HE WHO FOUND THE LIGHT--I
'He who pointed out the way to those that had lost it.'
_Life of the Buddha._
The life-story of Prince Theiddatha, who saw the light and became the
Buddha twenty-five centuries ago, has been told in English many times.
It has been told in translations from the Pali, from Burmese, and from
Chinese, and now everyone has read it. The writers, too, of these books
have been men of great attainments, of untiring industry in searching
out all that can be known of this life, of gifts such as I cannot aspire
to. There is now nothing new to learn of those long past days, nothing
fresh for me to tell, no discovery that can be made. Yet in thinking out
what I have to say about the religion of the Burmese, I have found that
I must tell again some of the life of the Buddha, I must rewrite this
ten-times-told tale, of which I know nothing new. And the reason is
this: that although I know nothing that previous writers have not known,
although I cannot bring to the task anything like their knowledge, yet
I have something to say that they have not said. For they have written
of him as they have learned from books, whereas I want to write of him
as I have learned from men. Their knowledge has been taken from the
records of the dead past, whereas mine is from the actualities of the
living present.
I do not mean that the Buddha of the sacred books and the Buddha of the
Burman's belief are different persons. They are the same. But as I found
it with their faith, so I find it with the life of their teacher. The
Burmese regard the life of the Buddha from quite a different standpoint
to that of an outsider, and so it has to them quite a different value,
quite a different meaning, to that which it has to the student of
history. For to the writer who studies the life of the Buddha with a
view merely to learn what that life was, and to criticise it, everything
is very different to what it is to the Buddhist who studies that life
because he loves it and admires it, and because he desires to follow it.
To the former the whole detail of every portion of the life of the
Buddha, every word of his teaching, every act of his ministry, is sought
out and compared and considered. Legend is compared with legend, and
tradition with tradition, that out of many authorities some clue to the
actual fact may be found. But to the Buddhist the important parts in the
great teacher's life are those acts, those words, that appeal directly
to him, that stand out bravely, lit with the light of his own
experiences and feelings, that assist him in living his own life. His
Buddha is the Buddha he understands, and who understood and sympathized
with such as him. Other things may be true, but they are matters of
indifference.
To hear of the Buddha from living lips in this country, which is full of
his influence, where the spire of his monastery marks every village, and
where every man has at one time or another been his monk, is quite a
different thing to reading of him in far countries, under other skies
and swayed by other thoughts. To sit in the monastery garden in the
dusk, in just such a tropic dusk as he taught in so many years ago, and
hear the yellow-robed monk tell of that life, and repeat his teaching of
love, and charity, and compassion--eternal love, perfect charity,
endless compassion--until the stars come out in the purple sky, and the
silver-voiced gongs ring for evening prayers, is a thing never to be
forgotten. As you watch the starlight die and the far-off hills fade
into the night, as the sounds about you still, and the calm silence of
the summer night falls over the whole earth, you know and understand the
teacher of the Great Peace as no words can tell you. A sympathy comes to
you from the circle of believers, and you believe, too. An influence and
an understanding breathes from the nature about you--the same nature
that the teacher saw--from the whispering fig-trees and the scented
champaks, and the dimly seen statues in the shadows of the shrines, that
you can never gain elsewhere. And as the monks tell you the story of
that great life, they bring it home to you with reflection and comment,
with application to your everyday existence, till you forget that he of
whom they speak lived so long ago, so very long ago, and your heart is
filled with sorrow when you remember that he is dead, that he is entered
into his peace.
I do not hope that I can convey much of this in my writing. I always
feel the hopelessness of trying to put on paper the great thoughts, the
intense feeling, of which Buddhism is so full. But still I can, perhaps,
give something of this life as I have heard it, make it a little more
living than it has been to us, catch some little of that spirit of
sympathy that it holds for all the world.
Around the life of the Buddha has gathered much myth, like dust upon an
ancient statue, like shadows upon the mountains far away, blurring
detail here and there, and hiding the beauty. There are all sorts of
stories of the great portents that foretold his coming: how the sun and
the stars knew, and how the wise men prophesied. Marvels attended his
birth, and miracles followed him in life and in death. And the
appearance of the miraculous has even been heightened by the style of
the chroniclers in telling us of his mental conflicts: by the
personification of evil in the spirit Man, and of desire in his three
beautiful daughters.
All the teacher's thoughts, all his struggles, are materialized into
forms, that they may be more readily brought home to the reader, that
they may be more clearly realized by a primitive people as actual
conflicts.
Therefore at first sight it seems that of all creeds none is so full of
miracle, so teeming with the supernatural, as Buddhism, which is,
indeed, the very reverse of the truth. For to the supernatural Buddhism
owes nothing at all. It is in its very essence opposed to all that goes
beyond what we can see of earthly laws, and miracle is never used as
evidence of the truth of any dogma or of any doctrine.
If every supernatural occurrence were wiped clean out of the chronicles
of the faith, Buddhism would, even to the least understanding of its
followers, remain exactly where it is. Not in one jot or tittle would it
suffer in the authority of its teaching. The great figure of the teacher
would even gain were all the tinsel of the miraculous swept from him, so
that he stood forth to the world as he lived--would gain not only to our
eyes, but even to theirs who believe in him. For the Buddha was no
prophet. He was no messenger from any power above this world, revealing
laws of that power. No one came to whisper into his ear the secrets of
eternity, and to show him where truth lived. In no trance, in no
vision, did he enter into the presence of the Unknown, and return from
thence full of the wisdom of another world; neither did he teach the
worship of any god, of any power. He breathed no threatenings of revenge
for disobedience, of forgiveness for the penitent. He held out no
everlasting hell to those who refused to follow him, no easily gained
heaven to his believers.
He went out to seek wisdom, as many a one has done, looking for the laws
of God with clear eyes to see, with a pure heart to understand, and
after many troubles, after many mistakes, after much suffering, he came
at last to the truth.
Even as Newton sought for the laws of God in the movement of the stars,
in the falling of a stone, in the stir of the great waters, so this
Newton of the spiritual world sought for the secrets of life and death,
looking deep into the heart of man, marking its toil, its suffering, its
little joys, with a soul attuned to catch every quiver of the life of
the world. And as to Newton truth did not come spontaneously, did not
reveal itself to him at his first call, but had to be sought with toil
and weariness, till at last he reached it where it hid in the heart of
all things, so it was with the prince. He was not born with the
knowledge in him, but had to seek it as every other man has done. He
made mistakes as other men do. He wasted time and labour following wrong
roads, demonstrating to himself the foolishness of many thoughts. But,
never discouraged, he sought on till he found, and what he found he
gave as a heritage to all men for ever, that the way might be easier for
them than it had been for him.
Nothing is more clear than this: that to the Buddhist his teacher was
but a man like himself, erring and weak, who made himself perfect, and
that even as his teacher has done, so, too, may he if he do but observe
the everlasting laws of life which the Buddha has shown to the world.
These laws are as immutable as Newton's laws, and come, like his, from
beyond our ken.
And this, too, is another point wherein the parallel with Newton will
help us: that just as when Newton discovered gravitation he was obliged
to stop, for his knowledge of that did not lead him at once to the
knowledge of the infinite, so when he had attained the laws of
righteousness, Gaudama the Buddha also stopped, because here his
standing-ground failed. It is not true, that which has been imputed to
the Buddha by those who have never tried to understand him--that he
denied some power greater than ourselves; that because he never tried to
define the indefinite, to confine the infinite within the corners of a
phrase, therefore his creed was materialistic. We do not say of Newton
that he was an atheist because when he taught us of gravity he did not
go further and define to us in equations Him who made gravity; and as we
understand more of the Buddha, as we search into life and consider his
teaching, as we try to think as he thought, and to see as he saw, we
understand that he stopped as Newton stopped, because he had come to the
end of all that he could see, not because he declared that he knew all
things, and that beyond his knowledge there was nothing.
No teacher more full of reverence, more humble than Gaudama the Buddha
ever lived to be an example to us through all time. He tells us of what
he knows; of what he knows not he is silent. Of the laws that he can
see, the great sequences of life to death, of evil to sorrow, of
goodness to happiness, he tells in burning words. Of the beginning and
the end of the world, of the intentions and the ways of the great
Unknown, he tells us nothing at all. He is no prophet, as we understand
the word, but a man; and all that is divine in him beyond what there is
in us is that he hated the darkness and sought the light, sought and was
not dismayed, and at last he found.
And yet nothing could be further from the truth than to call the Buddha
a philosopher and Buddhism a philosophy. Whatever he was, he was no
philosopher. Although he knew not any god, although he rested his claims
to be heard upon the fact that his teachings were clear and
understandable, that you were not required to believe, but only to open
your eyes and see, and 'his delight was in the contemplation of
unclouded truth,' yet he was far from a philosopher. His was not an
appeal to our reason, to our power of putting two and two together and
making five of them; his teachings were no curious designs woven with
words, the counters of his thought. He appealed to the heart, not to the
brain; to our feelings, not to our power of arranging these feelings. He
drew men to him by love and reverence, and held them so for ever. Love
and charity and compassion, endless compassion, are the foundations of
his teachings; and his followers believe in him because they have seen
in him the just man made perfect, and because he has shown to them the
way in which all men may become even as he is.
He was a prince in a little kingdom in the Northeast of India, the son
of King Thudoodana and his wife Maia. He was strong, we are told, and
handsome, famous in athletic exercises, and his father looked forward to
the time when he should be grown a great man, and a leader of armies.
His father's ambition for him was that he should be a great conqueror,
that he should lead his troops against the neighbouring kings and
overcome them, and in time make for himself a wide-stretching empire.
India was in those days, as in many later ones, split up into little
kingdoms, divided from each other by no natural boundary, overlooked by
no sovereign power, and always at war. And the king, as fathers are, was
full of dreams that this son of his should subdue all India to himself,
and be the glory of his dynasty, and the founder of a great race.
Everything seemed to fall in with the desire of the king. The prince
grew up strong and valiant, skilled in action, wise in counsel, so that
all his people were proud of him. Everything fell in with the desire of
the king except the prince himself, for instead of being anxious to
fight, to conquer other countries, to be a great leader of armies, his
desires led him away from all this. Even as a boy he was meditative and
given to religious musings, and as he grew up he became more and more
confirmed in his wish to know of sacred things, more and more an
inquirer into the mysteries of life.
He was taught all the faith of those days, a faith so old that we do not
know whence it came. He was brought up to believe that life is immortal,
that no life can ever utterly die. He was taught that all life is one;
that there is not one life of the beasts and one life of men, but that
all life was one glorious unity, one great essence coming from the
Unknown. Man is not a thing apart from this world, but of it. As man's
body is but the body of beasts, refined and glorified, so the soul of
man is but a higher stage of the soul of beasts. Life is a great ladder.
At the bottom are the lower forms of animals, and some way up is man;
but all are climbing upwards for ever, and sometimes, alas! falling
back. Existence is for each man a great struggle, punctuated with many
deaths; and each death ends one period but to allow another to begin, to
give us a new chance of working up and gaining heaven.
He was taught that this ladder is very high, that its top is very far
away, above us, out of our sight, and that perfection and happiness lie
up there, and that we must strive to reach them. The greatest man, even
the greatest king, was farther below perfection than an animal was below
him. We are very near the beasts, but very far from heaven. So he was
taught to remember that even as a very great prince he was but a weak
and erring soul, and that unless he lived well, and did honest deeds,
and was a true man, instead of rising he might fall.
This teaching appealed to the prince far more than all the urging of his
father and of the courtiers that he should strive to become a great
conqueror. It entered into his very soul, and his continual thought was
how he was to be a better man, how he was to use this life of his so
that he should gain and not lose, and where he was to find happiness.
All the pomp and glory of the palace, all its luxury and ease, appealed
to him very little. Even in his early youth he found but little pleasure
in it, and he listened more to those who spoke of holiness than to those
who spoke of war. He desired, we are told, to become a hermit, to cast
off from him his state and dignity, and to put on the yellow garments of
a mendicant, and beg his bread wandering up and down upon the world,
seeking for peace.
This disposition of the prince grieved his parents very much. That their
son, who was so full of promise, so brave and so strong, so wise and so
much beloved by everyone, should become a mendicant clad in unclean
garments, begging his daily food from house to house, seemed to them a
horrible thing. It could never be permitted that a prince should
disgrace himself in this way. Every effort must be taken to eradicate
such ideas; after all, it was but the melancholy of youth, and it would
pass. So stringent orders were given to distract his mind in every way
from solemn thoughts, to attempt by a continued round of pleasure and
luxury to attract him to more worldly things. And when he was eighteen
he was married to his cousin Yathodaya, in the hope that in marriage and
paternity he might forget his desire to be a hermit, might feel that
love was better than wisdom. And if Yathodaya had been other than she
was--who can tell?--perhaps after all the king might have succeeded; but
it was not to be so. For to Yathodaya, too, life was a very solemn
thing, not to be thrown away in laughter and frivolity, but to be used
as a great gift worthy of all care. To the prince in his trouble there
came a kindred soul, and though from the palace all the teachers of
religion, all who would influence the prince against the desires of his
father, were banished, yet Yathodaya more than made up to him for all he
had lost. For nearly ten years they lived together there such a life as
princes led in those days in the East, not, perhaps, so very different
from what they lead now.
And all that time the prince had been gradually making up his mind,
slowly becoming sure that life held something better than he had yet
found, hardening his determination that he must leave all that he had
and go out into the world looking for peace. Despite all the efforts of
the king his father, despite the guards and his young men companions,
despite the beauty of the dancing-girls, the mysteries of life came home
to him, and he was afraid. It is a beautiful story told in quaint
imagery how it was that the knowledge of sickness and of death came to
him, a horror stalking amid the glories of his garden. He learnt, and he
understood, that he too would grow old, would fall sick, would die. And
beyond death? There was the fear, and no one could allay it. Daily he
grew more and more discontented with his life in the palace, more and
more averse to the pleasures that were around him. Deeper and deeper he
saw through the laughing surface to the depths that lay beneath.
Silently all these thoughts ripened in his mind, till at last the change
came. We are told that the end came suddenly, the resolve was taken in a
moment. The lake fills and fills until at length it overflows, and in a
night the dam is broken, and the pent-up waters are leaping far towards
the sea.
As the prince returned from his last drive in his garden with resolve
firmly established in his heart, there came to him the news that his
wife had borne to him a son. Wife and child, his cup of desire was now
full. But his resolve was unshaken. 'See, here is another tie, alas! a
new and stronger tie that I must break,' he said; but he never wavered.
That night the prince left the palace. Silently in the dead of night he
left all the luxury about him, and went out secretly with only his
faithful servant, Maung San, to saddle for him his horse and lead him
forth. Only before he left he looked in cautiously to see Yathodaya, the
young wife and mother. She was lying asleep, with one hand upon the face
of her firstborn, and the prince was afraid to go further. 'To see him,'
he said, 'I must remove the hand of his mother, and she may awake; and
if she awake, how shall I depart? I will go, then, without seeing my
son. Later on, when all these passions are faded from my heart, when I
am sure of myself, perhaps then I shall be able to see him. But now I
must go.'
So he went forth very silently and very sadly, and leapt upon his
horse--the great white horse that would not neigh for fear of waking the
sleeping guards--and the prince and his faithful noble Maung San went
out into the night. He was only twenty-eight when he fled from all his
world, and what he sought was this: 'Deliverance for men from the misery
of life, and the knowledge of the truth that will lead them unto the
Great Peace.'
This is the great renunciation.
I have often talked about this with the monks and others, often heard
them speak about this great renunciation, of this parting of the prince
and his wife.
'You see,' said a monk once to me, 'he was not yet the Buddha, he had
not seen the light, only he was desirous to look for it. He was just a
prince, just a man like any other man, and he was very fond of his wife.
It is very hard to resist a woman if she loves you and cries, and if you
love her. So he was afraid.'
And when I said that Yathodaya was also religious, and had helped him in
his thoughts, and that surely she would not have stopped him, the monk
shook his head.
'Women are not like that,' he said.
And a woman said to me once: 'Surely she was very much to be pitied
because her husband went away from her and her baby. Do you think that
when she talked religion with her husband she ever thought that it would
cause him to leave her and go away for ever? If she had thought that,
she would never have done as she did. A woman would never help anything
to sever her husband from her, not even religion. And when after ten
years a baby had come to her! Surely she was very much to be pitied.'
This woman made me understand that the highest religion of a woman is
the true love of her husband, of her children; and what is it to her if
she gain the whole world, but lose that which she would have?
All the story of Yathodaya and her dealings with her husband is full of
the deepest pathos, full of passionate protest against her loss, even in
order that her husband and all the world should gain. She would have
held him, if she could, against the world, and deemed that she did well.
And so, though it is probable that it was a great deal owing to
Yathodaya's help, to her sympathy, to her support in all his
difficulties, that Gaudama came to his final resolve to leave the world
and seek for the truth, yet she acted unwittingly of what would be the
end.
'She did not know,' said the woman. 'She helped her husband, but she did
not know to what. And when she was ill, when she was giving birth to her
baby, then her husband left her. Surely she was very much to be pitied.'
And so Yathodaya, the wife of the Prince Gaudama, who became the Buddha,
is held in high honour, in great esteem, by all Buddhists. By the men,
because she helped her husband to his resolve to seek for the truth,
because she had been his great stay and help when everyone was against
him, because if there had been no Yathodaya there had been perchance no
Buddha. And by the women--I need not say why she is honoured by all
women. If ever there was a story that appealed to woman's heart, surely
it is this: her love, her abandonment, her courage, her submission when
they met again in after-years, her protest against being sacrificed upon
the altar of her husband's religion. Truly, it is all of the very
essence of humanity. Whenever the story of the Buddha comes to be
written, then will be written also the story of the life of Yathodaya
his wife. If one is full of wisdom and teaching, the other is full of
suffering and teaching also. I cannot write it here. I have so much to
say on other matters that there is no room. But some day it will be
written, I trust, this old message to a new world.