Mrs. Perkins. Yes.
[She rushes from the room.
Mrs. Bradley. What for?
Yardsley. I'll lasso him, next time he comes around.
Perkins (with a grin). There'll be two of us! We can start a
hospital on the top floor.
Mrs. Perkins (returning). Here--here's the line.
[Yardsley takes it hurriedly, and, tying it into a noose, hastens
out.
Perkins (rising). If I never walk again, I must see this. [Limps to
window.
Mrs. Bradley. He's coming, Mr. Yardsley; don't miss him.
Barlow. Steady, Bob; get in the light.
Mrs. Perkins. Suppose it catches his neck?
Perkins. This beats the Wild West Show.
[A crash.
All. He's got him.
[All rush out, except Perkins.
Perkins. Oh yes; he learned in a minute, he did. Easy! Ha, ha!
Gad! it almost makes me forget my pain.
Enter all, asking. "Is he hurt? How do you feel?" etc. Yardsley
has rope-end in right hand; noose is tied about Bradley's body, his
coat and clothing are much the worse for wear.
Mrs. Bradley. Poor, dear Edward!
Bradley (weakly kissing her). Don't m-mind me. I--I'm all right--
only a little exhilarated--and somewhat--er--somewhat breathless.
Feel like a bird--on toast. Yardsley, you're a brick. But that
pavement--that was a pile of 'em, and the hardest I ever encountered.
I always thought asphalt was soft--who said asphalt was soft?
Perkins. Easy to learn, though, eh?
Bradley. Too easy. I'd have gone on--er--forever--er--if it hadn't
been for Bob.
Mrs. Bradley. I'll give it up, Ned dear, if you say so.
Mrs. Perkins (affectionately). That's sweet of you, Emma.
Bradley. No, indeed, you won't, for--er--I--I rather like it while
it's going on, and when I learn to get off--
Yardsley. Which you will very shortly.
Barlow. You bet! he's a dandy. I taught him.
Bradley. I think I'll adore it.
Perkins. Buy a Czar wheel, Brad. Best in the market; weighs only
twenty pounds. I've got one with a ki-yi pump and a pneumatic gun
you can have for ten dollars.
Jennie (at the door). Supper is served ma'am. [Exit.
Mrs. Perkins. Let us go out and restore our nerves. Come, Emma.
[She and Mrs. Bradley walk out.
Yardsley (aside). I say, Brad, you owe me five.
Bradley. What for?
Yardsley. Bail.
Barlow. Cheap too.
Yardsley. Very. I think he ought to open a bottle besides.
Perkins. I'll attend to the bottles. We'll have three.
Barlow. Two will be enough.
Perkins. Three--two of fizz for you and Bob and the ladies, and if
Bradley will agree, I'll split a quart of Pond's Extract with him.
Bradley. I'll go you. I think I could take care of the whole quart
myself.
Perkins. Then we'll make it four bottles.
Mrs. Perkins (appearing at door with her arm about Mrs. Bradley).
Aren't you coming?
Perkins (rising with difficulty). As fast as we can, my dear. We've
been taking lessons, you know, and can't move as rapidly as the rest
of you. We're a trifle--ah--a trifle tired. Yardsley, you tow
Bradley into the dining room; and, Barlow, kindly pretend I'm a
shawl, will you, and carry me in.
Bradley. I'll buy a wheel to-morrow.
Perkins. Don't, Brad. I--I'll give you mine. Fact is, old man, I
don't exactly like feeling like a bird.
[They go out, and as the last, Perkins and Bradley, disappear stiffly
through the portieres, the curtain falls.