Twice a week the favorite kept a drawing room. The preceding evening
she named the women whom she would willingly see, and the Sultan
gave the list of the men. The company always came richly dress'd.
The conversation was either general, or particular. When the amorous
history of the court fail'd of furnishing real diverting adventures,
stories were invented, and necessity sometimes compelled them to
run into bad tales; which were called a continuation of the Arabian
nights entertainments. The men had the privilege of saying all the
extravagant things that came into their heads, and the women that of
knotting, while they gave ear to them. At these meetings, the Sultan
and his favorite put themselves on a level with their subjects: their
presence gave no sort of check to whatever could amuse; and people
seldom found the time tedious. Mangogul had learned early in his life,
that pleasures are not to be found above the foot of the throne; and no
man descended from it with better grace, or knew how to put off majesty
more _à propos_.
While he was surveying the private lodge of the Senator Hippomanes,
Mirzoza waited for him in the rose-colour'd salon, with the youthful
Zaide, the chearful Leocris, the lively Serica, Amina and Benzaira,
the wives of two Emirs, Orphisa the prude, and Vetula the great
Seneschal's lady, temporal mother of all the Bramins. It was not
long before he appeared. He enter'd attended by count Hannetillon
and the chevalier Fadaes. Alciphenor an old rake, and his disciple
young Marmolin followed him; and two minutes after, arrived the Pacha
Grifgrif, the Aga Fortimbek, and the Selictar Velvet-Paw. These were
the most absolute _Petits-Maitres_ of the court. Mangogul call'd them
together designedly. Having heard a thousand stories of their gallant
exploits, he resolved to be informed in such a manner as might banish
all future doubt. "Well, gentlemen," says he to them, "ye whom nothing
escapes, that passes in the empire of gallantry, what news from thence?
how far are the Speaking Toys got."
"Sir," replied Alciphenor, "the racket they make encreases daily; and
if it continues, we shall soon not be able to hear ourselves. But
nothing is so diverting as the indiscretion of Zobeida's Toy. It has
given her husband a catalogue of her adventures." "And a prodigious
one," says Marmolin: "it mentions five aga's, twenty captains, almost
an entire company of janissaries, twelve Bramins: and they say that I
am named too, but that is a mere joke." "The best past of the affair
is," added Grifgrif, "that the affrighted husband ran away with his
fingers in his ears."
"This is quite horrible," said Mirzoza. "Yes, madam," interrupted
Fortimbek, "horrible, frightful, execrable." "More than all that, if
you please," replied the favorite, "to dishonor a woman upon hearsay."
"Madam, it is literally true, Marmolin has not added one word to the
story," says Velvet-Paw. "It is fact," says Grifgrif. "Good," says
Hannetillon, "there is an epigram already handed about concerning it,
and an epigram is not made for nothing." "But why should Marmolin
be safe from the prattle of the Toys? Cynara's Toy has insisted
on speaking in its turn, and to blend me with people, who do not
stake their all. But how to help that? The right thing is not, to
be disturbed at it," says Velvet-Paw. "You are right," answered
Hannetillon, and instantly fell to singing:
"Mon bonheur fut si grand, que j'ai peine à le croire."
My fortune was so great, that I can scarce believe it.
"Count," says Mangogul to Hannetillon, "then you have been particularly
acquainted with Cynara?"
"Sir," answered Velvet-Paw, "who doubts, it? He has walk'd with her
for more moons than one? they have been song'd; and all this would
have lasted to this day, if he had not at length discovered that she
was not handsome, and that she had a large mouth." "Allowed," replied
Hannetillon; "but that imperfection was ballanced by an uncommon
agreeableness."
"How long since this adventure?" ask'd the prude Orphisa. "Madam,"
replied Hannetillon, "its epoch is not present to my memory. I must
have recourse to the chronological tables of my good fortune. There
may be seen the day and minute: but 'tis a large volume, with which my
servants amuse themselves in the antichamber."
"Hold," says Alciphenor; "I recollect that it was precisely a year
after Grifgrif fell out with Madam la Seneschale. She has the memory
of an angel, and can tell you exactly."--"That nothing is more false
than your date," answered the Seneschal's lady gravely. "'Tis well
known that blockheads were never of my taste." "Yet, madam," replied
Alciphenor, "you will never persuade us, that Marmolin was excessively
wise, when he was conducted into your appartment by the back stairs,
whenever his highness summoned the Seneschal to council." "There can
be no greater extravagance in my opinion," added Velvet-Paw, "than to
enter into a woman's chamber by stealth, for nothing at all; for people
thought nothing more of his visits than what was really fact, and madam
was already in full enjoyment of that reputation of virtue, which she
has so well supported since that time."
"But that is an age ago," says Fadaes. "It was pretty much about that
same time that Zulica made a slip from the Selictar, who was her
humble servant, to take possession of Grifgrif, whom she drop'd six
months after; she is now got as far as Fortimbek. I am not sorry for
my friend's little stroke of good luck; I see her, I admire her, but
entirely without any pretensions."
"Yet Zulica," says the favorite, "is very amiable. She has wit, taste,
and something, I know not how, engaging in her countenance, which I
should prefer to charms." "I grant that, madam," answer'd Fadaes: "but
she is maigre, has no neck, and her thigh is so skinny, that it raises
one's pity."
"You are well acquainted with it, to be sure," added the Sultana. "Oh!
madam," replied Hannetillon, "you may guess that. I have visited Zulica
but seldom, and yet I know as much of that affair as Fadaes." "I can
easily believe you," says the favorite.
"But _à propos_, might one ask Grifgrif," says the Selictar, "if he
has been long in possession of Zirphila. There is what you may call a
pretty woman. She has an admirable shape." "And who doubts it!" added
Marmolin.
"How happy is the Selictar," continued Fadaes. "I give you Fadaes,"
interrupted the Selictar, "for the best provided gallant of the court.
To my knowledge he has the Visir's wife, the two prettiest actresses
of the opera, and an adorable _Grisette_, whom he keeps in his private
lodge." "And I," replied Fadaes, "would give up the Visir's wife,
the two actresses and the _Grisette_, for one glance from a certain
woman, with whom the Selictar is very well, and who has not the least
suspicion that the world knows it;" and then stepping up to Leocris,
says, "your blushes are ravishing.----"
"Hannetillon was a long time wavering," says Marmolin, "between Melissa
and Fatima, two charming women. One day he was for Melissa the fair,
the next for Fatima the nut-brown." "The poor man," continues Fadaes,
"was strangely embarassed: why did he not take them both?" "So he did,"
says Alciphenor.
Our _Petits-Maitres_ were, as you see, in a right cue not to stop
here, when Zobeida, Cynara, Zulica, Melissa, Fatima and Zirphila sent
in their names. This ill-timed circumstance disconcerted them for a
moment; but they soon recover'd from their ruffle, and fell on other
women, whom their detraction had hitherto spared, only because they had
not time to tear them to pieces.
Mirzoza, quite out of patience at their discourses, said: "Gentlemen,
considering the merit and probity in particular, which must needs be
allowed ye, it cannot be doubted but that you have enjoyed all the good
fortunes of which you boast. I must own nevertheless, that I would be
very glad to hear the Toys of these ladies on this head; and that I
would most heartily thank Brama, if he would deign to render justice to
truth by their mouths."
"That is to say," replies Hannetillon, "that madam would desire to hear
the same things twice over: well, to oblige her, we'll repeat them."
But Mangogul set about applying his ring in order of seniority: he
began by Madame la Seneschale, whose Toy cough'd three times, and
with a trembling and broken voice said: "To the great Seneschal I am
indebted for the first fruits of my pleasures: but I had not been his
property above six months, when a young Bramin gave my mistress to
understand, that a woman can do no injury to her husband, while she
thinks on him. I relished the moral, and thenceforward thought I might
with a safe conscience admit a senator, then a privy counsellor, then a
pontif, then one or two masters of Requests, then a musician"----"And
Marmolin?" says Fadaes.----"Marmolin," replies the Toy, "I know him
not, unless it be that young coxcomb, whom my lady ordered to be kick'd
out of her house, for some insolence, the particulars of which I have
forgot.----"
Cynara's Toy took up the discourse, and said: "Do you interrogate me
concerning Alciphenor, Fadaes, and Grifgrif? I have indeed been pretty
well served; but this is the first time that I ever heard these folks
named. However, I shall get some account of them from Amalek the Emir,
Telenor the Financier, or the Visir Abdiram, who know the whole world,
and are my good friends."
"Cynara's Toy is discreet," says Hannetillon: "it mentions not Zarafis,
Ahiram, the old Trebister, and the young Mahmoud, who is not made to
be forgotten; nor does it accuse the least Bramin, tho' it has been
running thro' the monasteries these twelve years."
"I have received some visits in my life," says Melissa's Toy, "but not
one from Grifgrif or Fortimbek, and much less still from Hannetillon."
"My little heart of a Toy," replied Grifgrif, "you are mistaken. You
may disclaim Fortimbek and me, but as to Hannetillon, he is better with
you than you allow. He has told me a word or two on the subject, and
he is a spark of the greatest veracity in Congo, a better man than any
of those whom you have known, and is still capable of establishing the
reputation of a Toy."
"The reputation of an impostor can no more escape him than his friend
Fadaes," says Fatima's Toy with a sob. "What have I done to these
monsters to dishonour me? The son of the Abyssinian Emperor came to
Erguebzed's court: I pleased him; he pursued me; but he would have
fail'd of success, and I should have continued faithful to my husband
whom I loved; had not the traitor Velvet-Paw and his base accomplice
Fadaes corrupted my women, and introduced the young prince into my
bath."
The Toys of Zirphila and Zulica, who had the same cause to defend,
spoke both at the same time, but with such rapidity, that it was
extremely difficult to render each of them its due.--"Favors!" cried
one----"To Velvet-Paw!" says the other----"Something may be said for
Zinzim"----"Cerbelon"----"Bemengel"----"Agarias"----"the French slave
Riqueli"----"the young Ethiopian Thezaca"----"But as for the insipid
Velvet-Paw"----"the insolent Fadaes"----"I swear by Brama"----"I call
the great Pagoda and the Genius Cucufa to witness"----"I know them
not"----"I never had the least dealings with them.----"
Zirphila and Zulica would have run on, God knows how far, if Mangogul
had not turn'd off his ring: but as this magic ring ceased acting on
them, their Toys closed their lips, and a profound silence succeeded
the noise they made. Then the Sultan rose up, and darting furious looks
on our young blockheads, said: "You have taken the liberty to defame
women whom you never had the honour of coming near, and who hardly know
your names. Who has made ye insolent enough to lie in my presence?
Tremble, wretches." At these words he grasped his cymeter: but the
screams of the affrighted ladies stop'd his hand. "I was going," says
Mangogul, "to give ye the death which you have merited: but the ladies,
whom you have injured, have a right to determine your fate: it shall
depend on them, either to crush ye, or to let ye live. Speak, ladies,
what are your commands?"
"That they live," says Mirzoza, "and hold their tongues, if possible."
"Live," replies the Sultan, "these ladies permit it: but if ever you
forget on what condition, I swear by my father's soul----"
Mangogul did not complete his oath; being interrupted by one of the
gentlemen of his bed-chamber, who inform'd him that the comedians were
ready. This prince had imposed it on himself as a law never to retard
the public diversions. "Let them begin," says he, and immediately gave
his hand to the favorite, whom he accompanied to her box.