nobleman and gentleman of rank

who chose to pay liberally for her favors. In this manner she

subsisted for a time in luxury--but at last, her patrons (as is always

the case) grew tired of her; she had become

"Like a thrice-told tale,

Vexing the dull ears of a drowsy man,"

and was again thrown upon the world without resources. Her indomitable

pride still clung to her, through all her misfortunes; and though she

plainly saw that her amours with the aristocracy were at an end

forever, she disdained to seek meaner lovers among the humbler

classes. Every offer made to her by men of medium rank, was spurned by

the proud harlot with supreme contempt. 'I am a companion for

nobility--not for the grovelling masses,' she would reply, in answer

to all such offers; nor did the pinchings of want and hunger even for

a moment shake her resolution, or disarm her prejudices. She might,

had she been disposed, have still lived in comfort and even splendor,

by becoming an inmate of some fashionable brothel; but as in such an

establishment she would be required to bestow her favors

indiscriminately on men of all ranks, who could pay for the same, she

recoiled from the idea with disgust. Thus did the pride of this

singular woman triumph over her wants and poverty; when on the very

verge of starvation, with the means of relief within her grasp, the

thought--'I am of noble birth,' would sustain her, and enable her to

resist successfully the longings of hunger and the sufferings

incidental to a homeless life. No scrupulous delicacy prevented her

from accepting any assistance, pecuniary or otherwise, that might be

offered to her; she even did not hesitate to ask for charity, in tones

of _affected_ humility; but the all-pervading principle, PRIDE OF

BIRTH, implanted within her breast, imperiously restrained her from

bestowing the favors of her patrician person upon 'vulgar plebeians;'

and, in consequence, she had sunk lower and lower in want, destitution

and misery, until driven, on that terrible winter's night, to

supplicate for a slight and temporary relief at the door of one whom

she had formerly so much despised, but on whom she was now so

dependent.

"It was a cold evening, and her ladyship and myself were seated before

a comfortable fire. An abundance of wholesome food, and every comfort

which it was in my power to procure for her, had improved her

appearance greatly. Her form had regained much of its natural

roundness, and her countenance had recovered all its original beauty.

She was gazing pensively into the fire; while I regarded _her_ with an

eye of admiration, and a heart full of amorous longings. At length I

broke the silence. 'To-morrow night, madam,' said I, 'the week for

which you stipulated, will have expired.' She sighed deeply, and

murmured, in an almost inaudible tone, 'It is so, indeed.' Noticing

the sigh which accompanied her words, a frown of displeasure gathered

on my brow; but it was almost instantly dispelled, in the delight I

felt at my approaching happiness. 'Yes,' I continued, 'to-morrow night

I shall be the happiest of men; but madam, why delay until to-morrow

night that felicity which may as well be enjoyed to-night? You can

never be more beautiful or more voluptuous than you are at this

moment.' During the utterance of these words, I had drawn my chair

close to hers, and encircled her enchanting waist with my arm; I felt

her heart throbbing wildly beneath my hand, which had invaded the

snowy regions of her swelling charms--and I took it to be the wild

throbbing of passion. We were alone--not a soul was stirring in the

house; propitious moment! How longingly I gazed upon her dewy lips,

which reminded me of the lines in Moore's _Anacreon_--which, I

suppose, is all Latin and Greek to you, comrades:--

"Her lips, so rich in blisses,

Sweet petitioners for kisses!

Pouting nest of bland persuasion,

Ripely suing Love's invasion."

And they did not long sue in vain; for such vigorous salute as I gave

them would have put even Captain St. Clair to the blush. While thus

tasting the honey of the sweetest and most luscious pair of lips in

the three kingdoms, I fancied that I felt her trembling with delight

in my arms; but too soon did I become aware that she was only

shuddering with disgust; for by a vigorous effort she struggled from

my embrace, and, breathless and panting, said--'Not now, Simpson, not

now, I entreat, I implore you! To-morrow night, the week's exemption

which I craved, will be completed,--then--then--at this hour--you

may--you will find me in my chamber; _then_, so help me God! I will

offer no resistance; but now, not now!' I surveyed her ladyship with

some surprise; her eyes sparkled like diamonds, and her face, neck and

bosom were suffused with a ruddy, glowing hue. 'As you please, madam,'

I coldly rejoined, for I was provoked at her violent and unexpected

resistance--'as you please; but remember, I am no longer to be trifled

with. To-morrow night be it, then; and see that you do not repeat this

obstinacy of conduct, for I will then accomplish my object, even if I

have to resort to force and violence!' '_I will not then resist you_,

I swear it!' said she, with much solemnity of manner, and then

added--'one favor I will ask of you: permit me to remain all day

to-morrow in my chamber, and do not even attempt to see me, until

twelve o'clock to-morrow night, at which hour you will find me waiting

for your appearance.' I agreed to this request; and she bade me

good-night in a tone almost cheerful, as she left the room to seek her

chamber.

"The next day and the next evening passed;--the midnight hour arrived.

I closed my house, and repaired to the chamber which had been

assigned to the use of my lady guest. Finding the door unlocked, I

softly entered the apartment; it was a spacious room, tolerably well

furnished, and the bed was shrouded by muslin curtains; a lighted

candle stood upon the table; glancing around I saw nobody. 'She is in

bed,' thought I, and every nerve in my body thrilled with delight at

the thought. I approached the bed, and drew aside the curtain. There

she lay--but how very still! 'She sleeps,' thought I, somewhat

surprised; and bending over in the dim light of the unsnuffed candle,

I kissed her lips--heavens! what made them so very cold--and why was

the hand which I had lasciviously laid upon her bosom, dampened with a

warm liquid? I rushed to the table, seized the candle, and returned to

the bed-side. There she lay--DEAD! The life-blood was welling from an

awful gash in her left breast; her right hand grasped a dagger--the

instrument of her death; the bed on which she lay was literally soaked

with her blood, and my hand was stained with it. Then I comprehended

her words--'_I will not then resist you!_' I staggered back,

horror-stricken; the shadow of remorse for the first time darkened my

soul; I would have wrested the dagger from her lifeless hand, and

plunged it into my own heart, but in the agonies of death she had

clutched it too firmly to admit of my easily tearing it from her

grasp. I turned from the bed, and again placed the candle upon the

table; I sat down by it, with the cold perspiration starting from

every pore. Ha! what is this? a letter, and addressed to me? I had not

observed it before. Eagerly I tore it open, and instantly recognized

the elegant handwriting of her ladyship--not a blot, not a misformed

letter marred the beautiful chirography of the missive; it was written

with the same grace and precision that had in former days

characterized her ladyship's notes of invitation to her splendid

parties. As near as I can remember, it read as follows:--

"'Death is preferable to the dishonor of your vile embraces. Were you

a man of birth, gladly would I accept the protection of your arms; but

Lady Adelaide Hawley can never become the mistress of a menial. I

welcome death, as it will preserve me from staining the purity of my

noble blood by cohabitation with such as _thou_ art. May heaven pity

and forgive me!'

"After I had read this characteristic note, I reflected deeply upon

the tragic event--her suicide. Innocent as I was of her death, might I

not be arrested as her murderer?[B] Circumstances were strong against

me; how could I prove my innocence? Many men have been hung on

circumstantial evidence less strong. Though I had escaped detection on

a murder which I had actually committed, I now feared that I should

suffer for a deed of which I was not guilty. The gallows arose before

my excited fancy, in all its terrors; my throat seemed encircled by

the fatal rope.--I determined to fly the country; instantly acting

upon this impulse, I left the chamber, and hastily collected together

all my money (which was considerable) and valuables. Then I left the

house, and seeking a safe asylum in an obscure party of the city,

remained there until an opportunity was afforded me to take ship to

America. I arrived here--soon spent all my money--was hauled up for a

murder--was convicted of manslaughter only, and did the State service

for a period of ten years in the stone institution at Charlestown;

served out my time--and here I am. Now, comrades, you have heard my

story; that it has been a long one, and a dry one, I grant--at all

events, the narration of it has made _me_ confoundedly dry. Here's a

health to jolly thieves all the world over, and confusion to honesty,

the law, and the police!"

[B] Acute and sagacious as Jew Mike was, it did not occur to him, in his

trepidation and alarm, that the note which he had just read, and which

was in Lady Hawley's own handwriting, would clearly exonerate him from

all suspicion of his having murdered her. But guilt is sometimes

singularly short-sighted, and Mike, as cunning a villain as he was,

threw aside or perhaps destroyed the only evidence he could have

possibly produced to substantiate his innocence.

Jew Mike did honor to his own toast in a bumper of brandy; nor were the

others backward in following his example. Sow Nance, who had just awoke

from a sound sleep, swore it was the most capital story she had ever

heard in her life, which opinion she enforced by many oaths that we need

not repeat. 'Charcoal Bill' and 'Indian Marth' were loud in their

expressions of delight; and Jew Mike had the satisfaction of perceiving

that he had pleased his audience, and made himself the hero of the

night. A general conversation followed, which lasted until the Jew, as

chairman of the meeting and Captain of the _Grabbers_, called the

assembly to order, and announced that Sow Nance had the

floor;--whereupon silence was restored, and that lady gave utterance to

the following words, in a hoarse voice.--Her remarks were copiously

interspersed with oaths, which, out of respect for the reader's feelings

and our own credit, we omit:--

"Well, gals and fellers, being as how my Mike here has been a blowin'

off his gas, I might as well blow mine. You all know how I first came

to be se-duced, don't yer? It was a rich State street lawyer wot first

did it, when I was 'leven years old. Ha, ha, ha! a jolly old cock he

was, with a bald head and a face all over red pimples--he used to be

mighty fond of us girls, I tell yer. Maybe I didn't use to suck the

money out of him, by threatenin' to _blow_ on him--well, I did! Yer

all know how I had a young-'un, and how--ha, ha, ha!--the brat was

found, the next day after it was born, dead in the _Black Sea_; it

never died no nat'ral death that young-'un didn't, yer can bet yer

life; the old Cor'ner wasn't far out of the way when he said in his

werdict that the child had been strangled! The State street lawyer was

its father, I believe, tho' I can't say for certain, I had so many

partick'lar friends; for if I _ain't_ werry good-looking, I've got

winnin' ways. I came from a first-rate family, I did; my father was

hung for killing my mother--one of my brothers has also danced a horn

pipe in the air, and another is under sentence of death, off South,

for beating a woman's brains out with a fire shovel, and choking her

five children with a dishcloth. He's one of the true breed, he is. I

ain't no dishonor to my family, either; for besides that strangling

business, (mind, I didn't say _I_ did it!) I once pitched a drunken

sailor down stairs, which accidentally broke his neck, after I had

lightened his pockets of what small change he had about him.--To tell

the honest truth, I'm rather too ugly to make much money by doing

business myself; so I've gone into the business of picking up young,

good-looking gals, coaxing them off, and getting them into the houses

of my regular customers, who pay me well, at so much a head. My best

customer is the rich Mr. Tickels, who lives in South street; many's

the young gal I've carried to him, and many's the dollar I've earned

by it. Look here--do you see this five dollar gold piece? I earned it

this morning by coaxing a gal to go with me to Mr. Tickel's house; she

was a little beauty, I tell yer, and I'll bet she won't come out of

that house the same as she went in, no how. She was a fruit gal, but

she wasn't one of us; her name, I believe was Fanny--"

"Blood and battering-rams!"

This singular exclamation was made by the comical looking old man, who

had entered the "Pig Pen" unperceived, and had been seated in the corner

unnoticed by any of the company. He had arisen from his seat, and stood

in an attitude which betokened profound interest and great astonishment.

For a moment the whole gang, male and female, regarded him with surprise

and suspicion; then Jew Mike sprang forward, seized him by the throat,

shook him strongly, and in a rough, fierce voice, demanded:--

"Death and the devil, old scoundrel, how came you here? Who are

you?--are you a police spy--one of Marshal Threekey's gang? Speak,

d----n you, before I break every bone in your accursed old carcass!"

It was a singular contrast, between the great, powerful ruffian, and the

little old man--nevertheless, the latter individual (who, the reader

need scarcely be told, was no other than our eccentric friend, the

Corporal,) did not tamely submit to such rough treatment; extricating

himself, with much agility, from the grasp of the Jew, he dealt that

worthy such a quick and stinging blow in the region of his left ear,

that it laid him sprawling on the floor, at the same moment exclaiming--

"Skulls and skeletons! do you take me for a child? Nay, come on again,

if you are so disposed, and by the nose of Napoleon! I'll beat you to a

jelly!"

It is difficult to say what might have been the fate of the gallant

Corporal, had a second encounter taken place, for the Jew arose from the

floor with a howl of rage, his dark face livid with passion. But,

fortunately for our friend, at this crisis there stepped forward a big,

brawny, double-jointed Irishman, with a fist like a shoulder of mutton;

this gentleman gloried in the title of 'Cod-mouth Pat,' in humorous

allusion to the peculiar formation of his 'potato trap,' an aperture in

his head which might have been likened either to a cellar door or a coal

scuttle.

"Och, be the powers, Misther Jew Mike," said Pat, placing himself

between the Corporal and his gigantic antagonist--"be asy, and lave the

owld gintlman alone; he's a brave little man intirely, and it's myself

that'll fight for him. Whoop! show me the man that 'od harm my friend,

and be the holy poker, and that's a good oath, I'll raise a lump on his

head as big as the hill of Howth, and that's no small one!"

The good-hearted Irishman's interference saved the Corporal from a

severe beating, if not from being killed outright--for the Jew dared not

engage in a personal conflict with a man of Pat's resolution and

strength. Yet any ordinary observer could not have failed to notice the

look of deadly vengeance that gleamed in his eyes, indicating that he

would not soon forget or forgive the blow he had received.

At that moment, a loud noise resembling the crash of decanters and

glasses, mingled with loud oaths and yells of defiance, which sounds

proceeded from the adjoining dance cellar, plainly indicated that one of

those "bloody rows" for which Ann street is famous, had commenced. Such

a scene was too much the element of Cod-mouth Pat for him to remain

tranquil during its progress; with an unearthly yell he grasped a short,

thick cudgel which he always carried, and leaving the "Pig Pen," plunged

into the thickest of the fight. Many a black eye and broken head

attested the vigor of his arm; but the glory of his achievements did not

screen him from being borne to the watchhouse, nor did his valor prevent

the magistrate in the morning from inflicting upon him a very decent

fine, which drew from him the indignant remark that--"'Tis a great

country, any how, where a man can't have a ginteel bit of a fight

without paying for it!"

The Corporal's case again looked desperate, when Pat left the "Pig Pen,"

for he was then without a protector from the vengeance of Jew Mike. But

the Jew did not appear inclined to assail the old man personally, though

his ferocious eyes still gleamed with rage. Standing apart, he held a

whispered conversation with Sow Nance, during which the Corporal could

occasionally overhear the words--'spy,' 'danger,' 'police,' 'murder,'

and the like. At last they seemed to arrive at some definite conclusion;

for the Jew came forward, and said--

"Old fellow, whoever you are, you have heard too much of our private

discourse, for our safety.--We must confine you, until such time as you

may succeed in convincing us that you meant no foul play in thus

intruding into our secret rendezvous."

The Corporal began to speak, but the Jew fiercely commanded him to be

silent. Meanwhile, Sow Nance had procured a rope, and ere the old man

was aware of her intention, she had seized and pinioned his arms with

great dexterity.

"Into the _Black Hole_ with him!" shouted the Jew. The poor Corporal was

hurried from the room, through a low, narrow door, along a dark, winding

passage, and soon found himself in a spacious cellar, crowded with

negroes, who were drinking "blue ruin" and smoking vile cigars. This

resort of the "colored society" was a place of the most degraded and

vicious kind, frequented by the lowest of the black population of Ann

street. At that period, respectable public houses for the exclusive

accommodation of the colored aristocracy, were very rare; and it is only

recently that the enterprise and public spirit of Mr. William E. Ambush

has established a _recherche_ and elegant Saloon in Belknap street,

bearing the poetical cognomen of "_The Gazelle_." We allude to this

latter place for the purpose of showing that however degraded may be the

colored denizens of Ann street, and however low their resorts, there are

nevertheless those of the same complexion who are elevated in their

notions of propriety, and strictly exclusive in their associations.

"Hallo, here--where's Pete York?" demanded the Jew, looking around upon

the sable assembly with an air of authority.

A small, very black and hideous looking negro stepped forward in answer

to the name, with a grin that would not have disgraced the very devil

himself.

"Dat's me, master," said he. (It may be as well to remark here, that

this negro was soon afterwards sentenced to be hung for an atrocious

murder, in Ann street. His sentence was, however, commuted by the

Governor to imprisonment for life. He is now comfortably located in the

Charlestown State Prison.)

"Well, then, you black scorpion, I wish you to take charge of this old

fellow, and let him not escape, as you value your life. Keep him here

safely for a day or two, and I'll reward you well for your trouble.

Sooner than let him escape, _kill him_--do you hear?"

The negro _did_ hear, and perfectly comprehended, also. He replied not

in words, but in expressive pantomime. Drawing a knife from his belt, he

passed his finger approvingly along its glittering edge--then he drew it

lightly across his own throat, in the immediate vicinity of his

windpipe; by which actions he meant to intimate that should the old

gentleman, with whose guardianship he had the honor to be entrusted,

manifest the least inclination to "give him the slip," he, Mr. Peter

York, would, in the most scientific manner, merely cut his throat from

ear to ear, as a particular token of his warm personal regard. Jew Mike

appeared perfectly satisfied with the assurance thus eloquently

conveyed, and, accompanied by Sow Nance, left the cellar, leaving the

Corporal to the tender mercies of as desperate a band of villains and

cut-throats as ever prowled about in the dark alleys and underground

dens of Ann street.

"Now, my good fellow," said the old gentleman, addressing the negro

whose prisoner he now was--"you had better instantly unbind me, and

suffer me to take my departure from this infernal trap. Give me my

liberty, and I will pay you ten times the sum that your Jew friend can

afford to give you for detaining me here. What say you?"

"Oh, you shut up!" responded Pete York--"you s'pose I'm going to b'lieve

any such gas as dat? You look like paying more money than Jew Mike, and

not a decent coat on your back! Hush up your mouf, or you'll get this

knife a-twixt your ribs in less than no time."

The black ruffian, in order to convince his prisoner that he meant what

he said, pressed the sharp point of his knife so closely to the

Corporal's breast, that it penetrated the skin. Mr. York, having thus

practically admonished his victim to preserve silence, (which the

Corporal thought it best to do, under the circumstances,) called to

another negro, who was indulging in deep potations at the bar, in

company with his "ladye love," a wench whose personal attractions

consisted of a knotty head, flat nose, and mouth of immoderate

dimensions--and that she _was_ attractive to her lover, was afterwards

manifested by the fact that in a fit of jealousy he murdered a rival in

her affections; for which amusement he was hung in the yard of the

Leverett street jail on the 25th day of May, 1849, in the presence of a

very jovial party, who were highly delighted with the exhibition.

"Wash Goode," cried Mr. Peter York, addressing that gentleman with a

familiar abbreviation of his patriotic Christian name--"look yeah, a

moment, will you nigger?"

Mr. Washington Goode crossed the cellar, and desired to know in what way

he could be serviceable to his particular friend and boon companion, Mr.

Peter York. The latter gentleman explained himself in a few words.

"Jew Mike has put this old white man under my charge," said he, "for a

few days, and I don't know where the h----l to keep him. What shall I do

with the old son of a----?"

"Why, put him in de coal-hole, to be sure," replied the other, with a

boisterous laugh at his own ingenious suggestion.

Mr. York signified his approval of this plan, and dragging the poor

Corporal into the dark passage which he had traversed in going to the

cellar, he seized a large iron ring, opened a trap door, and violently

pushed his victim into the dark and yawning chasm. Then he shut down the

trap door, securely fastened it and departed.

The unfortunate Corporal fell a distance of about eight feet, and landed

upon a soft, damp bed of earth, with but little personal injury. It will

be recollected that his arms had been pinioned by Sow Nance; but, by a

desperate effort, the old man succeeded in freeing himself from his

bonds. He then essayed to examine and explore the dismal pit into which

he had been thrown--which, in the intense darkness that prevailed, was a

task of no little danger. However, he cautiously began to grope about,

and soon became satisfied that the place was of considerable extent.

It will readily be inferred that our friend Corporal Grimsby was a man

of dauntless courage; but, notwithstanding this, a thrill of terror

nearly paralysed his limbs, when, while exploring the dungeon into which

he had been thrown, his feet came in contact with an object, which, on

examination, he discovered to be a human skeleton. The dread of being

left to starve and perish in that dismal den, in such awful company,

well nigh overcame both his philosophy and courage; and seating himself

upon the damp earth, he abandoned himself to those feelings of

despondency naturally engendered by his situation.

A man placed in such circumstances, in the midst of intense darkness,

can "take no note of time." An hour of horror will sometimes seem an

age, while a week of unalloyed pleasure will often glide by seemingly

with the same rapidity as a few fleeting moments. It may have been one

hour--it may have been ten--that the Corporal sat on the floor of his

dungeon; when suddenly he was startled by the noise of the trap-door

above his head being opened, and looking up, he beheld Sow Nance gazing

down upon him, holding in her hand a lantern. After regarding him

intently for a few moments, she thus addressed him:--

"Say, old chap, what'll yer give me if I help yer to 'scape from this

hole? Yer don't look as if yer had any money--but if yer have, pay me

well, and I'll get you out."

"Lower down a ladder or a rope, and raise me from this infernal trap,

and you shall have this purse--see, 'tis full of gold!" replied the

Corporal, at the same time producing from his pocket a purse which was

evidently well lined with the "needful."

Nance uttered an exclamation of surprise and pleasure, and then

disappeared; in a few minutes she returned and lowered a ladder into the

pit; the Corporal rapidly ascended, and soon stood at the side of his

deliverer, whom he could not avoid thanking warmly, as he gave her the

purse. Bidding him follow her, she conducted him through the dark

passage; they entered the "Pig Pen," which was empty--passed through the

dance cellar without attracting any attention, and to the intense joy of

the Corporal, he found himself standing in the open air, with the sun

shining brightly, and no one to hinder his departure from those corrupt

regions of sin and horror.

He distinctly remembered that Sow Nance had boasted of having enticed a

young girl to the abode of Mr. Tickels in South street. Now this latter

individual was known to him as a libertine and a villain; and inwardly

praying that he might not be too late to rescue his fair young friend

(for he doubted not it was Fanny Aubrey,) from the power of such a

monster, in season to preserve her virtue undefiled, he made the best of

his way to South street. The reader knows how he rushed into the room

just as Tickels was preparing to consummate the outrage, and how he laid

the villain sprawling upon the floor, exclaiming--

"Broad-swords and bomb-shells! I am just in time!"

We have now seen the manner in which Corporal Grimsby discovered the

whereabouts of Fanny Aubrey: and the mystery of his having arrived at a

moment so very opportune, is explained.