In truth was it a fearful moment--one to shake the steadiest nerves, or
thrill the stoutest heart. To me, it was an ordeal far more terrible
than that of an ordinary duel; for there was, lacking the motive--at
least on my side--which usually stimulates to an affair of honour.
Sense of wrong I felt, but too slightly for revenge--not enough to steel
the heart to the spilling of blood. Anger I _had_ felt but the moment
before; and then I could have fought, even to the death! But my blood,
that had boiled up for an instant, now ran coldly through my veins. The
unexpected behaviour of my adversary had calmed my wrath--acting upon it
like oil upon troubled water.
Thus to fight without seconds; to die without friend to speak the last
word of worldly adieu; or to take the life of another, without human
being to attest the fairness of the act--no earthly eye beholding us--no
living creature save the black vultures--appropriate instruments to give
the death-signal--ominous witnesses of the dark deed: such were the
appalling reflections that came before my mind, as I stood facing my
determined antagonist. It would scarcely be true to say, that I felt
not fear; and yet it was less cowardice, than a sort of vague vexation
at risking my life in so causeless a conflict. There was something
absolutely ludicrous in standing up to be shot at, merely to square with
the whim of this eccentric squatter; and to shoot at him seemed equally
ridiculous. Either alternative, upon reflection, appeared the very
essence of absurdity: and, having ample time to reflect, while awaiting
the signal, I could not help thinking how farcical was the whole affair.
No doubt, I might have laughed at it, had I been a mere looker on--
herald or spectator; but, unfortunately, being a principal in this
deadly duello--a real wrestler in the backwoods arena--the provocative
to mirth was given in vain; and only served to heighten the solemnity of
the situation. The circumstances might have elicited laughter; but the
contingency, turn whatever way it might, was too serious to admit of
levity on my part. Either horn of the dilemma presented a sharp point.
To suffer one's-self to be killed, in this _sans facon_, was little else
than suicide--while to kill, smacked strongly of murder! And one or the
other was the probable issue--nay, more than probable: for, as I bent my
eyes on the resolute countenance of my _vis-a-vis_, I felt certain that
there was no chance of escaping from the terrible alternative. He stood
perfectly immobile--his long rifle raised to the "ready," with its
muzzle pointing towards me--and in his eye I could not read the
slightest sign that he wavered in his determination! That grey-green
orb was the only member that moved: his body, limbs, and features were
still and rigid, as the stump behind which he stood. The eye alone
showed signs of life. I could see its glance directed towards three
points--in such rapid succession, that it might be said to look "three
ways at once"--to the decoy upon the ground, to the shadowy forms upon
the tree, and towards myself--its chief object of surveillance!
"Merciful Heavens! is there no means to avert this doom of dread? Is it
an absolute necessity, that I must either kill this colossus, or be
myself slain? Is there no alternative? Is there still no chance of an
arrangement?"
Hopeless as it appeared, I resolved to make a last effort for peace.
Once more I should try the force of an appeal. If he refused to assent
to it, my position would be no worse. Better, indeed: since I stood in
need of some stimulus to arouse me to an attitude, even of defence.
This thought swaying me, I called out:
"Holt! you are a brave man. I know it. Why should this go on? It is
not too late--"
"_You_ air a coward!" cried he, interrupting me, "an' I know it--a
sneakin' coward, in spite o' yur soger clothes! Shet up yur durned
head, or ye'll scare away the birds! an', by the tarnal! ef you do, I'll
fire at ye, the fust that takes wing!"
"Let that be the signal, then!" cried I, roused to an impatient
indignation by this new insult: "_the first that takes wing_!"
"Agreed!" was the quick rejoinder, delivered in a tone that bespoke
determination to abide by it.
My irresolution troubled me no longer. Thus driven to bay, I felt that
further forbearance would not only be idle, but dangerous. It was
playing with my life, to leave it in the hands of this unrelenting
enemy. Better make _him_ suffer for his sanguinary folly, than be
myself its victim. Stirred by these thoughts, I grasped my rifle--now
for the first time with a determination to make use of it. By the same
prompting, my eye became active--watching with resolute regard the
movements of the birds, and measuring the ground that separated me from
my adversary.
Notwithstanding the sting which his words had inflicted, I was yet
hampered by some considerations of mercy. I had no desire to _kill_ the
man, if I could avoid it. To "cripple" him would be sufficient. I had
no fear of his having the shot before me. Long practice had given me
such adroitness in the use of my weapon, that I could handle it with the
quickness and skill of a juggler. Neither did I fear to miss my aim. I
had perfect reliance on the sureness of my sight; and, with such a mark
as the huge body of the squatter, it was impossible I could miss. In
this respect, the advantage was mine; and, at so short a distance, I
could have insured a fatal shot--had such been my intention. But it was
not. The very contrary was my wish--to draw blood without inflicting a
mortal wound. This would perhaps satisfy the honour of my antagonist,
and bring our strife to an end.
Whether any such consideration was in his mind, I could not tell. It
was not visible in his eye--nor in his features that, throughout the
whole scene, preserved their stern statue-like rigidity. There was no
help for it--no alternative but to shoot at him, and shoot him down--if
possible, only to wing him; but, of course, a sense of my own danger
rendered this last of less than secondary importance. A single exchange
of shots would, no doubt decide the affair; and the advantage would fall
to him who was "quickest on the trigger." To obtain this advantage,
then, I watched with eager eye the behaviour of the birds. In like
manner was my antagonist, occupied.