think. I have just spent an hour alone. I meant to commit a crime, and
you know how impatiently passion sweeps me along. But what misfortunes
have assailed me! The army destroyed; the desertion of Herod and
Pinarius; Antony's generous, trusting heart torn by base treachery, his
soul darkened; the reconstruction of the canal, the last hope--Gorgias
brought the news--the same as destroyed. Just then little Alexander came
to show me his bird's nest. Everything else in the garden seemed to him
worthless by comparison. This awakened new thoughts, and now here is the
little house which the children have built with their own hands. All
these things forced me by some mysterious power to look back along the
course of my life to the distant days in your father's house--I--These
children! Upon what different foundations our lives have been built!
I made them begin at the point I had gained when youth lay behind me.
My childhood commenced among the disorders of the government, clouded by
my father's exile and my mother's death, on the brink of ruin. That of
the twins--they are ten years old--will soon be over--and now, after
enjoying pleasures not one of which was bestowed on me, they must endure
the same sorrow. But did not we have better ones? What they daily
possessed we only dreamed of in our simple garden. How often I let you
share the radiant visions which my soul revealed to me! You willingly
accompanied me into the splendid fairy world of my dreams. All that my
imagination conjured up during the years of quiet and repose accompanied
me into my after-life. Again and again I have beheld them, rich and
powerful, upon the throne. The means of rendering the vision a varity
were at hand; and when I met the man whose own life resembled the
realization of a dream, I recalled those childish fancies and made them
facts. The marvels with which I adorned my lover's existence were
childish dreams to which I gave tangible form. This garden is an image
of the life to which I intended to rise; in reality, fell. We collected
within the limits of this bit of earth everything which can delight the
senses; not a single one is omitted in this narrow space, whose crowded
maze of pleasures fairly impede freedom of movement. Yet in your home,
and guided by your wise father, I had learned to be content with so
little, and commenced the struggle to attain peace. That painless peace
--our chief good--whence came it? Through me it was lost to you both
But the children--I made them begin their lives in an arena of every
disturbing influence; and now I see how their own healthy natures yearn
to escape from the dazzling wealth of colour, the stupefying fragrance,
the bewildering songs and twittering. They long to return to the
untilled earth, where the life of struggling mortals began.
"The boy casts away the baubles, to test his own creative powers. The
girl follows his example, and clings fast only to the doll in which she
sees the living child, in order to do justice to the maternal instinct,
the token of her sex. But what they so eagerly desire is right, and
shall be granted. When I was ten years old, like the twins, my life and
efforts were already directed towards one fixed goal. They are still
blindly following the objects set before them. Let them return to the
place whence their mother started, where she received everything good
which is still hers. They shall go to the garden of Epicurus, no matter
whether it is the old one in Kanopus or elsewhere. All that their mother
beheld in vivid dreams, which she often strove with wanton extravagance
to realize, has surrounded them from their birth and early satiated them.
When they enter life, they will scorn what merely stirs and dazzles the
senses, and cling to the aspiration for painless peace of mind, if a wise
guide directs them and protects them from the dangers which the teachings
of Epicurus contain for youth. I have found this guide, and you, too,
will trust him--I mean your brother Archibius."
"Archibius?" asked Charmian in surprise. "Yes, he who grew up in the
garden of Epicurus, and in life and philosophy found the support which
has preserved his peace of mind during all the conflicts of existence--
he who loves the mother, and to whom the children are also dear--
he to whom the boys and girls cling with affectionate confidence. I wish
to place the children under his protection and, if he will consent to
grant this desire of the most hapless of women, I shall look forward
calmly to the end. It is approaching! I feel, I know it! Gorgias is
already at work upon the plan for my tomb."
"O my Queen!" cried Charmian sorrowfully. Whatever may happen, your
illustrious life cannot be in danger! The generous heart of Mark Antony
does not throb in Octavianus's breast, but he is not cruel, and for the
very reason that cool calculation curbs ambition he will spare you. He
knows that you are the idol of the city, the whole country; and if he
really succeeds in adding fresh victories to this first conquest, if the
immortals permit your throne and--may they avert it!--your sacred person,
too, to fall into his power--"
"Then," cried Cleopatra, her clear eyes flashing, "then he shall learn
which of us two is the greater--then I shall know how to maintain the
right to despise him, though blind Fate should make the whole power of
the world subject to him who robbed my son and Caesar's of his heritage!"
Her eyes had blazed with anger as she uttered the words; then, letting
her little clenched hand fall, she went on in an altered tone:
"Months may pass before he is strong enough to risk the attack, and the
immortals themselves approved the erection of the monument. The only
obstacle in the way, the house of the old philosopher Didymus, was
destroyed. A messenger from Gorgias brought the news. It is to be the
second monument in Alexandria worthy of notice. The other contains the
body of the great Alexander, to whom the city owes its origin and name.
He who subjected half the world to his power and the genius of the
Greeks, was younger than I when he died. Whence do I, by whose miserable
weakness the battle of Actium was lost, derive the right to walk longer
beneath the sun? Perhaps Mark Antony will arrive in a few hours."
"And will you meet the disheartened hero in this mood?" interrupted
Charmian.
"He does not wish to be received," answered Cleopatra bitterly. "He even
refused to let me greet him, and I understand the denial. But what must
have overwhelmed this joyous nature, so friendly to all mankind, that he
longs for solitude and avoids meeting those who are nearest and dearest?
Iras is now at the Choma--whither he wishes to retire--to see that
everything is in order. She will also provide a supply of the flowers
he loves. It is hard, cruelly hard, not to welcome him as usual.
Oh, Charmian, what joy it was when, with open arms and overflowing heart,
he swung his mighty figure ashore like a youth, while his handsome,
heroic face beamed with ardent love for me! And then--you do not forget
it either--when he raised his deep voice to shout the first greeting,
why, it seemed as if the very fish in the water must join in, and the
palm-trees on the shore wave their feathery tops in joyous sympathy.
And here! The dreams of my childhood, which I made reality for him,
received us, and our existence, wreathed with love and roses, became a
fairy tale. Since the day he rode towards us at Kanopus and offered me
the first bouquet, with his sunny glance wooing my love, his image has
stood before my soul as the embodiment of the virile strength which
conquers everything, and the bright, undimmed joy which renders the whole
world happy. And now--now? Do you remember the dull dreamer whom we
left ere he set forth for Paraetonium? But no, no, a thousand times no,
he must not remain so! Not with bowed head, but erect as in the days of
happiness, must he cross the threshold of Hades, hand in hand with her
whom he loved. And he does love me still. Else would he have followed
me hither, though no magic goblet drew him after me? And I? The heart
which, in the breast of the child, gave him its first young love, is
still his, and will be forever. Might I not go to the harbour and await
him there? Look me in the face, Charmian, and answer me as fearlessly as
a mirror: did Olympus really succeed in effacing the wrinkles?"
"They were scarcely visible before," was the reply, "and even the keenest
eye could no longer discover them. I have brought the pomade, too, and
the prescription Olympus gave me for--"
"Hush, hush!" interrupted Cleopatra softly. "There are many living
creatures in this garden, and they say that even the birds are good
listeners."
A roguish smile deepened the dimples in her cheeks as she spoke, and
delight in her bewitching grace forced from Charmian's lips the
exclamation:
"If Mark Antony could only see you now!"
"Flatterer!" replied the Queen with a grateful smile. But Charmian felt
that the time had now come to plead once more for Barine, and she began
eagerly:
"No, I certainly do not flatter. No one in Alexandria, no matter what
name she bears, could venture to vie even remotely with your charms. So
cease the persecution of the unfortunate woman whom you confided to my
care. It is an insult to Cleopatra--"
But here an indignant "Again!" interrupted her.
Cleopatra's face, which during the conversation had mirrored every
emotion of a woman's soul, from the deepest sorrow to the most
mischievous mirth, assumed an expression of repellent harshness, and,
with the curt remark, "You are forgetting what I had good reason to
forbid--I must go to my work," she turned her back upon the companion of
her youth.
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