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TRANSCRIBERS' NOTES
This e-book contains the text of _The Fall of British Tyranny_,
extracted from Representative Plays by American Dramatists: Vol 1,
1765-1819. Comments and background to all the plays and the other plays
are available at Project Gutenberg.
Spelling as in the original has been preserved.
THE FALL
OF
BRITISH TYRANNY
_By_ JOHN LEACOCK
JOHN LEACOCK
Among the elusive figures of early American Drama stands John Leacock,
author of "The Fall of British Tyranny,"[1] published in 1776, in
Philadelphia. Even more elusive is the identification, inasmuch as his
name has been spelled variously Leacock, Lacock, and Laycock. To add to
the confusion, Watson's "Annals of Philadelphia," on the reminiscent
word of an old resident of that town, declares that Joseph Leacock
penned "The Medley."[2] "He wrote also a play, with good humour," says
this authority, "called 'British Tyranny.'" On careful search of the
files, no definite information in regard to Leacock has been
forthcoming. The dedication to "The Fall of British Tyranny" was signed
"Dick Rifle," but there is no information to be traced from this
pseudonym.
Searching the Colonial Records of Pennsylvania, I discovered no less
than three John Leacocks mentioned, all of whom were Coroners, as well
as a Joseph Leacock, who occupied the same position. Examining the
Records of the Pennsylvania Soldiers of the Revolution, I found several
John Leacocks in the ranks as privates, and also one John Laycock.
Professor Moses Coit Tyler, in his "Literary History of the American
Revolution" (ii, 198), giving a list of the characters in the play and
the names of those supposed to be lampooned, analyzes the piece
thoroughly, and says, "From internal evidence, it must be inferred that
the writing of the play was finished after the publication of 'Common
Sense' in January, 1776, and before the news had reached Philadelphia of
the evacuation of Boston, March 17, 1776." Though Sabin takes for
granted that Leacock wrote "The Fall of British Tyranny," Hildeburn, in
the "Issues of the Press" (ii, 249), states that it is "said to have
been written by Mr. Laycock of Philadelphia." If the John Leacock, whose
name appears in the Philadelphia Directory of 1802, is the one who wrote
"The Fall of British Tyranny," following that clue we find his name
disappearing from the Directory in 1804. Hence, he must either have
died, or have moved away from Philadelphia.
The elusive name of Leacock is to be considered also in connection with
an opera entitled, "The Disappointment; or, The Force of Credulity,"
signed by Andrew Barton,[3] supposed to be a pseudonym, and attributed
variously to "Colonel" Thomas Forrest and to John Leacock. I already
have had occasion to mention "The Disappointment" in connection with
Godfrey's "The Prince of Parthia." The reader will remember that in 1767
"The Disappointment" was put into rehearsal, but was suddenly withdrawn
in preference to Godfrey's piece. This play has been fully and
interestingly analyzed by O. G. Sonneck, who gives the reasons for the
withdrawal of the play from rehearsal by the American Company of
Philadelphia, 1767. These reasons are definitely stated in the
_Pennsylvania Gazette_ for April 16, 1767, which contains this warning
in the American Company's advertisement of "The Mourning Bride": "N.B.
'The Disappointment' (that was advertised for Monday), as it contains
personal Reflections, is unfit for the Stage."
The reason why this piece is attributed to "Colonel" Thomas Forrest is
that there is a memorandum in substantiation on the title-page of a copy
owned by the Library Company of Philadelphia.
Mr. Sonneck gives further and more extensive treatment of the subject in
his excellent book on "Early Opera in America," (Schirmer, 1915) as well
as in "Sammelbaende der Internationale Musik Gesellschaft," for
1914-1915.
We mention the matter here, because, although Sonneck enters into a long
discussion of the life of Forrest, he fails to give any satisfactory
account of John Leacock. In fact, he says in closing, "If Andrew Barton,
Esq., is to be a pseudonym, it seems to me that John Leacock, claimed
(by Mr. Hildeburn) to have written the tragi-comedy of 'The Fall of
British Tyranny,' should not be cast aside so cheerfully in favour of
Thomas Forrest."
Seilhamer and Durang, referring to the matter, mention Joseph Leacock as
a claimant for the authorship of "The Disappointment," and say that he
was a jeweler and a silversmith in Philadelphia; they also mention John
Leacock, the Coroner. Durang, in the "History of the Philadelphia
Stage," throws all weight in favour of Thomas Forrest. Sonneck says
further, regarding the matter,--"We may dispose of Joseph by saying that
he seems to have been among the dead when, in 1796, the second edition
of 'The Disappointment,' revised and corrected by the author, was
issued. On the other hand, Coroner John Leacock figures in the
Philadelphia Directories even later."
So the matter stands. The play, however, is a very definite
contribution, illustrating how quickly the American spirit changed in
the days preceding the Revolution. Imagine, in 1762, the students of the
College of New Jersey giving a piece entitled "The Military Glory of
Great Britain;"[4] and so short a time afterwards, only fourteen years,
in fact, a piece with the title, "The Fall of British Tyranny," being
greeted by the theatre-going public! Leacock's attempt may be taken as
the first example that we have of an American chronicle play. And it is
likewise significant as being the first literary piece in which George
Washington appears as a character. In the advertisement, the play is
thus described (see Ford):
"A pleasing scene between Roger and Dick, two shepherds near Lexington.
"Clarissa, etc. A very moving scene on the death of Dr. Warren, etc., in
a chamber near Boston, the morning after the battle of Bunker's Hill.
"A humorous scene between the Boatswain and a Sailor on board a
man-of-war, near Norfolk in Virginia.
"Two very laughable scenes between the Boatswain, two Sailors and the
Cook, exhibiting specimens of seafaring oratory, and peculiar eloquence
of those sons of Neptune, touching Tories, Convicts, and Black Regulars:
and between Lord Kidnapper and the Boatswain.
"A very black scene between Lord Kidnapper and Major Cudjo.
"A religious scene between Lord Kidnapper, Chaplain, and the Captain.
"A scene, the Lord Mayor, etc., going to St. James's with the address.
"A droll scene, a council of war in Boston, Admiral Tombstone, Elbow
Room, Mr. Caper, General Clinton and Earl Piercy.
"A diverting scene between a Whig and a Tory.
"A spirited scene between General Prescott and Colonel Allen.
"A shocking scene, a dungeon, between Colonel Allen and an officer of
the guard.
"Two affecting scenes in Boston after the flight of the regulars from
Lexington, between Lord Boston, messenger and officers of the guard.
"A patriotic scene in the camp at Cambridge, between the Generals
Washington, Lee, and Putnam, etc., etc."
It is interesting to note that in the Abbe Robin's discerning remarks,
concerning the effect of drama on the pupils of Harvard in 1781, and on
the general appeal of drama among the American Patriots, he mentions
"The Fall of British Tyranny" without giving the author's name.
FOOTNOTES:
[1] The Fall/of/British Tyranny;/or,/American Liberty/Triumphant./The
First Campaign./A Tragi-Comedy of Five Acts,/as Lately Planned/at the
Royal Theatrum Pandemonium,/at St. James's./The Principal Place of
Action in America./Publish'd According to Act of Parliament./Quis furor
o cives! quae tanta licentia ferri?/Lucan. lib. I. ver. 8./What blind,
detested madness could afford/Such horrid licence to the murd'ring
sword?/Rowe./Philadelphia:/Printed by Styner and Cist, in
Second-street,/near Arch-street. M DCC LXXVI.
[2] "The Medley; or, Harlequin Have At Ye All." A pantomime produced at
Covent Garden, and published in 1778.
[3] From Sabin, I take the following:
BARTON (A.) "The Disappointment; or, The Force of Credulity." A new
American Comic Opera, of two Acts. By Andrew Barton, Esq. [Motto.] _New
York, Printed in the year_ M, DCC, LXVIII. 8vo. pp. v., 58. P. t. Second
edition, revised and corrected, with large additions, by the Author.
_Philadelphia_, Francis Shallus, 1796. 12 mo. pp. iv., 94, p. 3801.
[Sabin also notes that the Philadelphia Library copy is very rare, with
MS Key to the characters, who were Philadelphians. Air No. iv is Yankee
Doodle (1767).]
[4] The Title-page runs as follows:
The/Military Glory/of/Great-Britain,/an/Entertainment,/given by the late
Candidates for/Bachelor's Degree,/At the close of the/Anniversary
Commencement, held/in/Nassau-Hall/New-Jersey/September 29th,
1762./Philadelphia:/Printed by William Bradford, M, DCC, LXII.
[Illustration: THE FALL
OF
BRITISH TYRANNY
OR,
AMERICAN LIBERTY
_TRIUMPHANT_.
THE FIRST CAMPAIGN.
A _TRAGI-COMEDY_ OF FIVE ACTS,
AS LATELY PLANNED
AT THE ROYAL THEATRUM PANDEMONIUM, AT ST. JAMES'S.
THE PRINCIPAL PLACE OF ACTION IN AMERICA.
PUBLISH'D. ACCORDING TO ACT OF PARLIAMENT.
Quis furor o cives! quae tanta licentia ferri?
LUCAN. lib. 1. ver. 8.
_What blind, detested madness could afford
Such horrid license to the murd'ring sword?_
ROWE.
_PHILADELPHIA:_
PRINTED BY STYNER AND CIST, IN SECOND-STREET, NEAR ARCH-STREET. M DCC
LXXVI.
FAC-SIMILE TITLE-PAGE OF THE FIRST EDITION]
_THE DEDICATION_
To Lord Boston, Lord Kidnapper, and the innumerable and never-ending
Clan of Macs and Donalds upon Donalds, and the Remnant of the
Gentlemen Officers, Actors, Merry Andrews, strolling Players,
Pirates, and Buccaneers in America.
My Lords and Gentlemen:
_Understanding you are vastly fond of plays and farces, and frequently
exhibit them for your own amusement, and the laudable purpose of
ridiculing your masters (the YANKEES, as you call 'em), it was expected
you would have been polite enough to have favoured the world, or America
at least (at whose expense you act them), with some of your play-bills,
or with a sample of your composition._
_I shall, however, not copy your churlishness, but dedicate the
following Tragi-Comedy to your patronage, and for your future
entertainment; and as the most of you have already acted your particular
parts of it, both comic and tragic, in reality at Lexington,
Bunker's-Hill, the Great-Bridge, &c., &c., &c., to the very great
applause of yourselves, tho' not of the whole house, no doubt you will
preserve the marks, or memory of it, as long as you live, as it is wrote
in capital American characters and letters of blood on your posteriors:
And however some Whigs may censure you for your affected mirth (as they
term it, in the deplorable situation you are now in, like hogs in a pen,
and in want of elbow room), yet I can by no means agree with them, but
think it a proof of true heroism and philosophy, to endeavour to make
the best of a bad bargain, and laugh at yourselves, to prevent others
from laughing at you; and tho' you are deprived of the use of your
teeth, it is no reason you should be bereaved of the use of your
tongues, your eyes, your ears, and your risible faculties and powers.
That would be cruel indeed! after the glorious and fatiguing campaign
you have made, and the many signal victories obtained over whole herds
of cattle and swine, routing flocks of sheep, lambs and geese, storming
hen-roosts, and taking them prisoners, and thereby raising the glory of
Old England to a pitch she never knew before. And ye Macs, and ye
Donalds upon Donalds, go on, and may our gallows-hills and liberty poles
be honour'd and adorn'd with some of your heads: Why should Tyburn and
Temple-bar make a monopoly of so valuable a commodity?_
_Wishing you abundance of entertainment in the re-acting this
Tragi-Comedy, and of which I should be proud to take a part with you,
tho' I have reason to think you would not of choice let me come within
three hundred yards of your stage, lest I should rob you of your
laurels, receive the clap of the whole house, and pass for a second
Garrick among you, as you know I always act with applause, speak
bold--point blank--off hand--and without prompter._
_I am_, My Lords and Gentlemen Buffoons,
_Your always ready humble servant,_
DICK RIFLE.
THE PREFACE
Solomon said, "Oppression makes a wise man mad:" but what would he have
said, had he lived in these days, and seen the oppression of the people
of Boston, and the distressed situation of the inhabitants of
Charlestown, Falmouth, Stonnington, Bristol, Norfolk, &c.? Would he not
have said, "The tongue of the sucking child cleaveth to the roof of his
mouth for thirst; the young children ask for bread, but no man breaketh
it unto them?" "They that did feed delicately, perish in the streets;
they that were brought up in scarlet, embrace the dung." What would he
have said of rejected petitions, disregarded supplications, and
contemned remonstrances? Would he not have said, "From hardness of
heart, good Lord, deliver us?" What would he have said of a freeborn
people butchered--their towns desolated, and become an heap of
ashes--their inhabitants become beggars, wanderers and vagabonds--by the
cruel orders of an unrelenting tyrant, wallowing in luxury, and wantonly
wasting the people's wealth, to oppress them the more? Would he not have
said, it was oppression and ingratitude in the highest degree, exceeding
the oppression of the children of Israel? and, like Moses, have cried
out, let the people go? Would he not have wondered at our patience and
long-suffering, and have said, "'Tis time to change our master!--'Tis
time to part!"--And had he been an American born, would he not have
shewed his wisdom by adopting the language of independency? Happy then
for America in these fluctuating times, she is not without her Solomons,
who see the necessity of heark'ning to reason, and listening to the
voice of COMMON SENSE.
THE GODDESS OF LIBERTY
Hail! Patriots,[5] hail! by me inspired be!
Speak boldly, think and act for Liberty,
United sons, America's choice band,
Ye Patriots firm, ye sav'ours of the land.
Hail! Patriots, hail! rise with the rising sun,
Nor quit your labour, till the work is done.
Ye early risers in your country's cause,
Shine forth at noon, for Liberty and Laws.
Build a strong tow'r, whose fabric may endure
Firm as a rock, from tyranny secure.
Yet would you build my fabric to endure,
Be your hearts warm--but let your hands be pure.
Never to shine, yourselves, your country sell;
But think you nobly, while in place act well.
Let no self-server general trust betray,
No picque, no party, bar the public way.
Front an arm'd world, with union on your side:
No foe shall shake you--if no friends divide.
At night repose, and sweetly take your rest;
None sleeps so sound as those by conscience blest;
May martyr'd patriots whisper in your ear,
To tread the paths of virtue without fear;
May pleasing visions charm your patriot eyes;
While Freedom's sons shall hail you blest and wise,
Hail! my last hope, she cries, inspired by me,
Wish, talk, write, fight, and die--for LIBERTY.
FOOTNOTES:
[5] The Congress
THE PROLOGUE
_Spoken by_ Mr. Peter Buckstail.
Since 'tis the fashion, preface, prologue next,
Else what's a play?--like sermon without text!
Since 'tis the fashion then, I'll not oppose;
For what's a man if he's without a nose?
The curtain's up--the music's now begun,
What is 't?--Why murder, fire, and sword, and gun.
What scene?--Why blood!--What act?--Fight and be free!
Or be ye slaves--and give up liberty!
Blest Continent, while groaning nations round
Bend to the servile yoke, ignobly bound,
May ye be free--nor ever be opprest
By murd'ring tyrants, but a land of rest!
What say ye to 't? what says the audience?
Methinks I hear some whisper COMMON SENSE.
Hark! what say them Tories?--Silence--let 'em speak,
Poor fools! dumb--they hav'n't spoke a word this week,
Dumb let 'em be, at full end of their tethers,
'Twill save the expense of tar and of feathers:
Since old Pluto's lurch'd 'em, and swears he does not know
If more these Tory puppy curs will bark or no.
Now ring the bell--Come forth, ye actors, come,
The Tragedy's begun, beat, beat the drum,
Let's all advance, equipt like volunteers,
Oppose the foe, and banish all our fears.
We will be free--or bravely we will die, }
And leave to Tories tyrants' legacy, }
And all our share of its dependency. }
DRAMATIS PERSONAE
LORD PARAMOUNT, Mr. Bute.
LORD MOCKLAW, Mr. Mansfield.
LORD HYPOCRITE, Mr. Dartmouth.
LORD POLTRON, Mr. Sandwich.
LORD CATSPAW, Mr. North.
LORD WISDOM, Mr. Chatham.
LORD RELIGION, Bishop of St. Asaph.
LORD JUSTICE, Mr. Camden.
LORD PATRIOT, Mr. Wilkes.
BOLD IRISHMAN, Mr. Burke.
JUDAS, Mr. Hutchinson.
CHARLEY, Mr. Jenkinson.
BRAZEN, Mr. Wedderburne.
COLONEL, Mr. Barre.
LORD BOSTON, Mr. Gage.
ADMIRAL TOMBSTONE, Mr. Graves.
ELBOW ROOM,[6] Mr. Howe.
MR. CAPER, Mr. Burgoyne.
LORD KIDNAPPER, Mr. Dunmore.
GENERAL WASHINGTON.
GENERAL LEE.
GENERAL PUTNAM.
_Officers, Soldiers, Sailors, Citizens, Negroes, &c., &c., &c._
FOOTNOTES:
[6] It seems to be generally thought that the expression of "Elbow Room"
is to be attributed to General Howe, and not to General Burgoyne.
THE FALL
OF
BRITISH TYRANNY, &c.
ACT I.
SCENE I. _At St. James's._
LORD PARAMOUNT [_solus, strutting about_].
Many long years have rolled delightfully on, whilst I have been basking
in the sunshine of grandeur and power, whilst I have imperceptibly (tho'
not unsuspected) guided the chariot of state, and greased with the
nation's gold the imperial wheels.
'Tis I that move the mighty engine of royalty, and with the tincture of
my somniferous opiate or (in the language of a courtier) by the virtue
of my secret influence, I have lulled the axletree to sleep, and brought
on a pleasing insensibility.
Let their champion, Lord Wisdom, groan, he is now become feeble and
impotent, a mere cripple in politics; their Lord Patriot's squint has
lost its basilisk effect: and the bold Irishman may bellow the _Keenew_
till he's hoarse, he's no more when compar'd to me than an Irish salmon
to a Scotch herring: I care not a bawbee for them all. I'll reign in
Britain, I'll be king of their counsels, and chief among the princes.
Oh! ambition, thou darling of my soul! stop not till I rise superior to
all superlative, till I mount triumphantly the pinnacle of glory, or at
least open the way for one of my own family and name to enter without
opposition.
The work is now cut out, and must be finish'd, I have ventur'd too far
to recede, my honour's at stake, my importance, nay my life, depends
upon it!
Last night's three hours' closeting has effectually done the business;
then I spoke my mind in such terms as to make a lasting impression,
never to be eradicated--all--all was given up to me, and now since I
hold the reins of government, since I am possessed of supreme power,
every thing shall be subservient to my royal will and pleasure.
SCENE II.
_Enter MOCKLAW._
MOCKLAW. I am your Lordship's most obedient humble servant.
PARAMOUNT. Be seated,--I sent for you to have a small conference with
you--and to let you know, your advice respecting certain points of law,
I have found succeeded to admiration; even beyond my most sanguine
expectations.
MOCKLAW. I am heartily glad of it, altho' the advice I gave your
Lordship, I cannot say, was law; yet, your Lordship can easily pass it
as such by a royal proclamation: and should it ever be disputed, I have
quirks and quibbles enough at your service, with Mr. Brazen and Mr.
Attorney-General's assistance, to render it so doubtful, obscure and
ambiguous, as to puzzle Lord Justice, perplex Dunning, and confound
Glynn.
PARAMOUNT. Can you show me an instance of a royal proclamation passing
for a law? or advise me how to make it such, if you can, I shall make it
well worth your study.
MOCKLAW. My Lord, as you have now got a parliament exactly to your mind,
ev'ry thing you propose will be granted; but in order that you may see
precedents are not wanting--there is a statute in the reign of Henry the
8th that expressly shews the then parliament passed a law that the
king's proclamation should be the law of the land--
PARAMOUNT. Are you sure of that?
MOCKLAW. My Lord, here it is--this is real law: _Luce meridiana
clariora_. When we find any thing of this kind, ready made to our hands,
it's a treasure we should never part with.
[_PARAMOUNT reads._
PARAMOUNT. I see it plain! this, this alone is worth a ton of
gold.--Now, by St. Andrew! I'll strike a stroke that shall surprise all
Europe, and make the boldest of the adverse party turn pale and
tremble--Scotch politics, Scotch intrigues, Scotch influence, and Scotch
impudence (as they have termed it), they shall see ere long shine with
unheard of splendour, and the name of Lord Paramount the mighty, shall
blaze in the annals of the world with far greater lustre (as a
consummate politician) than the name of Alexander the Great, as an hero!
MOCKLAW. That day I much wish for,--but, with your Lordship's
permission, I would just mention, that secrecy and dissimulation are the
soul of enterprise; your Lordship hath many enemies, who watch ev'ry
movement of state with a jealous and wary eye.
PARAMOUNT. I know it, but the futile attempts of my timid adversaries
have hitherto proved abortive--so far I have borne down all opposition,
and those (even some of the greatest of them) who not long since were my
most open, as well as secret enemies, I now behold with the most
princely pleasure, the earliest to attend, to congratulate me on my
birthday, tho' uninvited, bow down, and make the most submissive
congees. Have you not seen this, Mocklaw? and how I keep them in
expectation of something, by now and then bestowing part of a gracious
smile amongst a dozen of them?
MOCKLAW. I have, my Lord, and no doubt they interpret that as a
favourable omen;--however, policy, my Lord, would dictate that to you,
if there were no other consideration.
PARAMOUNT. True, and yet they are cursedly mistaken--and now, Mocklaw,
as I have ever found you to be well dispos'd towards me, and the cause I
espouse, and as I trust you continue satisfy'd with my former bounty,
and my promise now of granting you a pension for life, with liberty to
retire, I shall make you my confident, and disclose to you a secret no
man except myself yet knows, which I expect you have so much honour to
let it remain a secret to all the world (I mean as to the main point I
have in view).
MOCKLAW. Depend upon it, my Lord, I am sincerely devoted to your
Lordship, command me, I care not what it is, I'll screw, twist and
strain the law as tight as a drumhead, to serve you.
PARAMOUNT. I shall at this time but just give you a hint of the plan
I've drawn up in my own mind. You must have perceived in me a secret
hankering for majesty for some time past, notwithstanding my age;--but
as I have considered the great dislike the nation in general have, as to
my person, I'll wave my own pretensions, and bend my power and assiduity
to it in favour of one, the nearest a kin to me, you know who I mean,
and a particular friend of yours, provided I continue to be dictator,
as at present; and further, I intend America shall submit. What think
you of it so far?
MOCKLAW. A day I've long wish'd to see! but you stagger me, my Lord, not
as to my honour, secrecy, or resolution to serve you, but as to the
accomplishment of such grand designs.
PARAMOUNT. 'Tis true, I have undertaken a mighty task, a task that would
have perplexed the Council of Nice, and stagger'd even Julius
Caesar--but--
MOCKLAW. You have need, my Lord, of all your wisdom, fortitude and
power, when you consider with whom you have to contend--Let me see--Lord
Wisdom--Lord Religion--Lord Justice--Lord Patriot--the bold Irishman,
&c., &c., &c., and the wisdom of the United Colonies of America in
Congress to cope with; as individuals they are trifling, but in league
combined may become potent enemies.
PARAMOUNT. Granted--But are you so little of a lawyer as not to know the
virtue of a certain specific I'm possess'd of, that will accomplish any
thing, even to performing miracles? Don't you know there's such sweet
music in the shaking of the treasury keys, that they will instantly lock
the most babbling patriot's tongue? transform a Tory into a Whig, and a
Whig into a Tory? make a superannuated old miser dance, and an old Cynic
philosopher smile. How many thousand times has your tongue danc'd at
Westminster Hall to the sound of such music?
MOCKLAW. Enchanting sounds, powerful magic, there's no withstanding the
charms of such music, their potency and influence are irresistible--that
is a point of law I can by no means give up, of more force than all the
acts of parliament since the days of King Alfred.
PARAMOUNT. I'm glad you acknowledge that--Now then for a line of
politics--I propose to begin first by taxing America, as a blind--that
will create an eternal animosity between us, and by sending over
continually ships and troops, this will, of course, produce a civil
war--weaken Britain by leaving her coasts defenseless, and impoverish
America; so that we need not fear any thing from that quarter. Then the
united fleets of France and Spain with troops to appear in the channel,
and make a descent, while my kinsman with thirty thousand men lands in
Scotland, marches to London, and joins the others: What then can prevent
the scheme from having the wish'd for effect? This is the main point,
which keep to yourself.
MOCKLAW. If it has failed heretofore, 'tis impossible it should fail
now; nothing within the reach of human wisdom was ever planned so
judiciously; had Solomon been alive, and a politician, I would have
sworn your Lordship had consulted him.--But I would beg leave to hint to
your Lordship the opposition to be apprehended from the militia of
England, and the German forces that may be sent for according to treaty.
PARAMOUNT. As to the militia, they are half of them my friends, witness
Lancaster, Manchester, Liverpool, &c., &c., &c., the other half scarce
ever fired a gun in their lives, especially those of London; and I shall
take care by shaking the keys a little to have such officers appointed
over them, who are well known to be in my interest. As to the German
forces, I have nothing to apprehend from them; the parliament can soon
pass an act against the introduction of foreign troops, except the
French or Spaniards, who can't be called foreign, they are our friends
and nearest neighbours. Have you any thing further to object against the
probability of this plan?
MOCKLAW. Nothing, my Lord, but the people of Ireland, who must be
cajoled or humbugg'd.
PARAMOUNT. As to that, let me alone, I shall grant the Roman Catholics,
who are by far the most numerous, the free exercise of their religion,
with the liberty of bearing arms, so long unjustly deprived of, and
disarm in due time all the Protestants in their turn.
MOCKLAW. That will be a noble stroke, the more I consider it, the more
I'm surpris'd at your Lordship's profound wisdom and foresight: I think
success is certain.
PARAMOUNT. Then this is the favourable crisis to attempt it; 'tis not
the thought of a day, a month, or a year. Have you any more objections?
MOCKLAW. I have one more, my Lord--
PARAMOUNT. Well, pray let's hear it; these lawyers will be heard.
MOCKLAW. The Bishops and Clergy are a powerful, numerous body; it would
be necessary, my Lord, to gain them over, or keep them silent--A
religious war is the worst of wars.
PARAMOUNT. You are very right, I have 'em fast enough--Mammon will work
powerfully on them--The keys--the keys--His Grace my Lord of Suffolk is
managing this business for me, and feeding them with the hopes of being
all created Archbishops here, and each to have a diocese, and Bishops
of their own appointment in America; not a city or town there but must
be provided with a Bishop: There let religion erect her holy altars, by
which means their revenues will be augmented beyond that of a Cardinal.
All this we must make 'em believe.
MOCKLAW. True, my Lord, what is a Bishop without faith? This is the
grandest stroke of religious circumvention that ever was struck.--I've
done, my Lord.
PARAMOUNT. Very well, you'll not fail to meet the privy council here
this evening; in the mean time you'll go and search the statutes for
other precedents to strengthen the cause; and remember I have enjoin'd
you to secrecy.
MOCKLAW. Depend upon it, my Lord, I cannot prove ungrateful to your
Lordship, nor such an enemy to myself.
[_Exit MOCKLAW._
SCENE III. LORD PARAMOUNT [_solus_].
This Mocklaw is a cursed knowing dog, and I believe the father of
Brazen; how readily he found an old act of parliament to my purpose, as
soon as I told him I would make it worth his study; and the thoughts of
a pension will make him search his old worm-eaten statute books from the
reign of King Arthur down to this present time; how he raises objections
too to make me think his mind is ever bent on study to serve me. The
shaking of the treasury keys is a fine bait. [_Rings the bell._]
Charters, magna chartas, bill of rights, acts of assembly, resolves of
congresses, trials by juries (and acts of parliament too) when they make
against us, must all be annihilated; a suspending power I approve of,
and of royal proclamations.
[_Enter CHARLEY._
CHARLEY. I wait your Lordship's orders.
PARAMOUNT. Write a number of cards, and see that the Lords of the privy
council, and Mr. Judas, be summoned to give their attendance this
evening at six o'clock, at my Pandemonium.
CHARLEY. I'm gone, my Lord.
[_Exit CHARLEY._
PARAMOUNT [_solus_].
How do we shew our authority? how do we maintain the royal prerogative?
keep in awe the knowing ones of the opposite party, and blind the eyes
of the ignorant multitude in Britain? Why, by spirited measures, by an
accumulation of power, of deception, and the shaking of the keys, we
may hope to succeed, should that fail, I'll enforce them with the
pointed bayonet; the Americans from one end to the other shall submit,
in spite of all opposition; I'll listen to no overtures of
reconciliation from any petty self-constituted congress, they shall
submit implicitly to such terms as I of my royal indulgence please to
grant. I'll shew them the impudence and weakness of their resolves, and
the strength of mine; I will never soften; my inflexibility shall stand
firm, and convince them the second Pharaoh is at least equal to the
first. I am unalterably determined at every hazard and at the risk of
every consequence to compel the colonies to absolute submission. I'll
draw in treasure from every quarter, and, Solomon-like, wallow in
riches; and Scotland, my dear Scotland, shall be the paradise of the
world. Rejoice in the name of Paramount, and the sound of a bawbee shall
be no more heard in the land of my nativity.--
SCENE IV.
_Enter CHARLEY in haste._
CHARLEY. My Lord, the notices are all served.
PARAMOUNT. It's very well, Charley.
CHARLEY. My Lord, be pleased to turn your eyes, and look out of the
window, and see the Lord Mayor, Aldermen, Common Council and Liverymen
going to St. James's with the address.
PARAMOUNT. Where? Sure enough--Curse their impudence; how that squinting
scoundrel swells with importance--Mind, Charley, how fond he is of
bowing to the gaping multitude, and ev'ry upstart he sees at a window--I
hope he'll not turn his blear eyes t'wards me--I want none of his bows,
not I--Stand before me, Charley--
CHARLEY. I will, my Lord, and if he looks this way, I'll give him such a
devilish grin as best suits such fellows as him, and make him remember
it as long as he lives.
PARAMOUNT. Do so, Charley; I hate the dog mortally, I religiously hate
him, and hope ere long to have satisfaction for his insolence and the
freedoms he has taken with me and my connections: I shall never forget
the many scandalous verses, lampoons and pasquinades he made upon us.
CHARLEY. Indeed, he has used your Lordship too ill ever to be forgotten
or forgiven.
PARAMOUNT. Damn him, I never intend to do either--See again how he
bows--there again--how the mob throw up their hats, split their throats;
how they huzza too; they make a mere god of the fellow; how they idolize
him--Ignorant brutes!
CHARLEY. A scoundrel; he has climb'd up the stilts of preferment
strangely, my Lord.
PARAMOUNT. Strangely, indeed; but it's our own faults.
CHARLEY. He has had better luck than honester folks; I'm surpris'd to
think he has ever rose to the honour of presenting a remonstrance, or
rather, that he could ever have the impudence to think of remonstrating.
PARAMOUNT. Aye, Charley, you see how unaccountably things turn out; his
audacity is unparalleled--a Newgate dog.
CHARLEY. My Lord, I believe the fellow was never known to blush; and,
indeed, it's an observation I made some time ago, and I believe a just
one, without an exception, that those who squint never blush.
PARAMOUNT. You must be mistaken, Charley.
CHARLEY. No, my Lord, it's a fact, I had an uncle squinted exactly like
him, who was guilty of many scandalous things, and yet all the parish,
with the parson at their head, could not make him blush, so that at last
he became a by-word--Here comes old shame-the-devil; this dog is the
very spawn of him.
PARAMOUNT. Hoot, mon, ye give your uncle a shocking character.
CHARLEY. I only mention it, my Lord, for the similarity's sake.
PARAMOUNT. For the spawn of him, and the similarity's sake, I'm apt to
think you've been abusing your own cousin all this while.
CHARLEY. God forbid, my Lord, I should be any how allied to him.
PARAMOUNT. I fancy, Charley, if the truth was known, your uncle did not
mention you in his will, and forgot to leave you the mansion-house and
farm at Gallows-hill. Am I right, Charley?
CHARLEY. You're right, my Lord, upon my honour--but--
PARAMOUNT. I thought so--Well, never mind--Ha, ha, ha, who are those two
fat fellows there, that go in such state?
CHARLEY. I suppose them to be a couple of Livery Tallow-chandlers, my
Lord, by their big bellies.
PARAMOUNT. Ha, ha,--what work the guards would make amongst them--but
they must not be called yet.--And who are those other two behind 'em?
CHARLEY. This is Mr. Hone, and the other Mr. Strap, a couple of the
Corporation Barbers, forsooth.
PARAMOUNT. Ha, ha, ha, I thought they had been a couple of Dukes;--and
that one--who is he with the monstrous wig?
CHARLEY. That is Mr. Alderman Pipeshank, in Newgate-street.
PARAMOUNT. A parcel of Newgate dogs altogether--Well it is a good deal
of satisfaction to me to think how this fellow will be received at St.
James's; he'll not return back so pleas'd as he seems to be now, I
warrant you--I have taken care he shall meet with a d----d cold
reception there; he will have to make his appearance before Lord
Frostyface, Lord Scarecrow, Lord Sneerwell, Lord Firebrand, Lord
Mawmouth, Lord Waggonjaws, Lord Gripe, Lord Brass, Lord Surly and Lord
Tribulation, as hard-fac'd fellows as himself; and the beauty of it is,
not one of them loves him a whit more than I do.
CHARLEY. That will be rare diversion for them that are present; he'll
look then, my Lord, like Sampson making sport for the Philistines.
PARAMOUNT. Aye, but I wish he was as blind too, as Sampson was.--Well
Charley, we have been dispos'd to be a little merry with this ridiculous
parade, this high life below stairs. I wish you had begun your
description a little sooner, before they were all gone; the looks of
these wiseacres afford us some mirth, tho' we despise them and their
politics, and it's not unlikely it may end in blood--Be it so, I'm
prepar'd for the worst.
CHARLEY. Rather so, my Lord, than submit to such rascals.
PARAMOUNT. I'll give up my life first for a sacrifice.
[_Exit CHARLEY._
SCENE V.
_Enter MOCKLAW, POLTRON, HYPOCRITE, CATSPAW, BRAZEN, JUDAS._ [_All
seated._]
PARAMOUNT. My Lords and Gentlemen, it seems opposition to our measures
are making hasty strides; the discontented faction, the supporters and
encouragers of rebellion, and whole hearts are tainted therewith, seem
bent, if possible, on the destruction of Britain, and their own
aggrandisement. Are not the daily papers filled with treasonable
resolves of American congresses and committees, extracts of letters,
and other infamous pieces and scurrilous pamphlets, circulating with
unusual industry throughout the kingdom, by the enemies of Britain,
thereby poisoning the minds of our liege subjects with their detestable
tenets?--And did you not this day see the procession, and that vile
miscreant Lord Patriot at their head, going to St. James's with their
remonstrance, in such state and parade as manifestly tended to provoke,
challenge and defy majesty itself, and the powers of government? and yet
nothing done to stop their pernicious effects.--Surely, my Lords and
Gentlemen, you must agree with me, that it is now become highly
expedient that an immediate stop should be put to such unwarrantable and
dangerous proceedings, by the most vigorous and coercive measures.
MOCKLAW. I entirely agree with your Lordship, and was ever firmly of
opinion, that licentiousness of every kind (particularly that of the
Press) is dangerous to the state; the rabble should be kept in awe by
examples of severity, and a proper respect should be enforced to
superiors. I have sufficiently shewn my dislike to the freedom of the
Press, by the examples I have frequently made (tho' too favourable) of
several Printers, and others, who had greatly trespassed, and if they
still persist, other measures should be taken with them, which the laws
will point out; and as to Lord Patriot, he's a fellow that has been
outlaw'd, scandal-proof, little to be got by meddling with him; I would
advise to let him alone for the present, and humble America first.
MR. BRAZEN. I am very clear in it, please your Lordship; there are
numbers of men in this country who are ever studying how to perplex and
entangle the state, constantly thwarting government, in ev'ry laudable
undertaking; this clamorous faction must be curbed, must be subdued and
crush'd--our thunder must go forth, America must be conquered. I am for
blood and fire to crush the rising glories of America--They boast of her
strength; she must be conquered, if half of Germany is called to our
assistance.
MR. POLTRON. I entirely agree with you, Mr. Brazen; my advice is, that
Lord Boston and Admiral Tombstone be immediately despatch'd to Boston,
with two or three regiments (tho' one would be more than sufficient) and
a few ships to shut up their ports, disannul their charter, stop their
trade, and the pusillanimous beggars, those scoundrel rascals, whose
predominant passion is fear, would immediately give up, on the first
landing of the regulars, and fly before 'em like a hare before the
hounds; that this would be the case, I pawn my honour to your Lordships,
nay, I'll sacrifice my life: My Lords, I have moreover the testimony of
General Amherst and Colonel Grant to back my assertion; besides, here's
Mr. Judas, let him speak.
LORD HYPOCRITE. If this is the same Colonel Grant that was at Fort
Duquesne, the same that ran away from the French and Indians, the same
that was rescued by Colonel Washington, I have no idea of his honour or
testimony.
LORD POLTRON. He's a Gentleman, my Lord Hypocrite, of undoubted
veracity.
LORD HYPOCRITE. You might as well have said courage too, I have
exceptions against both; and as to General Amherst's assertion that he
could drive all America with five thousand men, he must have been
joking, as he is quite of a diff'rent opinion now.
LORD CATSPAW. What is your opinion of your countrymen, Mr. Judas, with
respect to their courage?
JUDAS. The same that I have ever told you, my Lord; as to true courage
they have none, I know 'em well--they have a plenty of a kind of
enthusiastic zeal, which they substitute in the room of it; I am very
certain they would never face the regulars, tho' with the advantage of
ten to one.
LORD HYPOCRITE. All this, and a great deal more, would never convince me
of the general cowardice of the Americans--but of the cowardice of Grant
I've been long convinced, by numbers of letters formerly from
America--I'm for doing the business effectually; don't let us be too
sanguine, trust to stories told by every sycophant, and hurry heels over
head to be laugh'd at; the Americans are bold, stubborn, and sour; it
will require foreign assistance to subdue 'em.
LORD CATSPAW. These four Americans, ignorant brutes, unbroke and wild,
must be tamed; they'll soon be humble if punish'd; but if disregarded,
grow fierce.--Barbarous nations must be held by fear, rein'd and spurr'd
hard, chain'd to the oar, and bow'd to due control, till they look grim
with blood; let's first humble America, and bring them under our feet;
the olive-branch has been held out, and they have rejected it; it now
becomes us to use the iron rod to break their disobedience; and should
we lack it, foreign assistance is at hand.
LORD HYPOCRITE. All this I grant, but I'm for sending a force sufficient
to crush 'em at once, and not with too much precipitation; I am first
for giving it a colour of impartiality, forbearance and religion.--Lay
it before parliament; we have then law on our side, and endeavour to
gain over some or all of the Methodist Teachers, and in particular my
very good friend Mr. Wesley, their Bishop, and the worthy Mr. Clapum,
which task I would undertake; it will then have the sanction of
religion, make it less suspected, and give it a better grace.
LORD CATSPAW. I should choose it to be done by consent of parliament; we
stand then on firmer ground; there's no doubt they'll grant ev'ry thing
your Lordship proposes upon my motion: but to tell the truth, I'd rather
be in Purgatory so long, than to run the gauntlet of the Bold Irishman's
tongue.
MOCKLAW. Aye, aye, don't part with the law while it's in our favour, or
we can have it by asking for--and as to the Bold Irishman, don't be
brow-beaten, you must summon all your brass, and put on a rugged
highwayman's face like his; I expect some work of that kind too, but the
devil himself sha'n't browbeat me.
PARAMOUNT. I am glad to find, my Lords and Gentlemen, you all see the
necessity of sending over troops and ships; I intend my Lord Catspaw
shall lay it before parliament, and am very certain they'll pass any
acts I can desire. I thank you, Lord Hypocrite, for your kind offer, and
accept of it; my Lord of Suffolk is negotiating the same business with
the rest of my Lords the Bishops, and will succeed; so that it will
carry the appearance of law, of religion, and will be sufficiently
grac'd; I'll warrant you no one shall have cause to complain of its
wanting grace. And now, my Lords and Gentlemen, as it's so late, and we
have gone through all the business at this time proposed, you are at
your liberty to withdraw.
[_Exeunt._
PARAMOUNT [_solus_].
The fate of England and America is now fixed, irrevocably fixed; the
storm is ready to burst; the low'ring clouds portend their fate my
glory, their fall my triumph--But I must haste to be gone, the
ceremonies await my presence; deeds of darkness must be done by night,
and, like the silent mole's work, under ground:
_Now rushing forth in sober twilight gray,
Like prowling wolf, who ranges for his prey._
[_Exit._
ACT II.
SCENE I.
LORD WISDOM, LORD RELIGION, LORD JUSTICE.
LORD WISDOM.
I much lament, my Lords, the present unhappy situation of my country;
where e'er I turn mine eyes, to Europe, Asia, Africa, or America, the
prospect appears the same--Look up to the throne, and behold your king,
if I may now call him by that soft title--Where is the wisdom, the
justice, the religion, that once adorn'd that throne, and shed the
benign influence of their bright rays thro' the four quarters of the
globe? Alas! they're flown!
Mark his forlorn looks--his countenance dejected, a sullen greatness
fixed on his brow, as if it veil'd in blood some awful purpose, his eyes
flaming and sanguinary; how I bewail you, for your predecessor's sake!
Long, long have I been an old, and I trust a faithful, servant in the
family--Can I then restrain one tear? No, 'tis impossible! View that
arch-dragon, that old fiend, Paramount, that rebel in grain, whispering
in his ear. View his wretched ministers hovering round him, to
accomplish their accursed purpose, and accelerate his destruction. View
the whole herd of administration (I know 'em well) and tell me if the
world can furnish a viler set of miscreants? View both houses of
parliament, and count the number of Tyrants, Jacobites, Tories,
Placemen, Pensioners, Sycophants, and Panders. View the constitution, is
she not disrob'd and dismantled? is she not become like a virgin
deflower'd? View our fleets and armies commanded by bloody, murdering
butchers! View Britain herself as a sheep without a shepherd! And lastly
view America, for her virtue bleeding and for her liberty weltering in
her blood!
LORD RELIGION. Such hath, and ever will be the fate of kings, who only
listen to the voice of pleasure, thrown in their way by the sirens of
administration, which never fail to swallow them up like quicksand--like
a serpent, who charms and fascinates, bewitches and enchants with his
eye the unwary bird; witness the fatal catastrophe of Rehoboam, who
rejected the counsel of the wise and experienced, and gave up all to the
advice and guidance of young, unskilful and wicked counsellors. Had he
listen'd to you, my Lord, had he followed your advice, all, all would
have gone well--Under your auspicious administration Britain
flourished, but ever since has been on the decline and patriotism, like
religion, scarcely now more than a sounding brass or a tinkling cymbal.
LORD WISDOM. My counsel has been rejected--my conciliatory plan thrown
under the table, and treated with contempt; the experience of gray hairs
called the superannuated notions of old age--my bodily infirmities--my
tottering frame--my crazy carcase, worn out in the service of my
country, and even my very crutches, have been made the subject of their
ridicule.
LORD JUSTICE. Gratitude, like religion and patriotism, are about taking
their flight, and the law of the land stands on tip-toe; the
constitution, that admirable fabric, that work of ages, the envy of the
world, is deflower'd indeed, and made to commit a rape upon her own body,
by the avaricious frowns of her own father, who is bound to protect her,
not to destroy.--Her pillars are thrown down, her capitals broke, her
pedestals demolish'd, and her foundation nearly destroy'd.--Lord
Paramount and his wretched adviser Mocklaw baffle all our efforts.--The
statutes of the land superseded by royal proclamations and dispensing
powers, &c., &c., the bloody knife to be held to the throats of the
Americans, and force them to submit to slav'ry.--Administration have
commenced bloody tyrants, and those that should protect the subject are
become their executioners; yet will I dispute with them inch by inch,
while there's a statute book left in the land. Come forth, thou grand
deceiver! I challenge thee to come forth!
LORD WISDOM. Our friends must bestir themselves once more, perhaps we
may yet turn the scale.--If the voice of religion, wisdom and justice
should fail, let us sound the trumpet of liberty and patriotism, that
will conquer them in America, I know; let us try to storm them here with
the united whole, and if by a base majority they still carry their
point, we can nevertheless wash our hands and be clean.
LORD RELIGION. From the pulpit, in the house of God, have I spoken
aloud, I have lifted up my voice like a trumpet. O Britain, how art thou
fallen! Hear now, O house of Britain, is it a small thing for you to
weary man, but will you weary your God also? In the house of Lords have
I borne my testimony: Hear now, O ye Princes, and I will yet declare in
Britain, and shew forth in America, I will not cease till I bring about
(if possible) unity, peace and concord.
LORD WISDOM. Much to be wished for; but alas! I fear it's now too late;
I foresee the tendency and consequence of those diabolical measures that
have been pursued with unrelenting fury. Britain will ruin her trade,
waste her wealth, her strength, her credit and her importance in the
scale of Europe. When a British king proves ungrateful and haughty, and
strives to be independent of his people (who are his sole support), the
people will in their turn likewise strive to be independent of him and
his myrmidons, and will be free; they will erect the anfractuous
standard of independency, and thousands and tens of thousands will flock
to it, and solace themselves under its shade.--They has often been told
of this, but affected to despise it; they know not America's strength,
they are ignorant of it; fed by the flatt'ry of every sycophant tale,
imagine themselves almighty, and able to subdue the whole world. America
will be lost to Britain forever, and will prove her downfall. America is
wise, and will shake off the galling yoke before it be rivetted on them;
they will be drove to it, and who can blame them? Who can blame a
galley-slave for making his escape?--Britain will miscarry in her vile
projects, her knight errant, her Don Quixote schemes in America: America
will resist; they are not easily to be subdued (nay, 'tis impossible);
Britain will find it a harder task than to conquer France and Spain
united, and will cost 'em more blood and treasure than a twice Seven
Years' War with those European powers; they will stand out till Britons
are tired. Britain will invite her with kind promises and open arms;
America will reject them; America will triumph, rejoice and flourish,
and become the glory of the earth; Britain will languidly hold down her
head, and become first a prey to a vile Pretender, and then be subject
to the ravagers of Europe. I love the Americans, because they love
liberty. Liberty flourishes in the wilds of America. I honour the plant,
I revere the tree, and would cherish its branches. Let us, my friends,
join hands with them, follow their example, and endeavour to support
expiring liberty in Britain; whilst I have a tongue to speak, I will
support her wherever found; while I have crutches to crawl with, I will
try to find her out, and with the voice of an archangel will demand for
a sacrifice to the nation those miscreants who have wickedly and
wantonly been the ruin of their country. O Liberty! O my Country!
LORD RELIGION. O Religion! O Virtue! whither art thou fleeing? O thou
Defender of the Faith? O ye mighty Lords and Commons! O ye deluded
Bishops, ye learned props of our unerring church, who preach up
vengeance, force and fire, instead of peace! be wise in time, lest the
Americans be driven to work out their own salvation without fear or
trembling.
[_Exeunt._
SCENE II.
LORD PATRIOT, BOLD IRISHMAN, COLONEL.
BOLD IRISHMAN.
That Brazen Lawyer,[7] that Lord Chancellor, that wou'd be, held forth
surprisingly last night, he beat the drum in your ears, brother soldier.
COLONEL. I think he did; he beat a Tatoo for us all.
LORD PATRIOT. No politicians, but lawyer politicians, it seems will go
down; if we believe him, we must all turn lawyers now, and prate away
the liberties of the nation.
COLONEL. Aye, first we must learn to rail at the clamourous faction,
disappointed politicians--ever restless--ever plotting--constantly
thwarting government, in laudable and blameable purposes.--Inconsiderable
party--inconsistent in their own politics--hostile to all government,
soured by disappointment, and urged by want--proceeding to unjustifiable
lengths--and then sound the magnanimity of a British senate, animated by
the sacred fire caught from a high-spirited people--
BOLD IRISHMAN. And the devil knows what beside--Magnanimity and sacred
fire, indeed!--Very magnanimous sounds, but pompous nothings! Why did he
not tell us where was the magnanimity of the British senate at the time
of the dispute about Falkland's Island? What sort of fire animated them
then?--Where was the high spirit of the people?--Strange sort of fire,
and strange sort of spirit, to give up to our inveterate enemies, the
Spaniards, our property unasked for, and cut our best friends and
brethren, the Americans' throats, for defending theirs against lawless
tyranny; their sacred fire became then all fume, and the strength of
their boasted spirits evaporated into invisible effluvium; the giant
then sunk sure enough spontaneously into a dwarf; and now, it seems, the
dwarf having been feeding upon smoky fire and evaporated spirits, is
endeavouring to swell himself into a giant again, like the frog in the
fable, till he bursts himself in silent thunder--But let the mighty
Philistine, the Goliath Paramount, and his oracle Mocklaw, with their
thunder bellowed from the brazen mortar-piece of a turn-coat lawyer,
have a care of the little American David!
LORD PATRIOT. Aye, indeed! America will prove a second Sampson to 'em;
they may put out his eyes for a while, but he'll pull their house down
about their ears for all that. Mr. Brazen seem'd surpris'd at the
thought of relinquishing America, and bawl'd out with the vociferation
of an old miser that had been robb'd--Relinquish America! relinquish
America! forbid it heavens! But let him and his masters take great care,
or America will save 'em the trouble, and relinquish Britain.
COLONEL. Or I'm much mistaken, Brazen says, establish first your
superiority, and then talk of negotiating.
LORD PATRIOT. That doctrine suits 'em best; just like a cowardly
pickpocket, or a bloody highwayman, knock a man down first, and then
tell him stand and deliver.
COLONEL. A just comparison, and excellent simile, by my soul! But I'm
surpris'd he did not include the Clergy among the number of professions
unfit (as he said) to be politicians.
BOLD IRISHMAN. Did you ever know a lawyer to be concerned with religion,
unless he got a fee by it? he'll take care and steer clear of that; if
it don't come in his way, he'll never break his neck over a church
bible, I warrant you--Mammon is his god--Judge Jeffereys is his
priest--Star-chamber doctrine is his creed--fire, flames and faggot,
blood, murder, halters and thund'ring cannon are the ceremonies of his
church--and lies, misrepresentations, deceit, hypocrisy and
dissimulation are the articles of his religion.
LORD PATRIOT. You make him a monster, indeed.
BOLD IRISHMAN. Not half so bad as he is, my Lord; he's following close
to the heels of that profound sage, that oracle, Mocklaw, his tutor: I
can compare the whole herd of them to nothing else but to the swine we
read of running headlong down the hill, Paramount their devil, Mocklaw
the evil spirit, and Brazen their driver.
COLONEL. And thus they'll drive liberty from out the land; but when a
brave people, like the Americans, from their infancy us'd to liberty
(not as a gift, but who inherit it as a birth-right, but not as a mess
of pottage, to be bought by, or sold to, ev'ry hungry glutton of a
minister) find attempts made to reduce them to slavery, they generally
take some desperate successful measure for their deliverance. I should
not be at all surpris'd to hear of independency proclaim'd throughout
their land, of Britain's armies beat, their fleets burnt, sunk, or
otherwise destroy'd. The same principle which Mr. Brazen speaks of, that
inspires British soldiers to fight, namely the ferment of youthful
blood, the high spirit of the people, a love of glory, and a sense of
national honour, will inspire the Americans to withstand them; to which
I may add, liberty and property.--But what is national honour? Why,
national pride.--What is national glory? Why, national nonsense, when
put in competition with liberty and property.
LORD PATRIOT. Of Britain I fear liberty has taken its farewell, the
aspiring wings of tyranny hath long hovered over, and the over-shadowing
influence of bribery hath eclips'd its rays and dark'ned its lustre; the
huge Paramount, that temporal deity, that golden calf, finds servile
wretches enough so base as to bow down, worship and adore his gilded
horns;--let 'em e'en if they will:--But as for me, tho' I should stand
alone, I would spurn the brute, were he forty-five[8] times greater than
he is; I'll administer, ere long, such an emetic to him, as shall make
the monster disgorge the forty millions yet unaccounted for, and never
shall it be said, that Patriot ever feared or truckled to him, or kept a
silent tongue when it should speak.
BOLD IRISHMAN. There I'll shake hands with you, and my tongue shall echo
in their ears, make their arched ceiling speak, the treasury bench
crack, and the great chair of their great speaker tremble, and never
will I cease lashing them, while lashing is good, or hope remains; and
when the voice of poor liberty can no longer be heard in Britain or
Hibernia, let's give Caledonia a kick with our heels, and away with the
goddess to the American shore, crown her, and defy the grim king of
tyranny, at his peril, to set his foot there.--Here let him stay, and
wallow in sackcloth and ashes, like a beast as he is, and,
Nebuchadnezzar-like, eat grass and thistles.
[_Exeunt._
_See Paramount, upon his awful throne,
Striving to make each freeman's purse his own!
While Lords and Commons most as one agree,
To grace his head with crown of tyranny.
They spurn the laws,--force constitution locks,
To seize each subject's coffer, chest and box;
Send justice packing, as tho' too pure unmix'd,
And hug the tyrant, as if by law he's fix'd._
FOOTNOTES:
[7] See Wedderburne's Speech.
[8] Alluding to North-Briton, Number forty-five.
ACT III.
SCENE I. _In Boston._
SELECTMAN, CITIZEN.
SELECTMAN.
At length, it seems, the bloody flag is hung out, the ministry and
parliament, ever studious in mischief, and bent on our destruction, have
ordered troops and ships of war to shut our ports, and starve us into
submission.
CITIZEN. And compel us to be slaves; I have heard so. It is a
fashionable way to requite us for our loyalty, for the present we made
them of Louisburg, for our protection at Duquesne, for the assistance we
gave them at Quebec, Martinico, Guadaloupe and the Havannah. Blast their
councils, spurn their ingratitude! Soul of Pepperel! whither art thou
fled?
SELECTMAN. They seem to be guided by some secret demon; this stopping
our ports and depriving us of all trade is cruel, calculated to starve
and beggar thousands of families, more spiteful than politic, more to
their own disadvantage than ours: But we can resolve to do without
trade; it will be the means of banishing luxury, which has ting'd the
simplicity and spotless innocence of our once happy asylum.
CITIZEN. We thank heaven, we have the necessaries of life in abundance,
even to an exuberant plenty; and how oft have our hospitable tables fed
numbers of those ungrateful monsters, who would now, if they could,
famish us?
SELECTMAN. No doubt, as we abound in those temporal blessings, it has
tempted them to pick our pockets by violence, in hopes of treasures more
to their minds.
CITIZEN. In that these thirsters after gold and human blood will be
disappointed. No Perus or Mexicos here they'll find; but the demon you
speak of, tho' he acts in secret, is notoriously known. Lord Paramount
is that demon, that bird of prey, that ministerial cormorant, that waits
to devour, and who first thought to disturb the repose of America; a
wretch, no friend to mankind, who acts thro' envy and avarice, like
Satan, who 'scap'd from hell to disturb the regions of paradise; after
ransacking Britain and Hibernia for gold, the growth of hell, to feed
his luxury, now waits to rifle the bowels of America.
SELECTMAN. May he prove more unsuccessful than Satan; blind politics,
rank infatuation, madness detestable, the concomitants of arbitrary
power! They can never think to succeed; but should they conquer, they'll
find that he who overcometh by force and blood, hath overcome but half
his foe. Capt. Preston's massacre is too recent in our memories; and if
a few troops dar'd to commit such hellish unprovok'd barbarities, what
may we not expect from legions arm'd with vengeance, whose leaders
harbour principles repugnant to freedom, and possess'd with more than
diabolical notions? Surely our friends will oppose them with all the
power heaven has given them.
CITIZEN. Nothing more certain; each citizen and each individual
inhabitant of America are bound by the ties of nature; the laws of God
and man justify such a procedure; passive obedience for passive slaves,
and non-resistance for servile wretches who know not, neither deserve,
the sweets of liberty. As for me and my house, thank God, such
detestable doctrine never did, nor ever shall, enter over my threshold.
SELECTMAN. Would all America were so zealous as you.--The appointment of
a general Continental Congress was a judicious measure, and will prove
the salvation of this new world, where counsel mature, wisdom and
strength united; it will prove a barrier, a bulwark, against the
encroachments of arbitrary power.
CITIZEN. I much approve of the choice of a congress; America is young,
she will be to it like a tender nursing mother, she will give it the
paps of virtue to suck, cherish it with the milk of liberty, and fatten
it on the cream of patriotism; she will train it up in its youth, and
teach it to shun the poison of British voluptuousness, and instruct it
to keep better company. Let us, my friend, support her all in our power,
and set on foot an immediate association; they will form an
intrenchment, too strong for ministerial tyranny to o'erleap.
SELECTMAN. I am determined so to do, it may prevent the farther effusion
of blood.