CHAPTER VII. SUICIDE

In the month of May Vandenesse took his wife, as usual, to their

country-seat, where she was consoled by the passionate letters she

received from Raoul, to whom she wrote every day.

Marie’s absence might have saved Raoul from the gulf into which he was

falling, if Florine had been near him; but, unfortunately, he was alone

in the midst of friends who had become his enemies from the moment that

he showed his intention of ruling them. His staff of writers hated him

“pro tem.,” ready to hold out a hand to him and console him in case of

a fall, ready to adore him in case of success. So goes the world of

literature. No one is really liked but an inferior. Every man’s hand

is against him who is likely to rise. This wide-spread envy doubles the

chances of common minds who excite neither envy nor suspicion, who

make their way like moles, and, fools though they be, find themselves

gazetted in the “Moniteur,” for three or four places, while men of

talent are still struggling at the door to keep each other out.

The underhand enmity of these pretended friends, which Florine would

have scented with the innate faculty of a courtesan to get at truth amid

a thousand misleading circumstances, was by no means Raoul’s greatest

danger. His partners, Massol the lawyer, and du Tillet the banker, had

intended from the first to harness his ardor to the chariot of their own

importance and get rid of him as soon as he was out of condition to feed

the paper, or else to deprive him of his power, arbitrarily, whenever

it suited their purpose to take it. To them Nathan represented a certain

amount of talent to use up, a literary force of the motive power of ten

pens to employ. Massol, one of those lawyers who mistake the faculty

of endless speech for eloquence, who possess the art of boring by

diffusiveness, the torment of all meetings and assemblies where

they belittle everything, and who desire to become personages at any

cost,--Massol no longer wanted the place as Keeper of the Seals; he

had seen some five or six different men go through that office in four

years, and the robes disgusted him. In exchange, his mind was now set on

obtaining a chair on the Board of Education and a place in the Council

of State; the whole adorned with the cross of the Legion of honor. Du

Tillet and Nucingen had guaranteed the cross to him, and the office of

Master of Petitions provided he obeyed them blindly.

The better to deceive Raoul, these men allowed him to manage the paper

without control. Du Tillet used it only for his stock-gambling, about

which Nathan understood next to nothing; but he had given, through

Nucingen, an assurance to Rastignac that the paper would be tacitly

obliging to the government on the sole condition of supporting his

candidacy for Monsieur de Nucingen’s place as soon as he was nominated

peer of France. Raoul was thus being undermined by the banker and the

lawyer, who saw him with much satisfaction lording it in the newspaper,

profiting by all advantages, and harvesting the fruits of self-love,

while Nathan, enchanted, believed them to be, as on the occasion of his

equestrian wants, the best fellows in the world. He thought he managed

them! Men of imagination, to whom hope is the basis of existence, never

allow themselves to know that the most perilous moment in their affairs

is that when all seems going well according to their wishes.

This was a period of triumph by which Nathan profited. He appeared as a

personage in the world, political and financial. Du Tillet presented him

to the Nucingens. Madame de Nucingen received him cordially, less for

himself than for Madame de Vandenesse; but when she ventured a few

words about the countess he thought himself marvellously clever in using

Florine as a shield; he alluded to his relations with the actress in a

tone of generous self-conceit. How could he desert a great devotion, for

the coquetries of the faubourg Saint-Germain?

Nathan, manipulated by Nucingen and Rastignac, by du Tillet and Blondet,

gave his support ostentatiously to the “doctrinaires” of their new and

ephemeral cabinet. But in order to show himself pure of all bribery he

refused to take advantage of certain profitable enterprises which

were started by means of his paper,--he! who had no reluctance in

compromising friends or in behaving with little decency to mechanics

under certain circumstances. Such meannesses, the result of vanity

and of ambition, are found in many lives like his. The mantle must be

splendid before the eyes of the world, and we steal our friend’s or a

poor man’s cloth to patch it.

Nevertheless, two months after the departure of the countess, Raoul had

a certain Rabelaisian “quart d’heure” which caused him some anxiety in

the midst of these triumphs. Du Tillet had advanced a hundred thousand

francs, Florine’s money had gone in the costs of the first establishment

of the paper, which were enormous. It was necessary to provide for the

future. The banker agreed to let the editor have fifty thousand francs

on notes for four months. Du Tillet thus held Raoul by the halter of an

IOU. By means of this relief the funds of the paper were secured for six

months. In the eyes of some writers six months is an eternity.

Besides, by dint of advertising and by offering illusory advantages to

subscribers two thousand had been secured; an influx of travellers added

to this semi-success, which was enough, perhaps, to excuse the throwing

of more bank-bills after the rest. A little more display of talent, a

timely political trial or crisis, an apparent persecution, and Raoul

felt certain of becoming one of those modern “condottieri” whose ink is

worth more than powder and shot of the olden time.

This loan from du Tillet was already made when Florine returned with

fifty thousand francs. Instead of creating a savings fund with that sum,

Raoul, certain of success (simply because he felt it was necessary),

and already humiliated at having accepted the actress’s money, deceived

Florine as to his actual position, and persuaded her to employ the money

in refurnishing her house. The actress, who did not need persuasion,

not only spent the sum in hand, but she burdened herself with a debt of

thirty thousand francs, with which she obtained a charming little house

all to herself in the rue Pigale, whither her old society resorted.

Raoul had reserved the production of his great piece, in which was

a part especially suited to Florine, until her return. This

comedy-vaudeville was to be Raoul’s farewell to the stage. The

newspapers, with that good nature which costs nothing, prepared the way

for such an ovation to Florine that even the Theatre-Francais talked of

engaging her. The feuilletons proclaimed her the heiress of Mars.

This triumph was sufficiently dazzling to prevent Florine from carefully

studying the ground on which Nathan was advancing; she lived, for the

time being, in a round of festivities and glory. According to those

about her, he was now a great political character; he was justified in

his enterprise; he would certainly be a deputy, probably a minister in

course of time, like so many others. As for Nathan himself, he firmly

believed that in the next session of the Chamber he should find himself

in government with two other journalists, one of whom, already a

minister, was anxious to associate some of his own craft with himself,

and so consolidate his power. After a separation of six months, Nathan

met Florine again with pleasure, and returned easily to his old way of

life. All his comforts came from the actress, but he embroidered the

heavy tissue of his life with the flowers of ideal passion; his letters

to Marie were masterpieces of grace and style. Nathan made her the

light of his life; he undertook nothing without consulting his “guardian

angel.” In despair at being on the popular side, he talked of going over

to that of the aristocracy; but, in spite of his habitual agility,

even he saw the absolute impossibility of such a jump; it was easier

to become a minister. Marie’s precious replies were deposited in one

of those portfolios with patent locks made by Huret or Fichet, two

mechanics who were then waging war in advertisements and posters all

over Paris, as to which could make the safest and most impenetrable

locks.

This portfolio was left about in Florine’s new boudoir, where Nathan did

much of his work. No one is easier to deceive than a woman to whom a man

is in the habit of telling everything; she has no suspicions; she thinks

she sees and hears and knows all. Besides, since her return, Nathan had

led the most regular of lives under her very nose. Never did she

imagine that that portfolio, which she hardly glanced at as it lay there

unconcealed, contained the letters of a rival, treasures of admiring

love which the countess addressed, at Raoul’s request, to the office of

his newspaper.

Nathan’s situation was, therefore, to all appearance, extremely

brilliant. He had many friends. The two plays lately produced had

succeeded well, and their proceeds supplied his personal wants and

relieved him of all care for the future. His debt to du Tillet, “his

friend,” did not make him in the least uneasy.

“Why distrust a friend?” he said to Blondet, who from time to time

would cast a doubt on his position, led to do so by his general habit of

analyzing.

“But we don’t need to distrust our enemies,” remarked Florine.

Nathan defended du Tillet; he was the best, the most upright of men.

This existence, which was really that of a dancer on the tight rope

without his balance-pole, would have alarmed any one, even the most

indifferent, had it been seen as it really was. Du Tillet watched it

with the cool eye and the cynicism of a parvenu. Through the friendly

good humor of his intercourse with Raoul there flashed now and then a

malignant jeer. One day, after pressing his hand in Florine’s boudoir

and watching him as he got into his carriage, du Tillet remarked to

Lousteau (envier par excellence):--

“That fellow is off to the Bois in fine style to-day, but he is just as

likely, six months hence, to be in a debtor’s prison.”

“He? never!” cried Lousteau. “He has Florine.”

“How do you know that he’ll keep her? As for you, who are worth a

dozen of him, I predict that you will be our editor-in-chief within six

months.”

In October Nathan’s notes to du Tillet fell due, and the banker

graciously renewed them, but for two months only, with the discount

added and a fresh loan. Sure of victory, Raoul was not afraid of

continuing to put his hand in the bag. Madame Felix de Vandenesse was

to return in a few days, a month earlier than usual, brought back, of

course, by her unconquerable desire to see Nathan, who felt that he

could not be short of money at a time when he renewed that assiduous

life.

Correspondence, in which the pen is always bolder than speech, and

thought, wreathing itself with flowers, allows itself to be seen without

disguise, and brought the countess to the highest pitch of enthusiasm.

She believed she saw in Raoul one of the noblest spirits of the epoch,

a delicate but misjudged heart without a stain and worthy of adoration;

she saw him advancing with a brave hand to grasp the sceptre of power.

Soon that speech so beautiful in love would echo from the tribune. Marie

now lived only in this life of a world outside her own. Her taste was

lost for the tranquil joys of home, and she gave herself up to the

agitations of this whirlwind life communicated by a clever and adoring

pen. She kissed Raoul’s letters, written in the midst of the ceaseless

battles of the press, with time taken from necessary studies; she felt

their value; she was certain of being loved, and loved only, with no

rival but the fame and ambition he adored. She found enough in her

country solitude to fill her soul and employ her faculties,--happy,

indeed, to have been so chosen by such a man, who to her was an angel.

During the last days of autumn Marie and Raoul again met and renewed

their walks in the Bois, where alone they could see each other until

the salons reopened. But when the winter fairly began, Raoul appeared in

social life at his apogee. He was almost a personage. Rastignac, now

out of power with the ministry, which went to pieces on the death of de

Marsay, leaned upon Nathan, and gave him in return the warmest praise.

Madame de Vandenesse, feeling this change in public opinion, was

desirous of knowing if her husband’s judgment had altered also. She

questioned him again; perhaps with the hope of obtaining one of those

brilliant revenges which please all women, even the noblest and least

worldly,--for may we not believe that even the angels retain some

portion of their self-love as they gather in serried ranks before the

Holy of Holies?

“Nothing was wanting to Raoul Nathan but to be the dupe he now is to a

parcel of intriguing sharpers,” replied the count.

Felix, whose knowledge of the world and politics enabled him to judge

clearly, had seen Nathan’s true position. He explained to his wife that

Fieschi’s attempt had resulted in attaching to the interests threatened

by this attack on Louis-Philippe a large body of hitherto lukewarm

persons. The newspapers which were non-committal, and did not show their

colors, would lose subscribers; for journalism, like politics, was about

to be simplified by falling into regular lines. If Nathan had put his

whole fortune into that newspaper he would lose it. This judgment,

so apparently just and clear-cut, though brief and given by a man

who fathomed a matter in which he had no interest, alarmed Madame de

Vandenesse.

“Do you take an interest in him?” asked her husband.

“Only as a man whose mind interests me and whose conversation I like.”

This reply was made so naturally that the count suspected nothing.

The next day at four o’clock, Marie and Raoul had a long conversation

together, in a low voice, in Madame d’Espard’s salon. The countess

expressed fears which Raoul dissipated, only too happy to destroy

by epigrams the conjugal judgment. Nathan had a revenge to take. He

characterized the count as narrow-minded, behind the age, a man who

judged the revolution of July with the eyes of the Restoration, who

would never be willing to admit the triumph of the middle-classes--the

new force of all societies, whether temporary or lasting, but a real

force. Instead of turning his mind to the study of an opinion given

impartially and incidentally by a man well-versed in politics, Raoul

mounted his stilts and stalked about in the purple of his own glory.

Where is the woman who would not have believed his glowing talk sooner

than the cold logic of her husband? Madame de Vandenesse, completely

reassured, returned to her life of little enjoyments, clandestine

pressures of the hand, occasional quarrels,--in short, to her

nourishment of the year before, harmless in itself, but likely to drag a

woman over the border if the man she favors is resolute and impatient

of obstacles. Happily for her, Nathan was not dangerous. Besides, he

was too full of his immediate self-interests to think at this time of

profiting by his love.

But toward the end of December, when the second notes fell due, du

Tillet demanded payment. The rich banker, who said he was embarrassed,

advised Raoul to borrow the money for a short time from a usurer, from

Gigonnet, the providence of all young men who were pressed for money. In

January, he remarked, the renewal of subscriptions to the paper would be

coming in, there would be plenty of money in hand, and they could then

see what had best be done. Besides, couldn’t Nathan write a play? As a

matter of pride Raoul determined to pay off the notes at once. Du Tillet

gave Raoul a letter to Gigonnet, who counted out the money on a note of

Nathan’s at twenty days’ sight. Instead of asking himself the reason of

such unusual facility, Raoul felt vexed at his folly in not having asked

for more. That is how men who are truly remarkable for the power of

thought are apt to behave in practical business; they seem to reserve

the power of their mind for their writings, and are fearful of lessening

it by putting it to use in the daily affairs of life.

Raoul related his morning to Florine and Blondet. He gave them an

inimitable sketch of Gigonnet, his fireplace without fire, his shabby

wall-paper, his stairway, his asthmatic bell, his aged straw mattress,

his den without warmth, like his eye. He made them laugh about this

new uncle; they neither troubled themselves about du Tillet and his

pretended want of money, nor about an old usurer so ready to disburse.

What was there to worry about in that?

“He has only asked you fifteen per cent,” said Blondet; “you ought to

be grateful to him. At twenty-five per cent you don’t bow to those old

fellows. This is money-lending; usury doesn’t begin till fifty per cent;

and then you despise the usurer.”

“Despise him!” cried Florine; “if any of your friends lent you money at

that price they’d pose as your benefactors.”

“She is right; and I am glad I don’t owe anything now to du Tillet,”

said Raoul.

Why this lack of penetration as to their personal affairs in men whose

business it is to penetrate all things? Perhaps the mind cannot be

complete at all points; perhaps artists of every kind live too much in

the present moment to study the future; perhaps they are too observant

of the ridiculous to notice snares, or they may believe that none would

dare to lay a snare for such as they. However this may be, the future

arrived in due time. Twenty days later Raoul’s notes were protested, but

Florine obtained from the Court of commerce an extension of twenty-five

days in which to meet them. Thus pressed, Raoul looked into his affairs

and asked for the accounts, and it then appeared that the receipts

of the newspaper covered only two-thirds of the expenses, while the

subscriptions were rapidly dwindling. The great man now grew anxious

and gloomy, but to Florine only, in whom he confided. She advised him to

borrow money on unwritten plays, and write them at once, giving a lien

on his work. Nathan followed this advice and obtained thereby twenty

thousand francs, which reduced his debt to forty thousand.

On the 10th of February the twenty-five days expired. Du Tillet, who did

not want Nathan as a rival before the electoral college, where he meant

to appear himself, instigated Gigonnet to sue Nathan without compromise.

A man locked up for debt could not present himself as a candidate for

election. Florine was herself in communication with the sheriff on the

subject of her personal debts, and no resource was left to her but the

“I” of Medea, for her new furniture and belongings were now attached.

The ambitious Raoul heard the cracking in all directions of his

prosperous edifice, built, alas! without foundations. His nerve failed

him; too weak already to sustain so vast an enterprise, he felt himself

incapable of attempting to build it up again; he was fated to perish in

its ashes. Love for the countess gave him still a few thrills of life;

his mask brightened for a moment, but behind it hope was dead. He did

not suspect the hand of du Tillet, and laid the blame of his misfortune

on the usurer. Rastignac, Blondet, Lousteau, Vernou, Finot, and Massol

took care not to enlighten him. Rastignac, who wanted to return to

power, made common cause with Nucingen and du Tillet. The others felt

a satisfaction in the catastrophe of an equal who had attempted to make

himself their master. None of them, however, would have said a word to

Florine; on the contrary, they praised Raoul to her.

“Nathan,” they said, “has the shoulders of an Atlas; he’ll pull himself

through; all will come right.”

“There were two new subscribers yesterday,” said Blondet, gravely.

“Raoul will certainly be elected deputy. As soon as the budget is voted

the dissolution is sure to take place.”

But Nathan, sued, could no longer obtain even usury; Florine, with all

her personal property attached, could count on nothing but inspiring a

passion in some fool who might not appear at the right moment. Nathan’s

friends were all men without money and without credit. An arrest for

debt would destroy his hopes of a political career; and besides all

this, he had bound himself to do an immense amount of dramatic work for

which he had already received payment. He could see no bottom to the

gulf of misery that lay before him, into which he was about to roll. In

presence of such threatened evil his boldness deserted him. Would the

Comtesse de Vandenesse stand by him? Would she fly with him? Women are

never led into a gulf of that kind except by an absolute love, and the

love of Raoul and Marie had not bound them together by the mysterious

and inalienable ties of happiness. But supposing that the countess did

follow him to some foreign country; she would come without fortune,

despoiled of everything, and then, alas! she would merely be one more

embarrassment to him. A mind of a second order, and a proud mind like

that of Nathan, would be likely to see, under these circumstances, and

did see, in suicide the sword to cut the Gordian knots. The idea of

failure in the face of the world and that society he had so lately

entered and meant to rule, of leaving the chariot of the countess and

becoming once more a muddied pedestrian, was more than he could bear.

Madness began to dance and whirl and shake her bells at the gates of the

fantastic palace in which the poet had been dreaming. In this extremity,

Nathan waited for some lucky accident, determined not to kill himself

until the final moment.

During the last days employed by the legal formalities required before

proceeding to arrest for debt, Raoul went about, in spite of himself,

with that coldly sullen and morose expression of face which may be

noticed in persons who are either fated to commit suicide or are

meditating it. The funereal ideas they are turning over in their minds

appear upon their foreheads in gray and cloudy tints, their smile has

something fatalistic in it, their motions are solemn. These unhappy

beings seem to want to suck the last juices of the life they mean to

leave; their eyes see things invisible, their ears are listening to a

death-knell, they pay no attention to the minor things about them. These

alarming symptoms Marie perceived one evening at Lady Dudley’s. Raoul

was sitting apart on a sofa in the boudoir, while the rest of the

company were conversing in the salon. The countess went to the door, but

he did not raise his head; he heard neither Marie’s breathing nor the

rustle of her silk dress; he was gazing at a flower in the carpet, with

fixed eyes, stupid with grief; he felt he had rather die than abdicate.

All the world can’t have the rock of Saint Helena for a pedestal.

Moreover, suicide was then the fashion in Paris. Is it not, in fact, the

last resource of all atheistical societies? Raoul, as he sat there, had

decided that the moment had come to die. Despair is in proportion to our

hopes; that of Raoul had no other issue than the grave.

“What is the matter?” cried Marie, flying to him.

“Nothing,” he answered.

There is one way of saying that word “nothing” between lovers which

signifies its exact contrary. Marie shrugged her shoulders.

“You are a child,” she said. “Some misfortune has happened to you.”

“No, not to me,” he replied. “But you will know all soon enough, Marie,”

he added, affectionately.

“What were you thinking of when I came in?” she asked, in a tone of

authority.

“Do you want to know the truth?” She nodded. “I was thinking of you; I

was saying to myself that most men in my place would have wanted to be

loved without reserve. I am loved, am I not?”

“Yes,” she answered.

“And yet,” he said, taking her round the waist and kissing her forehead

at the risk of being seen, “I leave you pure and without remorse. I

could have dragged you into an abyss, but you remain in all your glory

on its brink without a stain. Yet one thought troubles me--”

“What is it?” she asked.

“You will despise me.” She smiled superbly. “Yes, you will never believe

that I have sacredly loved you; I shall be disgraced, I know that. Women

never imagine that from the depths of our mire we raise our eyes to

heaven and truly adore a Marie. They assail that sacred love with

miserable doubts; they cannot believe that men of intellect and poesy

can so detach their soul from earthly enjoyment as to lay it pure upon

some cherished altar. And yet, Marie, the worship of the ideal is more

fervent in men then in women; we find it in women, who do not even look

for it in us.”

“Why are you making me that article?” she said, jestingly.

“I am leaving France; and you will hear to-morrow, how and why, from a

letter my valet will bring you. Adieu, Marie.”

Raoul left the house after again straining the countess to his heart

with dreadful pressure, leaving her stupefied and distressed.

“What is the matter, my dear?” said Madame d’Espard, coming to look for

her. “What has Monsieur Nathan been saying to you? He has just left

us in a most melodramatic way. Perhaps you are too reasonable or too

unreasonable with him.”

The countess got into a hackney-coach and was driven rapidly to the

newspaper office. At that hour the huge apartments which they occupied

in an old mansion in the rue Feydeau were deserted; not a soul was there

but the watchman, who was greatly surprised to see a young and pretty

woman hurrying through the rooms in evident distress. She asked him to

tell her where was Monsieur Nathan.

“At Mademoiselle Florine’s, probably,” replied the man, taking Marie for

a rival who intended to make a scene.

“Where does he work?”

“In his office, the key of which he carries in his pocket.”

“I wish to go there.”

The man took her to a dark little room looking out on a rear court-yard.

The office was at right angles. Opening the window of the room she was

in, the countess could look through into the window of the office, and

she saw Nathan sitting there in the editorial arm-chair.

“Break in the door, and be silent about all this; I’ll pay you well,”

she said. “Don’t you see that Monsieur Nathan is dying?”

The man got an iron bar from the press-room, with which he burst in the

door. Raoul had actually smothered himself, like any poor work-girl,

with a pan of charcoal. He had written a letter to Blondet, which lay on

the table, in which he asked him to ascribe his death to apoplexy. The

countess, however, had arrived in time; she had Raoul carried to her

coach, and then, not knowing where else to care for him, she took him to

a hotel, engaged a room, and sent for a doctor. In a few hours Raoul was

out of danger; but the countess did not leave him until she had obtained

a general confession of the causes of his act. When he had poured into

her heart the dreadful elegy of his woes, she said, in order to make him

willing to live:--

“I can arrange all that.”

But, nevertheless, she returned home with a heart oppressed with the

same anxieties and ideas that had darkened Nathan’s brow the night

before.

“Well, what was the matter with your sister?” said Felix, when his wife

returned. “You look distressed.”

“It is a dreadful history about which I am bound to secrecy,” she said,

summoning all her nerve to appear calm before him.

In order to be alone and to think at her ease, she went to the Opera

in the evening, after which she resolved to go (as we have seen) and

discharge her heart into that of her sister, Madame du Tillet; relating

to her the horrible scene of the morning, and begging her advice and

assistance. Neither the one nor the other could then know that du Tillet

himself had lighted the charcoal of the vulgar brazier, the sight of

which had so justly terrified the countess.

“He has but me in all the world,” said Marie to her sister, “and I will

not fail him.”

That speech contains the secret motive of most women; they can be heroic

when they are certain of being all in all to a grand and irreproachable

being.

A Daughter of Eve · 第 7 / 9 章