THE PASSING OF THE OLD ORDER
HIGH POLITICS
Transition and growth, change and decay and reconstruction marked the
half-century covered in the previous three volumes. In the twenty-two
years that divide the return of the Liberals in 1892 from the "Grand
Smash" (as Mr. Page has called it) of 1914, these features are
intensified to an extent that renders the task of attempting even a
superficial survey perilous and intractable to one who is neither a
philosopher nor a trained historian. The wisest and sanest of those who
have lived through these wonderful times are too near their heights
and depths to view them in true perspective. Whatever merit attaches
to this chronicle is due to its reliance on contemporary opinion as
expressed in the pages of an organ of independent middle-class views.
It is within these limits a history of Victorians and post-Victorians
written by themselves.
"Full closes," unfashionable in modern music, are generally artificial
in histories. But the period on which we now enter did more than merely
coincide with the end of one century and the beginning of another.
It marked the passing of the Old Order, the passing of the Victorian
age: of the Queen, who, alike in her virtues and limitations, in the
strength and narrowness of her personality, epitomized most of its
qualities; and of the type of Elder Statesmen, of whom, with the sole
exception of Mr. Balfour, none remains at the moment as an active
force in the political arena. Of the Ministry of 1892-5 the only
survivor who mixes in practical politics is Mr. Asquith, but his record
as a legislator hardly entitles him to the name of an Elder Statesman
in the Victorian sense. Sir George Trevelyan, Lord Morley, Lord
Eversley and Lord Rosebery have all retired into seclusion. So, too,
with the Unionist Ministers who held office from 1895 to 1905. Veterans
such as Lord Chaplin, Lord George Hamilton and Lord Lansdowne enjoy
respect, but they do not sway public opinion, and are debarred by age
from active leadership and office. Lord Midleton stood aside to make
way for younger men when the Coalition Government was formed, and Lord
Selborne is perhaps the only Conservative statesman who held office
before 1906 who has any chance of sitting in a future Cabinet.
It was not only an age of endings; it was also an age of beginnings,
fresh and sometimes false starts, both as regards men and measures.
It witnessed the coming of the Death Duties in 1894, when Sir William
Harcourt's "Radical Budget," by equalizing the charges on real and
personal property, paved the way for the more drastic legislation
introduced by the Liberals in 1906 and the following years. This was
Harcourt's greatest achievement, and perhaps the most notable effort
in constructive policy of the short-lived Liberal administration; for
the second Home Rule Bill was dropped on its rejection by the Peers.
Under the Unionist administrations of 1895-1905 Mr. Joseph Chamberlain,
as Colonial Secretary, and Mr. Wyndham, by his Irish Land Purchase
Act, rendered conspicuous service in the domain of Imperial and Home
policy. Yet at the culminating point of his popularity Mr. Chamberlain
left the Government to prosecute that Fiscal Campaign which broke up
the Government, broke down his strength, and ended a brilliant career
in enforced retirement. Mr. Wyndham's withdrawal from the Government,
owing to friction over Irish policy, closed in early middle age the
career of the most gifted and attractive politician of his generation.
[Illustration: "IL GIOCONDO"
The enigmatic smile of this Old Master distinguishes it from that other
National treasure, the "Bonar Lisa."]
From 1906 onwards we are confronted by the meteoric and Protean
personalities of Mr. Lloyd George and Mr. Winston Churchill, who
between them have held almost all the great offices of State, and
ranged over the whole spectrum of Party colours, and lastly of Lord
Birkenhead. Mr. Churchill's father had once called Mr. Gladstone "an
old man in a hurry." One wonders what Lord Randolph would have called
his son Winston, of whom it was said "he likes things to happen, and
when they don't happen he likes to make them happen." In comparison
with the discreet progress of Reform in the last century the pace
became fast and furious. The demands of organized Labour were conceded
in the Trade Disputes Bill of 1906--the greatest landmark in industrial
legislation of the last half-century--and in 1910 the People's Budget
led to the revolt and surrender of the House of Lords.
Yet concurrently with the democratic drift of Liberal finance and
social reform, the principle of a continuity of foreign policy,
initiated by Lord Rosebery, and continued by Lord Salisbury and Lord
Lansdowne, was faithfully maintained by Sir Edward Grey, whose sober
and frugal expositions contrasted strangely with the vivacity and
flamboyant rhetoric of his colleagues. The Anglo-French _Entente_ and
the Anglo-Japanese Alliance both came into being when Lord Lansdowne
was at the Foreign Office, and the influence of the Liberal Imperialist
group in Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman's Cabinet secured a free hand for
the Foreign Minister. It is the fashion in some quarters to regard the
late King Edward as "the only begetter" of the _Entente_; it is at any
rate within the mark to credit him with having missed no opportunity of
fostering it by his tact and _bonhomie_. It was no easy task. When he
visited Paris in 1902 the official greetings were perfectly correct,
but the animosity aroused over the Boer war found vent in outrageous
and unseemly caricatures. England was then the most unpopular country
in the world; and in allaying this general distrust and dislike, the
personal relations of King Edward with foreign statesmen and rulers
wrought powerfully for goodwill and a better understanding.
[Illustration: STUDENTS ON THE MAKE
MR. F. E. SMITH: "Master of epigram--like me!"
MR. WINSTON CHURCHILL: "Wrote a novel in his youth--like me!"
TOGETHER: "Travelled in the East--like us. How does it end?"
(Mr. W. F. Monypenny's official "Life of Disraeli" has just been
published.)]
[Sidenote: _Foes and Friends_]
Looking back, in the light of fuller knowledge, on the South African
war of 1899-1902, we cannot fail to recognize how narrowly we escaped
the active hostility of more than one European Power; how much we owe
to the wise magnanimity of the British Government in granting full
autonomy to the Transvaal in 1906--an act not only justified by the
sequel but approved by those who voted against it. It converted the
most formidable of those who fought against us into loyal servants of
the Empire in her hour of greatest need; it allayed the misgivings
of those at home who had opposed the Boer war, and it silenced the
criticisms of foreigners who had denounced our aim as the extermination
of a people rightly struggling to be free. Whatever views may be held
as to the origin of the Boer war--that it was forced on by mining
magnates, or that it was the inevitable result of a reactionary system
which threatened our hold on South Africa--it remains one of the very
few examples of a war which, in the long run, left things better than
they had been, and satisfied the aspirations of the majority of the
conquered. And if we did not learn all the lessons that we might have
learned from the military point of view, the experience was not thrown
away. The services of Kitchener, Plumer and Byng, to mention only three
out of scores of names, proved that what was comparatively a little war
was a true school of leadership for the greatest of all.
Great Britain's warlike operations throughout this period were
intra-Imperial, and the scale of the South African campaign, in which
from first to last we put 250,000 men into the field, dwarfed the
troubles in Ashanti and on the Indian frontier into insignificance.
That we kept out of all the other wars which convulsed the world
between 1892 and 1914 must be put down to good management as well as
good luck. It is remarkable to notice the steady if gradual convergence
of the war clouds on Europe, the drawing in of the war zone from the
circumference to the centre, beginning with the conflict between China
and Japan. The brief and inglorious Greco-Turkish war hardly counts,
and Europe was not physically engaged in the Spanish-American war,
where all the fighting was done in the New World. Politically its
significance was far-reaching, as revising the Monroe Doctrine and
enlarging the Imperial horizons of the United States. Politically,
again, the "Boxer" rising in China affected the European Powers, whose
competing interests in the "integrity of China" were not reconciled by
their joint expedition for the relief of the Legations in 1900. Here
again the fighting was in the Far East, as it was in the Russo-Japanese
war, if we except the "regrettable incident" of the Dogger Bank; and
Russia has always been as much an Oriental as a Western Power. But the
Russo-Japanese war shook Tsardom to its foundations, promoted Japan
to the status of a Great Power, and compensated her largely for the
intervention of Russia, Germany and France in robbing her of the spoils
of her victory over China. The European conflagration broke out in
1912 with the war of the Balkan League on Turkey. Victory crowned the
efforts of a righteous cause--the relief of oppressed nationalities
from the oppressions and exactions of a corrupt and tyrannous rule--but
was wasted by the internecine quarrels and irreconcilable demands of
the victors. Serbia, who had lived down much of the odium excited by
the barbarous murders of Alexander and Draga, and had borne more than
her share of the war against Turkey, was isolated, partly by her own
intransigence, mainly by the greed, the diplomatic manoeuvres and
the treachery of her allies, and in her isolation fell a victim to the
dynastic ambitions of Austria. The assassination of the Crown Prince
Ferdinand at Sarajevo was the excuse for Austria's ultimatum to Serbia,
the proximate cause of the Great War of 1914. Whether engineered
in Vienna or not, the murder secured the removal of an heir whose
succession to the throne of Austria-Hungary was looked upon with grave
suspicion by a powerful group in Austria who had no desire to upset the
House of Hapsburg but profoundly distrusted the Crown Prince. In the
homely phrase Sarajevo killed two birds with one stone. It eliminated
an uncertain and unpopular prince, and furnished Austria with an
opportunity for gratifying her long-standing hostility to Serbia. But
there was a third and bigger bird; for the complicity of Germany in
dispatching the Ultimatum is no matter for surmise. Without her support
and pressure it would never have been sent.
[Illustration: THE ROAD TO RUIN]
[Sidenote: _Punch on World Politics_]
Confronted on all sides by problems of such magnitude and far-reaching
importance, it is not to be wondered at if _Punch_--primarily a comic
journal--failed to gauge their full significance, or to preserve an
attitude of inflexible consistency in his comments. There was always
a certain divergence between his editorial policy as expressed in the
cartoons and the comments of individual members of his staff. This
elasticity made for impartiality in the main; but it became somewhat
perplexing at the time of the Boer war, when a general support of
the Government was combined with very sharp criticism of Lord Milner.
Yet if _Punch_ here and elsewhere spoke with more than one voice, his
views on high policy, international relations and home affairs exhibit
a certain general uniformity and continuity. He supported both the
_Entente_ and the alliance with Japan. The spasm of irritation over the
Fashoda incident soon passed; he resented the intervention of Russia
and Germany which robbed Japan of the fruits of her victory over China,
and his sympathies were unmistakably with Japan in the war with Russia.
_Punch_ was consistently and increasingly critical of the Kaiser, while
perhaps over-ready to dissociate his temper from that not only of the
German people but of the educated classes; he was also consistently
alive to the menace of German competition in naval armaments and trade,
though by no means disposed to acquit British merchants and workmen
from a provocative lethargy. Towards America, _Punch's_ attitude
shows a progressive benevolence. The Venezuela incident and President
Cleveland's message at the beginning of this period brought us within
measurable distance of a rupture, happily averted by negotiation, as
the later and less serious difficulty over the Alaska boundary was
averted by arbitration. One may fairly say that _Punch's_ relief at
the pacific adjustment of these outstanding questions was far greater
than his sensitiveness on the point of national honour. He did not
refrain from the use of the word "filibustering" in connexion with
the Spanish-American war, in which the gallantry of Cervera went far
to enlist sympathy on the beaten side; but with the accession to the
Presidency of Mr. Roosevelt, a man in many ways after _Punch's_ own
heart, though not exempt from criticism for his controversial methods,
a friendlier tone became apparent, and the historic "indiscretion" of
Admiral Sims's speech at the Guildhall in 1910 helped to create the
atmosphere of goodwill which rendered possible the fulfilment of his
prophecy.
On National Defence and the maintenance of our naval supremacy _Punch_
continued to speak with no uncertain voice. He applauded Lord Roberts's
patriotic but neglected warnings and his advocacy of universal military
service, and lent a friendly but not uncritical approval to the
Territorial Army scheme.
[Illustration: THE ONLY ALTERNATIVE
JOHN BULL: "Recruits coming in nicely, Sergeant?"
RECRUITING SERGEANT PUNCH: "No, Sir. The fact is, Mr. Bull, if
you can't make it better worth their while to enlist, you'll have to
shoulder a rifle yourself!"]
[Sidenote: _Gladstonian Home Rule_]
In regard to Ireland and Home Rule, after the rejection of the Home
Rule Bill of 1893 _Punch's_ independent support of the Liberals gave
place to a general support of the Unionist policy, tempered by a more
or less critical attitude towards Ulster. He cannot be blamed for
neglecting to note the obscure and academic beginnings of the Sinn Fein
movement, or for failing to forecast that triple alliance of Sinn Fein
with the old physical force party and the Labour extremists under
Larkin which led to the rebellion of Easter, 1916. The Government
expert, who devoted seven years to the neglect of his duties, was
sunk in unholy ignorance of all that was going on until the explosion
took place. For the rest, _Punch_ became increasingly critical of
the demands of Labour and the parochial outlook of its leaders;
increasingly antagonistic to the measures passed in satisfaction of
those demands. At the same time he devoted more space than ever to
satirizing, ridiculing, and castigating the excesses, extravagances
and eccentricities of "smart" society, the week-end pleasure hunt of
the idle rich, and all the other features which may be summed up in
the phrase, "England de Luxe." Pictorially his record reveals perhaps
more amusement than disgust at the carnival of frivolity which reached
its climax in the years before the war. The note of misgiving is not
lacking, but it is sounded less vehemently than in the 'eighties of the
last century. In the main _Punch's_ temper may be expressed, to borrow
from Bagehot, as an "animated moderation."
To turn from outlines to details, one is confronted in 1893 with Mr.
Gladstone's second attempt to solve a problem which Giraldus Cambrensis
pronounced insoluble seven centuries ago. _Punch's_ earlier cartoons
on the Home Rule Bill are negligible, but the difficulties of the
Premier's position are aptly shown in the picture of Gladstone as a
knight in armour on a perilous pathway between the Irish Nationalist
bog and the "last ditch" of Ulster. The accompanying text, modelled
on Bunyan, represents Mr. Gladstone as a Pilgrim relying as much on
tactics as the sword. The most genial reference to Ulster is that in
which she figures as the Widow Wadman asking Uncle Toby, "Now, Mr.
Bull, do you see any 'green' in my eye?" and Uncle Toby protests he
"can see nothing whatever of the sort." Otherwise _Punch's_ attitude is
unsympathetic, witness the use of the term "Ulsteria" and the epigram
on the second reading of the Bill, put, it is true, into the mouth of
"A rebellious Rad":--
Butchered--to make an Easter Holiday,
For Orangemen who yearn to have their say!
They've got political _delirium tremens_.
_Orange_? Nay, they're sour as unripe lemons!
In the "Essence of Parliament" little is said of the arguments,
but we get a glimpse of Lord Randolph Churchill's
return to the political arena and echoes of the unbridled
loquacity of Mr. Sexton. The cartoons are more instructive,
notably that on the introduction of the "Guillotine" by Gladstone,
with the G.O.M. as chief operator, Harcourt and
Morley as republican soldiers, and Amendments, as heads,
falling into a waste-paper basket. The fate of the measure is
neatly hit off in the "Little Billee" cartoon; Home Rule as
"Little Billee" is about to be massacred by the House of Lords,
represented by Salisbury and Hartington as chief villains.
"Little Billee" in the legend not only survived but attained
high distinction in after life; but it is hard to say whether
_Punch_ implied a similar resurrection for the Bill of 1893. But
whatever were his views on the merits of Home Rule, _Punch_
was decidedly critical of the Government's naval policy, and
when Mr. Gladstone and Mr. Morley had simultaneously made
seemingly irreconcilable speeches on the subject, he adroitly
invoked the shade of Cobden, who had, in certain conditions,
proclaimed himself a Big Navyite. _Punch_ fortified the
argument by a set of verses headed "Rule Britannia" and
ending with this stanza:--
Devotion to the needs of home
And claims parochial is not all.
Beware lest shades more darkling come
With gloomier writings on the wall.
Rule, Britannia! Britannia, rule the waves!
Britons to careless trust should ne'er be slaves.
[Sidenote: _Mr. Gladstone and his Successor_]
Yet when Mr. Gladstone resigned the premiership, early in 1894,
_Punch's_ tribute is an unqualified eulogy of the "Lancelot of our
lists":--
"Unarm, _Eros_; the long day's task is done."
This is no _Antony_; here's a nobler one;
Yet like the Roman his great course is run.
From source to sea a fair full-flooded flow
Of stainless waters, swelling as they go,
Now widening broad in the sun's westering glow,
Broad widening to the ocean, whither all
The round world's fertilizing floods must fall,
The sweeping river with the streamlet small.
Hang up the sword! It struck its latest stroke,
A swashing one, there where the closed ranks broke
Into wild cheers that all the echoes woke.
That stroke, the last, was swift, and strong, and keen,
Now hang thou there, though sheathed, yet silver-clean,
For never felon stroke has dimmed thy sheen!
For thee, good knight and grey, whose gleaming crest
Leads us no longer, every generous breast
Breathes benediction on thy well-won rest.
The field looks bare without thee, and o'ercast
With dark and ominous shadows, and thy last
_Reveille_ was a rousing battle-blast!
But though with us the strife may hardly cease,
We wish thee, in well-earned late-coming ease,
Long happy years of honourable peace!
The "last stroke" referred to was doubtless the speech in which Mr.
Gladstone uttered his warning to the Lords, a warning translated into
action by the Parliament Act of 1910. Lord Rosebery, his successor,
came from the gilded chamber, and, in spite of his democratic record
and brilliant gifts, was not enthusiastically welcomed by the Liberal
Party. But _Punch_ had no misgivings at the moment and acclaimed
him in a cartoon in which he enters the lists, "from spur to plume
a star of tournament," with Harcourt as his squire, a reading of
their relations hardly borne out by the sequel. The Cabinet were not
a "band of brothers," and, as we have said above, the most notable
legislative feature of the Liberal administration was the "Radical
Budget" of Sir William Harcourt. _Punch's_ comment, in the cartoon "The
Depressed Dukes" and the verses on "The Stately Homes of England,"
combined prescience with a touch of malice. The Duke of Devonshire
is shown saying to the Duke of Westminster, "If this Budget passes,
I don't know how I am going to keep up Chatsworth," and the Duke of
Westminster replies, "If you come to that, we may consider ourselves
lucky if we can keep a tomb over our heads." Mr. Chamberlain's famous
phrase about "ransom" is recalled, in view of his _rapprochement_
to the Tories, to illustrate his falling away from Radicalism, and
_Punch's_ references to him are, for a while, critical to the verge of
hostility. Sambourne's picture of the interesting development of the
"Josephus Cubicularius (orchidensis)" exhibits his evolution from the
manufacturer of screws, the republican and the radical, to the patriot,
society pet, and full-blown Conservative with a peerage looming in
the future; while in the "Essence of Parliament" he is ironically
complimented on investing the High Court of Westminster with "the tone
and atmosphere of the auction-room."
On the other hand, _Punch_ recognized that a disposition to add to our
Imperial responsibilities was no longer a Tory monopoly. Uganda was
annexed in 1894, and John Bull is seen finding a black baby on his
doorstep: "What, _another_! Well, I suppose I must take it in," the
explanatory verses being headed "_Prestige oblige_." The assassination
of President Carnot prompts a tribute to France:--
Sister in sorrow now as once in arms,
Of old fair enemy in many a field--
an obvious adaptation of Sir Philip Sidney's "that sweet enemy France."
But in the realm of foreign affairs the most striking event was the
Chino-Japanese war. Here _Punch's_ sympathies are clearly revealed in
his cartoon, "Jap the Giant-killer," with an up-to-date fairy-tale
text; in the picture of Japan as the Infant Phenomenon lecturing on
the Art of War to John Bull, Jonathan, the Kaiser and other crowned
heads; and in the condemnation of the jealous intervention of Russia
and Germany to rob Japan, who had "played a square game," of the fruits
of victory. The death of the Tsar Alexander III in November, 1894, is
commemorated in a cartoon in which Peace is chief mourner. _Punch_, as
we have seen, had not been enthusiastic over the gravitation of Russia
towards a French alliance; but no official declaration of its existence
was made until 1897, though it was mentioned publicly by M. Ribot in
1895.
[Illustration: "WHO SAID--'ATROCITIES'?"
(After the popular engraving)
"Old as I am my feelings have not been deadened in regard to matters
of such a dreadful description." (_Mr. Gladstone's Birthday speech at
Hawarden on the Armenian atrocities_.)]
[Sidenote: _The Seven Lord Roseberys_]
The Rosebery Cabinet resigned in June, 1895. _Punch's_ admiration
for Lord Rosebery had steadily waned during his brief tenure of the
Premiership, and distrust of his versatility is revealed in the
versified comment on Mr. St. Loe Strachey's article in the _Nineteenth
Century_. There the "Seven Ages of Rosebery" are traced, in the manner
of Jaques, from the Home Ruler onward through the phase of London
County Council chairman to Premier, and Sphinx _à la_ Dizzy, ending:--
Last scene of all
That ends this strange eventful history,
Newmarket Rosebery, _Ladas_-owner, Lord--
_Sans_ grit, _sans_ nous, _sans_ go, _sans_ everything.
Lord Salisbury's third Cabinet was reinforced by the inclusion of
the Liberal-Unionists--the Duke of Devonshire, Mr. Goschen and Mr.
Chamberlain. It was a powerful combination, but suffered in the long
run from the inherent drawbacks of all coalitions, though the course
of events postponed the inevitable disruption. Before the Liberals
left office, Mr. Gladstone had emerged from his retirement to denounce
the "Armenian Atrocities" and urge British intervention. Here, as in
earlier years, _Punch_ sided with the advanced Liberals, rejoiced
in his well-known cartoon, "Who said 'Atrocities'?" that there was
life in the old dog (Mr. Gladstone) yet; welcomed the adhesion of the
Duke of Argyll to Mr. Gladstone's campaign in another cartoon of the
"Old Crusaders: Bulgaria, 1876, Armenia, 1895"; and denounced the
unchangeable ferocity of the Turk. When the Bishop of Hereford invited
his clergy to send up petitions respecting the Armenian atrocities,
one vicar refused to protest against Turkish crimes, on the ground
that the English Government was exercising all its ingenuity to
persecute and plunder Christians here. This referred to the Liberal
Government's Welsh Disestablishment Bill. _Punch_ ironically declared
that the vicar's logic was as convincing as his Christian sympathy was
admirable. On the return of the Unionists to power, _Punch_ continued
to urge strong measures, and lamented the powerlessness of the "Great
Powers" to bring about reforms in Turkish administration.
[Sidenote: _The Kiel Canal_]
The retirement of Mr. Peel from the Speakership afforded _Punch_ a
fitting opportunity for recognizing his great qualities in maintaining
the dignity of his position, his "awesome mien and terrible voice" in
administering rebukes, and for joining in the chorus of congratulation
to the new Conductor of the Parliamentary Orchestra, Mr. Gully. As
for the protest of Lord Curzon, Lord Wolmer and Mr. St. John Brodrick
against the exclusion of peers from the House of Commons, _Punch_ dealt
faithfully with the movement in his comments on the "Pirate Peers."
Better still is the cartoon in which a bathing woman addresses a little
boy wearing a coronet, and battering with his toy spade at the door
of a bathing-machine labelled House of Commons. "Come along, Master
Selborne," she says, "and take your dip like a little nobleman." This
incident of May, 1895, is hardly worth mentioning save as an example
of self-protective insurance against future legislation aimed at
the power of the Upper House. For years to come _Punch's_ political
preoccupations were almost exclusively with questions of Imperial
policy and international relations. The opening of the Kiel Canal
practically coincided with the return to power of Lord Salisbury, and
is celebrated by _Punch_ in the same number in which he ironically
adapts Shakespeare's _Coriolanus_ to illustrate the alliance of Lord
Salisbury and Mr. Chamberlain. _Punch's_ representative went out on
the _Tantallon Castle_ with Mr. Gladstone, and gives a lively account
of the junketings on board and on shore, and the entertainment of
sovereigns and local magnates. In more serious vein _Punch_ editorially
hails the canal as a "Path of Peace," banishing misgivings and
remembrances of Denmark and France:--
Not war alone, but trade, will take the track
That shuns the wild and stormy Skager-Rak;
And may Brunsbüttel's now familiar name
Be little linked with Empire's big war-game;
May battle-echoes in the Baltic cease;
And the Canal be a new Path of Peace.
A couple of months later our friendly relations with Italy inspired a
cartoon in which Britannia congratulates Italy, but advises her to be
less visionary and more practical. Italy's finances were causing her
trouble; otherwise the advice showed an inability to sound the springs
of Italian policy. _Punch's_ pacific dreams were dispelled in the
autumn by the renewed troubles in Ashanti. Britannia, as he put it,
expected more than an umbrella this time; King Coffee's umbrella had
cost us £900,000 in 1874. Happily the expedition was well organized
and its immediate purpose executed, though a further expedition became
necessary in 1900. Far graver anxieties threatened us from Africa at
the close of the year, and since _Punch's_ criticisms of and comments
on the successive phases of controversy and conflict betray a certain
amount of variation and even inconsistency, it is as well to point
out that the unfriendly tone he had shown towards "Joe" in previous
years had largely abated upon Mr. Chamberlain's accession to office
as Colonial Secretary. In the account of a dinner held in the late
autumn of 1895 to celebrate the opening of railway communication
between Natal and the Cape, Mr. Chamberlain's speech is extolled as
"splendidly pitched, admirably phrased, and full of the Palmerstonian
ring." Simultaneously in "The Imperial Federalists' Vade Mecum" _Punch_
discourses on the difficulties, no longer insuperable, which attended
on the translation into reality of that dream of Imperial Federation
which had once been regarded as a nightmare.
[Sidenote: _Dr. Jameson's Popularity_]
The abortive Jameson Raid at the close of December, 1895, came as
a bombshell; and _Punch_, in his "Tug of War" cartoon, shows the
Uitlander trying to pull the British Lion into the Transvaal, while
Mr. Chamberlain is pulling him back. Canning's well-known lines on
"The Pilot that weathered the Storm" are rewritten in honour of Mr.
Chamberlain's handling of the crisis. A few months earlier _Punch_ had
ridiculed the Kaiser for his arbitrary absolutism in sending to prison
a private University teacher "for writing in praise of a certain kind
of soap." The famous telegram to President Krüger was dealt with more
audaciously in an apocryphal letter purporting to have been sent by the
Queen to her grandson:--
MEIN LIEBER WILLY,--Dies ist aber über alle Berge. Solch
eine confounded Impertinenz have ich nie gesehen. The fact of the
matter is that Du ein furchtbarer Schwaggerer bist. Warum kannst
Du nie ruhig bleiben, why can't you hold your blessed row? Musst
Du deinen Finger in jeder Torte haben? Was it for this that I made
you an Admiral meiner Flotte and allowed you to rig yourself out in
einer wunderschönen Uniform mit einem gekokten Hut? If you meant mir
any of your blooming cheek zu geben why did you make your grandmamma
Colonel eines Deutschen Cavallerie Regiments? Du auch bist Colonel
of a British Cavallerie Regiment, desto mehr die Schade, the more's
the pity. Als Du ein ganz kleiner Bube warst have ich Dich oft
tüchtig gespankt, and now that you've grown up you ought to be
spanked too.... Du weist nicht wo Du bist, you dunno where you are,
and somebody must teach you. Is Bismarck quite well? Das ist ein
kolossaler Kerl, nicht wahr? So lange. Don't be foolish any more.
Deine Dich liebende,
GRANDMAMMA.
This was followed up by the picture of the Kaiser as "Fidgety Phil."
But _Punch_ was already alive to the widespread hostility to England
which prevailed on the Continent, and did not shrink from suggesting
that we were ready at need to take up the challenge. He admitted the
popularity of "Dr. Jim," but irony underlies his dialogue between the
dubious Londoner, who asks:--
"How will they treat this Doctor Jim,
Who doesn't return a winner?"--
and the Hearty Citizen who replies:--
"There's only one way of treating _him_."--
"And that is?"--"Give him a dinner."
_Punch_ is ironically sympathetic, again, in his comment on the
statement that "About 130 letters awaited Dr. Jameson ... many of
them containing offers of marriage." A few months later, however,
_Punch_ supported the demand for his release on account of ill-health.
The cartoon based on Mr. Rhodes's resignation in May is headed,
"The Pity of it." South Africa (as Othello) says to him: "Cassio, I
love thee; but never more be officer of mine." _Punch_ adds as his
authority a statement in _The Times_: "Mr. Rhodes has no longer any
power of assailing or menacing the Transvaal. The military authority
in the Company's territory is in the hands of Sir Richard Martin.
The administration is in the hands of Lord Grey." It was about the
same time that _Punch_ published a design for a statue of Krüger, in
which the British Lion is shown in chains while Chamberlain kneels
obsequiously to the President.
[Illustration: THE RHODES COLOSSUS
Striding from Cape Town to Cairo]
South Africa was not our only source of anxiety in 1896. Indeed,
it may be said to have temporarily receded into the background as
a storm centre. For our strained relations with the United States
over the Venezuelan arbitration had been brought to a critical stage
by President Cleveland's message. The conciliatory speeches of Mr.
Chamberlain and Mr. Balfour in January led _Punch_ to represent them
in the act of placating the American Eagle with caresses and sugar.
He was better inspired in his open letter to Mr. W. D. Howells, the
distinguished American writer, recognizing his generous and courageous
efforts to create a better mutual understanding between the two
countries. In particular he saluted the "Golden words" in which Mr.
Howells criticized his own countrymen:--
[Sidenote: _Letter to Mr. Howells_]
"What I chiefly object to in our patriotic emotion, however, was
not that it was so selfish but that it was so insensate, so stupid.
It took no account of things infinitely more precious than national
honour, such as humanity, civilization, and
'the long result of time'
which must suffer in a conflict between peoples like the English and
the Americans. For the sake of having our ships beat their ships, our
poor fellows slaughter their poor fellows, we were all willing, for
one detestable instant at least, to have the rising hopes of mankind
dashed, and the sense of human brotherhood blunted in the hearts of
the foremost people of the world."
But is there, as you say, "in the American heart a hatred of England,
which glutted itself in her imagined disaster and disgrace when we
all read the President's swaggering proclamation, in which he would
not yield to the enemy so far as even to write good English"? Is
there to be no forgiveness, are we never to cancel old scores and
begin our international book-keeping, if I may so term it, on a clean
page? I do not think our people hate yours. Your dash, your pluck,
your humour, your keen common sense, your breezy and inexhaustible
energy, your strength and broad capacity for government, all these
qualities command and obtain from us a sincere tribute of admiration.
If you hate us, we must submit to that melancholy condition, but never
submit in such a fashion as to cease from honest effort to abate
and in the end to remove all hatred. Blood, as one of your naval
captains[1] said on a memorable occasion, is thicker than water. So
saying, he dashed in to the help of our sorely pressed ships. Let us
then call a truce to petty and malignant carping, and join hands in
an alliance dependent not upon written treaties, but upon the noble
sympathy of two great nations engaged in the same work of civilization
and progress. You, Sir, speaking for others, I trust, as well as for
yourself, have set us an example.
Believe me, yours in all cordial friendship,
PUNCH.
[Footnote 1: Josiah Tatnall, flag-officer of the East India Squadron in
1856.]
It was in the same spirit that _Punch_ welcomed a remark in the New
York _Morning Press_: "After all the English people are our people,
and we are theirs," and deprecated as suicidal any efforts to forsake
a common heritage and rend asunder a family tree. The tension passed,
thanks to diplomacy and arbitration, and towards the close of the year
we find _Punch_ welcoming Mr. McKinley on his election as President,
the Shade of Washington (with a somewhat bulbous nose) congratulating
Columbia: "'Sound Money' is the best policy." Meanwhile the expedition
to Khartum had been decided on; the House of Commons, reassured by a
confident speech from Mr. Chamberlain, having approved of the forward
policy by a two to one vote, in spite of the misgivings of Mr. Morley,
Sir William Harcourt and Sir Charles Dilke. _Punch_, mindful of 1884,
registered his approval in the cartoon in which the Shade of Gordon
in the desert utters the one word, "Remember!" Wars and rumours of
wars did not distract _Punch's_ attention from the peaceful rivalry of
commerce. He was still much concerned by Germany's competition, which
he typified in his cartoon of British Trade as the old woman whose
petticoats were "cut all round about," while she was asleep, by a
German pedlar. And the commercial significance of Li Hung Chang's visit
is not overlooked in the generally farcical handling of that extremely
astute Oriental. In the cartoon "China in the Bull Shop," rival
Continental shopkeepers, who had got no orders out of him, are consumed
with envy and curiosity. If _Punch_ is to be believed, their envy was
ill-founded. Li Hung Chang displayed a boundless inquisitiveness,
but there was "nothing doing" in the way of business between him and
his hosts. _Punch_ drew mainly on his imagination for the events of
the visit, and ascribed to Li Hung Chang a number of topical Chinese
proverbs. The best of them--"Half an official welcome is better than an
ill-bred mobbing"--refers to his arrival in the "dead" season.
[Sidenote: _Two Modern Hamlets_]
Lord Rosebery resigned the leadership of the Liberal Party in June.
While still in office he had estranged the Radical stalwarts by his
Imperialist foreign policy and his heretical view of the necessity of
converting the "predominant partner," England, before attempting to
revive Home Rule. His Government, as one of his colleagues put it, were
condemned to the task of "ploughing the sands." In the intervening year
the gulf that severed him from the stalwarts and the Nonconformist
conscience had been widened by his refusal to join in Mr. Gladstone's
Armenian crusade, and henceforth he decided to "plough a lonely
furrow." In later years he made occasional dramatic interventions,
but his official career, like that of his contemporary at Eton, Lord
Randolph Churchill, closed before he was fifty.
[Illustration: THE CHESTERFIELD HAMLET
LORD R-S-B-RY (in leading rôle):
"The 'Party's' out of joint;--O, cursèd spite,
That ever I was 'asked' to set it right!"
Act i, scene 5, _Mr. Punch's edition_.
]
Our relations with the United States were bettered at the opening
of 1897 by the signing of the Arbitration Treaty adjusting the
Venezuelan question. In Europe events did not conduce to diminish
our unpopularity. It was the year of the brief Greco-Turkish war,
which revived old divisions of opinion at home. _Punch_ was no lover
of the Turk; he realized the difficulties of King George, whom he
depicted as Hamlet at Athens, recognizing (like Lord Rosebery) that
the "time was out of joint" and deploring "the cursed spite that he
was ever born to set it right"; but he supported Lord Salisbury in
severely rebuking the hundred M.P.'s who had sent the King a message of
encouragement. The verses, modelled on Tennyson's "Charge of the Light
Brigade," disparaged the message as mere gaseous talk, which did not
mean business, and was bound to end in smoke. Criticism of the Kaiser
becomes more animated than moderate; the frequent prosecutions for
_lèse-majesté_, and the famous pamphlet, in which Professor Quidde of
Munich ingeniously satirized the Kaiser's megalomania in an historical
essay on the aberrations of Caligula, inspire a caustic open letter
to Wilhelm II, the gist of which is that, though old enough to know
better, he was still the victim of the capricious extravagance of
youth:--
Formerly I imagined that throughout Germany, and from time to time in
Russia, Austria, or in Italy, an imperial but soaringly human boy was
lifting his glass and crying, "Hoch! Hoch! Hoch!" amid the clatter of
swords and the admiring shouts of a profusely-decorated soldiery. Now
I know that a stout gentleman is doing these things, and reducing his
hearers to an abyss of melancholy at his dismal failure in dignity. A
boy who played fantastic tricks with the telegraph-wires incurred but
a mild censure. What shall be said of a middle-aged and pompous party
whose pleasure it is to play practical jokes that set two nations by
the ears?
[Sidenote: _The "Raid" and its Aftermath_]
Yours is a great inheritance, greatly won by heroic deeds. Your
people are by nature the mildest and most loyal, and by tradition and
education the most thoughtful, in Europe. But mild and loyal as they
are their minds must rise in revolt against a sovereign who reproduces
in the crudest form the stale theories of divine right and arbitrary
government, whose one notion of administration is to increase his
stupendous military forces by taxation while diminishing the number
of his reasonable critics by imprisonment. You have travelled, cocked
hat in hand, to capital after capital, you have dismissed Bismarck,
you have made yourself into the tin god of a great monarchy, you have
shouted, reviewed, toasted, speechified, you have donned a thousand
different uniforms, you have dabbled in the drama, you have been
assisted in the design of allegorical cartoons, you have composed
hymns to Ægir, and Heaven knows how many others--and to-day the
result of all your restless and misdirected energies is that you have
added not only to your army but also to the foreign ill-wishers of
your country and to her internal distractions. And at this moment,
in spite of the millions of men and money that go to form her army,
Germany is weaker than she has been at any moment since the Empire was
proclaimed at Versailles. This feat, Sir, you have accomplished, and
such credit as attaches to it is yours alone. Where and how do you
propose to end?
In lighter vein but with equal disrespect _Punch_ satirizes the
instructions to Prince Henry on starting with the naval expedition to
Kiao-Chow. In particular _Punch_ dwells, not unfairly, on the Kaiser's
insistence on the sanctity of his mission. It was to be a Holy war:--
To preach abroad in each distinct locality
The gospel of my hallowed personality.
Another was added to the long list of Indian Frontier wars in the
Tirah campaign. _Punch_ did well to recognize the loyalty of native
officers, N.C.O.s and men, while saluting the achievements of the
Gordon Highlanders in his verses to their Commander, Colonel Mathias.
The men were "doing splendidly," but as Colonel _Punch_ says in one
cartoon, "Yes, they always do; but is this 'forward policy' worth all
this?" And a similar misgiving is revealed in an article implying that
so-called "peaceful missions" to barbarian kings were too often closely
followed up by punitive expeditions. The "repercussions" of the Jameson
Raid were not overlooked. _Punch_ made merry over President Krüger's
famous claim for "moral and intellectual damages"; but his criticisms
are not confined to the Boers. The proceedings of the South African
Committee of Inquiry prompted a parallel between Warren Hastings
and Cecil Rhodes, in which the Indian proconsul remarks to the new
Empire-builder: "_I_ succeeded and was impeached; you fail--and are
called as a witness."
Of the second or Diamond Jubilee of Queen Victoria, the last great
State pageant of her reign, one may say that it was more than a great
act of veneration and loyalty; it was a celebration of Imperial
expansion and solidarity which formed a reassuring interlude on the eve
of events that were destined to test that solidarity to the utmost. For
1898 was the year of Fashoda, of the conflict over the "open door" in
China, and of the Spanish-American war. I put Fashoda first, because
the incident came perilously near embroiling us in war with France.
It was not an isolated expression of French resentment, since the
general attitude of British public opinion over the Dreyfus affair had
greatly inflamed Anglophobia in France. _Punch_, like the majority of
Englishmen, was strongly Dreyfusard. Early in the year he published his
cartoon, based on Holman Hunt's picture, in which Zola figures as the
"Dreyfus Scapegoat"--a reference to the famous "J'accuse" article--and
a similar spirit is shown in the "Dreyfus Dictionary," in which strong
hostility is shown to all the leading actors on the anti-Dreyfus side.
On a large and sincerely patriotic section of the French public,
exasperated by what they considered to be a gratuitous interference in
a domestic affair, _Punch's_ comments on the occupation of Fashoda in
the Sudan by Colonel Marchand operated like vitriol on a raw wound.
They certainly were not flattering to one, who if not a very discreet
was a very gallant soldier. Beginning with a farcical burlesque of the
stealthy invasion of the French, they go on from ridicule to contempt.
"Marchez, Marchand," says John Bull to the Colonel, ironically
congratulating him on having had a "nice little scientific trip." The
last straw was the cartoon in which John Bull says: "Go away, go away,"
to a French organ-grinder with a little monkey in uniform perched on
his instrument, which is labelled Fashoda. The organ-grinder says,
"Eh? What you give me if I go?" and John Bull retorts: "I'll give
you something if you _don't_." A "furious Gaul" broke _Mr. Punch's_
windows, and now we can understand and forgive the retaliation. It may
have been an added sting to say, as _Punch_ did on the best authority,
that Colonel Marchand had been really saved from the Dervishes by
Kitchener's success at Omdurman. Anyhow, it was fortunate that Lord
Kitchener, who had served with the French in 1870 in Chanzy's army, was
in charge of the negotiations with Colonel Marchand on the spot. The
French Government did not give way until six weeks had passed, during
which Irish members had avowed their sympathy with France, and _Punch_
addressed her with serious warnings and even bellicose threats.
For the peaceful adjustment of what looked like a _casus belli_, we
certainly owe more to Lord Kitchener than to _Punch_. The battle of
Omdurman, fought on September 2, 1898, was the culminating point of
a carefully planned campaign which had lasted more than two years,
and was duly celebrated in _Punch's_ cartoon of the re-occupation of
Khartum, with the statue of Gordon, avenged after thirteen years, in
the background. Lord Kitchener lost no time in issuing his appeal for
funds to erect the Gordon Memorial College in Khartum, to which _Punch_
dedicated his cartoon of "Dreaming True." The agreement delimiting the
respective spheres of England and France in North Africa was not signed
till January 19, 1899, but Punch had foreshadowed the issue in his
cartoon of John Bull as a "Fixture" in Egypt, his features replacing
the battered countenance of the Sphinx.
[Illustration: "FOR QUEEN AND EMPIRE!!"]
It cannot be said that _Punch_ was any more conciliatory to the United
States over the Spanish-American war than he had been to France over
Fashoda. He is sympathetic to the young King of Spain, shown as a
small boy on the throne threatened by Bellona and Revolution. Both in
prose and verse he is distinctly hostile to the U.S.A., ironically
crediting them with no desire to annex Cuba, but talking almost in the
same breath of "filibustering" and "spread-eagling." And when Cuba was
acquired _Punch_ professes to regard it as anything but an unmixed
blessing. Spain is shown saying to Uncle Sam: "Well, you wanted him!
You've got him! And I wish you joy of him!"--Cuba being represented as
an ill-conditioned little coloured boy. _Punch's_ reading of the Treaty
of Peace was that Uncle Sam would agree to anything if Spain would take
Cuba back; while in another cartoon European resentment of American
intrusion into European politics is typified by a very "sniffy" Europa
asking Uncle Sam if he is "any relation of the late Colonel Monroe."
All this did not make for good blood, or the promotion of that friendly
understanding applauded in _Punch's_ letter to Mr. Howells, but it
may be pleaded in extenuation that some of the sanest and wisest and
noblest Americans were not at all happy about the Spanish war, and
that Charles Eliot Norton openly denounced the mixture of hypocrisy and
thoughtlessness with which his countrymen had plunged into it.
[Sidenote: _The "Open Door" in China_]
[Illustration: "GOD SAVE THE KING!"]
The conflicting commercial interests of various Powers in China are
also the subject of a good deal of frank comment at the expense of
Russia and Germany. In one cartoon the British Lion is shown with a
barrow-load of goods denied entrance by the Bear at the "free port" of
Talienwan. In another, the "Open Door" is reduced to a farce, being
occupied by the Bear armed to the teeth and a German entrenched in
tariffs. A third, entitled "The Sentinels," is based on the view that
the occupation of Port Arthur left us no alternative but to occupy
Wei-hai-wei in order to restore the equilibrium upset by Russia. The
powerlessness of the young Emperor, who had proposed a scheme of
reforms, is clearly indicated in the dialogue in which the "Son of
Heaven" discusses his Aunt--the formidable Dowager-Empress. _Punch_ had
a friendly greeting for the young Queen of Holland on the attainment of
her majority, referring to the House of Orange as a link with our Royal
family; but for the most part wherever he saw a crowned head he hit
it. The _lèse-majesté_ campaign in Germany had led to the prosecution
of Herr Trojan, the editor of the _Kladderadatsch_, to whom _Punch_
offered his "Prosit," regretting that there was not also the companion
offence of _Humanitätsbeleidigung_ for which punishment could be
awarded to "the Imperial buffoon." This was the year in which the young
Tsar Nicholas put forward his proposal for general disarmament, but
_Punch's_ comments are very much on the lines of his satirical report
of an imaginary meeting of the Nations summoned by the Arbitration
League in 1894. Everybody was anxious to disarm so long as somebody
else set the example. This scepticism now finds vent in the cartoon
in which Peace suggests disarmament to Vulcan, understanding that the
Tsar's proposal had already seriously interfered with his trade. Vulcan
promptly undeceives her. He never was busier--and on orders for Russia.
The assassination of the Empress of Austria in September passed without
mention in _Punch_, an omission probably accidental rather than
deliberate, since she was popular in England as a great sportswoman. She
was also a generous and enlightened patron of the arts, unconventional
in her ways, blameless in her life, yet doomed by malign fate to
the supreme infelicity of grandeur.
[Sidenote: _Gladstone and "C.-B."_]
_Punch_ certainly missed a great opportunity for a chivalrous tribute
to a lady whose unhappiness was greater than her rank, to say nothing
of a text for a sermon on the notorious ineptitude of assassins in
the choice of victims. Still, it was a harder theme than that which
inspired _Punch's_ most notable memorial verses in 1898--the death of
Mr. Gladstone. The writer contrasts his end with that of those who
have died in their early prime or the ripeness of their manhood, and
continues:--
But you, O veteran of a thousand fights,
Whose toil had long attained its perfect end--
Death calls you not as one that claims his rights,
But gently as a friend.
For though that matchless energy of mind
Was firm to front the menace of decay,
Your bodily strength on such a loss declined
As only Death could stay.
So then with you 'tis well, who after pain,
After long pain, have reached your rest at last;
But we--ah, when shall England mould again
This type of splendour past?
Noble in triumph, noble in defeat,
Leader of hopes that others held forlorn,
Strong in the faith that looks afar to meet
The flush of Freedom's morn.
* * * * *
And now, with all your armour laid aside,
Swift eloquence your sword, and, for your shield,
The indomitable courage that defied
The fortune of the field--
As in the noontide of your high command,
So in the final hour when darkness fell,
Submissive still to that untiring Hand
That orders all things well--
We bear you to your resting-place apart
Between the ranks where ancient foe and friend,
Kin by a common sorrow at the heart
Silent together bend.
A new leader of the Liberal Party emerged in 1899 in Sir Henry
Campbell-Bannerman. Sir William Harcourt is shown wishing his successor
joy--rather ironically--and Mr. Balfour, in the cartoon of "The
Wrestlers," acknowledges the strength of his opponent after their
first round. "C.-B.'s" promotion to leadership coincided with the
discussion of the Tsar's disarmament proposals, which the Liberal
leader was destined to revive later on, and in May, representatives
of Great Britain attended the Hague Conference convened on the Tsar's
initiative. The enthusiasm which _Punch_ had displayed a generation
earlier over the Paris Conference had now evaporated, and his
contributions to the subject are marked by farcical scepticism. The
Tsar and the Kaiser are shown in one picture holding, at some uncertain
date in the future, an imaginary review of what remains of the Russian
Army, the soldiers resembling Stigginses armed with umbrellas.
_Punch's_ twelve suggestions are a _reductio ad absurdum_ of the Tsar's
idea, the first being a proposal to postpone the coming into operation
of the new rules for 1,000 years. The list of "Some Probable Agenda"
for the Hague Conference, published when it was already sitting, is
pure burlesque. For example: "Declarations of war shall in future be
abolished as being calculated to wound the feelings of opponents." In
the same number there is a large picture of Imperial Bruin drinking
to Peace, coupling the toast with the name of Victoria, Empress of
India (the Queen had just celebrated her eightieth birthday), with a
batch of papers, labelled "Further demands in China," behind his back.
The political atmosphere was not conducive to the calm discussion of
international peace. _Punch's_ espousal of the cause of Dreyfus became
increasingly vehement and provocative. In May, under the heading "_A
bas la Vérité_," Truth is shown saying "I must get out" (of her well),
while the French generals reply: "Not if we know it." A month later, in
"At Last," Tenniel depicts indignant Justice triumphing with the Sword
of Revision, and trampling Lies and Forgery under foot. The universal
preoccupation with the topic is illustrated in Phil May's picture
of the little street boy crying because his father "has got Drifus
fever." In September, Napoleon's shade is shown scornfully surveying
a group of degenerate generals eagerly discussing a "secret dossier",
and saying, "_Vive l'armée!_ Yes! But it was not with generals like
you that I won my campaigns!" In the face of death _Punch_ has always
shown restraint, and, whether from ignorance or of set purpose, wrote
of President Faure:--
He sought to serve his country's needs
And dying died with harness on.
[Sidenote: _The Verdict of Rennes_]
But the address to France "in memory of the verdict of Rennes" amounts
to an indictment of the whole nation:--
Who speaks of pardon? Nay, for France there's none,
Nor can be never till the damnèd blot
Be wiped away and expiation done.
Then, not till then,
May be renewed the bonds that once have been,
Since we, whatever else, are honest men.
Meanwhile, we know you not!
Go, hide your face until your heart is clean.
_Punch_, it is true, spoke with a different voice on the same page, but
it is doubtful whether his levity was calculated to heal the effect of
his self-righteous indignation:--
SOME FURTHER SELF-DENYING ORDINANCES
To be observed by those who wish to testify their righteous
indignation at the Rennes verdict by boycotting next year's Paris
Exposition, and in the most material and convincing manner to bring
about the complete rehabilitation of the unfortunate prisoner.
It is proposed--
That no more French leave shall be taken by individuals desirous of
absenting themselves from their duties or annexing other persons'
property. Undergraduates will faithfully attend every lecture,
city clerks will bury no more aunts, cooks will cease to entertain
policemen, and there will be a close time for burglary, kleptomania
and kissing under the mistletoe.
That the use of French chalk shall be abandoned in ballrooms, and
dancing given up altogether, except on village greens.
That "Frenchmen," alias red-legged partridges, shall be shot on sight,
and given to the retriever to eat.
That elbow-grease shall be substituted for French polish.
That French beans shall be cut and given the cold shoulder at table.
That the French language (which at the present moment chiefly consists
of the verb _conspuer_) shall be tabooed, except in the case of
solecisms like _nom de plume_, _double entendre_, _à l'outrance_,
and so forth. _Café_, _coupé_ and similar words shall be pronounced
"caif," "coop," etc., as in Canada. _Dépôt_ shall be "depott";
_sang froid_, _au revoir_, _tableaux vivants_ and the like shall be
similarly anglicized. Boulogne to be called "Boolong," if mentioned at
all, which is inadvisable. No more bull-fights to be attended.
That French grey shall in future mean, as circumstances demand, either
black or white.
Towards America _Punch_ shows a tempered benevolence in his open letter
to President McKinley, whom he warns against the new-fangled policy of
Imperial expansion. His welcome to Mr. Choate, on his appointment as
American Ambassador, is entirely cordial: "There are only two things
necessary to make your visit a success. Don't believe all you hear, and
read your _Punch_ regularly." I do not know whether Mr. Choate took the
second piece of advice or not; the first was quite unnecessary. He was
a huge success as an Ambassador, though his chief claim on the abiding
affection of England rests on his noble and self-sacrificing exertions,
in extreme old age and up to the day of his death, in furthering the
cause of the Allies and strengthening the brotherhood in arms of
America and Great Britain.
[Sidenote: _Lord Milner Censured_]
Meanwhile events in South Africa were rapidly approaching a critical
stage. At Mr. Chamberlain's request, a conference between Sir Alfred
Milner and President Krüger was held at Bloemfontein early in June
to adjust the conflicting claims of the Transvaal Boers and the
Uitlanders, whose position Sir Alfred Milner had compared to that of
"helots." _Punch_ summed up the conference in two cartoons. In the
first, headed "Moral Suasion," Milner is seen endeavouring to pacify
Krüger as a cow: "I will sit on the stile and continue to smile." In
the second, "The Smile that Failed," the High Commissioner remarks:--
I _have_ sat on this Stile
And continued to Smile,
But it's had no effect on the Cow.
[Illustration: THE SMILE THAT FAILED
SIR ALFR-D M-LN-R again sings:--
"There was a 'High Com.' who said, 'Now
I've conferred with this wily old cow!
I _have_ sat on this stile,
And continued to smile,
But it's had no effect on the Cow!'" (_Exit._)
]
[Illustration: "Yer know, them Boers 'as been storin' guns and
hambition for years!"]
A very different reading of the situation is given in the letter to
Sir Alfred Milner published a week later. Here the High Commissioner
is heavily censured not for the failure of the conference, but for the
"ridiculous" and "frothy" tone of his dispatch about "helots," and for
his rash, impetuous and overbearing temper. In July _Punch_ was still
inclined to make light of the whole business, apparently expecting
an amicable settlement, and in a burlesque "Story of a Crisis" in
"Nabothsland" reflected adversely if obliquely on the pretensions of
the Uitlanders. Yet early in September sympathy with the Uitlanders
underlies the verses condemning the inconsistency of Little Englanders,
who in theory espouse the cause of all oppressed nationalities but
their own. The damning blot on the Uitlanders' cause was that they were
English. If they had been Finns, for instance, the Little Englander
would have shed his last drop of ink in their defence. This was at
the lowest a good debating point, and at all points preferable to the
unfortunate picture ridiculing the unmilitary appearance of the Boers,
President Krüger being shown in the act of reviewing his veterans, a
number of fat, unwieldy farmers. The declaration of war came early
in October, and _Punch_ unhesitatingly declared his support of the
decision in the cartoon "Plain English," where John Bull says to the
Boers: "As you will fight, you shall have it. This time it is a fight
to a finish." So it was; but few, except Lord Wolseley, expected that
the finish would only be reached after a long, obstinate and costly
struggle. Lord Wolseley's warning in September, 1899, foreshadows the
more famous anticipation of the duration of the Great War made by Lord
Kitchener fifteen years later. Many other parallels and contrasts
are suggested in _Punch's_ pages as he reflects the varying moods of
England during the chequered progress of the campaign. The divisions of
opinion at home were more acute than in 1914. Moreover, we entered on
the Boer war in a spirit of confidence and complacency
[Sidenote: _The Boer War_]
which rendered the initial reverses more surprising and depressing.
Otherwise the alternations of despondency and elation; the criticisms
of mismanagement, laxity and indifference, want of intelligence and
imagination; and the charges against the enemy of disregarding the
rules of the game have a curiously familiar ring. _Punch_ reflected
popular opinion in resenting the "detachment" of Mr. Balfour in
describing our reverses as "inevitable," and in rebuking the optimism
of other Ministers; in his demand for the "facts"; in attributing to
President Krüger gratitude to the Opposition for their assistance;
in his cheering message to Baden-Powell for "keeping his end up" in
Mafeking. Yet he commented severely on the diamond speculators for
their "operations" during the war; he had a good word for Lord Morley
when he was attacked as a Little Englander; and a strong rebuke for the
agencies which announced tours to the South African battlefields as
early as April, 1900. Punch had shown John Bull as Mark Tapley--when
Kimberley had been relieved and Lord Roberts was advancing--but his
comments on the publication of the Spion Kop dispatches reveal grave
dissatisfaction with the conduct of the Natal campaign:--
SOME ONE HAD BLUNDERED
Sir Redvers devised an impossible plan
Which he trusted to Warren, an obstinate man;
Lord Roberts sent home some dispatches, and there
He freely expressed what he thought of the pair.
The War Office published these documents plain,
To the joy of their foes, and the grief of the sane;
And while they were reading them, all the world wondered,
And promptly concluded that everyone blundered.
Humorous relief was provided by the report that Krüger had encouraged
his burghers by circulating the news that London had been captured by
the Russians, a method foreshadowing the imaginative exploits of the
Germans in the late war. It was based, however, on an incontestable
fact--our unpopularity in both hemispheres. The Boer delegates had
been welcomed in America, though _Punch_ sought to discount the effect
of their propaganda by a cartoon in which Columbia reassures John Bull:
"Don't mind those noisy boys of mine. You know, my dear, it's _Election
Time_."
The Anglophobe feeling was much more vocal in France, and _Punch_ gives
a curious account of the Transvaal section of the Paris Exhibition in
October, where signatures were invited and freely appended to addresses
to the two Presidents, the bust of Krüger was crowned with palm
branches, poetic eulogies were circulated, and the walls covered with
"_Mort aux Anglais_," "Chamberlain _est un vache_," etc. Meanwhile,
Mafeking had been relieved, and _Punch_ had defended the "loud extremes
of passionate joy" which added the now well-nigh forgotten verb "to
Maffick" to our current vocabulary. Lord Roberts's uninterrupted
advance to Pretoria had moved _Punch_, with many others, to declare
very prematurely on June 6th that the war was practically over, though
it lasted nearly two years longer, and the slow progress of "rounding
up" the Boers actually prompted the suggestion from a leading paper
that Lord Kitchener should be recalled and Lord Roberts sent out again.
President Krüger's flitting is illustrated in a cartoon in which "Oom
Paul" is seen in a small boat, with two millions of treasure, quitting
the sinking ship _Transvaal_; while in a set of verses, written after
reading of his triumphal progress through France, _Punch_ prophesies
for him a green old age in Grosvenor Square. The C.I.V.'s returned
in the autumn and were welcomed by the City of London; and shortly
afterwards "a Mr. Williams offered respectful apologies to Satan for
mentioning him in the same breath with Lord Kitchener." _Punch_, even
in his most Chauvinistic mood, never indulged in such abuse of the Boer
generals, and at the end of 1900 paid a well-deserved compliment to the
elusive De Wet in his cartoon of "De Wet o' de Wisp."
[Sidenote: _China and Australia_]
Before dealing with the subsequent progress of the "guerrilla war,"
we may turn aside for a moment to other developments overseas. In an
epigram on "The Millennium" in August, 1900, _Punch_ writes:--
In some problematic day
Strife and wrath shall fade away,
Crews no longer blessing pouring
On the coxes who have cox'd,
When the Boers shall cease from boring
And the Boxers shall be boxed.
The revolt of the Boxers in China and the joint expedition of the
European Powers assisted by Japan to relieve the Legations in Peking
are treated in two cartoons. In the first, in which the Chinese Dragon
is seen in the background, Japan expresses her readiness to help the
European Powers. She is glad to join them, "but permit me to remark
that if some of you hadn't interfered when I had him down, it would
have saved all this trouble"--a legitimate comment on the intervention
of Germany and Russia after the Chino-Japanese war. In the second, "The
Closed Door," Europa is seen armed with an axe, preparing to break her
way in to the relief of the Legations. Apocryphal reports of what was
happening in China reached a high-water mark of mendacity this summer,
and the English Press did not escape the charge of credulity, to put
it mildly. Reports of the death of the Dowager Empress were so common
as to inspire _Punch_ with a poetic homage to the "lady of the charmed
life," and when she shifted her capital, he showed Krüger looking over
a wall at her exodus with the remark: "My idea!"
It was in 1900 also that the Australian Commonwealth Bill was
introduced by Mr. Chamberlain. _Punch_ in his first reference to the
measure, animated by a recognition of Australia's loyalty in the
Boer war, assumed that Clause 74, abolishing the appeal to the Privy
Council, would be passed. Australia is seen showing the new latchkey
she has had made, as she wanted a little more freedom, and Britannia
declares her readiness to trust her. This proved premature, and a
little later on _Punch_, in a letter to the Australian delegates, waxes
sarcastic over the "niggling, pedantic and pettifogging inquisition
which it was proposed to institute into the demand for Federation"--_à
propos_ of the Privy Council Appeals. As a matter of fact, the clause
was amended, because the States were not at one on the point, and all
seven Chief Justices favoured the maintenance of the right of Appeal.
Lord Roberts returned to England at the close of the year, and _Punch_
saluted his arrival in "The Home-coming of the Chief." His great
services are acknowledged, not least his self-sacrifice in the hour of
bitter personal loss:--
Ah! but while a nation's cries
Storm against our sullen skies
'Midst the madness and the mirth
Flung about your victor's way,
If behind the brave array
All the hidden heart were known,
Save for love of England's name
Gladly would you yield the prize,
Glory, triumph, wealth and fame,
Could you win one grace alone,
Could you have your boy again
Home from where he takes his rest
Lying under alien earth
By Colenso's dreadful plain,
With the Cross above his breast.
[Illustration: "REQUIESCAT!"]
That is truly and finely said, and yet how strangely the epithet
"dreadful" sounds to those who have found all the vocabulary of horror
beggared by the experiences of the Great War! The opening of the New
Year was clouded by the passing of Queen Victoria. In all the sixty
years of _Punch's_ existence, even in the moods when his comments on
Court and Crown had been frank to the verge of audacity, loyalty to the
person of the Sovereign had never failed. His adverse criticism was
seldom malicious, and was almost always animated by a desire that the
Sovereign should never fall below the standard of _noblesse oblige_.
The days of resentment against the Queen's prolonged seclusion had long
passed. She had ceased to be "the Royal Recluse," and was unsparing of
herself in the discharge of her duties up to within a few weeks of her
death. When she spoke in one of her messages of "her beloved people,"
there could be no question of her sincerity, or of the devotion with
which her love was returned.
As Mr. Balfour said significantly of her: "Even those who loved not
England loved her," and in later years those who came to scoff at her
memory remained to praise:--
THE QUEEN
Born May 24, 1819. Died January 22, 1901.
The tears we disallow to lesser ill
Here is no shame for English eyes to shed,
Because the noblest heart of all is still--
Because the Queen lies dead.
Grief asks for words, yet silent grief were well;
Vain is desire, as passionate prayer was vain;
Not all our love can bring, by any spell,
Breath to those lips again.
Ah! had but Death forgone his royal claim,
Demanding ransom, life for life the price,
How loyalty had leaped to kiss the flame
Of such a sacrifice!
God knows, in many a need this thing has been--
Light hearts for her have dared the desolate grave;
From other hurt their blood has saved the Queen,
From Death it could not save.
And of the dregs to drink from sorrow's cup
This is most bitter, that with life's release
She might not leave her children folded up
Between the wings of Peace.
Yet, for a solace in that darkest hour,
When even Kings have found themselves alone,
Over a people's love she kept her power
Firm as her fathers' throne.
[Sidenote: _Candid Friends and Hostile Critics_]
The "Khaki" election of the previous autumn, at which the Government
had appealed to the country to decide the issue of fighting the war to
a finish, had resulted in the return of the Unionists by a majority of
134, but did not abate the activities of the "Stop the War" party. They
were stimulated to further and more vehement protests by the policy of
the Concentration Camps, and the loss of life through epidemics caused
by the compulsory herding together of those who were interned. Between
the denunciations of British "brutalities" by the German Press and the
talk of "hecatombs of slaughtered babes" by British Liberals--between
"candid friends" and hostile critics--there was not much to choose.
_Punch_ invoked the shade of Bismarck to rebuke the excesses of the
German journalists; he ridiculed Miss Emily Hobhouse's descriptions of
Concentration Camp horrors by giving a list of the luxuries which were
not provided there--hairpins, curling-tongs, etc.--and in a cartoon at
the close of the year represented the "Stop the War" group as making
such a noise that Peace's voice could not be heard. Cleavage was shown
in the ranks of the Opposition, and _Punch_ did not fail to emphasize
the divergences between Mr. Asquith and the Imperialist Liberals on the
one side, and "C.-B." and Sir William Harcourt on the other. General
Baden-Powell arrived in England in July, and _Punch's_ greeting aptly
describes his mood and that of the man in the street:--
Time has flown; but not forgotten is the tale of Mafeking!
Who that lived that Day in London could forget its echoing ring?
How the Town broke into bunting, Piccadilly to Mile End!
How each man for joy saluted every other man as friend!
How we crowded to the city in an orgy of delight,
Tumbled out of bed for gladness, waving Union Jacks all night!
Even if we overdid it after deadening suspense,
Better this than anti-British Queen's Hall windbags' insolence!
Though we later coined a playful word, our soberer sense to show,
I would rather "maffick" daily than abet a treacherous foe!
In the controversies that arose over the treatment of various British
generals, I may note that _Punch_ supported the motion for an inquiry
into the circumstances under which General Colvile was deprived of his
command, which was negatived in the House by 262 votes to 248. Over
the still more thorny question of General Buller's conduct of the
Natal campaign he preserved an impartial attitude, while implying that
the general would not exploit his grievance for political purposes.
Early in the war _Punch_ paid a rather left-handed compliment to the
war correspondents; they are represented as welcoming war because it
brought them remunerative employment. In the autumn of 1901 we find him
pressing their claims for war medals, and observing that the Press had
been shut out but not shut up.
The war, he also notes on the authority of a daily paper, had produced
more poets than any similar crisis in English history. A more striking
parallel with recent war-products is to be found in _Punch's_ review
of the depression, discontent and decline of trade which it had begun
to cause before hostilities ceased. This is clearly shown in July,
1901, in the Preface to Vol. cxxi, where _Punch_ rebukes John Bull,
no longer in his Mark Tapley vein, for listening to pessimists, and
encouraging a seditious and pernicious Press. In the opening stages
of the war _Punch_ had been none too friendly to Lord Methuen, but he
was righteously indignant at the "Ghoul-like ecstasy" of the Irish
Members who cheered the news of the defeat and capture of that gallant
soldier in the spring of 1902. The end of the war came in June, and is
chronicled in _Punch's_ "Cease Fire" cartoon. The happiest incident
of the surrender was the speech made by Lord Kitchener to the Boer
delegates at Vereeniging when he said that "if he had been one of them,
he would have been proud to have done so well in the field as they had
done." _Punch_ did well to record it, for it reflected the national
respect felt for a stubborn foe. For confirmation we need only turn
to the laconic entry in the _National Register_ for August 16, 1902:
"The Boer generals, Botha, De Wet and Delarey ... proceeded to London,
and had an enthusiastic popular reception." Subsequent events have
justified the somewhat complacent remark attributed to John Bull in the
cartoon two months later, _à propos_ of the grant of £3,000,000 to the
Transvaal, and the Boers' "Appeal to the Civilized World": "Look here,
my friend, stick that up, if you like; but I think you'll find that _I_
talk less than the others and give more."
[Sidenote: _Lord Kitchener's Return_]
Lord Kitchener had returned in July, and _Punch's_ welcome ends on a
prophetic note:--
You're a worker from of old,
K. of K.
Pomps and pæans leave you cold,
K. of K.
You would like to land in mufti,
You would hurry down the dock
Not in trappings, plumed and tufty,
But in checks and billycock!
And you haven't, now It's over,
Come to stay;
Nor to lie at length in clover,
But to change your train for Dover,
K. of K.
For, although the work's appalling
Which should have you here at hand,
Yet you've heard the East a-calling
Out of India's coral strand;
And, as soon as time and place
Let our feelings find release,
And we've called you, to your face,
First in War and first in Peace;--
Thither where the Empire needs you,
K. of K.,
And your own "Ubique" leads you,
Lies your way!
Mr. Roosevelt had succeeded to the Presidency of the United States on
the assassination of Mr. McKinley, and _Punch_, after condoling with
Columbia, saluted the "Rough-Rider."
Our closer relations with Japan and their effect on Russia are
symbolized in the cartoon in which she remarks as a _tertia_ anything
but _gaudens_: "H'm--I don't like these confidences." In Europe the
subject that provoked _Punch's_ closest attention was the treatment
of the Poles by Germany. There is an amusing story in "Charivaria,"
probably apocryphal, but not beyond the possibilities of Prussian
pedantry:--
Fifty Prussian schoolgirls have been arrested at Gnesen on a charge of
high treason, and the police are said to have their eyes on several
Kindergartens, where it is reported that the children have been
playing "I'm the king of the Castle" and other games suggestive of
Majestätsbeleidigung.
But the whole essence of "Prussification" is summed up in the last
quatrain of a brilliant adaptation of the "Pied Piper of Hamelin" to
the situation in Posen:--
You can take a Pole, as I understand,
And play on his nerves with a German Band;
But you can't convert his natural temper, or
Get him to jig for a German Emperor.
Lord Salisbury had resigned in the summer of 1902, and Mr. Balfour had
succeeded to the Premiership. It was not exactly a case of "Amurath
to Amurath," but with nephew succeeding to uncle, and the presence of
another nephew and a son-in-law in the Cabinet, there was some ground
for the once familiar gibes against the "Hotel Cecil." _Punch_ was
not unfriendly to the new Premier, and applauded his handling of the
negotiations initiated by Germany to secure a British subsidy to the
German-controlled Baghdad railway. In "The Trap that Failed," the
British Lion "doesn't like the look of it and resolves to go round the
other way"; and the verses (after Omar Khayyám) indicate the surprise
of "the Potter of Potsdam" at the unexpected firmness of Mr. Balfour.
The gradual improvement of our relations with other foreign Powers is
symbolized in "The Chain of Friendship," showing King Edward joining
in a dance with France, Italy and Portugal; while the strengthening
of the Anglo-French _Entente_ is illustrated in the cartoon in which
King Edward, presenting the British Lion, says to the French President:
"See, M. Loubet, he offers you his paw." An element of reserve,
however, is shown in a dialogue in French, mildly satirizing the new
Anglomania; and in the burlesque sketch foreshadowing the ludicrous
and disastrous influence on both countries of the _Entente_--e.g. the
re-introduction of the duel on the initiative of the _Daily Mail_; the
presentation of Waterloo Station to the French and, as a set-off, the
presentation of the Keys of Calais to the Lord Mayor of London by the
Paris Municipal Council. To turn from gay to grave, this was the year
of the assassination of the King and Queen of Serbia, recorded in the
cartoon of "Murder as the King Maker."
[Sidenote: _Ireland, Army Reform, and India_]
Home politics fill a larger space in 1903 in _Punch's_ pages than
for some years previously. Remedial legislation in Ireland inspires
the cartoon of Mr. Balfour as St. Patrick--a saint invaluable to the
harassed cartoonist--driving out the snakes of sedition. The basis
of Mr. Wyndham's Land Purchase Act is well shown in the cartoon
illustrating the financial relations of the two countries. Tenant and
landlord both present money-boxes labelled "Land Purchase" to John
Bull, asking him to "put a thrifle in them"; John Bull scratches his
head, but he pays all the same. The difficulties of Mr. Brodrick in
securing national support for Army Reform are set forth in the verses
on "The Unhappy Warrior" (after Wordsworth), and the cartoon "Ready,
aye unready," with John Bull asleep on sentry duty--_à propos_ of the
Report of the Royal Commission on the South African war. A little
later, John Bull's short memory is satirized in his protest against
the size of his new watch-dog. Forgetting that he had clamoured for
increase, he now declares that he cannot afford him.
At the opening of the year _Punch_ had lavishly chronicled the glories
of the Delhi Durbar. "The Pilgrims to the East" included three members
of his staff, who did justice to the occasion both with pen and pencil,
and Sambourne's fine cartoon, "_Vivat Imperator_," forms an instructive
pendant and palinode to _Punch's_ anti-imperialist misgivings of 1876,
when he regarded the assumption of the new title as a piece of shoddy
Disraelian Orientalism.
Lord Salisbury's death in 1903 removed a great figure, whose prestige
has grown with the knowledge available in later years. We have learned
to revise the old view of his political stature as compared with
that of Lord Beaconsfield, and to reject the often-quoted but quite
erroneous saying attributed to Bismarck that he was "a lath painted
to resemble iron." _Punch's_ memorial tribute admits that he "nothing
common did or mean":--
When Lord Salisbury, resigning the Premiership, practically retired
from public life, a gap was made in the House of Lords no living
man might fill. Only once has he returned to the scene of memorable
labour. He came with the rest of the cloaked Peers to pay homage to
King Edward the Seventh when first he seated himself on the throne
which he had long regarded from the point of view of the Cross
Benches. There was hope that the ex-Premier would, from time to time,
still give the House and the country the advantage of his sagacious
counsel, the pleasure of listening to his brilliant speech. But, like
the other tall man in another chair, "his heart was worn with work."
He was sick of the sometimes mean rivalry of political life, and felt
he had earned his leisure.
In a manner unique Lord Salisbury had the faculty of standing apart
from his fellow men, regarding them and appraising them as if he
himself did not belong to the _genus_. It was as if a man from Mars
had visited our planet, studying its pygmy population with amused,
on the whole scornful interest. With one exception he was the only
statesman who never bent the knee to the Baal known in political
chatter as The Man in the Street. The exception is, of course, the
Duke of Devonshire, who had further kinship with the Marquis in
respect of absolute freedom from desire to get anything for himself
out of the game of politics. Intellectually and morally--this
latter more precious because more rare--Lord Salisbury uplifted and
maintained at high level the standard of English public life. He was
a man whom foreigners, equally with his own countrymen, unreservedly
trusted, because of a personal quality worth the whole armoury of
diplomacy.
With his withdrawal from the stage, the House of Lords as a debating
assembly lost its chief attraction. It was worth sitting through a
dreary couple of hours for the chance reward of hearing him speak.
Whilst others discoursed he sat impassive, taking no note, making no
sign of hearing, or caring about, what the noble lord on his legs said
or left unspoken. Only a curious rapid movement of the crossed leg
betokened cogitation, betrayed closest attention, and the framing of
some sentences that would presently play about the adversary's head
like forked lightning.
[Sidenote: _The Fiscal Fray_]
An event of greater immediate interest which coincided with the passing
of Lord Salisbury was the resignation of Mr. Chamberlain. On his return
from a strenuous and exhausting tour in South Africa, he had thrown
himself with immense energy into the Tariff Reform campaign, and
withdrew from the Cabinet in order to devote his entire energies to the
prosecution of the cause. _Punch's_ pages throughout the second half
of 1903 furnish a lively chronicle of the progress of Mr. Chamberlain's
crusade and the wonderful egg-dance of Mr. Balfour. Early in September
the situation is portrayed in "The Parting of the Ways." Mr. Balfour,
"long troubled by philosophic doubt," is shown on the road with a
knapsack labelled "Treasury Returns" and "Board of Trade Returns,"
looking at a sign-post, one arm pointing to Chatsworth, the other to
Highbury, and saying: "Well, now, I suppose I must really make up my
mind."
A week later we have the Fiscal Hamlet in "The Unready Reckoner."
Prince Arthur remarks: "O dear Ophelia, I am ill at these numbers; I
have not the art to reckon," while on the wall hangs a portrait of Mr.
Chamberlain as Ophelia. In November, under the heading "An Eye for
Effect," _Punch_ exhibits "Foreign Competition" as a Guy on a barrow,
with Mr. Chamberlain in charge and conversing with Mr. Balfour:--
ARTHUR: "Ain't you made 'im too 'orrible?"
JOE: "No fear! You _can't_ make 'em too 'orrible!"
Simultaneously, _Punch_ published a burlesque on the _Daily Mail's_
canvass, with expressions of opinion from Henry James, Rudyard Kipling
and Mr. A. B. Walkley. The _Daily Express_, not to be outdone, offered
a prize of £25 to the owner of the first parrot taught to speak
distinctly the phrase: "Your food will cost you more." The "folly of
the fray" was not overlooked, but _Punch_ did not misread its essential
significance in his cartoon of Mr. Chamberlain in the guise of the
political Ancient Mariner who had slain the albatross of Conservative
unity.
Foreign politics once more dominated the scene in 1904, when the
legacy of friction, bequeathed by Russia's intervention at the close
of the Chino-Japanese war and her Manchurian policy after the "Boxer"
outbreak, bore its inevitable fruit in the Russo-Japanese war. The
sympathy of England with Japan is reflected in the pages of _Punch_.
He rebuked the hissing of Russian performers at a performance in the
provinces; but satirized the indignation generally expressed in Russia
that Japan should have begun hostilities without a formal declaration,
or, as _Punch_ put it, without consulting Russia as to whether the date
was convenient to her. The fervent patriotism of the Japanese army is
cordially applauded: John Bull is shown in a mood of envy, thinking he
must try to introduce it at home. The unfortunate Dogger Bank incident,
when Admiral Rozhdestvensky's fleet, on their way out to the Far East,
fired on a fleet of British trawlers, aroused great indignation, mixed
with bitter satire of Russian nerves and thrasonical satisfaction.
_Punch_ published a scarifying parody of Campbell's "Battle of the
Baltic" on this "famous victory" over a "hostile trawling fleet"
engaged in "gutting plaice." Later on in "Admirals All" there is an
equally sarcastic comment on the Report of the North Sea Court of
Inquiry, at which the Russians were exculpated by an Austrian Admiral.
Nor was _Punch's_ indignation expressed against Russia alone. The
acceptance of Russian orders by British coal exporters is chastised in
a cartoon with the legend as under:--
Old King Coal
Was a sordid old soul,
And a sordid old soul was he:
He sold to the Russ,
And he didn't care a cuss,
And the Baltic fleet crossed the sea.
On the fall of Port Arthur, however, _Punch_ did not forget to
acknowledge the heroism of the defence: here, at least, "the honour
of the Russian eagle was untarnished." The war ended in May, 1905,
but before its close Russian internal unrest had become menacing and
hampered the prosecution of hostilities. _Punch_ read the signs of the
times truly in his cartoon of Death as the Czar of all the Russias,
with a figure holding a "Petition" lying slain at his feet; and again
in his rather cruel verses to "The Little Father":--
THE LITTLE FATHER
Nichol, Nichol, little Czar,
How I wonder where you are!
You who thought it best to fly,
Being so afraid to die.
Now the sullen crowds are gone,
Now there's nought to fire upon;
Sweet your sleigh bells ring afar,
Tinkle, tinkle, little Czar.
Little Czar, with soul so small,
How are you a Czar at all?
Yours had been a happier lot
In some peasant's humble cot.
Yet to you was given a day
With a noble part to play,
As an Emperor and a Man;
When it came--"then Nicky ran."
Little Czar, beware the hour
When the people strikes at Power;
Soul and body held in thrall,
They are human after all.
Thrones that reek of blood and tears
Fall before the avenging years.
While you watch your sinking star,
Tremble, tremble, little Czar!
[Illustration: THE CZAR OF ALL THE RUSSIAS]
The contrasted outlook in Russia and Japan is shown in "Peace and
After"--gloom and storm in the one country, general rejoicing in
the other. The signing of the Peace in October brought mutiny and
insurrection in Russia, repressed for the moment by grape-shot and
concessions. _Punch_ distrusted the former method, and warned the Tsar
through the mouth of Louis XVI: "Side with the people, Sire, while
there is yet time. _I_ was too late." The instalment of constitutional
government granted was shorn of its grace by the antecedent display
of ruthlessness. _Punch_ typified this situation in his cartoon of
the Tsar armed with a sword and leaning on a cannon, with corpses
strewn around, and saying: "Now I think the way is clear for universal
suffrage." But _Punch_ was premature in saluting the first Duma--opened
by the Tsar in person in May, 1906--as the Infant Hercules strangling
the twin snakes of Bureaucracy and Despotism. It was the Duma which was
strangled by these forces, of which the first was the more potent and
malign.
[Sidenote: _Belgium and Germany_]
Another foreign monarch who came in for severe criticism in these
years was King Leopold II of the Belgians. Quite recently he had been
treated by _Punch_ with a benevolence that bordered on fulsomeness. But
1904 was the year of the "Congo Atrocities," and _Punch_, in a cartoon
modelled on the ancient Egyptian lines, compared him with the Pharaoh
Rameses II whose scribes counted over the hands cut from his vanquished
enemies. This was suggested by the stories of the similar treatment of
the natives in the rubber plantations vouched for by the British Consul
at Boma. The value of this evidence has since been impaired by the fact
that the Consul in question was none other than Roger Casement. From
Belgium to Germany the transition is easy. In the last two years of
the Unionist administration, German aggressiveness is a constant theme
of comment, mainly inspired by misgiving, occasionally enlivened by
burlesque belittlement of scaremongers. To the latter category belongs
the forecast, at the close of 1904, of the invasion of London, seized
during a week-end exodus of its inhabitants. Nor should we fail to
note the series of appreciative articles on life in Berlin in 1905, in
which "Tom the Tourist" finds the German capital "one of the liveliest,
pleasantest and handsomest of cities," and descants on its good beer,
pleasant company, genial hospitality, and the absence of any sign of
hatred of the British. The writer even goes so far as to compare the
Sieges-Allée favourably with some of the statuary of London. But a
different note is struck in the lines on the vicarious patriotism of
those who objected to conscription; in the references to the inadequacy
of our coast defences; in the satisfaction expressed in the appointment
of Sir John Fisher as First Sea Lord, and the improvement in naval
gunnery; and in the satire directed against the new German Chancellor,
Count von Bülow, for his cynical "_blague_." As "_Der Taubadler_," he
reproves President Roosevelt for Jingoism, and declares:--
Our passion for ruling the brine
Is based on a single and pure design--
To serve as a sort of Marine Police,
Patrons of Universal Peace.
Lord Roberts's warning speech at the London Chamber of Commerce in the
late summer of 1902 had prompted the cartoon "The Call to Arms." John
Bull, aroused from slumber and only half-awake, asks "What's wrong?"
Lord Roberts, the warning warder, replies: "You are absolutely unfitted
and unprepared for war!" whereon John Bull rejoins drowsily: "Am I?
You _do_ surprise me," and goes to bed again. Growing distrust of the
Kaiser is shown in the cartoon in which he figures as "The Sower of
Tares" after Millais's picture, while _Punch_ simultaneously manifests
his satisfaction at the strengthening of the Anglo-French _Entente_.
The British working man, if _Punch_ is to be believed, disliked all
foreigners, but his pet aversion was "them blooming Germans." There
was, at any rate, a legitimate grievance in the fact that fifty-nine
foreign pilots were employed on our coasts, whereas abroad our ships
were compelled to take native pilots; and the Nelson Centenary on
October 21, 1905, impelled _Punch_, in an address to the hero of
Trafalgar, to deplore the decay of national patriotism in a vein of
pessimism happily falsified ten years later:--
Much you would have to marvel at
Could you return this autumn-tide;
You'd find the Fleet--thank God for that--
Staunch and alert as when you died;
But, elsewhere, few to play your part,
Ready at need and ripe for action;
The rest--in idle ease of heart
Smiling an unctuous satisfaction.
I doubt if you could well endure
These new ideals (so changed we are),
Undreamed, Horatio, in your
Philosophy of Trafalgar;
And, should you still "expect" to see
The standard reached which you erected,
Nothing just now would seem to be
So certain as the unexpected.
[Illustration: THE CALL TO ARMS!
JOHN BULL (aroused from slumber and only half awake): "What's
wrong?"
LORD ROBERTS (the warning Warder): "You are absolutely
unfitted and unprepared for war!"
JOHN BULL (drowsily): "Am I? You _do_ surprise me!" (_Goes to
bed again._)
(Vide speech by Lord Roberts at meeting of London Chamber of Commerce,
Mansion House.)]
The "decline and fall" of the Unionist administration are symbolized
and explained in two cartoons in the late summer of 1905. In one Mr.
Balfour is seen, a lonely swimmer, wallowing in the sea of Public
Opinion. A voice from the Tug (Tory Organization) hails him, urging him
to keep afloat and he'll "drift in to the shore" (Session 1906). He
replies that he "can't do much against a tide like this." The sources
of weakness are even better diagnosed in the cartoon of August 30,
"Shelved," showing the group of statesmen who had resigned--the Duke of
Devonshire, Mr. Ritchie, Lord Balfour of Burleigh, Lord George Hamilton
and Mr. George Wyndham.
The rout of the Government at the General Election of 1906 was a
veritable _débâcle_. Liberal candidates were returned who never got
in before or after: there is a story of one so overwhelmed by his
wholly unexpected success that he fainted on the declaration of the
poll. Ministers went down like ninepins, and on the meeting of the new
Parliament _Punch_ descants on the disappearance of the "old familiar
faces"--Mr. Arthur Balfour and his brother Gerald, Alfred Lyttelton and
St. John Brodrick, Bonar Law, Sir John Gorst, Sir Albert Rollit, Sir W.
Hart Dyke, Gibson Bowles, and, "saddest fate of all and most lamented,"
Mr. Henry Chaplin. The emergence of a new, formidable, but uncertain
factor was at once recognized in the cartoon in which John Bull looks
over the wall at a bull labelled Labour Vote. The Trade Disputes Bill,
the first and most notable concession to the demands of Trade Unionism,
is discussed in the next section.
[Illustration: AN UNDER-RATED MONSTER
BRITANNIA: "That's a nasty-looking object, Mr. Boatman!"
LORD TW-DM-TH: "Bless your 'eart, mum, 'e won't 'urt you. I've
been here, man an' boy, for the last six months, an' we don't take no
account o' them things!"]
_Punch_ was more preoccupied with Lord Haldane's new army scheme,
and when the War Minister, in introducing it, declared that the
country would not be "dragooned into conscription," interpreted his
statement "in other and less conventional terms" as indicating a
conviction that "it is the inalienable right of the free-born British
citizen to decline to lift a finger in his country's defence." Lord
Haldane's proposals for retrenchment are symbolized in his efforts to
make big toy soldiers fit his box, instead of making the box fit the
soldiers. Wasters and loafers who had cheered "Bobs" on his return
from South Africa are shown expressing indignation at his wanting to
enforce universal military service. _Punch's_ reluctant admission
of our national lethargy finds vent in a dialogue emphasizing the
predominance of the _Panem et Circenses_ spirit--devotion to the Big
Loaf and spectacular games--coupled with a loss of our supremacy in
games. The pageant mania became acute in 1907, when _Punch_ satirically
asks, "Can you cite any other country where it is impossible to walk
out of doors without colliding with an historical pageant?"
Lord Haldane's visit to Germany in 1906 is burlesqued in a diary
professing to reveal his paramount interest in German philosophy and
literature; and a picture, in which he appears in a _Pickelhaube_,
expresses the misgivings of two British soldiers who had overheard
him "talking to himself in German--something horrible." This attitude
of critical distrust is maintained throughout the next four years. In
March, 1908, the new gun designed for the Territorial Force prompts a
dialogue between the War Minister and Field-Marshal _Punch_:--
MR. HALDANE: "In the event of invasion, I shall depend
upon my brave Territorial force to manipulate this magnificent and
complicated weapon."
F.-M. _Punch_: "Going to give them any training?"
MR. H.: "Oh, perhaps a fortnight or so a year."
F.-M. _Punch_: "Ah! Then they'll need to be pretty brave, won't they?"
Further satire is expended in August of the same year on "A Skeleton
Army; or, The Charge of the Very Light Brigade":--
HALDANE (at Cavalry Manoeuvres): "You see those three men?
Well, they're pretending to be one hundred. Isn't that imaginative?"
MR. _Punch_: "Realistic, you mean. That's about what it will
come to with us in real warfare."
[Illustration: HISTORY DEFEATS ITSELF
SHADE OF PAUL KRÜGER: "What! Botha _Premier_? Well, these
English _do_ 'stagger humanity'!"]
_Punch_ was not happy about our Navy either, and in 1906 he had rallied
Lord Tweedmouth, then at the Admiralty, for reassuring Britannia
against the German menace. It was no use to say, "We don't take no
account of them things"; the monster was there, and could not be
belittled. By the end of the year, however, _Punch's_ complacency
was restored by the advance in our naval gunnery, and Britannia is
seen proudly showing the impressive tabulated results of our big gun
practice. The Germans are the only modern people who have a single word
to express delight in the misfortunes of others--_Schadenfreude_. It
is not a noble sentiment, but a suspicion of it mingles with _Punch's_
comments on Germany's internal troubles. In 1878 he had shown Bismarck
squeezing down the Socialist Jack-in-the-Box, and nearly thirty years
later repeats the formula at the expense of Count von Bülow; but the
Socialist Jack-in-the-Box was now a much more formidable figure: it was
"a bigger task for a smaller man."
The twenty-fifth anniversary of the Triple Alliance fell in 1907, and
_Punch_ indicated that Italy's allegiance was already wearing thin.
In performing the trio "We are a happy Family," Austria's "We are" is
marked _piano_, and that of Italy _dubioso_.
In the domain of high politics, Imperial and International, 1907 was
marked by two notable events. The grant of autonomy to the Transvaal
undoubtedly contained an element of risk, but the sequel showed
that magnanimity was the best policy. General Botha's Premiership
proved a symbol of reconciliation destined in time to bear "rare
and refreshing fruit," and _Punch_ was fairly entitled to invoke
the reluctant testimony of Krüger's shade: "What! Botha _Premier_?
Well, these English _do_ 'stagger humanity'!" Secondly, there was
the Hague Conference, over which _Punch_ maintained his attitude of
scepticism, on the ground that each Power was unwilling to lead the
way in disarmament. In his cartoon of the various nations at the door
of the Conference everybody says, "After you, Sir," to everybody else.
The Government's extensive programme of legislation for the following
session is shown in the picture of "C.-B." at the piano accompanying
the Infant Prodigy, 1908. The programme includes the "Twilight of the
Lords," "_Etudes Pacifiques_"; "_Danse anti-Bacchanale_" and "Irish
Rhapsody" with Campobello, McKenna, Asquith and Birrell as soloists.
The campaign against the Lords, opened at Edinburgh by "C.-B." in
October, 1907, suggested the cartoon of the "Fiery Cross" with the
Premier as a kilted warrior shouting, "Doon wi' the Lords!" while
the accompanying verses, in the ballad manner of Scott, describe
the passing on of the fiery cross by Lord Crewe, John Morley, Mr.
Sinclair (now Lord Pentland), Lord Tweedmouth, Mr. Runciman, and "Lloyd
McGeorge."
[Sidenote: _Naval Misgivings_]
The mention of Lord Tweedmouth reminds one that the question of our
naval supremacy had entered on a new phase. As _Punch_ put it in his
"Charivaria" in November, 1907, "There seems to be a difference of
opinion between the Prince of Wales and Sir John Fisher. Some little
time ago His Royal Highness, speaking at the Guildhall, cried: 'Wake
up, England!' Sir John, speaking in the same place, has now issued the
advice: 'Sleep quietly in your beds.'"
In the spring of 1908 occurred the awkward incident of the Kaiser's
letter to Lord Tweedmouth on Naval Retrenchment. _Punch_, in his
"Essence of Parliament," benevolently minimizes the First Lord's
indiscretion, which, along with other causes, led to his withdrawal
from the Admiralty; at the same time there appeared some highly
ironical reflections on the attitude of the advocates of the
Two-Power-Standard. In an ingenious adaptation of Tennyson's ballad of
"The Revenge," Sir Thomas Howard refuses to fight because he is one
ship short of the Two-Power-Standard.
In early Victorian days the Duke of Wellington was commonly alluded to
as "the Duke" _par excellence_. In the opening years of the present
century, in political circles at any rate, when people spoke of "the
Duke" they always meant the Duke of Devonshire, and for reasons which
are tersely and correctly given in _Punch's_ brief memorial verses when
he died in March, 1908:--
If to have held his way with steadfast will,
Unspoiled of Fortune, deaf to praise or blame,
Asking no favour but to follow still
The patriot's single aim:--
If, in contempt of other pride of race,
By honesty that chose the nobler part,
Careless of fame's reward, to win a place
Near to the common heart:--
If these be virtues large, heroic, rare,
Then is it well with him, the dead, to-day,
Who leaves a public record clean and fair,
That Time shall not gainsay.
The tribute is one which, we think, would have appealed to the dead
statesman, a man of few words, but who in the words of another Duke,
the Duke of Argyll, was "firm as the rock, and clear as the crystal
that adorns the rock."
A few weeks later Sir Henry Campbell-Bannerman, broken in health,
resigned the Premiership, dying so soon afterwards that he virtually
died in harness. _Punch_ did not overstate things in describing his
death as "a common grief" to Liberals and Unionists, for he had
outlived the obloquy of party bitterness and revealed as Premier
qualities which his successor, Mr. Asquith, fittingly described when
he spoke of him as "our revered and trusted chief." By a strange and
happy irony of fate, the statesman who had opposed the Boer war was
responsible for the policy of reconciliation which might have been much
harder if that war had not been waged.
Germany loomed large on the political horizon in 1908. This was the
year of Mr. Lloyd George's visit to inquire into the working of the
scheme of national insurance, a visit which _Punch_ treated with
undisguised irony as a belated afterthought. It was also the year of
the Kaiser's famous interview, published in the _Daily Telegraph_, in
which he claimed credit for magnanimity to England during the Boer war,
with the result of annoying his Chancellor and having to consent to a
revision of his conception of the Imperial prerogative. _Punch's_ open
letter to "The Great Misunderstood" exhibits considerable scepticism of
his friendliness, and a set of verses, in the same spirit, are inspired
by the activities of the German Women's Navy League. An English M.P.
had been exhibiting a toy model of a German gunboat used by this
organization as a collecting box, and it was alleged that these toys
were handed about in German schools with the request: "Give us your
pence, so that we can thrash the English."
[Sidenote: _The Kaiser's Soliloquy_]
The Kaiser's fiftieth birthday is commemorated in a "Soliloquy in
Berlin," in which the Emperor boasts of having swept aside Bismarck
and repressed the "too clamorous people" by police, prison or exile,
and defends his impulsive loquacity against his critics. The King must
know best, and "while all the discontented loose their tongues and rave
against him, shall the King be still?" Moreover, he claims to have kept
the world from war:--
And I have kept the peace. Was that well done?
I know not, but I know I kept the peace,
I, whose blood boiled to hear the clash of swords,
At whose command a million men would spring
Obedient to the conflict; I, whose soul
was made for glorious battle, who could lead
Ten thousand thundering horsemen to the charge,
Have kept the peace, while others urged to war.
[Illustration: "MUMMY, WHAT'S THAT MAN FOR?"]
Simultaneously _Punch_ illustrates the growing patriotic fervour at
home. Golfers are becoming shy of being detected on their way to or
from the links by men in uniform. And _Punch_ praises _An Englishman's
Home_ as a "wonderful play," in which the case for national service
is presented "with rare tact, and void of offence even to the most
violent anti-militarist." Indeed, he goes so far as to admit that
the author's advocacy is impaired by his making the vulgar cheerful
young "slacker" delightfully human, while the good young patriot is
too stagey and talkative. German aggressiveness is illustrated in
the cartoon showing the German sailor adopting our "Jingo" song, the
copyright having expired. Editorially, though obliquely, _Punch_
deplores the subservience of vital questions of foreign policy to party
questions, and gives special praise to Sir Edward Grey. "Prenderby,"
who impersonates a detached view, pleads for a Coalition Cabinet--a
Ministry of all the patriots. In the spring of 1909 Mr. Asquith
figures as the Night Watchman who cries "All's well," but John Bull
from his window replies: "So you say. All the same, I shall sit up
for a bit." This was the time of the cry for more _Dreadnoughts_: "We
want Eight and we won't wait." The vote of censure on the Government
for their inadequate naval preparations was rejected by 353 votes to
135, and _Punch_ satirized the Labour Party's idea of battleships in
a pictorial representation of H.M.S. _Inoffensive_, _Innocuous_, etc.
It is curious to find in another of _Punch's_ editorial dialogues one
of the speakers constantly harping on what might happen in 1914 when
_Dreadnoughts_ would be obsolete; while the happy-go-lucky attitude of
the average subaltern towards a possible war is expressed in the wish
attributed to one of them: "Let's hope it will come between the polo
and the huntin'." Lord Roberts's National Service Bill was thrown out
in the Lords in July by a narrow majority. _Punch's_ artist is most
frankly honorific to Lord Roberts; but the summary of the debate given
by his Parliamentary representative is not even non-committal, for it
contrives to disparage Lord Milner while emphasizing the opposition of
the Duke of Northumberland and the caution of Lord Lansdowne.
[Sidenote: _Mr. Birrell as Chief Secretary_]
At the close of the year the impenitence of the Belgian administrators
of the Congo is held up to execration in the cartoon of the
slave-driver outside the European Hall of Deliberation, armed with a
whip, and saying, "I'm all right. They're still talking"; while a
naked slave lies helpless and prostrate in the foreground.
After a brief and ineffectual tenure of office at the Board of
Education, Mr. Birrell had, whether out of heroic self-sacrifice
or ignorance, accepted the most thankless and arduous of all
portfolios--that of the Irish Chief Secretaryship. For the sequel, one
has to turn to the Report of the Hardinge Committee of Inquiry into the
Dublin revolution of Easter, 1916--one of the most lacerating public
documents ever devoted to the dissection of Ministerial incompetence.
But in 1909 there was, no doubt, much that appealed to _Punch_ in the
notion of setting a professional humorist to govern a quick-witted
people. There never was a greater mistake. Much was and is forgiven to
a Minister who amuses the House, but the legacy of hatred, faithfully
cherished by those who forgot nothing but benefits received, was not
to be cancelled by epigrams which provoked the facile laughter of St.
Stephen's. There was, however, a probably quite unintended though extra
appropriateness in the title of the verses to him as "The Right Man in
the Wrong Place," for the chief ground of complaint against the Chief
Secretary was that he was conspicuous by his absence from Ireland at
all critical moments, and eclipsed the "Absentee landlords" at their
own game. In 1909 _Punch_ contented himself with showing Mr. Birrell
as a Lecturer on Old Age Pensions as a means of allaying discontent,
and reducing the method to absurdity. The boon was naturally popular,
since, as _Punch_ noted on good authority, it had been claimed and
received by more than 50,000 people not qualified under the Act.
[Illustration: THE CONSTITUTION IN THE MELTING POT
THE THREE WITCHES: "Double, double, toil and trouble!"
_Macbeth_, act IV, scene 1.
]
[Sidenote: _Wait and See_]
In 1910 two general elections, fought on questions of internal policy,
and the conflict over the Parliament Bill diverted attention from
foreign politics. Lord Rosebery's scheme for the reform of the Upper
Chamber is treated in light-hearted fashion in the cartoon of the
Selection Committee of the Peers' Royal Academy. Lord Curzon and Lord
Lansdowne criticize Lord Rosebery's "problem picture": Lord Halsbury
bluntly ejaculates, "Take it away." _Punch_, however, recognized the
serious intentions of the Government in "The Constitution in the
Melting Pot," where Mr. Winston Churchill, Mr. Asquith and Mr. Lloyd
George are the three witches bending over the cauldron. The Unionists
had gained some ground in the January elections, but not nearly enough;
in December, when party feeling ran much higher, they failed to improve
their position, in spite of the offer of a Referendum to determine the
question of Tariff Reform, and of their insistent warnings as to the
danger of single-chamber Government. _Punch_, with some reserves, was
decidedly opposed to the Government programme, and a hostile critic
alike of the platform exuberance of Mr. Lloyd George and the "wait and
see" policy of Mr. Asquith:--
Schemes are shattered, plots are changed,
Plans arranged and re-arranged!
Words are eaten; every day
Broken pledges thrown away;
Here the riddle--where the key?
Wait and see!
Does his wandering course reveal
Only love of Britain's weal?
Does he toil through heavy sand
Seeking how to keep his land
Clean and prosperous and free?
Wait and see!
Is it that he turns his eyes
To a goal that needs disguise?
Just a paltry party score,
Checked by some about him, more--
More particular than he?
Wait and see!
Is he one whose wavering mind
Lightly veers to every wind,
Hither pitched and thither tossed,
While the country pays the cost
Of his flaccid vertebræ?
Wait and see!
Be it not that he has sold
All the faith that men should hold
Sacred; that he walks his ways,
Flogged by those whom he obeys,
At whose word he bows the knee--
Wait and see!
Wait and see, and wait again:
But the country waits in vain.
Waits for order--finding none;
Sees but duty left undone.
* * *
What will Britain's verdict be?
Wait and see!
[Illustration: THE NEW JOHN BULL
After the proposed "Federalization" of the British Isles.]
[Illustration: THE CHANCE OF A LIFETIME
OUR MR. ASQUITH: "Five hundred coronets, dirt cheap! This line
of goods ought to make business a bit brisker, what?"
OUR MR. LLOYD GEORGE: "Not half; bound to go like hot cakes."]
[Illustration: "I SPY!"