CHAPTER III.

"THERE is a gentleman in the parlor, Miss Jessie," said Mary, the

chambermaid, opening the door and presenting her plain, but pleasant

face. It was an hour after Miss Loring had left her aunt in the

sitting room.

"Who is it, Mary?"

The girl handed her a card.

On it was engraved, PAUL HENDRICKSON. The heart of Jessie Loring

gave a sudden leap, and the blood sprung reddening to her very

temples.

"Say that I will be with him in a few minutes."

The servant retired, and Jessie, who had arisen as she received the

card, sat down, so overcome by her feelings, that she felt all

bodily strength depart.

"Paul Hendrickson!" she said, whispering the name. "How little did I

expect a visit from him! After our first interview last evening, he

seemed studiously to avoid me."

Then she arose hastily, but in a tremor, and made some hurried

changes in her dress. She was about leaving her room, when Mary

again presented herself.

"Another gentleman has called," and she handed another card. Jessie

took it and read LEON DEXTER!

Could anything have been more inopportune! Jessie felt a double

embarrassment.

"The fates are against me I believe!" she murmured, as, after a few

moments of vigorous expression of feeling, she left her room, and

descended to the parlor, entering with a light but firm tread.

Dexter stepped quickly forward, giving his hand in the most assured

style, and putting both her and himself entirely at ease. She smiled

upon him blandly, because she felt the contagion of his manner.

Hendrickson was more formal and distant, and showed some

embarrassment. He was not at ease himself, and failed to put Jessie

at ease.

After all were seated, Dexter talked freely, while Hendrickson sat,

for the most part silent, but, as Jessie felt, closely observant.

Light and playful were the subjects introduced by Mr. Dexter, and

his remarks caused a perpetual ripple of smiles to sparkle over the

countenance of Miss Loring. But whenever Mr. Hendrickson spoke to

her, the smiles faded, and she turned upon him a face so changed in

expression that he felt a chill pervade his feelings. She did not

mean to look grave; she did not repress the smiles purposely; there

was neither coldness nor repulsion in her heart. But her sentiments

touching Mr. Hendrickson were so different from those entertained

for Mr. Dexter; and her estimation of his character so widely

variant that she could not possibly treat him with the smiling

familiarity shown towards the other. Yet all the while she was

painfully conscious of being misunderstood. If she had met Mr.

Hendrickson alone, she felt that it must have been different. A

degree of embarrassment might have existed, but she would not have

been forced to put on two opposite exteriors, as now, neither of

which, correctly interpreted her state of mind, or did justice to

her character.

"I did not see much of you last evening, Mr. Hendrickson. What were

you doing with yourself?" she remarked, trying to be more familiar,

and giving him a look that set his pulses to a quicker measure.

Before he could answer, Dexter said, gaily, yet with covert sarcasm.

"Oh, Mr. Hendrickson prefers the society of elderly ladies. He spent

the evening in sober confabulation with Mrs. Denison. I have no

doubt she was edified. _I_ prefer maid to matron, at any time. Old

women are my horror."

Too light and gay were the tones of Dexter to leave room for

offence. Hendrickson tried to rally himself, and retort with

pleasant speech. But his heart was too deeply interested,--and his

mood too serious for sport. His smile did not improve the aspect of

his countenance; and if he meant his words for witticisms, they were

perceived as sarcasms. Jessie was rather repelled than attracted--all

of which he saw.

Conscious that he was wholly misrepresenting himself in the young

lady's eyes, and feeling, moreover, that he was only spoiling

pleasant company, Hendrickson, after a brief call, left the field

clear to his rival. Jessie accompanied him to the door.

"I shall be pleased to see you again, Mr. Hendrickson," she said, in

a tone of voice that betrayed something of her interest in him.

He turned to look into her eyes. They sustained his penetrating gaze

only for a moment and then her long lashes lay upon her crimsoning

cheeks.

"Not if I show myself as stupid as I have been this morning," said

the young man.

"I have never thought you stupid, Mr. Hendrickson."

"I am dull at times," he said, hesitating, and slightly confused.

"Good morning!" he added, abruptly, and turned off without another

look into the eyes that were upon him; and in which he would have

read more than his heart had dared to hope for.

"What a boor!" exclaimed Dexter as Miss Loring returned to the

parlor.

"Oh, no, not a boor, sir. Far, very far from that," answered the

young lady promptly.

"Well, you don't call him a gentleman, do you?"

"I have seen nothing that would rob him of the title," said Miss

Loring.

"A true gentleman will put on a gentlemanly exterior; for he is

courteous by instinct--and especially when ladies are present. A

true gentleman, moreover, is always at his ease. Self-possession is

one of the signs of a well bred man. Hendrickson is not well bred.

Any one who has been at all in society, can perceive this at a

glance. Did you notice how he played with his watch chain; crossed

his legs in sitting; took out his pencil case, and moved the slide

noisily backwards and forwards; ran his fingers through his hair;

exhibited his pocket-handkerchief half-a-dozen times in as many

minutes, and went through sundry other performances of which no well

bred man is guilty? I marvel, that a young lady of your refinement

can offer a word of apology for such things. I see in it only

kindness of heart; and this shall be your excuse."

So gaily were the closing sentences uttered; yet with so manifest a

regard softening the final words, that Miss Loring's rising anger

against the young man, went down and was extinguished in a pleasing

consciousness of being an object of marked favor by one whose

external attractions, at least, were of the highest order.

"But the subject is not agreeable to either of us, Miss Loring,"

said Dexter in a voice pitched to a lower tone, and with a softer

modulation. "I did not expect to find a visitor here at so early an

hour; and I fear that I have permitted myself to experience just a

shade of annoyance. If I have seemed ill-natured, pardon me. It is

not my nature to find fault, or to criticise. I rather prefer

looking upon the bright side. Like Sir Joshua Reynolds, 'I am a wide

liker.' There are times, you know, in which we are all tempted to

act in a way that gives to others a false impression of our real

characters."

"No one is more conscious of that than I am," replied Miss Loring.

"Indeed, it seems often, as if I were made the sport of adverse

influences, and constrained to act and to appear wholly different

from what I desire to seem. There are some of life's phenomena, Mr.

Dexter, that puzzle at times my poor brain sorely."

"Don't puzzle over such things, Miss Loring," said Mr. Dexter; "I

never do. Leave mysteries to philosophers; there is quite enough of

enjoyment upon the surface of things without diving below, into the

dark caverns of doubt and vague speculation. I never liked the word

phenomenon."

"To me it has ever been an attraction. I always seem standing at

some closed door, hearkening to vague sounds within and longing to

enter. The outer life presents itself to me as moving figures in a

show, and I am all impatient, at times, to discover the hidden

machinery that gives such wonderful motion.

"Morbid; all morbid!" answered Dexter, in a lively manner. "Dreams

in the place of realities, Miss Loring. Don't philosophize; don't

speculate; don't think--at least not seriously. Your thinkers are

always miserable. Take life as it is--full of beauty, full of

pleasure. The sources of enjoyment are all around us. Let us drink

at them and be thankful."

"You are a philosopher, I perceive," said Miss Loring, with a smile,

"and must have been a thinker, in some degree, to have formed a

theory."

"I am a cheerful philosopher."

"Are you always cheerful, Mr. Dexter?" inquired Miss Loring.

"Always."

"Never feel the pressure of gloomy states? Have no transitions of

feeling--sudden, unaccountable; as if the shadow of a cloud had

fallen over your spirit?"

"Never."

"You are singularly fortunate."

"Am I, Miss Loring?" and the young man's voice grew tender as he

leaned nearer to the maiden.

"I am blessed with a cheerful temper," he added, "and I cultivate

the inheritance. It is a good gift--blessing both the inheritor and

his companions. Neither men nor women are long gloomy in my

presence."

"I have often noticed your smiling face and pleasant words," said

Jessie, "and wondered if you moved always in a sunny atmosphere."

"You are answered now," he replied.

A little while there was silence. Jessie did not feel the repulsion

which had at first made Dexter's presence annoying; and as he drew

his chair closer, and leaned still nearer, there was on her part no

instinctive receding.

"Yes," she murmured softly, almost dreamily, "I am answered."

"Jessie." The young man's breath was on her cheek--his hand touching

her hand. She remained sitting very still--still as an effigy.

"Jessie." How very low, and loving, and musical was the voice that

thrilled along the chords of feeling! "Jessie; forgive me if I have

mistaken the signs." His hand tightened upon hers. She felt

spell-bound. She wished to start up and flee. But she could not.

There was a strange, overshadowing, half paralyzing power in the

man's presence. Without a purpose to do so, she returned the

pressure of his hand. It was enough.

"Thanks, dear one!" he murmured. "I was sure I had not mistaken the

signs. The heart has language all its own."

Still the maiden's form was motionless; and her hand lay passive in

the hand that now held it with a strong clasp. Yet, how wildly did

her heart beat! How tumultuous were all her feelings! How delicious

the thrill that pervaded her being!

"I love you, Jessie! Dear one! Angel! And by this token you are

mine!" said Dexter, his voice full of passion's fine enthusiasm. And

he raised her hand to his lips, kissing it half-wildly as he did so.

"The gods have made this hour propitious!" he added, as he drew her

head down against his bosom, and laid his ardent lips to hers.

"Bless you, darling! Bless you!" he went on. "My life is crowned

this hour with its chiefest delight! Mine! mine!"

Yet, not a word had parted the maiden's lips, thus spirited away, as

it were, out of herself, and strangely betrayed into consenting

silence. She had neither given her yea nor her nay--and dared as

little to speak the one as the other.

Almost bereft of physical power, she sat with her face hidden

on the bosom of this impulsive lover, for many minutes. At last,

thought cleared itself a little, and, with a more distinct

self-consciousness, were restored individuality and strength. She

raised herself, moved back a little, and looked up into the face of

Mr. Dexter. The aspect of her own was not just what the young man

had expected to see. He did not look upon a countenance blushing in

sweet confusion; nor into eyes radiant with loving glances; but upon

a pale face, and eyes whose meanings were a mystery. Slowly, yet

persistently, did she withdraw her hand from his clasp, while slowly

her form arose, until it gained an erect position.

"You have taken me off my guard, Mr. Dexter," she said, a tremor

running through her voice.

"Say not a word, Jessie! say not a word! I am only too happy to have

taken your heart captive. You are none the less my own, whether the

means were force or stratagem."

"Speak not too confidently, sir. Have I"--

Mr. Dexter raised his hand quickly, and uttered a word of warning.

But were silent again. Then the young man said, his manner growing

deferential, and his voice falling to a low and subdued tone--

"Miss Loring, I here offer you heart and hand; and in making this

offer, do most solemnly affirm that you are precious to me as

life.--The highest boon I can crave from heaven is the gift of your

dear self."

As he spoke, he extended his hand towards her. But her own did not

stir from her lap, where it lay as still as if paralyzed.

"This is no light matter, Mr. Dexter," she said; still with the

huskiness and tremor which had before veiled her voice. "I cannot

decide on a thing of such infinite moment, in hot blood and on the

spur of a sudden occasion. You must give me time for reflection."

"The heart knows no time. It neither reasons nor deliberates; but

speaks out upon the instant, as yours has already done, Miss

Loring," replied Dexter, with reviving ardor.

"Time, Mr. Dexter, time! I must have time!" said Jessie, almost

imploringly.

But Dexter, who saw that time might turn the scale against him,

resolved to press his suit then to the final issue.

"I cannot accept delay," he answered, throwing the most winning

tenderness into his voice. "And why should you hesitate a moment?"

"My aunt"--murmured Jessie.

"Consult her with all maidenly formality. That is right--that is

prudent," he said, leaning again very near to her. "But, ere we

separate this morning, let me ask one question--I am not

disagreeable to you?"

"Oh, no, no, Mr. Dexter!" was the quick, earnest reply.

"Nor is your heart given to another?"

"No lips but yours have ever uttered such words as have sounded in

my ears this day."

"And no lips, speaking in your ears, can ever utter such words with

half the heart-warmth that were in mine, dear Jessie! True love is

ever ardent, and cannot wait. I must have a sign from you before I

leave. You need not speak; but lay your hand in mine," and he

reached his hand towards her.

It was a moment of strong trial. Again her thoughts fell into

confusion. Again a wild delicious thrill swept like a strain of

music through all her being. She was within the sphere of an

irresistible attraction. Her hand fluttered with a sudden impulse,

and then, moving towards the hand of Dexter, was seized and covered

with kisses.

"Thanks, dearest!" he murmured. "Thanks! By this token I know that I

am loved--by this token you are mine--mine forever! Happy, happy

day! It shall be the golden one in all the calendar of my life."

With the ardor of passion he drew her to his side again, and

clasping his arm around her, kissed her with all the fervor of an

entranced lover--kissed her over and over again, wildly.

All this was not mere acting on the part of Mr. Dexter. He did love

the sweet young girl as truly as men of his peculiar character are

capable of loving. He was deeply in earnest. There was a charm about

Jessie Loring which had captivated him in the beginning. She was

endowed with rich mental gifts, as well as personal beauty; and with

both, Dexter was charmed even to fascination. Superficial, vain of

his person, and self-satisfied from his position, he had not been

much troubled by doubts touching his ability to secure the hand of

Miss Loring, and by his very boldness and ardor, won his suit ere

she had sufficient warning of his purpose to throw a mail-clad

garment around her.

Dexter remained for only a short period after this ardent

declaration. He had penetration enough to see that Miss Loring was

profoundly disturbed, and that she desired to be alone. He saw with

concern that her countenance was losing its fine warmth, and that

the lustre of her eyes was failing. Her look was becoming more

inverted each moment. She was trying to read her heart, and

understand the writing inscribed thereon.

"I will see you this evening, Jessie," said Mr. Dexter, on rising to

depart. Their intercourse had already been touched with a shade of

embarrassment.

Miss Loring forced a smile and simply inclined her head. He bent

forward and kissed her. Passively--almost coldly was the salute

received. Then they parted. A film of ice had already formed itself

between them.

The Hand but Not the Heart; Or, The Life-Trials of Jessie Loring · 第 3 / 28 章