1. SHOW YOUR LOVE.--All life manifests itself. As certainly as a live
tree will put forth leaves in the spring, so certainly will a living
love show itself. Many a noble man toils early and late to earn bread
and position for his wife. He hesitates at no weariness for her sake.
He justly thinks that such industry and providence give a better
expression of his love than he could by caressing her and letting the
grocery bills go unpaid. He fills the cellar and pantry. He drives and
pushes his business. He never dreams that he is actually starving his
wife to death. He may soon have a woman left to superintend his home,
but his wife is dying. She must be kept alive by the same process that
called her into being. Recall and repeat the little attentions and
delicate compliments that once made you so agreeable, and that fanned
her love into a consuming flame. It is not beneath the dignity of the
skillful physician to study all the little symptoms, and order all the
little round of attentions that check the waste of strength and brace
the staggering constitution. It is good work for a husband to cherish
his wife.
[Illustration: TALKING AFTER MARRIAGE.]
2. CONSULT WITH YOUR WIFE.--She is apt to be as right as you are, and
frequently able to add much to your stock of wisdom. In any event she
appreciates your attentions.
3. STUDY TO KEEP HER YOUNG.--It can be done. It is not work, but
worry, that wears. Keep a brave, true heart between her and all harm.
4. HELP TO BEAR HER BURDENS.--Bear one another's burdens, and so
fulfill the law of love. Love seeks opportunities to do for the loved
object. She has the constant care of your children. She is ordained
by the Lord to stand guard over them. Not a disease can appear in the
community without her taking the alarm. Not a disease can come over
the threshold without her instantly springing into the mortal combat.
If there is a deficiency anywhere it comes out of her pleasure. Her
burdens are everywhere. Look for them, that you may lighten them.
5. MAKE YOURSELF HELPFUL BY THOUGHTFULNESS.--Remember to bring into
the house your best smile and sunshine. It is good for you, and it
cheers up the home. There is hardly a nook in the house that has not
been carefully hunted through to drive out everything that might annoy
you. The dinner which suits, or ought to suit you, has not come on the
table of itself. It represents much thoughtfulness and work. You can
do no more manly thing than find some way of expressing, in word or
look, your appreciation of it.
6. EXPRESS YOUR WILL, NOT BY COMMANDS, BUT BY SUGGESTIONS.--It is
God's order that you should be the head of the family. You are clothed
with authority. But this does not authorize you to be stern and harsh,
as an officer in the army. Your authority is the dignity of love.
When it is not clothed in love it ceases to have the substance of
authority. A simple suggestion that may embody a wish, an opinion or
an argument, becomes one who reigns over such a kingdom as yours.
7. SEEK TO REFINE YOUR NATURE.--It is no slander to say that many men
have wives much more refined than themselves. This is natural in the
inequalities of life. Other qualities may compensate for any defect
here. But you need have no defect in refinement. Preserve the
gentleness and refinement of your wife as a rich legacy for your
children, and in so doing you will lift yourself to higher levels.
8. BE A GENTLEMAN AS WELL AS A HUSBAND.--The signs and bronze and
callouses of toil are no indications that you are not a gentleman.
The soul of gentlemanliness is a kindly feeling toward others, that
prompts one to secure their comfort. That is why the thoughtful
peasant lover is always so gentlemanly, and in his love much above
himself.
9. STAY AT HOME.--Habitual absence during the evenings is sure to
bring sorrow. If your duty or business calls you you have the promise
that you will be kept in all your ways. But if you go out to mingle
with other society, and leave your wife at home alone, or with the
children and servants, know that there is no good in store for you.
She has claims upon you that you can not afford to allow to go to
protest. Reverse the case. You sit down alone after having waited
all day for your wife's return, and think of her as reveling in gay
society, and see if you can keep out all the doubts as to what takes
her away. If your home is not as attractive as you want it, you are
a principal partner. Set yourself about the work of making it
attractive.
10. TAKE YOUR WIFE WITH YOU INTO SOCIETY.--Seclusion begets
morbidness. She needs some of the life that comes from contact with
society. She must see how other people appear and act. It often
requires an exertion for her to go out of her home, but it is good for
her and for you. She will bring back more sunshine. It is wise to rest
sometimes. When the Arab stops for his dinner he unpacks his camel.
Treat your wife with as much consideration.
[Illustration]
[Illustration: TIRED OF LIFE.]
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