out that Marcus had most of the votes. After conferring apart with his
father,(675) Zeus bade Hermes make a proclamation as follows: “Know all ye
mortals who have entered this contest, that according to our laws and
decrees the victor is allowed to exult but the vanquished must not
complain. Depart then wherever you please, and in future live every one of
you under the guidance of the gods. Let every man choose his own guardian
and guide.” After this announcement, Alexander hastened to Heracles, and
Octavian to Apollo, but Marcus attached himself closely to Zeus and
Kronos. Caesar wandered about for a long time and ran hither and thither,
till mighty Ares and Aphrodite took pity on him and summoned him to them.
Trajan hastened to Alexander and sat down near him. As for Constantine, he
could not discover among the gods the model of his own career, but when he
caught sight of Pleasure, who was not far off, he ran to her. She received
him tenderly and embraced him, then after dressing him in raiment of many
colours and otherwise making him beautiful, she led him away to
Incontinence. There too he found Jesus, who had taken up his abode with
her and cried aloud to all comers: “He that is a seducer, he that is a
murderer, he that is sacrilegious and infamous, let him approach without
fear! For with this water will I wash him and will straightway make him
clean. And though he should be guilty of those same sins a second time,
let him but smite his breast and beat his head and I will make him clean
again.” To him Constantine came gladly, when he had conducted his sons
forth from the assembly of the gods. But the avenging deities none the
less punished both him and them for their impiety, and exacted the penalty
for the shedding of the blood of their kindred,(676) until Zeus granted
them a respite for the sake of Claudius and Constantius.(677))
[C] Σοὶ δέ, πρὸς ἡμᾶς λέγων ὁ Ἑρμῆς, δέδωκα τὸν πατέρα Μίθραν ἐπιγνῶναι·
σὺ δ᾽ αὐτοῦ τῶν ἐντολῶν ἔχου, πεῖσμα καὶ ὅρμον ἀσφαλῆ ζῶντί τε σεαυτῷ
παρασκευάζων, καὶ ἡνίκα ἂν ἐνθένδε ἀπιέναι δέῃ, μετὰ τῆς ἀγαθῆς ἐλπίδος
ἡγεμόνα θεὸν εὐμενῆ καθιστὰς σεαυτῷ.
(“As for thee,” Hermes said to me, “I have granted thee the knowledge of
thy father Mithras. Do thou keep his commandments, and thus secure for
thyself a cable and sure anchorage throughout thy life, and when thou must
depart from the world thou canst with good hopes adopt him as thy guardian
god.”)
MISOPOGON, OR, BEARD‐HATER
Introduction
Julian came to Antioch on his way to Persia in the autumn of 361 and
stayed there till March, 362. The city was rich and important
commercially, but in Julian’s eyes her glory depended on two things, the
famous shrine of Apollo and the school of rhetoric; and both of these had
been neglected by the citizens during the reign of Constantius. A
Christian church had been built in Apollo’s grove in the suburb of Daphne,
and Libanius, Antioch’s most distinguished rhetorician, was more highly
honoured at Nicomedia.(678) Julian’s behaviour at Antioch and his failure
to ingratiate himself with the citizens illustrates one of the causes of
the failure of his Pagan restoration. His mistake was that he did not
attempt to make Paganism popular, whereas Christianity had always been
democratic. He is always reminding the common people that the true
knowledge of the gods is reserved for philosophers; and even the old
conservative Pagans did not share his zeal for philosophy. Antioch
moreover was a frivolous city. The Emperor Hadrian three centuries earlier
had been much offended by the levity of her citizens, and the homilies of
Saint Chrysostom exhibit the same picture as Julian’s satire. His austere
personality and mode of life repelled the Syrian populace and the corrupt
officials of Antioch. They satirised him in anapaestic verses, and either
stayed away from the temples that he restored or, when they did attend in
response to his summons, showed by their untimely applause of the Emperor
that they had not come to worship his gods. Julian’s answer was this
satire on himself which he addresses directly to the people of Antioch.
But he could not resist scolding them, and the satire on his own habits is
not consistently maintained. After he had left the city the citizens
repented and sent a deputation to make their peace with him, but in spite
of the intercession of Libanius, who had accompanied him to Antioch, he
could not forgive the insults to himself or the irreverence that had been
displayed to the gods.
[337] ΙΟΥΛΙΑΝΟΥ ΑΥΤΟΚΡΑΤΟΡΟΣ
(Julian, Emperor)
ΑΝΤΙΟΧΙΚΟΣ(679) Η ΜΙΣΟΠΩΓΩΝ
(Antiochene, or Beard‐Hater)
Ἀνακρέοντι τῷ ποιητῇ πολλὰ ἐποιήθη μέλη χαρίεντα· τρυφᾶν γὰρ ἔλαχεν ἐκ
μοιρῶν· Ἀλκαίῳ δ᾽ οὐκέτι οὐδ᾽ Ἀρχιλόχῳ τῷ Παρίῳ τὴν μοῦσαν ἔδωκεν ὁ θεὸς
εἰς εὐφροσύνας καὶ ἡδονὰς τρέψαι· μοχθεῖν γὰρ ἄλλοτε ἄλλως ἀναγκαζόμενοι
τῇ μουσικῇ πρὸς τοῦτο ἐχρῶντο, [B] κουφότερα ποιοῦντες αὑτοῖς ὅσα ὁ δαίμων
ἐδίδου τῇ εἰς τοὺς ἀδικοῦντας λοιδορίᾳ. ἐμοὶ δὲ ἀπαγορεύει μὲν ὁ νόμος ἐπ᾽
ὀνόματος αἰτιᾶσθαι τοὺς ἀδικουμένους μὲν οὐδέν, εἶναι δ᾽ ἐπιχειροῦντας
δυσμενεῖς, ἀφαιρεῖται δὲ τὴν ἐν τοῖς μέλεσι μουσικὴν ὁ νῦν ἐπικρατῶν ἐν
τοῖς ἐλευθέροις τῆς παιδείας τρόπος. αἴσχιον γὰρ εἶναι δοκεῖ νῦν μουσικὴν
ἐπιτηδεύειν, ἢ πάλαι ποτὲ ἐδόκει τὸ πλουτεῖν ἀδίκως. [C] οὐ μὴν ἀφέξομαι
διὰ τοῦτο τῆς ἐμοὶ δυνατῆς ἐκ μουσῶν ἐπικουρίας. ἐθεασάμην τοι καὶ τοὺς
ὑπὲρ τὸν Ῥῆνον βαρβάρους ἄγρια μέλη λέξει πεποιημένα παραπλησίᾳ τοῖς
κρωγμοῖς τῶν τραχὺ βοώντων ὀρνόθων ᾄδοντας καὶ εὐφραινομένους ἐπὶ τοῖς
μέλεσιν. [338] εἶναι γὰρ οἶμαι συμβαίνει τοῖς φαύλοις τὴν μουσικὴν
λυπηροῖς μὲν τοῖς θεάτροις, σφίσι δ᾽ αὐτοῖς ἡδίστοις. ὁ δὴ καὶ αὐτὸς
ξυννοήσας εἴωθα πρὸς ἐμαυτὸν λέγειν ὅπερ ὁ Ἰσμηνίας οὐκ ἀπὸ τῆς ἴσης μὲν
ἕξεως, ἀπὸ δὲ τῆς ὁμοίας, ὡς ἐμαυτὸν πείθω, μεγαλοφροσύνης, ὅτι δῆτα ταῖς
μούσαις ᾄδω καὶ ἐμαυτῷ.
(Anacreon the poet composed many delightful songs; for a luxurious life
was allotted to him by the Fates. But Alcaeus and Archilochus of
Paros(680) the god did not permit to devote their muse to mirth and
pleasure. For constrained as they were to endure toil, now of one sort,
now of another, they used their poetry to relieve their toil, and by
abusing those who wronged them they lightened the burdens imposed on them
by Heaven. But as for me, the law forbids me to accuse by name those who,
though I have done them no wrong, try to show their hostility to me; and
on the other hand the fashion of education that now prevails among the
well‐born deprives me of the use of the music that consists in song. For
in these days men think it more degrading to study music than once in the
past they thought it to be rich by dishonest means. Nevertheless I will
not on that account renounce the aid that it is in my power to win from
the Muses. Indeed I have observed that even the barbarians across the
Rhine sing savage songs composed in language not unlike the croaking of
harsh‐voiced birds, and that they delight in such songs. For I think it is
always the case that inferior musicians, though they annoy their
audiences, give very great pleasure to themselves. And with this in mind I
often say to myself, like Ismenias—for though my talents are not equal to
his, I have as I persuade myself a similar independence of soul—“I sing
for the Muses and myself.”(681))
Τὸ δ᾽ ᾆσμα πεζῇ μὲν λέξει πεποίηται, λοιδορίας δ᾽ ἔχει πολλὰς καὶ μεγάλας,
οὐκ εἰς ἄλλους μὰ Δία· [B] πῶς γάρ; ἀπαγορεύοντος τοῦ νόμου· εἰς δὲ τὸν
ποιητὴν αὐτὸν καὶ τὸν ξυγγραφέα. τὸ γὰρ εἰς ἑαυτὸν γράφειν εἴτε ἐπαίνους
εἴτε ψόγους εἴργει νόμος οὐδείς. ἐπαινεῖν μὲν δὴ καὶ σφόδρα ἐθέλων ἐμαυτὸν
οὐκ ἔχω, ψέγειν δὲ μυρία, καὶ πρῶτον ἀρξάμενος ἀπὸ τοῦ προσώπου. τούτῳ γὰρ
οἶμαι φύσει γεγονότι μὴ λίαν καλῷ μηδ᾽ εὐπρεπεῖ μηδ᾽ ὡραίῳ ὑπὸ δυστροπίας
καὶ δυσκολίας αὐτὸς [C] προστέθεικα τὸν βαθὺν τουτονὶ πώγωνα, δίκας αὐτὸ
πραττόμενος, ὡς ἔοικεν, οὐδενὸς μὲν ἄλλου, τοῦ δὲ μὴ φύσει γενέσθαι καλόν.
ταῦτά τοι διαθεόντων ἀνέχομαι τῶν φθειρῶν ὥσπερ ἐν λόχμῃ τῶν θηρίων.
ἐσθίειν δὲ λάβρως ἢ πίνειν χανδὸν οὐ συγχωροῦμαι· δεῖ γὰρ οἶμαι προσέχειν,
μὴ λάθω συγκαταφαγὼν(682) τὰς τρίχας τοῖς ἄρτοις. [D] ὑπὲρ δὲ τοῦ
φιλεῖσθαι καὶ φιλεῖν ἥκιστα ἀλγῶ. καίτοι καὶ τοῦτο ἔχειν ἔοικεν ὁ πώγων
ὥσπερ τὰ ἄλλα λυπηρόν, οὐκ ἐπιτρέπων καθαρὰ λείοις καὶ διὰ τοῦτο οἶμαι
γλυκερώτερα χείλεσι χείλη προσμάττειν, ὅπερ ἤδη τις ἔφη τῶν ἐργασαμένων
ξὺν τῷ Πανὶ καὶ τῇ Καλλιόπῃ εἰς τὸν Δάφνιν ποιήματα. ὑμεῖς δέ φατε δεῖν
καὶ σχοινία πλέκειν ἐνθένδε· καὶ ἕτοιμος παρέχειν, ἢν μόνον ἕλκειν
δυνηθῆτε καὶ μὴ τὰς ἀτρίπτους ὑμῶν καὶ μαλακὰς χεῖρας ἡ τραχύτης αὐτῶν
δεινὰ ἐργάσηται. νομίσηι δὲ μηδεὶς δυσχεραίνειν ἐμὲ τῷ σκώμματι. [339]
δίδωμι γὰρ αὐτὸς τὴν αἰτίαν ὥσπερ οἱ τράγοι τὸ γένειον ἔχων, ἐξὸν οἶμαι
λεῖον αὐτὸ ποιεῖν καὶ ψιλόν, ὁποῖον οἱ καλοὶ τῶν παίδων ἔχουσιν ἅπασαί τε
αἱ γυναῖκες, αἷς φύσει πρόσεστι τὸ ἐράσμιον. ὑμεῖς δὲ καὶ ἐν τῷ γήρᾳ
ζηλοῦντες τοὺς ὑμῶν αὐτῶν υἱέας καὶ τὰς θυγατέρας ὑπὸ ἁβρότητος βίου καὶ
ἴσως ἁπαλότητος τρόπου λεῖον ἐπιμελῶς ἐργάζεσθε, τὸν ἄνδρα ὑποφαίνοντες
[B] καὶ παραδεικνύντες διὰ τοῦ μετώπου καὶ οὐχ ὥσπερ ἡμεῖς ἐκ τῶν γνάθων.
(However the song that I now sing has been composed in prose, and it
contains much violent abuse, directed not, by Zeus, against others—how
could it be, since the law forbids?—but against the poet and author
himself. For there is no law to prevent one’s writing either praise or
criticism of oneself. Now as for praising myself, though I should be very
glad to do so, I have no reason for that; but for criticising myself I
have countless reasons, and first I will begin with my face. For though
nature did not make this any too handsome or well‐favoured or give it the
bloom of youth, I myself out of sheer perversity and ill‐temper have added
to it this long beard of mine, to punish it, as it would seem, for this
very crime of not being handsome by nature. For the same reason I put up
with the lice that scamper about in it as though it were a thicket for
wild beasts. As for eating greedily or drinking with my mouth wide open,
it is not in my power; for I must take care, I suppose, or before I know
it I shall eat up some of my own hairs along with my crumbs of bread. In
the matter of being kissed and kissing I suffer no inconvenience whatever.
And yet for this as for other purposes a beard is evidently troublesome,
since it does not allow one to press shaven “lips to other lips more
sweetly”—because they are smooth, I suppose—as has been said already by
one of those who with the aid of Pan and Calliope composed poems in honour
of Daphnis.(683) But you say that I ought to twist ropes from it! Well I
am willing to provide you with ropes if only you have the strength to pull
them and their roughness does not do dreadful damage to your “unworn and
tender hands.”(684) And let no one suppose that I am offended by your
satire. For I myself furnish you with an excuse for it by wearing my chin
as goats do, when I might, I suppose, make it smooth and bare as handsome
youths wear theirs, and all women, who are endowed by nature with
loveliness. But you, since even in your old age you emulate your own sons
and daughters by your soft and delicate way of living, or perhaps by your
effeminate dispositions, carefully make your chins smooth, and your
manhood you barely reveal and slightly indicate by your foreheads, not by
your jaws as I do.)
Ἐμοὶ δὲ οὐκ ἀπέχρησε μόνον ἡ βαθύτης τοῦ γενείου, ἀλλὰ καὶ τῇ κεφαλῇ
πρόσεστιν αὐχμός, καὶ ὀλιγάκις κείρομαι καὶ ὀνυχίζομαι, καὶ τοὺς δακτύλους
ὑπὸ τοῦ καλάμου τὰ πολλὰ ἔχω μέλανας. εἰ δὲ βούλεσθέ τι καὶ τῶν ἀπορρήτων
μαθεῖν, ἔστι μοι τὸ στῆθος δασὺ καὶ λάσιον ὥσπερ τῶν λεόντων, οἵπερ
βασιλεύουσι τῶν θηρίων, οὐδὲ ἐποίησα λεῖον αὐτὸ πώποτε διὰ δυσκολίαν καὶ
μικροπρέπειαν, [C] οὐδὲ ἄλλο τι μέρος τοῦ σώματος εἰργασάμην λεῖον οὐδὲ
μαλακόν. εἶπον γ᾽ ἂν ὑμῖν, εἴ τις ἦν μοι καὶ ἀκροχορδὼν ὥσπερ τῷ
Κικέρωνι·(685) νυνὶ δ᾽ οὐκ ἔστι. καὶ εἰ(686) συγγινώσκετε, φράσω ὑμῖν
καὶ(687) ἕτερον. ἐμοὶ γὰρ οὐκ ἀπόχρῃ τὸ σῶμα εἶναι τοιοῦτο, πρὸς δὲ καὶ
δίαιτα παγχάλεπος ἐπιτηδεύεται. εἴργω τῶν θεάτρων ἐμαυτὸν ὑπ᾽ ἀβελτηρίας,
οὐδ᾽ εἴσω τῆς αὐλῆς παραδέχομαι τὴν θυμέλην ἔξω τῆς νουμηνίας τοῦ ἔτους
ὑπ᾽ ἀναισθησίας, [D] ὥσπερ τινὰ φόρον ἢ δασμὸν εἰσφέρων καὶ ἀποδιδοὺς
ἄγροικος ὀλίγα ἔχων οὐκ ἐπιεικεῖ δεσπότῃ. καὶ τότε δὲ εἰσελθὼν τοῖς
ἀφοσιουμένοις ἔοικα. κέκτημαι δὲ οὐδένα, καὶ ταῦτα βασιλεὺς ἀκούων μέγας,
ὃς καθάπερ ὕπαρχος ἢ στρατηγὸς διὰ πάσης τῆς οἰκουμένης ἄρξει τῶν μίμων
καὶ τῶν ἡνιόχων· ὅπερ ὑμεῖς ὁρῶντες ὀλίγῳ πρότερον
(But as though the mere length of my beard were not enough, my head is
dishevelled besides, and I seldom have my hair cut or my nails, while my
fingers are nearly always black from using a pen. And if you would like to
learn something that is usually a secret, my breast is shaggy, and covered
with hair, like the breasts of lions who among wild beasts are monarchs
like me, and I have never in my life made it smooth, so ill‐conditioned
and shabby am I nor have I made any other part of my body smooth or soft.
If I had a wart like Cicero,(688) I would tell you so; but as it happens I
have none. And by your leave I will tell you something else. I am not
content with having my body in this rough condition, but in addition the
mode of life that I practise is very strict indeed. I banish myself from
the theatres, such a dolt am I, and I do not admit the thymele(689) within
my court except on the first day of the year, because I am too stupid to
appreciate it; like some country fellow who from his small means has to
pay a tax or render tribute to a harsh master. And even when I do enter
the theatre I look like a man who is expiating a crime. Then again, though
I am entitled a mighty Emperor, I employ no one to govern the mimes and
chariot‐drivers as my lieutenant or general throughout the inhabited
world. And observing this recently,)
ἀναμιμνήσκεσθε νῦν
ἥβης ἐκείνης νοῦ τ᾽ ἐκείνου καὶ φρενῶν.(690)
(“You now recall that youth of his, his wit and wisdom.”(691))
[340] Ἦν μὲν οὖν ἴσως καὶ τοῦτο βαρὺ καὶ δεῖγμα ἐναργὲς μοχθηρίας τρόπου·
προστίθημι δὲ ἐγώ τι καινότερον ἀεί· μισῶ τὰς ἱπποδρομίας, ὥσπερ οἱ
χρήματα ὠφληκότες τὰς ἀγοράς. ὀλιγάκις οὖν εἰς αὐτὰς φοιτῶ ἐν ταῖς ἑορταῖς
τῶν θεῶν οὐδὲ διημερεύω, καθάπερ εἰώθεσαν ὅ τε ἀνεψιὸς ὁ ἐμὸς καὶ ὁ θεῖος
καὶ ὁ ἀδελφὸς ὁ ὁμοπάτριος. ἓξ δὲ τοὺς πάντας θεώμενος δρόμους, οὐδ᾽
αὐτοὺς ὡς ἄν τις ἐρῶν [B] τοῦ πράγματος ἢ ναὶ μὰ Δία μὴ μισῶν αὐτὸ μηδὲ
ἀποστρεφόμενος, ἄσμενος ἀπαλλάττομαι.
(Perhaps you had this other grievance and clear proof of the worthlessness
of my disposition—for I keep on adding some still more strange
characteristic—I mean that I hate horse‐races as men who owe money hate
the market‐place. Therefore I seldom attend them, only during the
festivals of the gods; and I do not stay the whole day as my cousin(692)
used to do, and my uncle(693) and my brother and my father’s son.(694) Six
races are all that I stay to see, and not even those with the air of one
who loves the sport, or even, by Zeus, with the air of one who does not
hate and loathe it, and I am glad to get away.)
Ἀλλὰ τὰ μὲν ἔξω ταῦτα· καίτοι πόστον εἴρηταί μοι μέρος τῶν ἐμῶν εἰς ὑμᾶς
ἀδικημάτων; τὰ δὲ ἔνδον ἄγρυπνοι νύκτες ἐν στιβάδι, καὶ τροφὴ παντὸς ἥττων
κόρου πικρὸν ἦθος ποιεῖ καὶ τρυφώσῃ πόλει πολέμιον. οὐ μὴν ὑμῶν· γ᾽ ἕνεκα
τοῦτο ἐπιτηδεύεται παρ᾽ ἐμοῦ· δεινὴ δέ τις ἐκ παιδαρίου με καὶ ἀνόητος
ἀπάτη καταλαβοῦσα τῇ γαστρὶ πολεμεῖν ἔπεισεν, οὐδὲ ἐπιτρέπω [C] πολλῶν
ἐμπίμπλασθαι σιτίων αὐτῇ. ὀλιγιστάκις(695) οὖν ἐμοὶ τῶν πάντων ἐμέσαι
συνέβη. καὶ μέμνημαι αὐτὸ παθὼν ἐξ ὅτου καῖσαρ ἐγενόμην ἅπαξ ἀπὸ
συμπτώματος, οὐ πλησμονῆς. ἄξιον δὲ ὑπομνησθῆναι διηγήματος οὐδὲ αὐτοῦ
πάνυ χαρίεντος, ἐμοὶ δὲ διὰ τοῦτο μάλιστα οἰκείου.
(But all these things are externals; and indeed what a small fraction of
my offences against you have I described! But to turn to my private life
within the court. Sleepless nights on a pallet and a diet that is anything
rather than surfeiting make my temper harsh and unfriendly to a luxurious
city like yours. However it is not in order to set an example to you that
I adopt these habits. But in my childhood a strange and senseless delusion
came over me and persuaded me to war against my belly, so that I do not
allow it to fill itself with a great quantity of food. Thus it has
happened to me most rarely of all men to vomit my food. And though I
remember having this experience once, after I became Caesar, it was by
accident and was not due to over‐eating. It may be worth while to tell the
story which is not in itself very graceful, but for that very reason is
especially suited to me.)
[D] Ἐτύγχανον ἐγὼ χειμάζων περὶ τὴν φίλην Λουκετίαν· ὀνομάζουσι δ᾽ οὕτως
οἱ Κελτοὶ τῶν Παρισίων τὴν πολίχνην· ἔστι δ᾽ οὐ μεγάλη νῆσος ἐγκειμένη τῷ
ποταμῷ, καὶ αὐτὴν κύκλῳ πᾶσαν τεῖχος περιλαμβάνει,(696) ξύλιναι δ᾽ ἐπ᾽
αὐτὴν ἀμφοτέρωθεν εἰσάγουσι γέφυραι, καὶ ὀλιγάκις ὁ ποταμὸς ἐλαττοῦται καὶ
μείζων γένεται, τὰ πολλὰ δ᾽ ἔστιν ὁποῖος ὥρᾳ θέρους καὶ χειμῶνος, ὕδωρ
ἥδιστον καὶ καθαρώτατον ὁρᾶν καὶ πίνειν ἐθέλοντι παρέχων. ἅτε γὰρ νῆσον
οἰκοῦντας ὑδρεύεσθαι μάλιστα ἐνθένδε χρή. γίνεται δὲ [341] καὶ ὁ χειμὼν
ἐκεῖ πρᾳότερος εἴτε ὑπὸ τῆς θέρμης τοῦ ὠκεανοῦ· στάδια γὰρ ἀπέχει τῶν
ἐννακοσίων οὐ πλείω, καὶ διαδίδοται τυχὸν λεπτή τις αὔρα τοῦ ὕδατος, εἶναι
δὲ δοκεῖ θερμότερον τὸ θαλάττιον τοῦ γλυκέος· εἴτε οὖν ἐκ ταύτης εἴτε ἐκ
τινος ἄλλης αἰτίας ἀφανοῦς ἐμοί, τὸ πρᾶγμα ἐστι τοιοῦτον, ἀλεεινότερον
ἔχουσιν οἱ τὸ χωρίον οἰκοῦντες τὸν χειμῶνα, καὶ φύεται παρ᾽ αὐτοῖς ἄμπελος
ἀγαθή, καὶ συκᾶς ἤδη εἰσιν οἳ(697) ἐμηχανήσαντο, σκεπάζοντες [B] αὐτὰς τοῦ
χειμῶνος ὥσπερ ἱματίοις τῇ καλάμῃ τοῦ πυροῦ καὶ τοιούτοις τισίν, ὅσα
εἴωθεν εἴργειν τὴν ἐκ τοῦ ἀέρος ἐπιγιγνομένην τοῖς δένδροις βλάβην.
ἐγένετο δὴ οὖν ὁ χειμὼν τοῦ εἰωθότος σφοδρότερος, καὶ παρέφερεν ὁ ποταμὸς
ὥσπερ μαρμάρου πλάκας· ἴστε δήπου τὸν Φρύγιον λίθον τὸν λευκόν· τούτῳ
ἐῴκει μάλιστα τὰ κρύσταλλα,(698) μεγάλα καὶ ἐπάλληλα φερόμενα· καὶ δὴ καὶ
συνεχῆ ποιεῖν ἤδη τὸν πόρον ἔμελλε [C] καὶ τὸ ῥεῦμα γεφυροῦν. ὡς οὖν ἐν
τούτοις ἀγριώτερος ἦν τοῦ συνήθους, ἐθάλπετο δὲ τὸ δωμάτιον οὐδαμῶς, οὗπερ
ἐκάθευδον, ὅνπερ εἰώθει τρόπον ὑπογαίοις(699) καμίνοις τὰ πολλὰ τῶν
οἰκημάτων ἐκεῖ θερμαίνεσθαι, καὶ ταῦτα ἔχον εὐτρεπῶς πρὸς τὸ παραδέξασθαι
τὴν ἐκ τοῦ πυρὸς ἀλέαν· συνέβη δ᾽ οἶμαι καῖ τότε διὰ σκαιότητα τὴν ἐμὴν
καὶ τὴν εἰς ἐμαυτὸν πρῶτον, ὡς εἰκός, ἀπανθρωπίαν· ἐβουλόμην γὰρ ἐθίζειν
ἐμαυτὸν ἀνέχεσθαι τὸν ἀέρα ταύτης ἀνενδεῶς ἔχοντα τῆς βοηθείας. ὡς δὲ ὁ
χειμὼν ἐπεκράτει καὶ ἀεὶ μείζων ἐπεγίνετο, [D] θερμῆναι μὲν οὐδ᾽ ὣς
ἐπέτρεψα τοῖς ὑπηρέταις τὸ οἴκημα, δεδιὼς κινῆσαι τὴν ἐν τοῖς τοίχοις
ὑγρότητα, κομίσαι δ᾽ ἔνδον ἐκέλευσα πῦρ κεκαυμένον καὶ ἄνθρακας λαμπροὺς
ἀποθέσθαι παντελῶς μετρίους. οἱ δὲ καίπερ ὄντες οὐ πολλοὶ παμπληθεῖς ἀπὸ
τῶν τοίχων ἀτμοὺς ἐκίνησαν, ὑφ᾽ ὧν κατέδαρθον. ἐμπιμπλαμένης δέ μοι τῆς
κεφαλῆς ἐδέησα μὲν ἀποπνιγῆναι, [342] κομισθεὶς δ᾽ ἔξω, τῶν ἰατρῶν
παραινούντων ἀπορρῖψαι τὴν ἐντεθεῖσαν ἄρτι τροφήν, οὔτι μὰ Δία πολλὴν
οὖσαν, ἐξέβαλον, καὶ ἐγενόμην αὐτίκα ῥᾴων, ὥστε μοι γενέσθαι κουφοτέραν
τὴν νύκτα καὶ τῆς ὑστεραίας πράττειν ὄ,τιπερ ἐθέλοιμι.
(I happened to be in winter quarters at my beloved Lutetia—for that is how
the Celts call the capital of the Parisians. It is a small island lying in
the river; a wall entirely surrounds it, and wooden bridges lead to it on
both sides. The river seldom rises and falls, but usually is the same
depth in the winter as in the summer season, and it provides water which
is very clear to the eye and very pleasant for one who wishes to drink.
For since the inhabitants live on an island they have to draw their water
chiefly from the river. The winter too is rather mild there, perhaps from
the warmth of the ocean, which is not more than nine hundred stades
distant, and it may be that a slight breeze from the water is wafted so
far; for sea water seems to be warmer than fresh. Whether from this or
from some other cause obscure to me, the fact is as I say, that those who
live in that place have a warmer winter. And a good kind of vine grows
thereabouts, and some persons have even managed to make fig‐trees grow by
covering them in winter with a sort of garment of wheat straw and with
things of that sort, such as are used to protect trees from the harm that
is done them by the cold wind. As I was saying then, the winter was more
severe than usual, and the river kept bringing down blocks like marble.
You know, I suppose, the white stone that comes from Phrygia; the blocks
of ice were very like it, of great size, and drifted down one after
another; in fact it seemed likely that they would make an unbroken path
and bridge the stream. The winter then was more inclement than usual, but
the room where I slept was not warmed in the way that most houses are
heated, I mean by furnaces underground; and that too though it was
conveniently arranged for letting in heat from such a fire. But it so
happened I suppose, because I was awkward then as now, and displayed
inhumanity first of all, as was natural, towards myself. For I wished to
accustom myself to bear the cold air without needing this aid. And though
the winter weather prevailed and continually increased in severity, even
so I did not allow my servants to heat the house, because I was afraid of
drawing out the dampness in the walls; but I ordered them to carry in fire
that had burned down and to place in the room a very moderate number of
hot coals. But the coals, though there were not very many of them, brought
out from the walls quantities of steam and this made me fall asleep. And
since my head was filled with the fumes I was almost choked. Then I was
carried outside, and since the doctors advised me to throw up the food I
had just swallowed,—and it was little enough, by Zeus—, I vomited it and
at once became easier, so that I had a more comfortable night, and next
day could do whatever I pleased.)
Οὕτω μὲν οὖν ἐγὼ καὶ ἐν Κελτοῖς κατὰ τὸν τοῦ Μενάνδρου Δύσκολον αὐτὸς
ἐμαυτῷ πόνους προσετίθην. ἀλλ᾽ ἡ Κελτῶν μὲν ταῦτα ῥᾷον ἔφερεν ἀγροικία,
πόλις δ᾽ εὐδαίμων καὶ μακαρία καὶ πολυάνθρωπος εἰκότως ἄχθεται, [B] ἐν ᾗ
πολλοὶ μὲν ὀρχησταί, πολλοὶ δ᾽ αὐληταί, μῖμοι δὲ πλείους τῶν πολιτῶν,
αἰδὼς δ᾽ οὐκ ἔστιν ἀρχόντων. ἐρυθριᾶν γὰρ πρέπει τοῖς ἀνάνδροις, ἐπεὶ τοῖς
γε ἀνδρείοις, ὥσπερ ὑμεῖς, ἕωθεν κωμάζειν, νύκτωρ ἡδυπαθεῖν, ὅτι τῶν νόμων
ὑπερορᾶτε μὴ λόγῳ διδάσκειν, ἀλλὰ τοῖς ἔργοις ἐνδείκνυσθαι. καὶ γὰρ οἱ
νόμοι φοβεροὶ διὰ τοὺς ἄρχοντας· ὥστε ὅστις ἄρχοντα ὕβρισεν οὗτος ἐκ
περιουσίας τοὺς νόμους κατεπάτησεν· [C] ὡς δ᾽ ἐπὶ τούτοις εὐφραινόμενοι
δῆλον ποιεῖτε πολλαχοῦ μέν, οὐχ ἥκιστα δ᾽ ἐν ταῖς ἀγοραῖς καὶ ἐν τοῖς
θεάτροις, ἀπὸ μὲν τῶν κρότων καὶ ἀπὸ τῆς βοῆς ὁ δῆμος, οἱ δ᾽ ἐν τέλει τῷ
γνωριμώτεροι μᾶλλον εἶναι καὶ ὀνομάζεσθαι παρὰ πᾶσιν ἀφ᾽ ὧν εἰς τὰς
τοιαύτας ἑορτὰς ἐδαπάνησαν ἢ Σόλων ὁ Ἀθηναῖος ἀπὸ τῆς πρὸς Κροῖσον τὸν
Λυδῶν βασιλέα συνουσίας. καλοὶ δὲ πάντες καὶ μεγάλοι καὶ λεῖοι καὶ
ἀγένειοι, [D] νέοι τε ὁμοίως καὶ πρεσβύτεροι ζηλωταὶ τῆς εὐδαιμονίας τῶν
Φαιάκων,
(After this fashion then, even when I was among the Celts, like the ill‐
tempered man in Menander,(700) “I myself kept heaping troubles on my own
head.” But whereas the boorish Celts used easily to put up with these ways
of mine, they are naturally resented by a prosperous and gay and crowded
city in which there are numerous dancers and flute players and more mimes
than ordinary citizens, and no respect at all for those who govern. For
the blush of modesty befits the unmanly, but manly fellows like you it
befits to begin your revels at dawn, to spend your nights in pleasure, and
to show not only by your words but by your deeds also that you despise the
laws. For indeed it is only by means of those in authority that the laws
inspire fear in men; so that he who insults one who is in authority, over
and above this tramples on the laws. And that you take pleasure in this
sort of behaviour you show clearly on many occasions, but especially in
the market‐places and theatres; the mass of the people by their clapping
and shouting, while those in office show it by the fact that, on account
of the sums they have spent on such entertainments, they are more widely
known and more talked about by all men than Solon the Athenian ever was on
account of his interview with Croesus the king of the Lydians.(701) And
all of you are handsome and tall and smooth‐skinned and beardless; for
young and old alike you are emulous of the happiness of the Phaeacians,
and rather than righteousness you prefer)
Εἵματα τ᾽ ἐξημοιβὰ λοετρά τε θερμὰ καὶ εὐνὰς
(“changes of raiment and warm baths and beds.”(702))
ἀντὶ τῆς ὁσίας ἀποδεχόμενοι.