ALONE
It was late in the afternoon when Tom alighted at Catskill. It seemed
good to see the familiar surroundings in the riverside town which was so
much frequented by the scouts from Temple Camp. There was Sholsen’s
Sweet Shop where they bought sodas and cones. There was the platform
outside the grain and feed store where they waited for the bus and
jollied Pee-wee. It was all like a balm to Tom’s troubled mind.
He soon forgot his red-headed companion of the ride and thought of Audry
and felt ashamed of his dilly-dallying. A fine mess he had made of it so
far. Twenty miles or more above Kingston! The whole day had gone for
nothing.
He felt weak, inefficient. And he had an unpleasant feeling of being an
idle wanderer. He was ashamed of his aimlessness, the very quality which
Audry had such a high contempt for in the men. That made him think of
the men, of the inventor and the chauffeur without a license and
Fairgreaves and all of them. And Whalen. He wondered what they were
doing at that minute....
He was not in a hurry to go to Temple Camp. He had an odd feeling that
they would wonder why he came, and suspect something amiss. Besides he
wished not to face old Caleb Dyker. He thought he would wait until after
dark before starting. Then by the time he reached camp, old Caleb would
be in bed.
It did not increase his self esteem thus to loiter and kill time in
order to avoid some one. He felt rather shiftless to have to hang around
Catskill for three or four hours. What would Audry think of such a
thing? Why had he not gone about his stern duty in Kingston instead of
coming way up here?
He strolled down to the river where he thought it would be cooler. A
little north of the Day Line landing was an old float from which the
scouts had sometimes fished for killies. A fishing skiff was drawn
partway on it. It belonged to Louis who lived in the little house
nearby. That was the only name he had—Louis.
Tom sat on an old water-soaked crate that had been rescued from the
river. He felt tired now—and lonesome. And utterly miserable. Near him
stood a small rusty can and he kicked it idly with his foot and knocked
it over. As it rolled away over the float it left a little scattered
pile of damp earth full of wriggling angleworms. He watched one of these
squirm a yard or two. Then a swallow swooped gracefully down and picked
it up. He wondered about the bird which Whalen had befriended and
whether it had flown away.
The gathering twilight increased his disconsolate feeling. But it was
cooler by the river, or else the weather was changing. A freshening
breeze blew in his face and he opened his shirt front and clutched his
shirt away from his chest and shoulders so as to enjoy the fullest
measure of relief the welcome breeze afforded. A single cloud appeared
in the sky. The boat began bobbing and made a clamorous noise as its
stern beat the water and its bow knocked against the float.
Out in the middle of the river, and bathed in the rich glow of the
sunset, was his friend the _Goodfellow_. She was dancing in the choppy
water and her glazed port-holes shone golden. She seemed sportive and
carefree. A shimmering path ran from her almost to Tom’s very feet as if
to give him safe conduct to her hospitable deck. It was funny how this
sunlit way ran straight from him to her. And now she turned about, her
graceful prow straight toward him, and seemed to bow a kind of welcome
to him.
The _Goodfellow_!
The cloud in the sky grew larger and darker. This unbearable day had
tempted the storm demon. Relief, if only for a short while, was coming
at last.
It was not now in the spirit of covetousness that Tom longed to be upon
the trim little cruiser. He would not think of buying her, not unless
Anson Dyker, answering the charge of murder, should refuse the money
which he, Tom, would, oh so gladly, proffer. But it seemed isolated out
there, and that accorded with his mood. He was overwhelmed and borne
down by the grim duty, which was his. How could a thing which made him
feel so contemptible, so despicable, be a good thing to do. “_It is
your, accusation, you’re a part of the state._” How logical, clear,
true, was Audry’s reasoning. Of course she was right. She had read books
and all that and she knew.
Tom wondered what Whalen—Dyker—would say, and how he would act, when
they went up there to get him. Tom thought he would just give that weary
look, lay down his axe and follow the men, the detectives. Perhaps it
would even be a relief to him. Would he have to know that Tom was the
one—the good citizen? He would just say good-bye to the men in that
taciturn way of his; he could never be excited, he could never be
otherwise than brave—_never_. Tom was glad to think that there was one
up there who would be loyal, elegantly loyal, and try to cheer him.
Fairgreaves. He was all right, Fairgreaves. Cutaway coat and derby hat
and royal manner, but he was all right.
He hardly saw where he was going, so deep and vivid was his musing. And
so utterly wretched was he. In a kind of trance he went to the little
house and asked if he might use the boat. Louis knew him and gave a
ready consent. He was proud to be of service to the young assistant at
Temple Camp. Then the next thing he knew, he was out upon the river
rowing toward his first love, the _Goodfellow_.
His going was not quite so aimless as his journey away from Kingston,
for now he had an hour or two that must be passed somehow. And he wanted
to be alone. It seemed to him like a night before execution. Out there
he would decide just what he would say in Kingston—the very first thing
in the morning. It had to be done so he might as well do it early.
But now he wanted to be alone.