"What is it?" asked Wilton, returning alarmed, for conscience had made
him a coward.
"There!" Kenrick only pointed to the purse lying on the floor.
"Oh, don't ask me to touch it again, the money is in it," said Wilton,
hastily leaving the room. There was no acting here; it was plain that
he was penitent--plain that he would have given worlds not to have been
guilty of the sin.
Very sadly, and with pain and doubt, Kenrick thought the matter over,
and thus much at least was clear to him: first, that the house must be
informed, though not necessarily the masters or the other boys;
secondly, that Wilton must make full and immediate restitution to all
from whom he had stolen; thirdly, there could be no doubt about it, that
Wilton must get himself removed at once. On these conditions he thought
it possible that the matter might be hushed up; but his conscience was
uneasy on this point. That unlucky threat or hint of Wilton's, that he
could and would tell some of his wrong-doings, was his great
stumbling-block; whenever extreme pity influenced him to screen the poor
boy from full exposure, he began to ask himself whether this was a mere
cowardly alternative suggested by his own fears. But for this, he would
have determined at once on the more lenient and merciful course; but he
had to face this question of self-interest very earnestly, nor could he
come to any conclusion about it until he had determined to take a step
in all respects worthy of the highest side of his character, by going,
in any case, spontaneously to Dr Lane and laying before him a frank
confession of past delinquencies, leaving him to act as he thought fit.
Having thus disentangled the question from all its personal bearings he
was able to review it on its merits, and went to ask the counsel of
Whalley, to whom he related, in confidence, the whole scene exactly as
it had occurred. Whalley, too, on hearing the alternative conditions
which Kenrick had planned, was fully inclined to spare Wilton as much as
possible, but, as neither of them felt satisfied to do this on their own
authority, they sought Power's advice and, as he too felt very doubtful
on the matter, he suggested that they should put it to Dr Lane, without
mentioning any names, _as a hypothetical case_, and be finally guided by
his directions.
Accordingly Kenrick sought Dr Lane's study, and laid the entire
difficulty before him. He listened attentively, and said, "If the boy
is so young, and has been, as you say, misled, and accepts the very
sensible conditions which you have proposed, I am inclined to think that
the course you have suggested will be the wisest and the kindest one.
You have my full authority, Kenrick, to arrange it so, and I am happy to
tell you that you have behaved throughout this matter in an honourable
and straightforward way."
"I fear, sir, I very little deserve your approval," said Kenrick, with
downcast eyes. "In coming to ask your advice in this case, I wanted
also to say that I have gone so far wrong that I think you ought to be
told how badly I have behaved. It may be that after what I say, you may
not think right to allow me to stay here, sir; but at any rate I shall
have disburdened my own conscience by telling you, and shall perhaps
feel less wretched."
"My dear Kenrick," said Dr Lane, "it was a right and a brave thing of
you to come here for this purpose. Confession is often the first, as it
is one of the most trying parts of repentance; and I hail this as a new
proof of your strong and steady desire to amend. But tell me nothing,
my dear boy. It may be that I know more than you suppose; at any rate,
I accept the will for the deed, and wish to hear no more, unless,
indeed, you desire to consult me as a clergyman, and as your spiritual
adviser, rather than as your master. I do not seek this confidence;
only if there is anything on your conscience of which my advice may help
to relieve you, I do not _forbid_ you to proceed, and I will give you
what help I can."
"I think it would relieve me, sir," said Kenrick; "I have no father; I
have, I am sorry to say, no friend in the school to whom I could speak."
"Then sit down, Kenrick, and be assured beforehand of my real sympathy."
He sat down, and, twitching nervously at the ribbon of his straw hat,
told Dr Lane much of the history of the last two years, confessing,
above all, how badly he had behaved as head of the house, and how much
harm he feared his example had done.
Dr Lane did not attempt to extenuate the heinousness of his offence,
but he pointed out to him what were the fruits and the means of
repentance. He exhorted him to let the sense of his past errors
stimulate him to double future exertions. He told him of many ways in
which, by kindness, by moral courage, by Christian principle, he might
be a help and a blessing to other boys. He earnestly warned him to look
to God for strength, and to watch and pray lest he should enter into
temptation. And then promising him a full and free oblivion of the
past, he knelt down with him and offered up from an overflowing heart a
few words of earnest prayer.
"There is nothing like prayer to relieve the heart, Kenrick," said Dr
Lane; "and now, good-night, and God bless you!"
With a far lighter heart, with far brighter hopes, Kenrick left him,
feeling as if a great burden had been rolled away, and inwardly blessing
the doctor for his comforting kindness. He found Wilton anxiously
awaiting his arrival in his study; and thinking that their cases in some
respects resembled each other, he strove not to be like the unforgiving
debtor of the parable, and spoke to Wilton with great gentleness.
"Come here, my poor child; first of all, let me tell you that you shall
not be reported." Wilton repaid him by a look of grateful joy.
"But you must restore all the stolen money, Wilton; the house must be
told privately; and you must leave at once."
"Well, Kenrick, I ask only one favour," said Wilton, after a short
pause.
"What is that?"
"That the house may not be told who stole the money until it is nearly
time for me to go."
"No; it shall be kept close till then, otherwise the next fortnight
would be too hard for you to bear."
"But _must_ I leave?" asked Wilton, appealingly.
"It must be so, Wilton; _I_ shall be sorry for you, but it must be
settled so. Can you manage it?"
"O yes," said Wilton, crying quietly; "I'll write home and tell my poor
mother all about it, and then of course she'll send me some money and
take me away at once, to save me from being expelled. My poor mother,
how wretched it will make her!"
"Sin makes us all wretched, Raven boy. I'm sure it makes me wretched
enough. And that you mayn't think that fear has had anything to do with
our letting you off, I must tell you, Wilton, that I've been to Dr Lane
himself and told him all the many sins I've been guilty of."
"Have you? Oh! I'm so sorry; it was all through me."
"Yes; but I'm not sorry; I'm all the happier for it, Raven. There's
nothing so miserable as undiscovered sin--is there?"
"Oh, indeed, there isn't. I'm sure I feel happier now in spite of all.
No one knows, Ken, how I've suffered this last fortnight. I've been in
a perpetual fright; I've had fearful dreams; I've felt ready to sink for
shame; and I've always been fancying that fellows suspected me. Do you
know, I am almost glad you caught me, Ken. I'm _very_ glad it was you
and no one else, though it was a _horrid, horrid_ moment when you laid
your hand on my shoulder. Yet even this isn't so bad as to have gone on
nursing the guilt secretly, and not to have been detected."
Kenrick was musing; the boy who could talk like that was clearly one who
_might_ have been, very unlike what Wilton then was.
"Wilton," he said, "come here and draw your chair by mine while I read
you a little story."
"O Ken, I'm so grateful that you don't hate and despise me though I am
a--"; he murmured the word "thief" with a shudder, and under his breath,
as he drew up his chair, and Kenrick read to him in a low voice the
story of Achan, till he came to the verses--
"And Achan, the son of Carmi, the son of Zabdi, the son of Zerah, of the
tribe of Judah, was taken.
"And Joshua said, _My son, give, I pray thee, glory to the Lord God of
Israel, and make confession unto him_; and tell me now what thou hast
done, hide it not from me.
"And Achan answered Joshua and said, Indeed I have sinned against the
Lord God of Israel, and thus and thus have I done."
And there Kenrick stopped, while Wilton said, "My son! You see Joshua
still called him `my son' in spite of all his sin and mischief."
"Yes, Raven boy, but that wasn't why I read you the story which has
often struck me. What I wanted you to see was this: The man was
detected--the thing had been coming, creeping horribly near to him;
first his tribe marked by the fatal lot, then his family, then his
house, then himself; and while he's standing there, guilty and detected,
in the very midst of that crowd who had been defeated because of his
baseness, and when all their eyes were scowling on him, and when he
knows that he, and his sons, and his daughters, are going to be burned
and stoned--at this very moment Joshua says to him, `My son, _give, I
pray thee, glory to the God of Israel_.' You see he's to _thank God_
for detecting him--thank God even at that frightful moment, and with
that frightful death before him as a consequence. One would have
thought that it wasn't a matter for much gratitude or jubilation; but
you see it _was_, and so both Joshua and Achan seem to have admitted."
"Ah, Kenrick!" said Wilton, sadly, "if you'd always talked to me like
that, I shouldn't be like Achan now."
Kenrick said nothing, but as he had received infinite comfort from Dr
Lane's treatment of himself, he took Wilton by the hand, and, without
saying a word, knelt down. Wilton knelt down beside him, and he prayed
for forgiveness for them both. A few broken, confused, uncertain words
only, but they were earnest, and they came fresh and burning from the
heart. They were words of true prayer, and the poor, erring, hardened
little boy rose from his knees too overcome to speak.