1. LOVE.--There is no greater or more profound reality than love. Why
that reality should be obscured by mere sentimentalism, with all
its train of absurdities is incomprehensible. There is no nobler
possession than the love of another. There is no higher gift from one
human being to another than love. The gift and the possession are true
sanctifiers of life, and should be worn as precious jewels, without
affectation and without bashfulness. For this reason there is nothing
to be ashamed of in a love letter, provided it be sincere.
2. FORFEITS.--No man need consider that he forfeits dignity if he
speaks with his whole heart: no woman need fear she forfeits her
womanly attributes if she responds as her heart bids her respond.
"Perfect love casteth out fear" is as true now as when the maxim was
first given to the world.
3. TELLING THEIR LOVE.--The generality of the sex is, love to be
loved; how are they to know the fact that they are loved unless they
are told? To write a sensible love letter requires more talent than
to solve, with your pen, a profound problem in philosophy. Lovers must
not then expect much from each other's epistles.
4. CONFIDENTIAL.--Ladies and gentlemen who correspond with each other
should never be guilty of exposing any of the contents of any letters
written expressing confidence, attachment or love. The man who
confides in a lady and honors her with his confidence should be
treated with perfect security and respect, and those who delight in
showing their confidential letters to others are unworthy, heartless
and unsafe companions.
5. RETURN OF LETTERS.--If letters were written under circumstances
which no longer exist and all confidential relations are at an end,
then all letters should be promptly returned.
6. HOW TO BEGIN A LOVE LETTER.--How to begin a love letter has been no
doubt the problem of lovers and suitors of all ages and nations. Fancy
the youth of Young America with lifted pen, thinking how he shall
address his beloved. Much depends upon this letter. What shall he say,
and how shall he say it, is the great question. Perseverance, however,
will solve the problem and determine results.
7. FORMS OF BEGINNING A LOVE LETTER.--Never say, "My Dearest Nellie,"
"My Adored Nellie," or "My Darling Nellie," until Nellie has first
called you "My Dear," or has given you to understand that such
familiar terms are permissible. As a rule a gentleman will never
err if he says "Dear Miss Nellie," and if the letters are cordially
reciprocated the "Miss" may in time be omitted, or other familiar
terms used instead. In addressing a widow "Dear Madam," or, "My Dear
Madam," will be a proper form until sufficient intimacy will justify
the use of other terms.
8. RESPECT.--A lady must always be treated with respectful delicacy,
and a gentleman should never use the term "Dear" or "My Dear" under
any circumstances unless he knows it is perfectly acceptable or a long
and friendly acquaintance justifies it.
9. HOW TO FINISH A LETTER.--A letter will be suggested by the remarks
on how to begin one. "Yours respectfully," "Yours truly," "Yours
sincerely," "Yours affectionately," "Yours ever affectionately,"
"Yours most affectionately," "Ever yours," "Ever your own," or
"Yours," are all appropriate, each depending upon the beginning of the
letter. It is difficult to see any phrase which could be added to
them which would carry more meaning than they contain. People can sign
themselves "adorers" and such like, but they do so at the peril of
good taste. It is not good that men or women "worship" each other--if
they succeed in preserving reciprocal love and esteem they will have
cause for great contentment.
10. PERMISSION.--No young man should ever write to a young lady any
letter, formal or informal, unless he has first sought her permission
to do so.
11. SPECIAL FORMS.--We give various forms or models of love letters to
be _studied, not copied._ We have given no replies to the forms given,
as every letter written will naturally suggest an answer. A careful
study will be a great help to many who have not enjoyed the advantages
of a literary education.
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