_Rembang,_
_December 11th, 1903._[1]
My Dearest, Best Friends:
You do not know with what affection this, my first letter from my new
home, is written. A home where, praise God, there is peace and love
everywhere, and we are all happy with and through one another.
I regret so deeply that only through the press of circumstances I have
not been able to write to you before. Forgive me. The first days were so
frightfully hard; then our children were ailing, and at last I felt the
reaction from the wearisome days through which we had passed. I was far
from well and was obliged to take care of myself. Now I am again fresh
and happy. Once more it is the old irresponsible, hare-brained creature
of other days, who can look forward to the future with smiling eyes.
Do I have to express myself still more plainly, dearest? I bless the day
on which I laid my hand in that of him who was sent by the All-Father to
be my comrade in the journey through this great and difficult life.
Everything that was noble and beautiful in my eyes I find here realized
before me. Some of the dreams that I still dream he has carried out
years ago, or he dreams them now with me. We are so entirely one in
thought and ideas that often I am frightened. You would both love him if
you knew him. You would admire his clear brain and honour his good
heart. I have thought so often that the noble should live for the
people, and I have wanted to preach this aloud. Our nobles would not
care to hear it, but he, my heart's king, has gone before me.
It is just a month today since my husband brought me here to his
country, and led me into his house, now our home. The Queen could not
have been more warmly welcomed. All of Rembang made festival; even on
the border, every house was decorated with flags; the very hired
carriages on the highways bore the tricolour. The enthusiasm of the
people was so spontaneous and genuine, the expressions of sympathy came
so warmly from their hearts. The people were gay and rejoiced because
their beloved ruler was happy. Again and again my husband took me out on
the balcony--the people must see his new _Goesti-Poetri_.
I sat on a stool near him, silent, my eyes full of tears, and my heart
overflowing with emotion; there was happiness, there was gratitude,
there was pride; pride in him, that he had gained such a warm place in
the heart of the people; gratitude because one of my dearest dreams was
realized, and happiness because I sat there at his side.
And our children--how can I tell you of these delights? I felt drawn to
them at once, they are such dear, unspoiled creatures; and every day
they grow closer and closer to my heart. Their father has laid a good
foundation to their education; it began just as I always wished
education to begin in simplicity and modesty. My little treasures do not
hold themselves above the most humble person here in the house; every
one is alike to them. The field is prepared, I have only to go forth and
sow.
In January I hope to be able to open our little school. We are looking
for a good teacher; and till we have found one, I shall have charge of
the lessons myself. If unforeseen circumstances should intervene and I
be prevented in any way, one of my sisters will carry on the work for
me, till I am able to take charge of it again.
Several parents have already asked me to teach their children. Our idea
is to open a school for daughters of the native chiefs here, if we can
get a suitable teacher. If we could find a good governess, then she
could care for the mental development of our children and also for the
formation of their characters.
When everything is in good working order, could we not hope for a
subsidy from the Government? The expenses of the school would be as low
as possible; the children would receive their board and lodging free
from us. Shall I write a letter about it?
The parents are full of confidence and are asking us to take their
children. This is now our opportunity. We must begin. After a while I
shall write to you at greater length about our plans. I have the fullest
confidence that a girls' school, held by us at our home, under the
direction of a European teacher with me as head mistress, would succeed.
We have great plans, and we would give anything to be able to talk this
over with you and your husband face to face.
I am writing this at five o'clock in the morning. The children are awake
and hanging over my chair; mother must give them bread and milk.
You must see our youngest just once; he is not yet two years old, but so
intelligent. As I sat here, he came with a little footstool; it was too
heavy for him to carry, so he dragged it to mother; mother's feet must
not hang. Then the darling child climbed on my lap. When I call the
children to me, they fight to see which one shall reach me first, and
our little sister brings me the spoons and forks.
The one who is naughty must not come to mother. They have the greatest
fun when they bathe with me, and I too enjoy this more than anything
else. It is such a pleasure to see the fresh, laughing little faces.
And now I am going to talk about myself. I have not thanked you yet for
the many expressions of love which we have received from you of late. I
was made so happy by the letter from your husband and yourself, which I
received at Japara; my warmest thanks to you both. And you, Moedertje
dearest, I kiss you heartily on both cheeks for your welcome greeting,
which I found upon my arrival.
December, 16. Today I feel a great peace. A whole history lies behind
it. And this letter must not go until I have told it to you.
Guess who has been staying here and who went away only this morning.
Mevrouw and Heer Bervoets, from Modjowarno. They had been to Japara to
see my parents, who sent them here to us. It was an inspiration of
Father's, and we bless the happy chance which led those good angels
here.
I had been anxious for a long time to make the acquaintance of this
noble couple. My wish has been granted, and in what manner! I have
always thought of them with sympathy, but now deep gratitude is mingled
with the sympathy.
Day before yesterday, my husband was cheerful and wide awake the whole
day. At noon the Bervoets came, and he was so well that one would have
little thought that a few hours later he would be lying desperately ill.
Much interested, it was past midnight before we took leave of our
guests. An hour later, my husband was suffering from a violent
indisposition; the sickness came suddenly, and in less than three
minutes it was so severe that he hardly expected to see the morning. How
I felt, you can easily imagine. I had Doctor Bervoets called. He had
expected to leave the next morning at eight, but neither he nor his wife
had the heart to go away and leave us in so much trouble; they would go
at one o'clock instead. But even then they saw that my husband needed
constant medical attention, and our doctor was away on a journey.
It was an acute case of colic; an illness from which my husband had
never suffered before in his life. Yesterday at midday he began to mend,
and fell asleep. You can imagine how thankful I was. This morning at
eight o'clock, our new friends went away. My husband is improving
steadily and is only very weary. At this moment he is sleeping quietly,
and has been for a full half hour. God grant that he may soon be
entirely well!
It is so strange that in her last days his first wife should have
thought of me. She longed to know me, and to become friends with me. Her
dream was to go to Japara and to take her children to me; she hardly
laid my portrait out of her hand, and even on her last sick-bed she had
it by her.
After she had departed, and her earthly pain was over, every one here,
even the native officials, have had but one wish, which has now been
granted since the eighth of November. That is why there was such general
rejoicing when we came.
My husband received your letter with great pleasure. The horse trappings
for "East and West" are ready. They are now packed and as soon as he is
better, they will be sent. He has also several kinds of pea-cock feather
cigar holders, and we are looking for some examples of real Lassemsche
sarongs. We shall then see what we can do further for "East and West."
My husband thinks the idea of moving the Japara wood-carvers here
excellent. He supports me warmly in that, just as he does in all my
other projects. A handcraft school for natives has been one of his
dreams all along.
My husband is anxious for me to write a book about the sagas and legends
of Java. He would collect them for me, and we could work on them
together--a wonderful prospect.
There is so much that he wants to do with me; on my writing-table
several articles from his hand are already lying.
[1] To Mevrouw and Dr. Abendanon.