[Illustration: THE HOUSEHOLD OF SIR THO^[.S] MORE]
_Chelsea, June 18th._
On asking Mr. _Gunnel_ to what Use I should put this fayr _Libellus_,
he did suggest my making it a Kinde of family Register, wherein to
note the more important of our domestick Passages, whether of Joy
or Griefe--my Father's Journies and Absences--the Visits of learned
Men, theire notable Sayings, etc. "You are ready at the Pen, Mistress
_Margaret_," he was pleased to say; "and I woulde humblie advise your
journalling in the same fearless Manner in the which you framed that
Letter which soe well pleased the _Bishop of Exeter_, that he sent
you a Portugal Piece. 'Twill be well to write it in English, which
'tis expedient for you not altogether to negleckt, even for the more
honourable Latin."
Methinks I am close upon Womanhood.... "Humblie advise," quotha! to me,
that have so oft humblie sued for his Pardon, and sometimes in vayn!
'Tis well to make trial of _Gonellus_ his "humble" Advice: albeit, our
daylie Course is so methodicall, that 'twill afford scant Subject for
the Pen--_Vitam continet una Dies_.
* * * * *
... As I traced the last Word, methoughte I heard the well-known Tones
of _Erasmus_ his pleasant Voyce; and, looking forthe of my Lattice,
did indeede beholde the deare little Man coming up from the River Side
with my Father, who, because of the Heat, had given his Cloak to a tall
Stripling behind him to bear. I flew up Stairs, to advertise Mother,
who was half in and half out of her grogram Gown, and who stayed me to
clasp her Owches; so that, by the Time I had followed her down Stairs,
we founde 'em alreadie in the Hall.
So soon as I had kissed their Hands, and obtayned their Blessings,
the tall Lad stept forthe, and who should he be but _William Roper_,
returned from my Father's Errand over-seas! He hath grown hugelie, and
looks mannish; but his Manners are worsened insteade of bettered by
forayn Travell; for, insteade of his old Franknesse, he hung upon Hand
till _Father_ bade him come forward; and then, as he went his Rounds,
kissing one after another, stopt short when he came to me, twice made
as though he would have saluted me, and then held back, making me looke
so stupid, that I could have boxed his Ears for his Payns. 'Speciallie
as _Father_ burst out a-laughing, and cried, "The third Time's lucky!"
After Supper, we took deare _Erasmus_ entirely over the House, in a
Kind of family Procession, e'en from the Buttery and Scalding-house
to our own deare _Academia_, with its cool green Curtain flapping in
the Evening Breeze, and blowing aside, as though on Purpose to give
a glimpse of the cleare-shining _Thames_! _Erasmus_ noted and admired
the Stone Jar, placed by _Mercy Giggs_ on the Table, full of blue
and yellow Irises, scarlet Tiger-Lilies, Dog-Roses, Honeysuckles,
Moonwort, and Herb-Trinity; and alsoe our various Desks, eache in its
own little Retirement,--mine own, in speciall, so pleasantly situate!
He protested, with everie Semblance of Sincerity, he had never seene
so pretty an Academy. I should think not, indeede! _Bess_, _Daisy_,
and I, are of Opinion, that there is not likelie to be such another
in the World. He glanced, too, at the Books on our Desks; _Bessy's_
being _Livy_; _Daisy's_, _Sallust_; and mine, St. _Augustine_, with
_Father's_ Marks where I was to read, and where desist. He tolde
_Erasmus_, laying his Hand fondlie on my Head, "Here is one who knows
what is implied in the Word Trust." Dear _Father_, well I may! He
added, "there was no Law against laughing in _his Academia_, for that
his Girls knew how to be merry and wise."
From the House to the new Building, the Chapel and Gallery, and thence
to visitt all the dumb Kinde, from the great horned Owls to _Cecy's_
pet Dormice. _Erasmus_ was amused at some of theire Names, but doubted
whether _Duns Scotus_ and the _Venerable Bede_ would have thoughte
themselves complimented in being made Name-fathers to a couple of Owls;
though he admitted that _Argus_ and _Juno_ were goode Cognomens for
Peacocks. _Will Roper_ hath broughte Mother a pretty little forayn
Animal called a Marmot, but she sayd she had noe Time for suchlike
Playthings, and bade him give it to his little Wife. Methinks, I being
neare sixteen and he close upon twenty, we are too old for those
childish Names now, nor am I much flattered at a Present not intended
for me; however, I shall be kind to the little Creature, and, perhaps,
grow fond of it, as 'tis both harmlesse and diverting.
[Illustration: Erasmus and the Peacocks.]
To return, howbeit, to _Erasmus_; _Cecy_, who had hold of his Gown,
and had alreadie, through his familiar Kindnesse and her own childish
Heedlessness, somewhat transgrest Bounds, began now in her Mirthe to
fabricate a Dialogue, she pretended to have overhearde, between _Argus_
and _Juno_ as they stoode pearcht on a stone Parapet. _Erasmus_ was
entertayned with her Garrulitie for a while, but at length gentlie
checkt her, with "Love the Truth, little Mayd, love the Truth, or, if
thou liest, let it be with a Circumstance," a Qualification which made
_Mother_ stare and _Father_ laugh.
Sayth _Erasmus_, "There is no Harm in a Fabella, Apologus, or Parabola,
so long as its Character be distinctlie recognised for such, but
contrariwise, much Goode; and the same hath been sanctioned, not only
by the wiser Heads of _Greece_ and _Rome_, but by our deare Lord
Himself. Therefore, _Cecilie_, whom I love exceedinglie, be not abasht,
Child, at my Reproof, for thy Dialogue between the two Peacocks was
innocent no less than ingenious, till thou wouldst have insisted that
they, in sooth, sayd Something like what thou didst invent. Therein
thou didst Violence to the Truth, which St. _Paul_ hath typified by a
Girdle, to be worn next the Heart, and that not only confineth within
due Limits, but addeth Strength. So now be Friends; wert thou more
than eleven and I no Priest, thou shouldst be my little Wife, and
darn my Hose, and make me sweet Marchpane, such as thou and I love.
But, oh! this pretty _Chelsea_! What Daisies! what Buttercups! what
joviall Swarms of Gnats! The Country all about is as nice and flat as
_Rotterdam_."
Anon, we sit down to rest and talk in the Pavilion.
Sayth _Erasmus_ to my _Father_, "I marvel you have never entered into
the King's Service in some publick Capacitie, wherein your Learning
and Knowledge, bothe of Men and Things, would not onlie serve your own
Interest, but that of your Friends and the Publick."
_Father_ smiled and made Answer, "I am better and happier as I am. As
for my Friends, I alreadie do for them alle I can, soe as they can
hardlie consider me in their Debt; and, for myself, the yielding to
theire Solicitations that I would putt myself forward for the Benefit
of the World in generall, would be like printing a Book at Request of
Friends, that the Publick may be charmed with what, in Fact, it values
at a Doit. The Cardinall offered me a Pension, as retaining Fee to
the King a little while back, but I tolde him I did not care to be a
mathematical Point, to have Position without Magnitude."
_Erasmus_ laught and sayd, "I woulde not have you the Slave of anie
King; howbeit, you mighte assist him and be useful to him."
"The Change of the Word," sayth _Father_, "does not alter the Matter; I
should _be_ a Slave, as completely as if I had a Collar rounde my Neck."
"But would not increased Usefulnesse," says _Erasmus_, "make you
happier?"
"Happier?" says _Father_, somewhat heating; "how can that be compassed
in a Way so abhorrent to my Genius? At present, I live as I will,
to which very few Courtiers can pretend. Half-a-dozen blue-coated
Serving-Men answer my Turn in the House, Garden, Field, and on the
River: I have a few strong Horses for Work, none for Show, plenty of
plain Food for a healthy Family, and enough, with a hearty Welcome,
for a score of Guests that are not dainty. The lengthe of my Wife's
Train infringeth not the Statute; and, for myself, I soe hate Bravery,
that my Motto is, 'Of those whom you see in Scarlet, not one is
happy.' I have a regular Profession, which supports my House, and
enables me to promote Peace and Justice; I have Leisure to chat with
my Wife, and sport with my Children; I have Hours for Devotion, and
Hours for Philosophie and the liberall Arts, which are absolutelie
medicinall to me, as Antidotes to the sharpe but contracted Habitts
of Mind engendered by the Law. If there be aniething in a Court Life
which can compensate for the Losse of anie of these Blessings, deare
_Desiderius_, pray tell me what it is, for I confesse I know not."
"You are a comicall Genius," says _Erasmus_.
"As for you," retorted _Father_, "you are at your olde Trick of arguing
on the wrong Side, as you did the firste Time we mett. Nay, don't we
know you can declaime backward and forwarde on the same Argument, as
you did on the _Venetian_ War?"
_Erasmus_ smiled quietlie, and sayd, "What coulde I do? The _Pope_
changed his holy Mind." Whereat _Father_ smiled too.
"What Nonsense you learned Men sometimes talk!" pursues _Father_.
"I--wanted at Court, quotha! Fancy a dozen starving Men with one
roasted Pig betweene them;--do you think they would be really glad
to see a Thirteenth come up, with an eye to a small Piece of the
Crackling? No; believe me, there is none that Courtiers are more
sincerelie respectfull to than the Man who avows he hath no Intention
of attempting to go Shares; and e'en him they care mighty little about,
for they love none with true Tendernesse save themselves."
"We shall see you at Court yet," says _Erasmus_.
Sayth _Father_, "Then I will tell you in what Guise. With a Fool's
Cap and Bells. Pish! I won't aggravate you, Churchman as you are, by
alluding to the Blessings I have which you have not; and I trow there
is as much Danger in taking you for serious when you are onlie playful
and ironicall as if you were _Plato_ himself."
Sayth _Erasmus_, after some Minutes' Silence, "I know full well that
you holde _Plato_, in manie Instances, to be sporting when I accept
him in very Deed and Truth. _Speculating_ he often was; as a brighte,
pure Flame must needs be struggling up, and, if it findeth no direct
Vent, come forthe of the Oven's Mouth. He was like a Man shut into a
Vault, running hither and thither, with his poor, flickering Taper,
agonizing to get forthe, and holding himself in readinesse to make a
Spring forward the Moment a Door should open. But it never did. 'Not
manie Wise are called.' He had clomb a Hill in the Darke, and stoode
calling to his Companions below, 'Come on, come on! this Way lies the
East; I am avised we shall see the Sun rise anon.' But they never
did. What a Christian he woulde have made! Ah! he is one now. He and
_Socrates_--the Veil long removed from their Eyes--are sitting at
_Jesus'_ Feet. _Sancte Socrates, ora pro nobis!_"
_Bessie_ and I exchanged Glances at this so strange Ejaculation; but
the Subjeckt was of such Interest, that we listened with deep Attention
to what followed.
Sayth _Father_, "Whether _Socrates_ were what _Plato_ painted him in
his Dialogues, is with me a great Matter of Doubte; but it is not of
Moment. When so many Contemporaries coulde distinguishe the fancifulle
from the fictitious, _Plato's_ Object could never have beene to
_deceive_. There is something higher in Art than gross Imitation. He
who attempteth it is always the leaste successfull; and his Failure
hath the Odium of a discovered Lie; whereas, to give an avowedlie
fabulous Narrative a Consistence within itselfe which permitts the
Reader to be, for the Time, voluntarilie deceived, is as artfulle as
it is allowable. Were I to construct a Tale, I woulde, as you sayd to
_Cecy_, lie with a Circumstance, but shoulde consider it noe Compliment
to have my Unicorns and Hippogriffs taken for live Animals. _Amicus
Plato, amicus Socrates, magis tamen amica Veritas._ Now, _Plato_ had
a much higher Aim than to give a very Pattern of _Socrates_ his snub
Nose. He wanted a Peg to hang his Thoughts upon----"
"A Peg? A Statue by _Phidias_," interrupts _Erasmus_.
"A Statue by _Phidias_, to clothe in the most beautiful Drapery," sayth
_Father_; "no Matter that the Drapery was his own, he wanted to show it
to the best Advantage, and to the Honour rather than Prejudice of the
Statue. And, having clothed the same, he got a Spark of _Prometheus_
his Fire, and made the aforesayd Statue walk and talk, to the Glory
of Gods and Men, and sate himself quietlie down in a Corner. By the
Way, _Desiderius_, why shouldst thou not submitt thy Subtletie to
the Rules of a Colloquy? Set _Eckius_ and _Martin Luther_ by the
Ears! Ha! Man, what Sport! Heavens! if I were to compound a Tale or a
Dialogue, what Crotchets and Quips of mine own woulde I not putt into
my Puppets' Mouths! and then have out my Laugh behind my Vizard, as
when we used to act Burlesques before _Cardinall Morton_. What rare
Sporte we had, one Christmas, with a Mummery we called the 'Triall of
Feasting'! _Dinner_ and _Supper_ were broughte up before my _Lord Chief
Justice_, charged with Murder. Theire Accomplices were _Plum-pudding_,
_Mince-pye_, _Surfeit_, _Drunkenness_, and suchlike. Being condemned
to hang by the Neck, I, who was _Supper_, stuft out with I cannot tell
you how manie Pillows, began to call lustilie for a Confessor, and, on
his stepping forthe, commenct a List of all the Fitts, Convulsions,
Spasms, Payns in the Head, and so forthe, I had inflicted on this one
and t'other. 'Alas! good Father,' says I, '_King John_ layd his Death
at my Door;--indeede, there's scarce a royall or noble House that hath
not a Charge agaynst me; and I'm sorelie afrayd' (giving a Poke at a
fat Priest that sate at my _Lord Cardinall's_ Elbow) 'I shall have the
Death of _that_ holy Man to answer for.'"
_Erasmus_ laughed, and sayd, "Did I ever tell you of the retort of
_Willibald Pirkheimer_? A Monk, hearing him praise me somewhat lavishly
to another, could not avoid expressing by his Looks great Disgust and
Dissatisfaction; and, on being askt whence they arose, confest he could
not, with Patience, heare the Commendation of a Man soe notoriously
fond of eating Fowls. 'Does he steal them?' says _Pirkheimer_. 'Surely
no,' says the Monk. 'Why, then,' quoth _Willibald_, 'I know of a Fox
who is ten times the greater Rogue; for, look you, he helps himself to
many a fat Hen from my Roost without ever offering to pay me. But tell
me now, dear Father, is it then a Sin to eat Fowls?' 'Most assuredlie
it is,' says the Monk, 'if you indulge in them to Gluttony.' 'Ah! if,
if!' quoth _Pirkheimer_. 'If stands stiff, as the _Lacedemonians_
told _Philip_ of _Macedon_; and 'tis not by eating Bread alone, my
dear Father, you have acquired that huge Paunch of yours. I fancy, if
all the fat Fowls that have gone into it could raise their Voices and
cackle at once, they woulde make Noise enow to drown the Drums and
Trumpets of an army.' Well may _Luther_ say," continued _Erasmus_,
laughing, "that theire fasting is easier to them than our eating to us;
seeing that every Man Jack of them hath to his Evening Meal two Quarts
of Beer, a Quart of Wine, and as manie as he can eat of Spice Cakes,
the better to relish his Drink. While I ... 'tis true my Stomach is
Lutheran, but my Heart is Catholic; that's as Heaven made me, and I'll
be judged by you alle, whether I am not as thin as a Weasel."
'Twas now growing dusk, and _Cecy's_ tame Hares were just beginning to
be on the alert, skipping across our Path, as we returned towards the
House, jumping over one another, and raysing 'emselves on theire hind
Legs to solicitt our Notice. _Erasmus_ was amused at theire Gambols,
and at our making them beg for Vine-tendrils; and _Father_ told him
there was hardlie a Member of the Householde who had not a dumb Pet
of some Sort. "I encourage the Taste in them," he sayd, "not onlie
because it fosters Humanitie and affords harmlesse Recreation, but
because it promotes Habitts of Forethoughte and Regularitie. No Child
or Servant of mine hath Liberty to adopt a Pet which he is too lazy
or nice to attend to himself. A little Management may enable even
a young Gentlewoman to do this, without soyling her Hands; and to
negleckt giving them proper Food at proper Times entayls a Disgrace
of which everie one of 'em would be ashamed. But, hark! there is the
Vesper-bell."
As we passed under a Pear-tree, _Erasmus_ told us, with much Drollerie,
of a Piece of boyish Mischief of his,--the Theft of some Pears off a
particular Tree, the Fruit of which the Superior of his Convent had
meant to reserve to himself. One Morning, _Erasmus_ had climbed the
Tree, and was feasting to his great Content, when he was aware of the
Superior approaching to catch him in the Fact; soe, quickly slid down
to the Ground, and made off in the opposite Direction, limping as he
went. The Malice of this Act consisted in its being the Counterfeit of
the Gait of a poor lame Lay Brother, who was, in fact, smartlie punisht
for _Erasmus_ his Misdeede. Our Friend mentioned this with a Kinde of
Remorse, and observed to my _Father_,--"Men laugh at the Sins of young
People and little Children, as if they were little Sins; albeit, the
Robbery of an Apple or Cherry-orchard is as much a breaking of the
Eighth Commandment as the stealing of a Leg of Mutton from a Butcher's
Stall, and ofttimes with far less Excuse. Our Church tells us, indeede,
of Venial Sins, such as the Theft of an Apple or a Pin; but, I think,"
(looking hard at _Cecilie_ and _Jack_,) "even the youngest among us
could tell how much Sin and Sorrow was brought into the World by
stealing an Apple."
At Bedtime, _Bess_ and I did agree in wishing that alle learned Men
were as apt to unite Pleasure with Profit in theire Talk as _Erasmus_.
There be some that can write after the Fashion of Paul, and others
preach like unto Apollos; but this, methinketh, is scattering Seed by
the Wayside, like the Great Sower.
_Tuesday._
'Tis singular, the Love that _Jack_ and _Cecy_ have for one another; it
resembleth that of Twins. _Jack_ is not forward at his Booke; on the
other Hand, he hath a Resolution of Character which _Cecy_ altogether
wants. Last Night, when _Erasmus_ spake of Children's Sins, I observed
her squeeze _Jack's_ Hand with alle her Mighte. I know what she was
thinking of. Having bothe beene forbidden to approach a favourite Part
of the River Bank which had given way from too much Use, one or the
other of 'em transgressed, as was proven by the smalle Footprints in
the Mud, as well as by a Nosegay of Flowers, that grow not, save by the
River; to wit, Purple Loosestrife, Cream-and-codlins, Scorpion-grass,
Water Plantain, and the like. Neither of 'em woulde confesse, and
_Jack_ was, therefore, sentenced to be whipt. As he walked off with
Mr. _Drew_, I observed _Cecy_ turn soe pale, that I whispered _Father_
I was certayn she was guilty. He made Answer, "Never mind, we cannot
beat a Girl, and 'twill answer the same Purpose; in flogging him, we
flog both." _Jack_ bore the firste Stripe or two, I suppose, well
enow, but at lengthe we hearde him cry out, on which _Cecy_ coulde not
forbeare to doe the same, and then stopt bothe her Ears. I expected
everie Moment to heare her say, "_Father_, 'twas I;" but no, she had
not Courage for that; onlie, when _Jack_ came forthe all smirched with
Tears, she put her Arm about his Neck, and they walked off together
into the Nuttery. Since that Hour, she hath beene more devoted to him
than ever, if possible; and he, Boy-like, finds Satisfaction in making
her his little Slave. But the Beauty lay in my _Father's_ Improvement
of the Circumstance. Taking _Cecy_ on his Knee that Evening, (for she
was not ostensiblie in Disgrace,) he beganne to talk of Atonement and
Mediation for Sin, and who it was that bare our Sins for us on the
Tree. 'Tis thus he turns the daylie Accidents of our quiet Lives into
Lessons of deepe Import, not pedanticallie delivered, _ex cathedrâ_,
but welling forthe from a full and fresh Mind.
[Illustration: Jack and Cecy.]
This Morn I had risen before Dawn, being minded to meditate on sundrie
Matters before _Bess_ was up and doing, she being given to much Talk
during her dressing, and made my Way to the Pavilion, where, methought,
I should be quiet enow; but beholde! _Father_ and _Erasmus_ were there
before me, in fluent and earneste Discourse. I would have withdrawne,
but _Father_, without interrupting his Sentence, puts his Arm rounde
me and draweth me to him; soe there I sit, my Head on 's Shoulder, and
mine Eyes on _Erasmus_ his Face.
From much they spake, and othermuch I guessed, they had beene
conversing on the present State of the Church, and how much it needed
Renovation.
_Erasmus_ sayd, the Vices of the Clergy and Ignorance of the Vulgar had
now come to a Poynt, at the which, a Remedie must be founde, or the
whole Fabric would falle to Pieces.
--Sayd, the Revival of Learning seemed appoynted by Heaven for some
greate Purpose, 'twas difficulte to say how greate.
--Spake of the new Art of Printing, and its possible Consequents.
--Of the active and fertile Minds at present turning up new Ground and
ferreting out old Abuses.
--Of the Abuse of Monachism, and of the evil Lives of Conventualls. In
special, of the Fanaticism and Hypocrisie of the Dominicans.
Considered the Evills of the Times such, as that Societie must
shortlie, by a vigorous Effort, shake 'em off.
Wondered at the Patience of the Laitie for soe many Generations, but
thoughte 'em now waking from theire Sleepe. The People had of late
begunne to know theire physickall Power, and to chafe at the Weighte of
theire Yoke.
Thoughte the Doctrine of Indulgences altogether bad and false.
_Father_ sayd, that the graduallie increast Severitie of Church
Discipline concerning minor Offences had become such as to render
Indulgences the needfulle Remedie for Burthens too heavie to be
borne.--Condemned a Draconic Code, that visitted even Sins of
Discipline with the extream Penaltie. Quoted how ill such excessive
Severitie answered in our owne Land, with regard to the Civill Law;
twenty Thieves oft hanging together on the same Gibbet, yet Robberie
noe Whit abated.
Othermuch to same Purport, the which, if alle set downe, woulde too
soon fill my Libellus. At length, unwillinglie brake off, when the Bell
rang us to Matins.
At Breakfaste, _William_ and _Rupert_ were earneste with my _Father_
to let 'em row him to _Westminster_, which he was disinclined to, as
he was for more Speede, and had promised _Erasmus_ an earlie Caste
to _Lambeth_; howbeit, he consented that they should pull us up to
_Putney_ in the Evening, and _William_ should have the Stroke-oar.
_Erasmus_ sayd, he must thank the _Archbishop_ for his Present of a
Horse; "tho' I'm full faine," he observed, "to believe it a Changeling.
He is idle and gluttonish, as thin as a Wasp, and as ugly as Sin. Such
a Horse, and such a Rider!"
In the Evening _Will_ and _Rupert_ had made 'emselves spruce enow, with
Nosegays and Ribbons, and we tooke Water bravelie;--_John Harris_ in
the Stern, playing the Recorder. We had the six-oared Barge; and when
_Rupert Allington_ was tired of pulling, Mr. _Clement_ tooke his Oar;
and when _he_ wearied, _John Harris_ gave over playing the Pipe; but
_William_ and Mr. _Gunnel_ never flagged.
_Erasmus_ was full of his Visitt to the _Archbishop_, who, as usuall, I
think, had given him some Money.
"We sate down two hundred to Table," sayth he; "there was Fish,
Flesh, and Fowl; but _Wareham_ onlie played with his Knife, and drank
noe Wine. He was very cheerfulle and accessible; he knows not what
Pride is; and yet, of how much mighte he be proude! What Genius!
What Erudition! what Kindnesse and Modesty! From _Wareham_, who ever
departed in Sorrow?"
Landing at _Fulham_, we had a brave Ramble thro' the Meadows.
_Erasmus_, noting the poor Children a gathering the Dandelion and
Milk-thistle for the Herb-market, was avised to speak of forayn Herbes
and theire Uses, bothe for Food and Medicine.
"For me," says _Father_, "there is manie a Plant I entertayn in my
Garden and Paddock which the Fastidious woulde caste forthe. I like to
teache my Children the Uses of common Things--to know, for Instance,
the Uses of the Flowers and Weeds that grow in our Fields and Hedges.
Manie a poor Knave's Pottage woulde be improved, if he were skilled
in the Properties of the Burdock and Purple Orchis, Lady's-smock,
Brook-lime, and Old Man's Pepper. The Roots of Wild Succory and Water
Arrow-head mighte agreeablie change his Lenten Diet; and Glasswort
afford him a Pickle for his Mouthfulle of Salt-meat. Then, there
are Cresses and Wood-sorrel to his Breakfast, and Salep for his hot
evening Mess. For his Medicine, there is Herb-twopence, that will
cure a hundred Ills; Camomile, to lull a raging Tooth; and the Juice
of Buttercup to cleare his Head by sneezing. Vervain cureth Ague; and
Crowfoot affords the leaste painfulle of Blisters. St. _Anthony's_
Turnip is an Emetic; Goose-grass sweetens the Blood; Woodruffe is good
for the Liver; and Bindweed hath nigh as much Virtue as the forayn
Scammony. Pimpernel promoteth Laughter; and Poppy, Sleep: Thyme giveth
pleasant Dreams; and an Ashen Branch drives evil Spirits from the
Pillow. As for Rosemarie, I lett it run alle over my Garden Walls,
not onlie because my Bees love it, but because 'tis the Herb sacred
to Remembrance, and, therefore, to Friendship, whence a Sprig of it
hath a dumb Language that maketh it the chosen Emblem at our Funeral
Wakes, and in our Buriall Grounds. Howbeit, I am a Schoolboy prating in
Presence of his Master, for here is _John Clement_ at my Elbow, who is
the best Botanist and Herbalist of us all."
--Returning Home, the Youths being warmed with rowing, and in high
Spiritts, did entertayn themselves and us with manie Jests and Playings
upon Words, some of 'em forced enow, yet provocative of Laughing.
Afterwards, Mr. _Gunnel_ proposed Enigmas and curious Questions. Among
others, he woulde know which of the famous Women of Greece or Rome
we Maidens would resemble. _Bess_ was for _Cornelia_, _Daisy_ for
_Clelia_, but I for _Damo_, Daughter of _Pythagoras_, which _William
Roper_ deemed stupid enow, and thoughte I mighte have found as good a
Daughter, that had not died a Maid. Sayth _Erasmus_, with his sweet,
inexpressible Smile, "Now I will tell you, Lads and Lasses, what manner
of Man _I_ would be, if I were not _Erasmus_. I woulde step back some
few Years of my Life, and be half-way 'twixt thirty and forty; I would
be pious and profounde enow for the Church, albeit noe Churchman; I
woulde have a blythe, stirring, English Wife, and half-a-dozen merrie
Girls and Boys, an English Homestead, neither Hall nor Farm, but
betweene both; neare enow to the Citie for Convenience, but away from
its Noise. I woulde have a Profession, that gave me some Hours daylie
of regular Businesse, that should let Men know my Parts, and court me
into Publick Station, for which my Taste made me rather withdrawe. I
woulde have such a private Independence, as should enable me to give
and lend, rather than beg and borrow. I woulde encourage Mirthe without
Buffoonerie, Ease without Negligence; my Habitt and Table shoulde be
simple, and for my Looks I woulde be neither tall nor short, fat nor
lean, rubicund nor sallow, but of a fayr Skin with blue Eyes, brownish
Beard, and a Countenance engaging and attractive, soe that alle of my
Companie coulde not choose but love me."
"Why, then, you woulde be _Father_ himselfe," cries _Cecy_, clasping
his Arm in bothe her Hands with a Kind of Rapture; and, indeede, the
Portraiture was soe like, we coulde not but smile at the Resemblance.
Arrived at the Landing, _Father_ protested he was wearie with his
Ramble; and, his Foot slipping, he wrenched his Ankle, and sate for
an Instante on a Barrow, the which one of the Men had left with his
Garden-tools, and before he could rise or cry out, _William_, laughing,
rolled him up to the House-door; which, considering _Father's_ Weight,
was much for a Stripling to doe. _Father_ sayd the same, and, laying
his Hand on _Will's_ Shoulder with Kindnesse, cried, "Bless thee,
my Boy, but I woulde not have thee overstrayned like _Biton_ and
_Cleobis_."
[Illustration: More in the Barrow.]
_June 20._
This Morn, hinting to _Bess_ that she was lacing herselfe too
straitlie, she brisklie replyed, "One would think 'twere as great
Meritt to have a thick Waiste as to be one of the earlie Christians!"
These humourous Retorts are ever at her Tongue's end; and albeit, as
_Jacky_ one Day angrilie remarked when she had beene teazing him,
"_Bess_, thy Witt is Stupidnesse;" yet, for one who talks soe much
at Random, no one can be more keene when she chooseth. _Father_ sayd
of her, half fondly, half apologeticallie, to _Erasmus_, "Her Wit
hath a fine Subtletie that eludes you almoste before you have Time
to recognize it for what it really is." To which _Erasmus_ readilie
assented, adding, that it had the rare Meritt of playing less on
Persons than Things, and never on bodilie Defects.
Hum!--I wonder if they ever sayd as much in Favour of me. I know,
indeede, _Erasmus_ calls me a forward Girl. Alas! that may be taken in
two Senses.
Grievous Work, overnighte, with the churning. Nought would persuade
_Gillian_ but that the Creame was bewitched by _Gammer Gurney_, who was
dissatisfyde last Friday with her Dole, and hobbled away mumping and
cursing. At alle Events, the Butter would not come; but _Mother_ was
resolute not to have soe much good Creame wasted; soe sent for _Bess_
and me, _Daisy_ and _Mercy Giggs_; and insisted on our churning in turn
till the Butter came, if we sate up alle Night for 't. 'Twas a hard
Saying; and mighte have hampered her like as _Jephtha_ his rash Vow:
howbeit, soe soone as she had left us, we turned it into a Frolick,
and sang _Chevy Chase_ from end to end, to beguile Time; ne'erthelesse,
the Butter would not come; soe then we grew sober, and, at the Instance
of sweete _Mercy_, chaunted the 119th Psalme; and, by the Time we had
attained to "_Lucerna Pedibus_," I hearde the Buttermilk separating
and splashing in righte earneste. 'Twas neare Midnighte, however; and
_Daisy_ had fallen asleep on the Dresser. _Gillian_ will ne'er be
convinced but that our Latin brake the Spell.
_21st._
_Erasmus_ went to _Richmond_ this Morning with _Polus_, (for soe he
Latinizes _Reginald Pole_, after his usual Fashion,) and some other
of his Friends. On his Return, he made us laugh at the following.
They had clomb the Hill, and were admiring the Prospect, when _Pole_,
casting his Eyes aloft, and beginning to make sundrie Gesticulations,
exclaimed, "What is it I beholde? May Heaven avert the Omen!" with
suchlike Exclamations, which raised the Curiositie of alle. "Don't you
beholde," cries he, "that enormous Dragon flying through the Sky? his
Horns of Fire? his curly Tail?"
"No," says _Erasmus_, "nothing like it. The Sky is as cleare as
unwritten Paper."
Howbeit, he continued to affirme and to stare, untill at lengthe,
one after another, by dint of strayning theire Eyes and theire
Imaginations, did admitt, first, that they saw Something; next, that
it mighte be a Dragon; and last, that it was. Of course, on theire
Passage homeward, they could talk of little else--some made serious
Reflections; others, philosophicall Speculations; and _Pole_ waggishly
triumphed in having beene the Firste to discerne the Spectacle.
"And you trulie believe there was a Signe in the Heavens?" we inquired
of _Erasmus_.
"What know I?" returned he smiling; "you know, _Constantine_ saw a
Cross. Why shoulde _Polus_ not see a Dragon? We must judge by the
Event. Perhaps its Mission may be to fly away with _him_. He swore to
the curly Tail."
How difficulte it is to discerne the supernatural from the incredible!
We laughe at _Gillian's_ Faith in our Latin; _Erasmus_ laughs at
_Polus_ his Dragon. Have we a righte to believe noughte but what we can
see or prove? Nay, that will never doe. _Father_ says a Capacitie for
reasoning increaseth a Capacitie for believing. He believes there is
such a Thing as Witchcraft, though not that poore olde _Gammer Gurney_
is a Witch; he believes that Saints can work Miracles, though not in
alle the Marvels reported of the _Canterbury_ Shrine.
Had I beene Justice of the Peace, like the King's Grandmother, I would
have beene very jealous of Accusations of Witchcraft; and have taken
infinite Payns to sift out the Causes of Malice, Jealousie, &c., which
mighte have wroughte with the poore olde Women's Enemies. _Holie Writ_
sayth, "Thou shalt not suffer a Witch to live;" but, questionlesse,
manie have suffered Hurte that were noe Witches; and for my Part, I
have alwaies helde ducking to be a very uncertayn as well as very cruel
Teste.
[Illustration: Margaret in the Tree.]
I cannot helpe smiling, whenever I think of my Rencounter with
_William_ this Morning. Mr. _Gunnell_ had set me _Homer's_ tiresome
List of Ships; and, because of the excessive Heate within Doors, I
took my Book into the Nuttery, to be beyonde the Wrath of far-darting
_Phoebus Apollo_, where I clomb into my favourite Filbert Seat. Anon
comes _William_ through the Trees without seeing me; and seats him at
the Foot of my Filbert; then, out with his Tablets, and, in a Posture I
should have called studdied, had he known anie one within Sighte, falls
a poetizing, I question not. Having noe Mind to be interrupted, I lett
him be, thinking he would soone exhaust the Vein; but a Caterpillar
dropping from the Leaves on to my Page, I was fayn, for Mirthe sake,
to shake it down on his Tablets. As ill Luck would have it, however,
the little Reptile onlie fell among his Curls; which soe took me at
Vantage that I coulde not helpe hastilie crying, "I beg your Pardon."
'Twas worth a World to see his Start! "Why!" cries he, looking up,
"are there indeede _Hamadryads_?" and would have gallanted a little,
but I bade him hold down his Head, while that with a Twig I switched
off the Caterpillar. Neither coulde forbeare laughing; and then he
sued me to step downe, but I was minded to abide where I was. Howbeit,
after a Minute's Pause, he sayd, in a grave, kind Tone, "Come, little
Wife;" and taking mine Arm steadilie in his Hand, I lost my Balance and
was faine to come down whether or noe. We walked for some Time _juxta
Fluvium_; and he talked not badlie of his Travels, insomuch as I founde
there was really more in him than one would think.
--Was there ever Aniething soe perverse, unluckie, and downrighte
disagreeable? We hurried our Afternoone Tasks, to goe on the Water with
my _Father_; and, meaning to give Mr. _Gunnel_ my _Latin_ Traduction,
which is in a Booke like unto this, I never knew he had my Journalle
insteade, untill that he burst out a laughing. "Soe this is the famous
_Libellus_," quoth he.... I never waited for another Word, but snatcht
it out of his Hand; which he, for soe strict a Man, bore well enow. I
do not believe he could have read a Dozen Lines, and they were towards
the Beginning; but I should hugelie like to know which Dozen Lines they
were.
Hum! I have a Mind never to write another Word. That will be punishing
myselfe, though, insteade of _Gunnel_. And he bade me not take it
to Heart like the late _Bishop of Durham_, to whom a like Accident
befel, which soe annoyed him that he died of Chagrin. I will never
again, howbeit, write Aniething savouring ever soe little of Levitie or
Absurditie. The Saints keepe me to it! And, to know it from my Exercise
Book, I will henceforthe bind a blue Ribbon round it. Furthermore, I
will knit the sayd Ribbon in soe close a Knot, that it shall be worth
no one else's Payns to pick it out. Lastlie, and for entire Securitie,
I will carry the Same in my Pouch, which will hold bigger Matters than
this.
_22nd._
This Daye, at Dinner, Mr. _Clement_ tooke the Pistoller's Place at
the Reading-desk; and, insteade of continuing the Subject in Hand,
read a Paraphrase of the 103rde Psalm; the Faithfulnesse and elegant
Turne of which, _Erasmus_ highlie commended, though he took Exceptions
to the Phrase "renewing thy Youth like that of the Phoenix," whose
fabulous Story he believed to have beene unknowne to the Psalmist,
and, therefore, however poeticall, unfitt to be introduced. A deepe
Blush on sweet _Mercy's_ Face ledd to the Detection of the Paraphrast,
and drew on her some deserved Commendations. _Erasmus_, turning to
my _Father_, exclaymed with Animation, "I woulde call this House the
Academy of _Plato_, were it not Injustice to compare it to a Place
where the usuall Disputations concerning Figures and Numbers were onlie
occasionallie intersperst with Disquisitions concerning the moral
Virtues." Then, in a graver Mood, he added, "One mighte envie you,
but that your precious Privileges are bound up with soe paynfulle
Anxieties. How manie Pledges have you given to Fortune!"
"If my Children are to die out of the Course of Nature, before
theire Parents," _Father_ firmly replyed, "I would rather they died
well-instructed than ignorant."
"You remind me," rejoyns _Erasmus_, "of _Phocion_; whose Wife, when
he was aboute to drink the fatal Cup, exclaimed, 'Ah, my Husband! you
die innocent.' 'And woulde you, my Wife,' he returned, 'have me die
guilty?'"
Awhile after, _Gonellus_ askt leave to see _Erasmus_ his Signet-ring,
which he handed down to him. In passing it back, _William_, who
was occupyde in carving a Crane, handed it so negligentlie that it
felle to the Ground. I never saw such a Face as _Erasmus_ made, when
'twas picked out from the Rushes! And yet, ours are renewed almost
daylie, which manie think over nice. He took it gingerlie in his
faire, Woman-like Hands, and washed and wiped it before he put it on;
which escaped not my Step-mother's displeased notice. Indeede, these
_Dutchmen_ are scrupulouslie cleane, though _Mother_ calls 'em swinish,
because they will eat raw Sallets; though, for that Matter, _Father_
loves Cresses and Ramps. She alsoe mislikes _Erasmus_ for eating Cheese
and Butter together with his Manchet; or what he calls _Boetram_; and
for being, generallie, daintie at his Sizes, which she sayth is an
ill Example to soe manie young People, and becometh not one with soe
little Money in 's Purse: howbeit, I think 'tis not Nicetie, but a weak
Stomach, which makes him loathe our Salt-meat Commons from Michaelmasse
to Easter, and eschew Fish of the coarser Sort. He cannot breakfaste
on colde Milk, like _Father_, but liketh Furmity a little spiced. At
Dinner, he pecks at, rather than eats, Ruffs and Reeves, Lapwings, or
anie smalle Birds it may chance; but affects Sweets and Subtilties,
and loves a Cup of Wine or Ale, stirred with Rosemary. _Father_ never
toucheth the Wine-cup but to grace a Guest, and loves Water from the
Spring. We growing Girls eat more than either; and _Father_ says he
loves to see us slice away at the Cob-loaf; it does him goode. What a
kind Father he is! I wish my _Step-mother_ were as kind. I hate all
sneaping and snubbing, flowting, fleering, pinching, nipping, and
such-like; it onlie creates Resentment insteade of Penitence, and
lowers the Minde of either Partie. _Gillian_ throws a Rolling-pin at
the Turnspit's Head, and we call it Low-life; but we looke for such
Unmannerlinesse in the Kitchen. A Whip is onlie fit for _Tisiphone_.
[Illustration: "I Noticed Argus Pearcht."]
As we rose from Table, I noted _Argus_ pearcht on the Window-sill,
eagerlie watching for his Dinner, which he looketh for as punctuallie
as if he could tell the Diall; and to please the good, patient Bird,
till the Scullion broughte him his Mess of Garden-stuff, I fetched
him some Pulse, which he took from mine Hand, taking good Heede not
to hurt me with his sharp Beak. While I was feeding him, _Erasmus_
came up, and asked me concerning _Mercy Giggs_; and I tolde him how
that she was a friendlesse Orphan, to whom deare _Father_ afforded
Protection and the run of the House; and tolde him of her Gratitude,
her Meekness, her Patience, her Docilitie, her Aptitude for alle goode
Works and Alms-deeds; and how, in her little Chamber, she improved
eache spare Moment in the Way of Studdy and Prayer. He repeated
"Friendlesse? she cannot be called Friendlesse, who hath _More_ for
her Protector, and his Children for Companions;" and then woulde heare
more of her Parents' sad Story. Alsoe, would hear somewhat of _Rupert
Allington_, and how _Father_ gained his Lawsuit. Alsoe, of _Daisy_,
whose Name he tooke to be the true Abbreviation for _Margaret_, but I
tolde him how that my Step-sister, and _Mercy_, and I, being all three
of a Name, and I being alwaies called _Meg_, we had in Sport given one
the Significative of her characteristic Virtue, and the other that of
the French _Marguerite_, which may indeed be rendered either Pearl or
Daisy. And _Chaucer_, speaking of our English Daisy, saith
"_Si douce est la Marguerite._"
_23rd._
Since the little Wisdom I have Capacitie to acquire, soe oft gives me
the Headache to Distraction, I marvel not at _Jupiter's_ Payn in his
Head, when the Goddess of Wisdom sprang therefrom full growne.
* * * * *
This Morn, to quiet the Payn brought on by too busie Application, Mr.
_Gunnel_ would have me close my Book and ramble forth with _Cecy_ into
the Fields. We strolled towards _Walham Greene_; and she was seeking
for Shepherd's Purses and Shepherd's Needles, when she came running
back to me, looking rather pale. I askt what had scared her, and she
made answer that _Gammer Gurney_ was coming along the Hedge. I bade
her set aside her Feares; and anon we came up with _Gammer_, who was
pulling at the purple Blossoms of the Deadly Nightshade. I sayd,
"_Gammer_, to what Purpose gather that Weed? knowest not 'tis Evill?"