THE DARKNESS BEFORE THE DAWN
The winter dragged slowly along while we led a hand-to-mouth
existence. Even those dreary times did not drive the sunshine from
my home. Love reigned supreme in the family circle and my wife
and children continually petted and caressed me, made light of our
troubles and stoutly affirmed that brighter days would surely come.
Fortunately all kept well, and while they must have felt the awful
strain of our impoverished condition, they concealed from me such
feelings, if they existed. My wife's wonderful health has, through
all our troubles been maintained. She is the only woman I ever
knew who never had a headache and in all our married life she has
never been ill.
We were to leave Sound Beach in the spring. I could not carry out
my arrangement with the owner of the property and he released me.
Where should we go next to seek an abiding place? And in my mind
was the thought, how long will we be able to remain there when we
find it.
My thoughts reverted to those days of 1876 on the little farm. "Let
us try farming again," said I, and try it we did.
At Ramsey, New Jersey, I found a modernized, comfortable house
with fifteen acres of land. There was an asparagus bed, plenty of
strawberries, and some other fruit. This place I rented for a year
at four hundred dollars and removed there on the thirtieth of April.
I employed a man with horses and plow by the day and soon had my crops
planted. About half the land was rich grass and I left this for a
hay crop. As in the old days, so now I was successful in my farming
experiment. Our crops considering the acreage, were enormous, and
again I astonished the natives. I found a ready market with the
vegetable peddlers and the profits went a long way toward paying
the rent.
At the office matters were unchanged. I was doing neither better
nor worse than for many months previous. The summer had passed and
with the early fall I foresaw a change in market conditions that
I longed to take advantage of, but I had no capital, nor could
I think of any one who would assist me--yes, I did think of one
friend who through all my trials had been stanch and true, but I
could not bring myself to the point of calling on that friend for
financial aid.
It was Mrs. Slater. Her father, Mr. Pell, had been dead for some
months and had been deprived of no comfort through his loss by my
failure.
When my payments ceased in 1897 Mrs. Slater had been compelled to
reduce her expenses and with her boy was now living in an apartment
in New York. Her income was still sufficient to enable her to
live very nicely, and though her loss had made it necessary to be
careful in her expenditures this had not in any way affected her
friendship for the man who was the cause. On the contrary, she
always stood up for me when my affairs were discussed by others
in her presence, and when occasionally I called on her she always
expressed a sympathetic friendly interest in my trials without
adding to my unhappiness by referring to my indebtedness to her.
As the days went by developments proved that my judgment of the
market was correct. An opportunity to make money was at hand and
if I was to take advantage of it I must get some capital quickly.
I felt certain with a little capital I could do a profitable
business that would not only relieve me from the terrible distress
I had been under for so long, but would enable me to commence again,
at least in part, my payments to Mrs. Slater.
After careful consideration, I put the matter before her in a letter
and then called to talk it over. She had a strong desire to help
me and of course would be glad to see her income increased, and
she very willingly let me have five thousand dollars.
Success came from the start. Of course with this small capital there
was no fortune to be made, but that was not what I was looking for
at that time. The bitter experience I had been through had put a
limit to my ambition. The acme of my desires then was a comfortable
living for my family and the ability to send to Mrs. Slater her
interest cheque promptly each month. This I was now in a fair way
to accomplish and my spirits and courage rose rapidly.
We had a very happy Christmas that year. The accounts with the
butcher and grocer had been paid up, and our gifts, consisting of
much-needed additions to the family wardrobe, gave us, I believe,
more pleasure than in the old days of prosperity when the gifts
represented large intrinsic value. Everything now was viewed in
contrast with the days of poverty which we hoped had departed never
to return.