CHAPTER XXIII

_Contains a very brief account of every material occurrence that

happened in regard of our fair widow, during the space of a whole year,

with some other particulars of less moment_

Mr. Thoughtless was not at home when the news of Mr. Munden's death

arrived; but, as soon as he was informed of it, he went to his sister;

and, on finding her much more deeply affected at this accident than he

could have imagined, pressed her, in the most tender terms, to quit that

scene of mortality, and return to his house: the persuasions of a

brother, who of late had behaved with so much kindness towards her,

prevailed on her to accept of the invitation; and, having given some

necessary orders in regard to the family, was carried away that same

night in a chair, with the curtains close drawn.

She saw no company, however, till after the funeral; and, when that was

over, Lady Loveit was the first admitted. As Mrs. Munden was still under

a great dejection of spirits, which was visible in her countenance, 'If

I did not know you to be the sincerest creature in the world,' said Lady

Loveit, 'I should take you to be the greatest dissembler in it; for it

would be very difficult for any one less acquainted with you, to believe

you could be really afflicted at the death of a person whose life

rendered you so unhappy.'

'Mistake me not, Lady Loveit,' answered she; 'I do not pretend to lament

the death of Mr. Munden, as it deprives me of his society, or as that of

a person with whom I could ever have enjoyed any great share of

felicity, even though his life had made good the professions of his last

moments: but I lament him as one who was my husband, whom duty forbids

me to hate while living, and whom decency requires me to mourn for when

dead.'

'So, then,' cried Lady Loveit, 'I find you take as much pains to grieve

for a bad husband, as those who have the misfortune to lose a good one

do to alleviate their sorrows: but, my dear,' continued she, with a more

serious air, 'I see no occasion for all this. I am well assured that

your virtue, and the sweetness of your temper, enabled you to discharge

all the duties of a wife to Mr. Munden while alive; and with that I

think you ought to be content: he is now dead--the covenant between you

is dissolved--Heaven has released you--and, I hope, forgiven him;

decency obliges you to wear black--forbids you to appear abroad for a

whole month--and at any publick place of diversion for a much longer

time; but it does not restrain you from being easy in yourself, and

chearful with your friends.'

'Your ladyship speaks right,' said Mrs. Munden: 'but yet there is a

shock in death which one cannot presently get over.'--'I grant there

is,' replied Lady Loveit; 'and if we thought too deeply on it, we should

feel all the agonies of that dreadful hour before our time, and become a

burden to ourselves and to the world.'

It is certain, indeed, that the surprize and pity for Mr. Munden's

sudden and unexpected fate had at the first overwhelmed her soul; yet,

when those emotions were a little evaporated, she rather indulged

affliction, because she thought it her duty to do so, than endeavoured

any way to combat with it.

It was not, therefore, very difficult to reason her out of a melancholy

which she had in a manner forced upon herself, and was far from being

natural to her; and when once convinced that she ought to be easy under

this stroke of Providence, became entirely so.

The painful task she had imposed upon her mind being over, more

agreeable ones succeeded: the remembrance of Mr. Trueworth--his

recovered love--the knowledge he had of hers--and the consideration that

now both of them were in a condition to avow their mutual tenderness

without a crime, could not but transfuse a sensation more pleasing than

she had ever before been capable of experiencing.

In the mean time, that gentleman passed through a variety of emotions on

her account; nor will it seem strange he should do so to any one who

casts the least retrospect on his former behaviour; he had loved her

from the first moment he beheld her; and had continued to love her for a

long series of time with such an excess of passion, that not all his

reason on her ill-treatment of him, and her supposed unworthiness, was

scarce sufficient to enable him wholly to desist: a new amour was

requisite to divide his wishes--the fondness and artful blandishments of

Miss Flora served to wean his heart from the once darling object--but

there demanded no less than the amiable person, and more amiable temper,

of Miss Harriot, to drive thence an idea so accustomed to preside. All

this, however, as it appeared, did not wholly extinguish the first

flame; the innocence of the charming Miss Betsy fully cleared up--all

the errors of her conduct reformed--rekindled in him an esteem; the

sight of her, after so many months absence, made the seemingly dead

embers of desire begin to glow, and, on the discovery of her sentiments

in his favour, burst forth into a blaze: he was not master of himself in

the first rush of so joyous a surprize--he forgot she was married--he

approached her in the manner the reader has already been told; and for

which he afterwards severely condemned himself, as thinking he ought to

be content with knowing she loved him, without putting her modesty to

the blush by letting her perceive the discovery he had made.

As Lady Loveit, without suspecting the effect which her discourse

produced, had been often talking of the ill-treatment she received from

Mr. Munden, and the necessity she had been under of quitting his house,

the sincere veneration she now had for her made him sympathize in all

the disquiets he was sensible she sustained; but when he heard this

cruel husband was no more, and, at the same time, was informed in what

manner she behaved, both in his last moments, and after his decease,

nothing, not even his love, could equal his admiration of her virtue and

her prudence.

What would he not now have given to have seen her! but he knew such a

thing was utterly impracticable; and to attempt it might lose him all

the tenderness she had for him: his impatience, however, would not

suffer him to seem altogether passive and unconcerned at an event of so

much moment to the happiness of them both; and he resolved to write, but

to find terms to express himself so as not to offend either her

delicacy, by seeming too presuming, or her tenderness, by a pretended

indifference, cost him some pains; but, at length, he dictated the

following little billet.

'To Mrs. Munden.

Madam,

I send you no compliments of condolence; but beg you to be

assured, that my heart is too deeply interested in every thing

that regards you, to be capable of feeling the least satisfaction

while yours remains under any inquietude: all I wish at present is,

that you would believe this truth; which, if you do, I know you

have too much justice, and too much generosity, to lavish all your

commiseration on the insensible dead, but will reserve some part

for the living, who stand most in need of it. I dare add no more as

yet, than that I am, with an esteem perfect and inviolable, Madam,

your most obedient, most devoted, and most faithful servant,

C. TRUEWORTH.'

These few lines, perhaps, served more to raise the spirits of Mrs.

Munden than all she could receive from any other quarter; she

nevertheless persevered in maintaining the decorum of her condition; and

as she had resolved to retire into L----e in case of a separation from

her husband, she thought it most proper to fix her residence in that

place in her state of widowhood, at least for the first year of it.

Accordingly, she wrote to Lady Trusty to acquaint her with her

intentions, and received an answer such as she expected, full of praises

for her conduct in this point, and the most pressing invitations to come

down with all the speed she could.

What little business she had in London was soon dispatched, and all was

ready for her quitting it within a month after the death of Mr. Munden:

places for herself and her maid were taken in the stagecoach--all her

things were packed up, and sent to the inn; she thought nothing now

remained but to take leave of Lady Loveit, whom she expected that same

evening, being the last she was to stay in town; but, near as her

departure was, fortune in the mean time had contrived an accident, which

put all her fortitude, and presence of mind, to as great a trial as she

had ever yet sustained.

Lady Loveit, having got a cold, had complained of some little disorder

the day before; and though nothing could be more slight than her

indisposition, yet, as she was pretty far advanced in her pregnancy, the

care of her physician, and the tenderness of Sir Bazil, would not permit

her by any means to expose herself to the open air.

Mrs. Munden being informed by a messenger from her of what had happened,

found herself under an absolute necessity of waiting on her, as it would

have been ridiculous and preposterous, as well as unkind, to have

quitted the town for so long a time without taking leave of a friend

such as Lady Loveit.

She could not think of going there without reflecting at the same time

how strong a probability there was of meeting Mr. Trueworth; she knew,

indeed, that he did not live at Sir Bazil's, having heard he had lately

taken a house for himself; but she knew also, that his close connection

with that family made him seldom let slip a day without seeing them; she

therefore prepared herself as well as she was able for such an

interview, in case it should so happen.

That gentleman had dined there; and on finding Lady Loveit was forbid

going abroad, and Sir Bazil unwilling to leave her alone, had consented

to stay with them the whole day: they were at ombre when Mrs. Munden

came, but on her entrance threw aside the cards; Lady Loveit received

her according to the familiarity between them, and Sir Bazil with little

less freedom; but Mr. Trueworth saluted her with a more distant air. 'I

had not the honour, Madam,' said he, 'to make you any compliments on

either of the great changes you have undergone; but you have always had

my best wishes for your prosperity.'

Mrs. Munden, who had pretty well armed herself for this encounter,

replied with a voice and countenance tolerably well composed, 'Great

changes indeed, Sir, have happened to us both in a short space of

time.'--'There have so, Madam,' resumed he; 'but may the next you meet

with bring with it lasting happiness!' She easily comprehended the

meaning of these words, but made no answer, being at loss what to say,

which might neither too much embolden, nor wholly discourage, the motive

which dictated them.

After this, the conversation turned on various subjects, but chiefly on

that of Mrs. Munden's going out of town: Mr. Trueworth said little; Lady

Loveit, though she expressed an infinite deal of sorrow for the loss of

so amiable a companion, could not forbear applauding her resolution in

this point; but Sir Bazil would fain have been a little pleasant on the

occasion, if the grave looks of Mrs. Munden had not put his raillery to

silence. Perceiving the day was near shut in, she rose to take her

leave; it was in vain that they used all imaginable arguments to

persuade her to stay supper; she told them, that as the coach went out

so early, it was necessary for her to take some repose before she

entered upon the fatigue of her journey; Lady Loveit on this allowed the

justice of her plea, and said no more.

The parting of these ladies was very moving; they embraced again and

again, promised to write frequently to each other, and mingled tears as

they exchanged farewels. Sir Bazil, who had really a very high esteem

for her, was greatly affected, in spite of the gaiety of his temper, on

bidding her adieu; and happy was it for Mrs. Munden that the concern

they were both in hindered them from perceiving that confusion, that

distraction of mind, which neither she nor Mr. Trueworth were able to

restrain totally the marks of as he approached to make her those

compliments, which might have been expected on such an occasion, even

from a person the most indifferent; his tongue, indeed, uttered no more

than words of course, but his lips trembled while saluting her; nor

could she in that instant withhold a sigh, which seemed to rend her very

heart: their mutual agitations were, in fine, too great not to be

visible to each other, and left neither of them any room to doubt of the

extreme force of the passion from which they sprang.

The motive which had made her refuse staying supper at Sir Bazil's, was

to prevent Mr. Trueworth from having any pretence to wait upon her home,

not being able to answer how far she could support her character, if

exposed to the tender things he might possibly address her with on such

an opportunity; and she now found, by what she had felt on parting with

him, how necessary the precaution was that she had taken.

After a night less engrossed by sleep than meditation, she set out for

L----e, where she arrived without any ill accident to retard her journey;

and was received by Sir Ralph and Lady Trusty with all those

demonstrations of joy, which she had reason to expect from the

experienced friendship of those worthy persons.

As this was the place of her nativity, and her father had always lived

there in very great estimation, the house of Lady Trusty at first was

thronged with persons of almost all conditions, who came to pay their

compliments to her fair guest; and as no circumstance, no habit, could

take from her those charms which nature had bestowed upon her, her

beauty and amiable qualities soon became the theme of conversation

through the whole country.

She was not insensible of the admiration she attracted; but was now far

from being elated with it: all the satisfaction she took out of her dear

Lady Trusty's company was in reading some instructive or entertaining

book, and in the letters of those whom she knew to be her sincere

friends; but she had not been much above two months in the country

before she received one from a quarter whence she had not expected it.

It was from Mr. Trueworth, and contained as follows.

'To Mrs. Munden.

Madam,

I have the inexpressible pleasure to hear that you are well by

those whom you favour with your correspondence; but, as they may

not think any mention of me might be agreeable to you, I take the

liberty myself to acquaint you that I live; and flatter myself that

information is sufficient to make you know that I live only to be,

with the most firm attachment, Madam, your eternally devoted

servant,

C. TRUEWORTH.'

These few lines assuring her of his love, and at the same time of his

respect, by his not presuming once to mention the passion of which he

was possessed, charmed her to a very high degree, and prepared her heart

for another, which, in a few weeks after, he found a pretence for

sending to her. It contained these lines.

'To Mrs. Munden.

I am now more unhappy than ever; Lady Loveit is gone out of town,

and I have no opportunity of hearing the only sounds that can bless

my longing ears: in pity, therefore, to my impatience, vouchsafe to

let me know you are in health--say that you are well--it is all I

ask. One line will cost you little pains, and be no breach of that

decorum to which you so strictly adhere; yet will be a sovereign

specifick to restore the tranquillity of him who is, with an

unspeakable regard, Madam, your unalterable, and devoted servant,

C. TRUEWORTH.'

Mrs. Munden found this epistle so reasonable, and withal couched in such

respectful terms, that she ought not to refuse compliance with it; and,

accordingly, wrote to him in this manner.

'To Charles Trueworth, Esq.

Sir,

The generous concern you express for my welfare demands a no less

grateful return. As to my health, it is no way impaired since I

left London; nor can my mind labour under any discomposure, while

my friends continue to think kindly of me. I am, with all due

respect, Sir, yours, &c.

B. MUNDEN.'

Upon this obliging answer he ventured to write again, intreating her to

allow a correspondence with him by letters while she remained in L----e;

urging, that this was a favour she could not reasonably deny to any

friend who desired it with the same sincerity she must be convinced he

did.

Mrs. Munden paused a little; but finding that neither her virtue nor her

reputation could any way suffer by granting this request, her heart

would not permit her to deny both him and herself so innocent a

satisfaction; and by the next post gave him the permission he petitioned

for, in these words.

'To Charles Trueworth, Esq.

Sir,

I should be unjust to myself, as well as ungrateful to the

friendship with which you honour me, should I reject any proofs of

it that are consistent with my character to receive and to return:

write, therefore, as often as you think proper; and be assured I

shall give your letters all the welcome you can wish, provided they

contain nothing unsuitable to the present condition of her who is,

as much as you ought to expect, Sir, yours, &c.

B. MUNDEN.'

After this, an uninterrupted intercourse of letters continued between

them for the whole remainder of the year. Mr. Trueworth was for the most

part extremely cautious in what manner he expressed himself; but

whenever, as it would sometimes so happen, the warmth of his passion

made him transgress the bounds which had been prescribed him, she would

not seem to understand, because she had no mind to be offended.

Thus equally maintaining that reserve which she thought the situation

she was in demanded, and at the same time indulging the tenderness of

her heart for a man who so well deserved it, she enjoyed that sweet

contentment which true love alone has the power of bestowing.

The History of Miss Betsy Thoughtless · 第 23 / 24 章