Then, frustrated with fury, he thundered at me successively: "Have you
a towing permit? Have you a dog licence? Can you produce a boot and
shoe grant? Do you hold any rubber shares? Have you been inoculated
for premature decay? What did you do in the Great War?"
I gave him the necessary documents in perfect order. For a moment
he was nonplussed. Then he asked with sly intention, "Have you
the champagne and chicken sandwich ration which is apportioned to
super-inspectors?"
I handed it to him with a table-napkin (unused) and a pair of
wire-cutters thrown in. For some minutes he remained silent, except in
the gustatory sense, then he turned upon me and, handing back an empty
bottle, said triumphantly, "You must now produce, under Clause 5005
Gerrard, framed this morning at 11-30 o'clock, one pint of old ale
and six ounces of bread and cheese for the sustentation of the
sub-inspector."
I regarded him stonily and leant against the cold, cold bonnet of the
car. Alas! I had it not.
"Sir," I pleaded, "I did not know ... give me time. The next inn is
but a few miles. If you and your companion will take a seat I will
bring you to the inn door and all will be well."
He laughed in my face.
"Algernon Brocklebank Smith," he said sternly, "you have betrayed
yourself into our hands." He turned to his myrmidon: "Get a move on
you, Herbert; it's a bit parky standing about here."
After all he was but a coarse fellow.
Herbert, galvanised into action, produced a small oblong object from
his pocket, lighted the end of it with the glowing butt of one of my
Corona Coronas, and placed it underneath the car. In a few moments all
that remained of my three-thousand-guinea ten--cylinder twelve-seater
was one small nut, which was immediately impounded.
I raised the collar of my overcoat (second reef), shifted my face to
the eastward, and, notwithstanding the blister on my heel, turned my
steps towards my destination.