CHAPTER XXIII

THE WARNING

Captain Bodine was halting serenely down into that new vista in his life

of which we have already spoken. Every day both promise and fulfilment

seemed richer than he had ever imagined any future experience could be. He

was domiciled in a home exactly to his taste; his cousin's brave, cheerful

spirit was infectious; the worry of financial straits was over, and Ella

was blooming and happy. These favorable changes in themselves would have

done much toward banishing gloom and despondency; but another element had

entered into his existence which was as unexpected as it was sweet. A

deep, subtile exhilaration was growing out of his companionship with Mara.

Every long, quiet talk that he enjoyed with her left a longing for

another. She was learning to regard him almost as a father, but he did not

think of her as he did of Ella. He loved Ella as his child, but her

buoyant spirit, her intense enjoyment of the present, and her eager,

hopeful eyes, fixed upon the future, separated her from him. He did not

wish it otherwise in her case, for he hoped that there was a happy future

for her, and he rejoiced daily over the gladness in her face. Mara,

although so young, seemed of his own generation. He often repeated to

himself his cousin's words, "She is as old as you are." She appeared to

live in the past as truly as himself. There was scarcely a subject on

which they were not in sympathy.

He believed that Mrs. Bodine was right, and that Mara was essentially

different from others of her age. Indeed the impression grew upon him that

the mysterious principle of heredity had prepared her for the

companionship which apparently was valued as much by her as by himself.

During the many hours in which he was alone, he thought the subject over

in all its aspects, as he supposed, and a hope, exquisitely alluring,

began to take form in his heart.

No man is without a certain amount of egotism and self-love, and, although

these were not characteristics of Bodine, he could not help dwelling upon

the truth that the remainder of his life would be very different from what

he had expected could Mara be near to him.

Her eloquent look of sympathy so soon after they met began to take the

form of prophecy. At first it led him to believe that she would receive a

paternal, loving regard, much the same as he gave to Ella; but, as time

passed, he began to dwell upon the possibility of a closer tie. She

appeared to have no especial friends among young men, nor indeed to care

for any. Might not a strong, quiet affection grow in each heart until they

could become one in the closest sense, even as they were now one in so

many of their thoughts and views?

It was natural that his deepening regard should tinge his manner, yet Mara

dreamed of nothing beyond the affection which she was glad to receive from

him. Vigilant eyes, however, were following Captain Bodine, and Clancy,

with a lover's jealous intuition, was guessing his rival's thoughts and

intentions more clearly every day. He did not adopt any system of

espionage, nor did he ask questions of any one, but merely took occasion

to walk on the Battery at an hour when it was most frequented. Here he

often saw Mara and the veteran enjoying the cool sunset hour, and

sometimes he observed that Mara saw him. So far from shunning such

observation, he not infrequently compelled her recognition, which was

always coldly bestowed upon her part.

"It would seem that Mr. Clancy is more inclined to be friendly than you

are," Bodine remarked one evening.

"Before Mr. Clancy valued Northern friends more than Southern ones we were

friendly," was Mara's quiet reply. She had schooled herself now into

outward self-control, but she chafed at his presence, and thought he

happened to be near her too frequently. Still it was ever will versus

heart, for the latter always acknowledged him as master.

He was satisfied that his impressions in regard to Bodine were correct,

and was impelled by his love to make an effort to save her from drifting

into relations which he believed must inevitably destroy her chance for

happiness. His strong, keen mind had analyzed her every word, tone, and

varying expression, and he had become quite sure that her bearing toward

him was not the result of indifference, but was rather due to pride, and a

resolute purpose not to yield to him unless he adopted her views. He also

understood her sufficiently well to dread lest a morbid sense of loyalty

to her father's memory might lead her to accept his friend and old

companion in arms.

"Her immediate associates would encourage the idea," he thought, "and

there are none to advise or warn her except myself. She is morbid and

unbalanced enough to commit just such a fatal error. Her bringing up, and

all the influence of that warped Mrs. Hunter, would lead her to sacrifice

herself to the manes of her ancestors. Yet how can I warn her--how can I

reach her except I write? I wish to look into her eyes when I speak. I

wish to plead with her with all the power that I possibly possess. Great

Heaven! if this that I fear should happen, what an awakening she might

have when it was too late!"

At last he resolved on the simplest and most straightforward course, and

wrote--

"MARA--Will you grant me one more interview--the last, unless you freely

concede others. I have something important to say to you, something that

relates far more to your happiness than to my own. In excuse for my

request, I have nothing better to plead than my love which you have

rejected, and yet which entitles me to some consideration. I think my

motive is unselfish--as unselfish as can be possible under the

circumstances. You may treat me as you please, but your welfare will

always be dear to me. I shall not seek to change your convictions, nor

shall I plead for myself, for I know that all this would be useless; but I

wish to see you face to face once more alone in your own home. I must also

request that Mrs. Hunter will not interfere with our interview. You are

not a child, and you know that I am a gentleman, and that I am incapable

of saying a word at variance with my profound respect for you. OWEN

CLANCY."

Mara was deeply agitated by this missive. Her first emotion was that of

anger, as much at herself as at him--a confused resentment that his words,

his very handwriting, should so move her, and that he should venture to

write at all. Had she not made it sufficiently plain that he had no right

to take, or, at least, to manifest any such interest in her affairs? Were

all her efforts futile to hide her love? In spite of her habit of reserve

and repression she had a passionate heart, and this fact had been forced

upon her by vain and continuous struggles. Had he the penetration to learn

the truth? She could not tell, and this uncertainty touched her pride to

the very quick. After hours of wavering purpose, impulses to ignore him

and his request, moments of tenderness in which will, pride, and every

consideration were almost overwhelmed, she at last arrived at a fixed

resolution. "I _will_ see him," she murmured. "He has virtually told me

that he will not give up what he terms his principles for love. I shall

not acknowledge my secret, but if he has discovered it, he shall learn

that I also will not give up my principles for love."

The next morning she quietly handed Clancy's note to Mrs. Hunter.

"Shameful!" ejaculated the lady. "Of course you will pay no attention to

him, or else write a curt refusal. I insist on one course or the other."

Mara looked steadfastly at her aunt until the worthy lady was somewhat

disconcerted, and asked fretfully, "What do you mean by that look, Mara?"

"Aunty, can't you realize that I am no longer a child, as he says?"

"Well, but in a case like this--"

"In a case like this which concerns me so personally, I must act according

to my own judgment. You can be in the adjoining room. Indeed I have no

objection to your hearing what is said, but I would rather you should not.

You have no occasion to fear. Mr. Clancy has alienated me forever. I have

no doubt that before the summer is over he will be engaged to Miss

Ainsley, if he is not already engaged virtually. I have reasons for

granting this final interview which are personal--which my self-respect

requires, and, since they are personal, I need not mention them. There

shall be no want of respect and affection for you, aunty, but you must

realize that I have become an independent woman, and I have the entire

right to decide certain questions for myself."

"Well, I wash my hands of it all," said Mrs. Hunter, coldly, "and since my

strong convictions have no weight with you, and you intend to act

independently of me, of course I shall not permit myself to hear a word of

your conversation."

"That will be the more delicate and honorable course, aunty."

"Well, Mara, I only wish I need not be in the house at the time."

"Aunty, that is the same as saying that your enmity toward Mr. Clancy is

greater than your love for me."

"But I don't see the use of this intensely disagreeable interview. This is

the only home I have."

"And the only home I have also, aunty."

"Oh, well, if you will, you will, I reckon."

"Yes, if I will, I _will_, and Mr. Clancy shall learn that I have a will."

As Aun' Sheba was departing that morning, Mara followed her into the

hallway, and, placing a note in her hand, said, "Give that to Mr. Clancy

and to no other. Say nothing to him or to any one else. Do you understand,

Aun' Sheba?"

"I does, honey. Wen you talk dataway you'se heah an eyster shoutin' 'fore

Aun' Sheba speak."

Clancy only said, "Thank you," as he thrust a half-dollar into the old

woman's hand.

Aun' Sheba laid it on the desk, and remarked with great dignity, "I does

some tings widout money."

He paid no heed to her, but read eagerly, "Mr. Clancy--Come this evening.

Mara Wallingford."

With a long breath he thought, "It will be my last chance. I fear it will

be useless, but at no future day shall she think in bitterness of heart,

'He might have done more to save me.'"

There was no sudden, involuntary illumination of her face on this occasion

when he entered her little parlor, and she could not help noticing that

his face was pale. She also saw from his expression that his spirit was as

high as hers; that there was not a trace of the lover, eager to plead his

cause. "He has pleaded successfully elsewhere," she thought, and, in spite

of all other conflicting feelings, she was curious to know what his motive

could be in seeking the interview.

"Good-evening, Mr. Clancy. Will you sit down?" she said, coldly.

"Yes, Mara. Pardon me for calling you Mara. I am beyond any affectation of

formality with you, and you know there is no lack of respect on my part."

She merely bowed and waited in silence.

"When you learn my motive for making my request, for coming here to-night,

you will probably resent it, but you have taught me to expect little else

except resentment from you."

"Mr. Clancy, there is no cause for such language. Certainly I was quietly

pursuing the even tenor of my way."

"Do you understand fully whither that way is leading?"

"Truly, Mr. Clancy, that is a singular question for you to ask."

"I understand you, Mara. You mean that it is no affair of mine."

He knew that her silence gave assent to this view, and he answered as if

she had spoken.

"Nevertheless you are mistaken. It _is_ an affair of mine. There could be

no peace for me in the future if I failed you now, for it seems to me I am

the only true friend you have in the world."

"Mr. Clancy," she said hotly, "we have differed so greatly before that I

might have been saved the pain of this interview, but we never differed as

we do at this moment. I cannot listen to you any longer. It would be

disloyalty to those who _are_ true friends--friends that I love and

honor."

"Do you love Captain Bodine?"

"Certainly I do. He was my father's friend; he is my honored friend."

"Do you _love_ Captain Bodine?"

"What do you mean?" she asked angrily, flushing to her very brow.

"Mara, be calm. Listen to me as you value your life, as you value your own

soul. Do you think I would come here for slight cause at such cost to us

both?"

"I think you are strangely mistaken in coming here, and using language

which makes me doubt your sanity."

"Please do me the justice to note that there is nothing wild in my manner,

nor any excitement in my words."

"Noting this, I find it more difficult to explain your course, or to

pardon it."

"It is not necessary at present, that you should do either. Please be

patient a few minutes longer and my mission is ended. I am not pleading

for myself, but for you. Please listen, or a time may come when in a

bitterness beyond words you may regret that you did not hear me. Thank

Heaven! it is clear that I have not come too late. Captain Bodine is more

than your friend in _his_ feelings; he is your lover, and you are so

morbid, unfriended, unguided, that you are capable of sacrificing

yourself--"

"Hush! you are wronging a man whom you are unworthy to name. He has never

dreamed of such love as you suggest."

"I am right. Oh, I have learned too deeply in the school of experience not

to know. My warning may be of no avail, but you shall not drift unawares

into this thing, you shall not enter into it, nor be persuaded into it

from a false spirit of self-sacrifice--"

"Mr. Clancy, I will not listen a moment longer to such preposterous

language. You are passing far beyond the limits of my forbearance. If your

conscience is burdened on my account because I am so 'unfriended,' I

absolve you fully. You will and do know how to console yourself. Our

interview must end here and now. It were disloyalty for me to listen a

moment longer. We are strangers from this day forth, Mr. Clancy." And she

rose flushed and trembling.

He also rose, and with an intent look which held her gaze, said gently:

"There is that which will speak although I am banished."

"What?"

"Your heart."

"If it broke a thousand times I will not speak to you again," she cried

passionately. "Even if you were right it would be ignoble to suggest such

a thing. Truly your associations have led you far from the promise of your

youth."

"I have not said that your heart would plead for me," he replied sternly.

"But it _will_ plead against all that is unnatural, contrary to your young

girlhood, contrary to the true, right instincts which God has created. You

may seek to stifle its voice, but you cannot. When you are alone it will

tell you, like the still small voice of God, that your obdurate will is

wrong, that your narrow prejudices and morbid memories are all wrong and

vain;--it will tell you that you cannot become the wife of this man, who

would sacrifice you as a solace to his remaining years, without wrecking

your happiness for life. Farewell, Mara Wallingford. There is one thing

you can never forget--that I warned you."

He bowed low and departed immediately.

The Earth Trembled · 第 23 / 48 章