ENGAGEMENT
Everlasting Pearl was now thirteen years old, and by many relatives and
friends her parents were urged to make arrangements for her future.
"You can keep her a few years before you marry her, but she certainly
ought to be engaged," was the advice given generally.
A middleman, therefore, had to be found. There are always numerous
applicants for that office, as not only is a good fee usually given,
but it is considered an honour to be entrusted with the future
arrangements for a young couple. On such occasions a great many
untruths are often told, which are only discovered after the marriage,
when it is too late to mend matters. In Everlasting Pearl's case, the
middleman was a relative, one of those who had been urging a speedy
engagement.
He took the girl's _Pah tsï_,[1] and went with these to a family of the
name of Hsü, who lived in a village four miles distant. The Cyclical
Characters were closely examined, and put in front of the ancestral
tablet, incense being lighted before them morning and evening. There
they remained for a month, and as nothing happened to disturb the peace
of the family during the interval--no child was hurt, no pig died, no
rice basin was broken--they were thought to augur only good luck, and
to promise well for the alliance of the two families. So Mr. Hsü made
out the "Cyclical Characters" of one of his sons, a young man
twenty-five years old. He then called in an astrologer, and asked him
to compare the two papers and give his verdict as to the advisability
of the two young people being joined in marriage. With an important
air, this gentleman examined the two papers put before him, and
announced that everything was in favour of such an alliance. Several
of their characters were alike, the two young people were both born
under the "Tiger," and other things agreed as well. Whereupon the two
families expressed their satisfaction, and declared themselves ready to
arrange for an engagement.
But now the middleman had a busy time of it, for there were many things
to settle before the engagement could take place. First of all, he
went to Mr. and Mrs. Tu, and asked how much money they would want for
their daughter. "As she is our only daughter, we want her to have a
good outfit," replied the parents, "so Mr. Hsü must give at least $40
and some good clothes." The list was then made out--$40, ten articles
of clothing, a ring, two bracelets, a pair of earrings, and three
silver hair ornaments. The indefatigable middleman took the list to
the Hsü family, who looked at it critically. After some time of
haggling over the different articles, they finally agreed to furnish
all, and preparations were begun in full earnest.
The day appointed for the engagement arrived, and there was great
excitement in the two homes which were filled with visitors and
well-wishers. The feast on both sides had to be provided by the young
man's family. About dinner-time, on the day appointed, a party, headed
by the middleman, was seen advancing toward Kucheng, carrying a sort of
wooden box or basket, with several trays, one piled on top of the
other. One tray carried all sorts of sweetmeats and the half of the
money, twenty dollars, wrapped in red paper. Another tray was filled
with pork and fish; again, another with different kinds of expensive
vegetables. Another carrier brought the engagement cake, and five
articles of clothing, and all the silver ornaments. Everywhere,
scattered among all the things, were cypress leaves, a symbol of
longevity and good luck.
On reaching the Tu home, the men with their precious burdens were
received with fire-crackers, and eagerly all the things were examined,
some of them meeting with approval, others with disapproval. After
dinner the party started off again for the Hsü home, taking the return
presents. These consisted of the following articles--a hat, a pair of
shoes and stockings, a sash, a number of embroidered purses, with a few
dollars in them, also some vegetable seeds, peanuts, sunflower seeds,
etc. Most of these things were graciously received by the young man
and his family, and the parents on both sides were satisfied.
The Engagement Agreement, as binding as a marriage certificate, had
been signed by the two families, and Everlasting Pearl's parents had
returned it to Mr. and Mrs. Hsü. The girl of thirteen had her future
settled for her before she had any idea of what such a future might
mean. Her little girl-friends teased her, but there was an added
respect in their treatment of her. She dimly realised that somehow she
had risen in their estimation and that of others. The change was
rather a pleasant one, the new clothes were a welcome addition to her
scanty wardrobe, and she was too young to worry about the future.
[Illustration: Writing the engagement document. As binding as a
marriage certificate.]
[1] The Eight Cyclical Characters appertaining to the hour of a
person's birth.