SUNLIGHT AND DARKNESS IN PALACE AND COTTAGE.
My pupils at the reform school were from the dens and hovels of the
Bowery, while those at S---- were from the palaces of Fifth Avenue;
but to my utter astonishment, the children of the slums were morally
and perhaps intellectually superior to those of the plutocrats. I
was occasionally the guest of both the poverty-stricken and the
millionaire parents of my scholars, and I verily believe that I saw as
much depravity and misery in the abodes of the rich as in those of the
poor.
On my arrival in Berkshire County, I found both of my employers were
off on a spree, and that I was ordered to do the work of receiving and
organizing. One day, a princely equipage with liveried coachman and
outrider halted at the schoolroom door, a "bloated bondholder" and his
wife, arrayed in purple, fine linen, and diamonds, pulled a flashily
appareled, humpbacked boy up to me, every lineament of whose face
showed depravity and cunning. "There," said the father, "is my d----
d son, he drinks, swears, and breaks all the commandments every day.
Take him, and send the bill to me." He handed me his card and away
they went.
This was not an isolated case. I did my best for them; but they were
satiated with luxury, hated books, and seemed to care for nothing
but debauchery. The very next day several of these scamps obtained
permission to visit the cave in "Bear Mountain," where ice could be
found throughout the year. As they did not return on time, I went
in search and found them all drunk. They had no appreciation of the
sun-kissed mountains, waving forests, or verdure-clad valleys; the
grand scenery awakened no responsive smiles, no ennobling aspirations;
they were intent upon nothing but drowning their ignoble souls in the
noxious fumes of tobacco and alcohol. I tumbled them into the wagon,
drove them to their dormitory and put them to bed, lower than the
beasts they seemed to be in their depravity; not all to be sure, for
there were a few choice spirits like Julian Hawthorn, who followed to
some extent the example of his illustrious father, and has won his
spurs in literature.
I found to my disgust that bad eggs would ruin the good ones; but that
many good ones could not take the rottenness from even one of the bad.
It seemed a hopeless task to endeavor to inspire such impoverished
souls, and I retired in despair, to accept the principalship of the
ancient academy in the village.
Here I met the children of the so-called middle class, the very bone
and sinew of the Republic; here I was monarch of all I surveyed, and
untrammeled by the cramming regulations of the public schools, I
pursued the delightful avocation of a true educator. E and duco is the
etymology of the word, to lead out, to develop the latent energies of
the mind. I had chemical and philosophical apparatus with which to
perform experiments in illustrative teaching of the sciences, and all
were intent upon acquiring thorough, practical education.
When I saw their enthusiasm lagging from want of physical exercise, at
the tap of the bell, we would all rush out upon the beautiful campus
and kick football, or run races until, with glowing faces and
invigorated energies, they would follow me back to our studies,
sometimes into the cheerful academy hall, sometimes under the shade of
the noble oaks, where we would study botany close to nature's heart
amid the songs of birds and the sublime chanting of the tree-tops.
We gave musical and dramatic entertainments, securing ample funds to
decorate the walls of our hall with works of art; we went on rides
together in barges, drank in long draughts of inspiration from the
glorious scenery, and studied geology, practically, like, if not equal
to Hugh Miller, among the rocks and boulders. I was doing good, and
here I should have remained; but the old unrest came back to me, and I
unwisely accepted a much larger salary in teaching in my native county
of Essex.
As soon as I took command of my two hundred boys and girls in B----,
I realized how vast is the contrast between free and unrestricted
educating, and the grind of cramming according to the ironclad rule of
the public school system.
Many children are so crammed with everything that they really
know nothing. In proof of this, read these veritable specimens of
definitions, written by public school children that very year in
another school of this town.
"Stability is the taking care of a stable."
"A mosquito is the child of black and white parents."
"Monastery is the place for monsters."
"Tocsin is something to do with getting drunk."
"Expostulation is to have the smallpox."
"Cannible is two brothers who killed each other in the
Bible."
"Anatomy is the human body, which consists of three parts,
the head, the chist and the stummick. The head contains the
eyes and brains, if any; the chist contains the lungs and a
piece of the liver. The stummick is devoted to the bowels, of
which there are five, a, e, i, o, u, and sometimes w, and y."
Every teacher was rated according to his ability to secure from his
pupils a high percentage in examinations for promotion.
I grew restless under the restraints imposed by a committee of
incompetents; besides, the minister who was chairman of the Board,
considered a Unitarian to be an infidel, demoralizing the religious
life of the young. I grew tired of his malicious peccadillos, and
accepted a "louder" call from that quaint town where the historic
Lloyd Ireson "with his hord horrt was torrd and futhered und Korrid in
a Kort by the wimmun o' Marrble ed."
Here I had one hundred boys in one room, many of whom went fishing in
summer to get up muscle to lick the schoolmaster in winter. They had
been quite successful in this latter industry for several years in my
school, and at once proceeded to try the same tactics with me. On the
first morning, I was saluted with a volley of iced snow balls as hard
as brickbats, and I at once reciprocated these favors by knocking
down the leader, dragging him into the house, and giving him a sound
cowhiding, and when the vinegar-faced committee came in later I was
busily engaged in teaching their sons to dance to this same useful
instrument.
These owl-like worthies sat solemnly on the platform for awhile,
saying no more than the ugly fowls they so much resembled, and then
stalked out, leaving me to my fate. A young Hercules fisherman at once
suggested, that the first business in order was to throw me out the
window as they had so many of my predecessors. To this I stoutly
objected, and seizing a big hickory stick window-elevator, I swung it
fiercely close to their heads. This was more than they had bargained
for, and the uproar pro tem subsided.
This was the winter famed in the history of Massachusetts, as
producing the severest snowstorm ever known, and for a week I was
snow-bound in my boarding-house, where my bright-eyed, sweet-faced
cousins were most agreeable substitutes for my plug-ugly pupils.
One day, this same week, the giant ringleader of my assailants who
had moved to baptize me by immersion in the icy waters of the harbor,
himself, while fishing, fell through a hole in the ice and was
drowned. The loss of their mighty general somewhat demoralized his
followers, and _vi et armis_, I managed to survive the fourteen weeks'
term. At the close of the first session of the last day, I threw a
football to my enemies, who, not suspecting my trick, rushed off,
kicking it down the street, and when they returned in the afternoon to
take vengeance upon me for my unprecedented rule over them, I was in
the "hub of the universe." I afterwards learned that my discretion
was the better part of valor, for my ferocious pupils had the
determination and the necessary force to send me unshriven to Davy
Jones' locker.
I had never believed in the doctrine of reincarnation until I met in
the city, the veritable Judas Iscariot, ready and anxious to sell
anybody and everything for thirty pieces of silver, nickel, copper,
or any old thing he could pick up. This Jew pretended to wish to sell
one-half interest in his commercial school for $2,000. I had some
negotiations with him, but found out, by careful investigation, that
he had already sold several confiding teachers, who ascertained too
late to save their money, that this fraud was collector and treasurer
of all funds of the company, that he required his partner to do all
the drudgery, and that his report always claimed that all collections
had been paid out for expenses.
He reminded me of the legend, that when the devil took Christ to the
top of a high mountain, showed Him all the kingdoms of the earth, and
said: "All these things will I give you to fall down and worship
me." Suddenly, the face of a Shylock appeared, saying: "Shentlemen,
peeshness ish peeshness, and if you can't trade, I will take dat
offer."
I mention this little incident hoping it may prove a warning to the
unwary who, like myself, may fall among the sharpers of the Modern
Athens. Disgusted with this business experience, and wishing to do
good and get good, I advertised, offering $50 for an acceptable
position as teacher, and I at once received many responses from
thrifty committeemen, and retiring teachers.
I interviewed a clergyman who wanted the reward in advance; but when
the time came for him to deliver the goods, he had suddenly decamped
in the night to avoid a coat of tar and feathers from indignant
parents whose children's morals had been basely ruined by this wolf
in sheep's clothing. Others extended itching palms for the money, but
failed to secure for me the "_sine qua non_."
At last, an impecunious teacher in W----, who was retiring to accept
a "louder" call in Boston, introduced me to his Board as a particular
friend whom he had known for many years, (he had never seen me
before), and vouched for me as one of the greatest of living
instructors.
When the three doctors, constituting the school board, were about to
give me a searching examination, which doubtless would have floored
me, prearranged calls summoned them to see pretended patients, and on
the mercenary pedagogue's assurance that I was a university graduate,
they hastily signed my commission and I was saved.
I shall always remember my two years' experience in this beautiful
town, with much pleasure and pride. On the opening of the school I
found myself looking upon over one hundred of the finest appearing
boys and girls I had ever beheld, seated in a noble new hall well
equipped with organ and all the apparatus which wealth could procure.
Soon after the opening exercises, the usual trial of the new master
commenced, and a stifling, choking odor threw all into convulsions
of coughing, almost to strangulation. Some one had thrown a large
quantity of cayenne pepper down the register. I quietly opened the
windows, and when the noxious fumes had passed away, the new principal
said:
"I feel sure that the pleasant outward appearance of my family here is
an expression of the inward goodness and honor of you all, and I am
confident that the perpetrator of this disagreeable mischief will take
pride in removing suspicion from his companions by rising in his seat
and apologizing for his thoughtless rudeness."
A fine, manly looking boy at once arose. "Come up here, my friend, and
let us talk it over," I said, and he came and stood by my side. "We
are all brothers and sisters here, and I have no doubt you, Arthur,
will now express your regrets for what you have done." He did so, the
audience applauded, and the incident was closed.
The new master's manner was such a decided contrast to that of his
"knock down and drag out" predecessor, that it captivated his
protégés at the start, and this was the only unpleasant episode in my
delightful intercourse with these charming children.
I established a society called the "Class of Honor," which soon
comprised my entire family. Every pupil who had no marks against him
or her for failures in scholarship or deportment, was decorated with
a blue ribbon, and when he had earned and worn this for one month, he
was presented with a handsome diamond shaped pin on which was engraved
the words "class of honor." They were prouder of this decoration than
ever were the imperial guard of Napoleon of the Cross of the Legion.
If a pupil failed on some point in recitation, he could retrieve
himself by reciting it correctly later with extra information on the
point, gathered from the reference books, and thus he was saved
from humiliation and discouragement, and at the same time, he was
stimulated to making independent researches in the school and public
libraries. Each class of honor pupil could whisper, go out, or go to
the blackboards to draw or cipher without asking permission. The
high sense of honor was thus developed which is so essential to a
successful career.
We had a system of light gymnastics which, with military drill, gave
grace and erectness to the carriage, and every Friday afternoon,
the large hall was crowded with the parents to enjoy the singing,
declamations, gymnastics, dramatics, and drawing exercises, and all
went merry as a marriage bell.
My salary was raised voluntarily every six months; I enjoyed their
games with them in our ample playgrounds. We often, on holidays,
roamed the woods and seashore together; I often dined with them in
their homes, and at picnics; on all public occasions I was one of the
principal speakers, and my life was an ideal one in all respects save
one. For some cause the air of the valley, too often impregnated
with moisture from the sluggish Abajona, kept my throat in an almost
chronic state of irritation, and too frequently for days at a time,
I could hardly speak above a whisper. Had it not been for this one
serious handicap, I think I would gladly have remained there for life.
I kept a saddle horse, and often cantered twenty miles to my father's
house, and my boat on the lake furnished many a pleasant sail for
myself and pupils.
One incident shows the appreciation of my pupils and neighbors for my
efforts in their behalf. During the first campaign of General Grant
for the presidency, many of my pupils and I joined the W--Battalion of
uniformed and torch bearing "Tanners." We marched to the city as an
escort for speakers at a Republican rally. When the hoodlums smashed
our lanterns with rocks, our captain, the son of a distinguished
statesman, retreated; but I lost my head and charged the rioters,
using my torch handle vigorously; I was cut off from my company of
which I was lieutenant, and captured by the Democrats. As soon as my
men realized this, they rushed upon my captors _en masse_; many
heads were broken, but I was rescued and carried to the train on the
shoulders of my heroic defenders.
If my foresight had been half so good as my hindsight, I would never
have left W----, but the tempter came in the form of an offer of a
much larger salary from N----, and I foolishly accepted.
The change from W--to N----, was like that from breezy, sunny green
fields, where wild birds sang their free, joyous songs, and where wild
flowers bloomed free as air exhaling their sweet perfumes, to the
suffocating air of a hothouse where the birds drooped in cages and
where the few flowers were forced into existence by steam heat and
unsavory fertilizers. In the former the people were social, natural
and free from the trammels of tyrannical fashions; in the latter they
were cold, distant, and valued you according to the size of your bank
account and the number of your horses and servants. In the one the
teachers were educators, free to develop superior methods along their
own original lines; in the other they were mere machines to carry out
the ironclad rules of the opinionated precedent-hunting school board.
In the former all seemed like one great family sympathizing and
loving; in the latter the newly-rich set the pace of ignoble luxury
and display; while the others aped their ways which led many to
bankruptcy, poverty, and misery. In the one you were free from all
social ostracism if you worshipped according to the dictates of your
own conscience; in the other you were ignored and disliked unless you
attended and contributed liberally for the support of the palatial
orthodox church.
I was early told that I would fail if I persisted in attending the
little Unitarian church; but I preferred failure to hypocrisy, and
would not sell my birthright of conscience for a mess of pottage.
Two of my ancient, sour-faced assistants were bigoted members of the
fashionable church, and at once set me down as a corruptor of youth
because I was an advocate of the liberal faith. The venomous spite of
one of these forcibly suggested the spirit of the inquisition, and one
day she found her blackboard decorated with the following truthful
poem, suggested by her spirit and the first syllable of her name:
"Old Aunt Dunk
Is a mean old skunk."
She flew into a furious rage, declared that some Unitarian must have
perpetrated this insult, and that I must find the culprit.
She never forgave me because I failed to do so, and at her urgent
solicitation the minister, after great exertion, secured a few
signatures to a petition for my discharge on the plea that I chewed
tobacco and expectorated on the floor in the presence of my class.
As I easily proved that I never chewed tobacco, and as my patrons
presented an overwhelming protest, the prayer of the petitioners was
unanimously refused by the school board.
It would have been laughable had it not been so serious and pitiful,
to see the frantic attempts of the poor in this town to keep up
appearances, and counterfeit the style of those who had grown rich by
cheating widows and orphans in bucket shops and stock gambling. The
little minnows put on all the snobbish airs of the whales who had
grown so large by devouring all the small fish in their business seas.
One pillar of the church, who was a cashier, ruined his bank by
stealing money to enable him, for a while, to live in an elegant house
and support servants, equipages, silks and diamonds galore. For a time
he was the idol of the town, while he gave costly dinners and showered
his ill-gotten gains to embellish his favorite temple, and to build a
tower upon it to look down in contempt upon all the lesser shrines.
He barely escaped the sheriff at night-time, and fled beyond the seas,
leaving his showy family to poverty and the ill-concealed derision of
those who worshipped them while they were supposed to be rich.
Such as these made life very uncomfortable for me, and at the end of
my year, I left in disgust; never again to resume the profession in
which I had spent so many years of my somewhat checkered existence.
My life seemed a failure; I reflected long upon the question of the
Psalmist, "What is man?" and here are the answers which I culled from
many thoughtful poets, whose names are appended to their several
replies.
In this grand wheel, the world, we're spokes made all;--
(_Brome_.)
He who climbs high, endangers many a fall;--(_Chaucer_.)
A passing gleam called life is o'er us thrown,--(_Story_.)
It glimmers, like a meteor, and is gone.--(_Rogers_.)
To-morrow's sun to thee may never rise--(_Congreve_.)
The flower that smiles to-day, to-morrow dies--(_Shelly_.)
And what do we, by all our bustle gain?--(_Pomfret_.)
A drop of pleasure in a sea of pain.--(_Tupper_.)
Tired of beliefs, we dread to live without;--(_Holmes_.)
Yet who knows most, the more he knows to doubt.--(_Daniel_.)
Princes and lords are but the breath of kings.--(_Burns_.)
And trifles make the sum of human things.--(_More_.)
If troubles overtake thee, do not wail;--(_Herbert_.)
Our thoughts are boundless, though our frames are
frail.--(_Percival_.)
The fiercest agonies have shortest reign;--(_Bryant_.)
Great sorrows have no leisure to complain.--(_Gaffe_.)
One touch of nature makes the whole world kin,--(_Shakespeare_.)
For we the same are that our sires have been;--(_Knox_.)
Nor is a true soul ever born for naught,--(_Lowell_.)
Yet millions never think a noble thought.--(_Bailey_.)
Good actions crown themselves with lasting bays,--(_Heath_.)
And God fulfils Himself in many ways.--(_Tennyson_.)
The world's a wood in which all lose their way--(_Buckingham_.)
A fair where thousands meet, but none can stay;--(_Fawkes_.)
To sport their season, and be seen no more,--(_Cowper_.)
Till tired they sleep, and life's poor play is o'er.--(_Pope_.)