SPOSIN' it's pictures that's on the carpet, wait till you hear the name
of the painter. If it's Rubens, or any o' them old boys, praise, for
it's agin the law to doubt them; but if it's a new man, and the company
ain't most especial judges, criticise. "A leetle out o' keeping," says
you. "He don't use his grays enough, nor glaze down well. That shadder
wants depth. General effect is good, though parts ain't. Those eyebrows
are heavy enough for stucco," says you, and other unmeaning terms like
these. It will pass, I tell you. Your opinion will be thought great.
Them that judged the cartoons at Westminster Hall, knew plaguey little
more nor that. But if this is a portrait of the lady of the house,
hangin' up, or it's at all like enough to make it out, stop--gaze on it,
walk back, close your fingers like a spy-glass, and look through 'em
amazed like--enchanted--chained to the spot. Then utter, unconscious
like, "That's a most beautiful pictur'. By heavens! that's a speakin'
portrait. It's well painted, too. But whoever the artist is, he is an
unprincipled man." "Good gracious!" she'll say, "how so?" "'Cause,
madam, he has not done you justice."--_Sam Slick._