I was too satisfied to have found my way safely in, and too glad to
feel deposited somewhere, to gaze round me just then; but a door
opened with a creaking hinge on the ground floor below, and as perfect
in my eyes as ever, stepped forth Lenhart Davy and bowed to his whole
class. He carried a little time-stick in his hands, but nothing else;
and as he placed himself in front, immediately beneath the lowest
form, I was conscious, though I believe no one else present could be,
of the powerful control he had placed as a barrier between himself and
those before him,--between his active and his passive being.
He began to address us in his fine, easy tones, in language pure
enough for the proudest intellect, sufficiently simple for the least
cultured ear; and he spoke chiefly of what he had said the time
before, recapitulating, and pausing to receive questions or to elicit
answers. But all he said, whatever it was to others, was to me a
highly spiritual analysis of what most teachers endeavor to lower and
to explain away,--the mystery and integrity of the musical art.
He touched very lightly upon theory, but expounded sounds by signs in
a manner of his own, which it is not necessary to communicate, as its
results were those of no system whatever, but was applied by wisdom,
and enforced by gradual acquaintance.
We did not begin to sing for at least half an hour; but he then
unlocked a huge closet, drew forth an enormous board, and mapped
thereon in white chalk the exercises of his own preparation for our
evening's practice. These were pure, were simple, as his introductory
address.
As I have said, the class was only just organized, but it was not a
very small one; there must have been sixty or seventy present that
night. I was in the topmost row of altos, and as soon as we began to
sing I was irresistibly attracted to those about me; and to identify
them with their voices was for me a singular fascination. I was but
the fourth from the wall on my side, and a burner was directly above
me. I took advantage of the light to criticise the countenances of my
nearer contemporaries, who were all absorbed in watching our master's
evolutions. I could not look at him until I had acquainted myself with
my locality, as far as I could without staring, or being stared at.
Next the wall, two boys (so alike that they could only have been
brothers) nestled and bawled; they were dark-hued, yet sallow, and not
inviting. I concluded they came from some factory, and so they did;
but they did not please me enough to detain my attention,--they were
beneath my own grade. So was a little girl nearest to them and next to
me, but I could not help regarding her. She had the most imperturbable
gaze I ever met,--great eyes of a yellow hazel, with no more
expression in them than water; but her cheeks were brightly colored,
and her long auburn hair was curled to her waist.
An ease pervaded her that was more than elegance. She leaned and she
lounged, singing in a flexible voice, without the slightest effort,
and as carelessly as she looked. She wore a pink gingham frock, ill
made to a degree, but her slender figure moved in and out of it like a
reed; her hands were fitted into discolored light kid gloves, and she
had on an amber necklace. This alone would have disgusted me, if she
had not looked so unconcerned, so strange, and if I had not thought
her hair so very pretty; but I did, and, as I have said, I could not
avoid regarding her. She had her bonnet in her lap (a bruised muslin
one, with tumbled satin strings); and I was surveying it rather
closely, when she turned upon me and whispered loud, not low (and then
went on singing herself, instantly), "Why don't you sing?" Scared and
shocked, I drew myself away from her as far as possible, and moved my
eyes to my other neighbor. It was a girl too; but I instantly felt the
words "young lady" to be appropriate, though I knew not wherefore,
except that she was, as it were, so perfectly self-possessed. She must
be older than I am (it occurred to me), but I could not tell how much.
She was, in fact, about fourteen.
It was some relief to look upon her, after being attacked by the quick
little being on my right hand, because she seemed as utterly
indisposed to address me as the other had been determined. She did not
seem even to see me, nor give the least glance at anybody or anything,
except Lenhart Davy and his board. Upon them she fastened her whole
expression, and she sang with assiduous calmness. So, though I sang
too, fearing my friend would observe my silence, I turned quite
towards my young lady and watched her intensely,--she noticing me no
more than she would have noticed a fly walking upon the wall, or upon
Lenhart Davy's board. I was very fastidious then, whatever I may be
now, and I seldom gazed upon a face for the pleasure of seeing it. In
this instance I experienced a feeling beyond pleasure, so exquisitely
did the countenance beside me harmonize with something in myself. Not
strictly fine, nor severely perfect in outline or of hue, this sweet
face shone in glory not its own,--the most ardent musical intention
lay upon the eyes, the lips, the brow; and the deep lashes themselves
seemed born to shade from too much brightness a beholder like myself.
I thought her a young woman, and so she was, compared with my age, at
least; but my awe and her exaltation were measured by a distant
self-possession towards me, towards all. She was not dressed with much
more costliness than my wild little rebuker; but her plain black frock
fitted her beautifully, and her dark gloves, and the dark ribbon on
her hat, and her little round muff, satisfied me as to her gentle and
her womanly pretensions.
In linking these adjectives, you will realize one of my infatuations
wherever they are substantively found. Enough. I dared not leave off
singing, and my voice was rather strong, so I could not clearly decide
upon hers, until Davy wrote up a few intervals for unisons, which very
few of us achieved on the instant. My calm companion was among those
who did. Her voice was more touching than any I had ever heard, and a
true contralto; only more soft than deep, more distilling than low.
But unknowing as I was, I was certain she had sung, and had learned to
sing, long before she had joined the class; for in her singing there
was that purified quality which reminds one (it did me) of filtered
water, and she pronounced most skilfully the varied vocables. I felt
afterwards that she must have been annoyed at my pertinacious
scrutiny, but she betrayed not the remotest cognizance of me or my
regards; and this indifference compelled me to watch her far more than
sympathetic behavior would have done. That evening seemed long to me
while we were at work, but I could not bear the breaking-up. I had
become, as it were, connected with my companions, though we had not
exchanged a word. I was rather disposed to wait and see who would join
my little girl with her wild eyes, and my serene young lady. I believe
I should have done so, but Lenhart Davy kindly came up from below and
shook hands with me; and while I was receiving and returning his
greeting, they were lost in the general crowd.
He took me himself down stairs to Margareth, who was awaiting me with
a cloak and a comforter in a little unfurnished room; and then he
himself departed, looking very tired.