CHAPTER 15

EVA EVERSLEIGH

_(James Orlebar Cloyster’s narrative continued)_

With my system thus in full swing I experienced the intoxication of

assured freedom. To say I was elated does not describe it. I walked on

air. This was my state of mind when I determined to pay a visit to the

Gunton-Cresswells. I had known them in my college days, but since I had

been engaged in literature I had sedulously avoided them because I

remembered that Margaret had once told me they were her friends.

But now there was no need for me to fear them on that account, and

thinking that the solid comfort of their house in Kensington would be

far from disagreeable, thither, one afternoon in spring, I made my way.

It is wonderful how friendly Convention is to Art when Art does not

appear to want to borrow money.

No. 5, Kensington Lane, W., is the stronghold of British

respectability. It is more respectable than the most respectable

suburb. Its attitude to Mayfair is that of a mother to a daughter who

has gone on the stage and made a success. Kensington Lane is almost

tolerant of Mayfair. But not quite. It admits the success, but shakes

its head.

Mrs. Gunton-Cresswell took an early opportunity of drawing me aside,

and began gently to pump me. After I had responded with sufficient

docility to her leads, she reiterated her delight at seeing me again. I

had concluded my replies with the words, “I am a struggling journalist,

Mrs. Cresswell.” I accompanied the phrase with a half-smile which she

took to mean—as I intended she should—that I was amusing myself by

dabbling in literature, backed by a small, but adequate, private

income.

“Oh, come, James,” she said, smiling approvingly, “you know you will

make a quite too dreadfully clever success. How dare you try to deceive

me like that? A struggling journalist, indeed.”

But I knew she liked that “struggling journalist” immensely. She would

couple me and my own epithet together before her friends. She would

enjoy unconsciously an imperceptible, but exquisite, sensation of

patronage by having me at her house. Even if she discussed me with

Margaret I was safe. For Margaret would give an altogether different

interpretation of the smile with which I described myself as

struggling. My smile would be mentally catalogued by her as “brave”;

for it must not be forgotten that as suddenly as my name had achieved a

little publicity, just so suddenly had it utterly disappeared.

Towards the end of May, it happened that Julian dropped into my rooms

about three o’clock, and found me gazing critically at a top-hat.

“I’ve seen you,” he remarked, “rather often in that get-up lately.”

“It _is_, perhaps, losing its first gloss,” I answered, inspecting my

hat closely. I cared not a bit for Julian’s sneers; for the smell of

the flesh-pots of Kensington had laid hold of my soul, and I was

resolved to make the most of the respite which my system gave me.

“What salon is to have the honour today?” he asked, spreading himself

on my sofa.

“I’m going to the Gunton-Cresswells,” I replied.

Julian slowly sat up.

“Ah?” he said conversationally.

“I’ve been asked to meet their niece, a Miss Eversleigh, whom they’ve

invited to stop with them. Funny, by the way, that her name should be

the same as yours.”

“Not particularly,” said Julian shortly; “she’s my cousin. My cousin

Eva.”

This was startling. There was a pause. Presently Julian said, “Do you

know, Jimmy, that if I were not the philosopher I am, I’d curse this

awful indolence of mine.”

I saw it in a flash, and went up to him holding out my hand in

sympathy. “Thanks,” he said, gripping it; “but don’t speak of it. I

couldn’t endure that, even from you, James. It’s too hard for talking.

If it was only myself whose life I’d spoilt—if it was only myself——”

He broke off. And then, “Hers too. She’s true as steel.”

I had heard no more bitter cry than that.

I began to busy myself amongst some manuscripts to give Julian time to

compose himself. And so an hour passed. At a quarter past four I got up

to go out. Julian lay recumbent. It seemed terrible to leave him

brooding alone over his misery.

A closer inspection, however, showed me he was asleep.

Meanwhile, Eva Eversleigh and I became firm friends. Of her person I

need simply say that it was the most beautiful that Nature ever

created. Pressed as to details, I should add that she was _petite_,

dark, had brown hair, very big blue eyes, a _retroussé_ nose, and a

rather wide mouth.

Julian had said she was “true as steel.” Therefore, I felt no

diffidence in manoeuvring myself into her society on every conceivable

occasion. Sometimes she spoke to me of Julian, whom I admitted I knew,

and, with feminine courage, she hid her hopeless, all-devouring

affection for her cousin under the cloak of ingenuous levity. She

laughed nearly every time his name was mentioned.

About this time the Gunton-Cresswells gave a dance.

I looked forward to it with almost painful pleasure. I had not been to

a dance since my last May-week at Cambridge. Also No. 5, Kensington

Lane had completely usurped the position I had previously assigned to

Paradise. To waltz with Julian’s cousin—that was the ambition which now

dwarfed my former hankering for the fame of authorship or a habitation

in Bohemia.

Mrs. Goodwin once said that happiness consists in anticipating an

impossible future. Be that as it may, I certainly thought my sensations

were pleasant enough when at length my hansom pulled up jerkily beside

the red-carpeted steps of No. 5, Kensington Lane. As I paid the fare, I

could hear the murmur from within of a waltz tune—and I kept repeating

to myself that Eva had promised me the privilege of taking her in to

supper, and had given me the last two waltzes and the first two extras.

I went to pay my _devoirs_ to my hostess. She was supinely gamesome.

“Ah,” she said, showing her excellent teeth, “Genius attendant at the

revels of Terpsichore.”

“Where Beauty, Mrs. Gunton-Cresswell,” I responded, cutting it, as

though mutton, thick, “teaches e’en the humblest visitor the reigning

Muse’s art.”

“You may have this one, if you like,” said Mrs. Gunton-Cresswell

simply.

Supper came at last, and, with supper, Eva.

I must now write it down that she was not a type of English beauty. She

was not, I mean, queenly, impassive,

never-anything-but-her-cool-calm-self. Tonight, for instance, her eyes

were as I had never seen them. There danced in them the merriest

glitter, which was more than a mere glorification of the ordinary merry

glitter—which scores of girls possess at every ball. To begin with,

there was a diabolical abandon in Eva’s glitter, which raised it

instantly above the common herd’s. And behind it all was that very

misty mist. I don’t know whether all men have seen that mist; but I am

sure that no man has seen it more than once; and, from what I’ve seen

of the average man, I doubt if most of them have ever seen it at all.

Well, there it was for me to see in Eva Eversleigh’s eyes that night at

supper. It made me think of things unspeakable. I felt a rush of

classic aestheticism: Arcadia, Helen of Troy, the happy valleys of the

early Greeks. Supper: I believe I gave her oyster _pâtés_. But I was

far away. Deep, deep, deep in Eva’s eyes I saw a craft sighting, ’neath

a cloudless azure sky, the dark blue Symplegades; heard in my ears the

jargon, loud and near me, of the sailors; and faintly o’er the distance

of the dead-calm sea rose intermittently the sound of brine-foam at the

clashing rocks....

As we sat there _tête-à-tête_, she smiled across the table at me with

such perfect friendliness, it seemed as though a magic barrier

separated our two selves from all the chattering, rustling crowd around

us. When she spoke, a little quiver of feeling blended adorably with

the low, sweet tones of her voice. We talked, indeed, of trifles, but

with just that charming hint of intimacy which men friends have who may

have known one another from birth, and may know one another for a

lifetime, but never become bores, never change. Only when it comes

between a woman and a man, it is incomparably finer. It is the talk, of

course, of lovers who have not realised they are in love.

“The two last waltzes,” I murmured, when parting with her. She nodded.

I roamed the Gunton-Cresswells’s rooms awaiting them.

She danced those two last waltzes with strangers.

The thing was utterly beyond me at the time. Looking back, I am still

amazed to what lengths deliberate coquetry can go.

She actually took pains to elude me, and gave those waltzes to

strangers.

From being comfortably rocked in the dark blue waters of a Grecian sea,

I was suddenly transported to the realities of the ballroom. My

theoretical love for Eva was now a substantial truth. I was in an agony

of desire, in a frenzy of jealousy. I wanted to hurl the two strangers

to opposite corners of the ballroom, but civilisation forbade it.

I was now in an altogether indescribable state of nerves and suspense.

Had she definitely and for some unfathomable reason decided to cut me?

The first extra drew languorously to a close, couples swept from the

room to the grounds, the gallery or the conservatory. I tried to steady

my whirling head with a cigarette and a whisky-and-soda in the

smoking-room.

The orchestra, like a train starting tentatively on a long run,

launched itself mildly into the preliminary bars of _Tout Passe_. I

sought the ballroom blinded by my feelings. Pulling myself together

with an effort, I saw her standing alone. It struck me for the first

time that she was clothed in cream. Her skin gleamed shining white. She

stood erect, her arms by her sides. Behind her was a huge, black velvet

_portière_ of many folds, supported by two dull brazen columns.

As I advanced towards her, two or three men bowed and spoke to her. She

smiled and dismissed them, and, still smiling pleasantly, her glance

traversed the crowd and rested upon me. I was drawing now quite near.

Her eyes met mine; nor did she avert them, and stooping a little to

address her, I heard her sigh.

“You’re tired,” I said, forgetting my two last dances, forgetting

everything but that I loved her.

“Perhaps I am,” she said, taking my arm. We turned in silence to the

_portière_ and found ourselves in the hall. The doors were opened. Some

servants were there. At the bottom of the steps I chanced to see a

yellow light.

“Find out if that cab’s engaged,” I said to a footman.

“The cool air——” I said to Eva.

“The cab is not engaged, sir,” said the footman, returning.

“Yes,” said Eva, in answer to my glance.

“Drive to the corner of Sloane Street, by way of the Park,” I told the

driver.

I have said that I had forgotten everything except that I loved her.

Could it help remembrance now that we two sped alone through empty

streets, her warm, palpitating body touching mine?

Julian, his friendship for me, his love for Eva; Margaret and her love

for me; my own honour—these things were blotted from my brain.

“Eva!” I murmured; and I took her hand.

“Eva.”

Her wonderful eyes met mine. The mist in them seemed to turn to dew.

“My darling,” she whispered, very low. And, the road being deserted, I

drew her face to mine and kissed her.

Not George Washington — an Autobiographical Novel · 第 15 / 26 章