Well, we're jest about going it, at the reel "Grand Hotel," we are. We
had jest about the werry lovliest wedding here, larst week, as I ewer
seed, ewen with my great xperiense. Such a collekshun of brave-looking
men and reel handsum women as seldom meets together xcept on these
most hintresting occashuns. And as good luck wood have it, jest as
we was in the werry wirl and xcitement of it all, who should come in
to lunch but the same emminent yung Swell as cum about a munth ago.
And he had jest the same helegant but simple lunch as before, with a
bottle of the same splendid Champane, as before, and he didn't harf
finish it, as before, and not a drop of what he left was wasted, as
before; and so, when he paid me his little account, he arsked me if
many of the werry bewtifool ladies, as I had told him of when he came
larst, had been to the "Grand" lately, so the bold thort seized, me,
and I says to him, "Yes, your ---- ----, there's jest a nice few of
'em here now, and if you will kindly foller me up to our bewtifool
Libery, and will keep your eyes quite wide open as you gos along, you
will see jest about a hole room full of 'em."
[Illustration]
So I took him parst the grand room in which the Wedding Gests was
assembled, and there sure enuff, he seed such a collection of smiling
bewty, as ewidently made a great impression on his---- ----'s Art,
and one speshally lovely Bridesmade gave him a look, as he passed by,
as ewidently went rite thro it. I scarcely xpecs to be bleeved wen I
says, as his ---- ----'s cheeks quite blusht with hadmirashun, and he
turned round to me and says, says he, "Ah, Mr. ROBERT, if there was
many such reel lovely angels as that a flying about, I rayther thinks
as I shood be perswaded to turn a Bennedictus myself." I didn't at all
know what he meant, but I thort as it was werry credittable to him.
We got quite a chatting arterwards in the Libery, of course I don't
mean to say as I forgot for a moment the strornary difference atween
us, but he had werry ewidently been werry much struck by the lovely
Bridesmade, for he says, "Mr. ROBERT," says he, "what's about the rite
time for a man to marry?"
Of course I was reglar staggered, but I pulls myself together, and I
says, without not no hesitashun, "Jest a leetle under 30, your ----
----, for the Gent, and jest a leetle over 20 for the Lady, and then
the Gent gits just about 10 years advantage, which I thinks as he's
well entitled to." At which he larfs quite hartily, and he says, "Why
that wood keep me single for another ten years--but I will think it
over;" and, strange to say, jest as we passed again by the room as the
Bridal party was in, the same lovely Bridesmade happend to be near the
door, so they coud both have a good look at each other, and a hansum
cupple they was, if ever I seed one. And when his ---- ---- wished
me good day, which he did, quite in a frendly way, he added, with his
most bewtifool smile, "Ten years, MR. ROBERT, seems a long time to
wait for such a sweet angel as that!"
Ah, it's a rum world as we all lives in, and in nothink much rummer
than in the wunderfool power of a bewtifool face, ah, and as sumbody
says, for Wheel or for Wo, jest as it appens, more's the pitty.
I rayther thinks, as I gathers from the tork of the many yung swells
as we has dining here, that they are not altogether what I shoud call
a marrying race; they seems to think as there's allers plenty of time
for that sollem seremony when they're a good deal older.
Ah, of course it isn't for a poor old Hed Waiter to presume to adwise
young and hemenent swells, but my xperiense of uman life teaches me,
as the werry werry appiest time of a man's life is from 30 to about
40, perwided as he has been lucky enuff to secure for hisself a yung,
bewtifool, good-tempered, helegant, and ercomplished Bride, to, as the
Poet says, harve his sorrows, and dubble his joys.