FAREWELL TO DOODLES.
At last came the day on which the two Claverings were to go down
to Harwich and put themselves on board Jack Stuart's yacht. The
hall of the house in Berkeley Square was strewed with portmanteaus,
gun-cases, and fishing-rods, whereas the wine and packets of
preserved meat, and the bottled beer and fish in tins, and the large
box of cigars, and the prepared soups, had been sent down by Boxall,
and were by this time on board the boat. Hugh and Archie were to
leave London this day by train at 5 P.M., and were to sleep on board.
Jack Stuart was already there, having assisted in working the yacht
round from Brightlingsea.
On that morning Archie had a farewell breakfast at his club with
Doodles, and after that, having spent the intervening hours in the
billiard-room, a farewell luncheon. There had been something of
melancholy in this last day between the friends, originating partly
in the failure of Archie's hopes as to Lady Ongar, and partly perhaps
in the bad character which seemed to belong to Jack Stuart and his
craft. "He has been at it for years, and always coming to grief,"
said Doodles. "He is just like a man I know, who has been hunting
for the last ten years, and can't sit a horse at a fence yet. He has
broken every bone in his skin, and I don't suppose he ever saw a good
thing to a finish. He never knows whether hounds are in cover, or
where they are. His only idea is to follow another man's red coat
till he comes to grief;--and yet he will go on hunting. There are
some people who never will understand what they can do, and what
they can't." In answer to this, Archie reminded his friend that on
this occasion Jack Stuart would have the advantage of an excellent
dry-nurse, acknowledged to be very great on such occasions. Would
not he, Archie Clavering, be there to pilot Jack Stuart and his
boat? But, nevertheless, Doodles was melancholy, and went on telling
stories about that unfortunate man who would continue to break his
bones, though he had no aptitude for out-of-door sports. "He'll be
carried home on a stretcher some day, you know," said Doodles.
"What does it matter if he is?" said Archie, boldly, thinking of
himself and of the danger predicted for him. "A man can only die
once."
"I call it quite a tempting of Providence," said Doodles.
But their conversation was chiefly about Lady Ongar and the Spy. It
was only on this day that Doodles had learned that Archie had in
truth offered his hand, and been rejected; and Captain Clavering was
surprised by the extent of his friend's sympathy. "It's a doosed
disagreeable thing,--a very disagreeable thing indeed," said Doodles.
Archie, who did not wish to be regarded as specially unfortunate,
declined to look at the matter in this light; but Doodles insisted.
"It would cut me up like the very mischief," he said. "I know that;
and the worst of it is, that perhaps you wouldn't have gone on, only
for me. I meant it all for the best, old fellow. I did, indeed.
There; that's the game to you. I'm playing uncommon badly this
morning; but the truth is, I'm thinking of those women." Now as
Doodles was playing for a little money, this was really civil on his
part.
And he would persevere in talking about the Spy, as though there
were something in his remembrance of the lady which attracted him
irresistibly to the subject. He had always boasted that in his
interview with her he had come off with the victory, nor did he now
cease to make such boasts; but still he spoke of her and her powers
with an awe which would have completely opened the eyes of any one a
little more sharp on such matters than Archie Clavering. He was so
intent on this subject that he sent the marker out of the room so
that he might discuss it with more freedom, and might plainly express
his views as to her influence on his friend's fate.
"By George! she's a wonderful woman. Do you know I can't help
thinking of her at night. She keeps me awake;--she does, upon my
honour."
"I can't say she keeps me awake, but I wish I had my seventy pounds
back again."
"Do you know, if I were you, I shouldn't grudge it. I should think it
worth pretty nearly all the money to have had the dealing with her."
"Then you ought to go halves."
"Well, yes;--only that I ain't flush, I would. When one thinks of it,
her absolutely taking the notes out of your waistcoat-pocket, upon my
word it's beautiful! She'd have had it out of mine, if I hadn't been
doosed sharp."
"She understood what she was about, certainly."
"What I should like to know is this: did she or did she not tell Lady
Ongar what she was to do;--about you I mean? I daresay she did after
all."
"And took my money for nothing?"
"Because you didn't go high enough, you know."
"But that was your fault. I went as high as you told me."
"No, you didn't, Clavvy; not if you remember. But the fact is, I
don't suppose you could go high enough. I shouldn't be surprised if
such a woman as that wanted--thousands! I shouldn't indeed. I shall
never forget the way in which she swore at me;--and how she abused me
about my family. I think she must have had some special reason for
disliking Warwickshire, she said such awful hard things about it."
"How did she know that you came from Warwickshire?"
"She did know it. If I tell you something don't you say anything
about it. I have an idea about her."
"What is it?"
"I didn't mention it before, because I don't talk much of those sort
of things. I don't pretend to understand them, and it is better to
leave them alone."
"But what do you mean?"
Doodles looked very solemn as he answered. "I think she's a
medium--or a media, or whatever it ought to be called."
"What! one of those spirit-rapping people?" And Archie's hair almost
stood on end as he asked the question.
"They don't rap now,--not the best of them, that is. That was the old
way, and seems to have been given up."
"But what do you suppose she did?"
"How did she know that the money was in your waistcoat-pocket, now?
How did she know that I came from Warwickshire? And then she had a
way of going about the room as though she could have raised herself
off her feet in a moment if she had chosen. And then her swearing,
and the rest of it,--so unlike any other woman, you know."
"But do you think she could have made Julia hate me?"
"Ah, I can't tell that. There are such lots of things going on
now-a-days that a fellow can understand nothing about! But I've no
doubt of this,--if you were to tie her up with ropes ever so, I don't
in the least doubt but what she'd get out."
Archie was awe-struck, and made two or three strokes after this; but
then he plucked up his courage and asked a question,--
"Where do you suppose they get it from, Doodles?"
"That's just the question."
"Is it from--the devil, do you think?" said Archie, whispering the
name of the Evil One in a very low voice.
"Well, yes; I suppose that's most likely."
"Because they don't seem to do a great deal of harm with it after
all. As for my money, she would have had that any way, for I intended
to give it to her."
"There are people who think," said Doodles, "that the spirits don't
come from anywhere, but are always floating about."
"And then one person catches them, and another doesn't?" asked
Archie.
"They tell me that it depends upon what the mediums or medias eat and
drink," said Doodles, "and upon what sort of minds they have. They
must be cleverish people, I fancy, or the spirits wouldn't come to
them."
"But you never hear of any swell being a medium. Why don't the
spirits go to a prime minister or some of those fellows? Only think
what a help they'd be."
"If they come from the devil," suggested Doodles, "he wouldn't let
them do any real good."
"I've heard a deal about them," said Archie, "and it seems to me that
the mediums are always poor people, and that they come from nobody
knows where. The Spy is a clever woman I daresay--"
"There isn't much doubt about that," said the admiring Doodles.
"But you can't say she's respectable, you know. If I was a spirit I
wouldn't go to a woman who wore such dirty stockings as she had on."
"That's nonsense, Clavvy. What does a spirit care about a woman's
stockings?"
"But why don't they ever go to the wise people? that's what I want
to know." And as he asked the question boldly he struck his ball
sharply, and, lo, the three balls rolled vanquished into three
different pockets. "I don't believe about it," said Archie, as he
readjusted the score. "The devil can't do such things as that or
there'd be an end of everything; and as to spirits in the air, why
should there be more spirits now than there were four-and-twenty
years ago?"
"That's all very well, old fellow," said Doodles, "but you and I
ain't clever enough to understand everything." Then that subject was
dropped, and Doodles went back for a while to the perils of Jack
Stuart's yacht.
After the lunch, which was in fact Archie's early dinner, Doodles
was going to leave his friend, but Archie insisted that his brother
captain should walk with him up to Berkeley Square, and see the last
of him into his cab. Doodles had suggested that Sir Hugh would be
there, and that Sir Hugh was not always disposed to welcome his
brother's friends to his own house after the most comfortable modes
of friendship; but Archie explained that on such an occasion as this
there need be no fear on that head; he and his brother were going
away together, and there was a certain feeling of jollity about the
trip which would divest Sir Hugh of his roughness. "And besides,"
said Archie, "as you will be there to see me off, he'll know that
you're not going to stay yourself." Convinced by this, Doodles
consented to walk up to Berkeley Square.
Sir Hugh had spent the greatest part of this day at home, immersed
among his guns and rods, and their various appurtenances. He also had
breakfasted at his club, but had ordered his luncheon to be prepared
for him at home. He had arranged to leave Berkeley Square at four,
and had directed that his lamb chops should be brought to him exactly
at three. He was himself a little late in coming downstairs, and it
was ten minutes past the hour when he desired that the chops might be
put on the table, saying that he himself would be in the drawing-room
in time to meet them. He was a man solicitous about his lamb chops,
and careful that the asparagus should be hot; solicitous also as
to that bottle of Lafitte by which those comestibles were to be
accompanied and which was, of its own nature, too good to be shared
with his brother Archie. But as he was on the landing, by the
drawing-room door, descending quickly, conscious that in obedience to
his orders the chops had been already served, he was met by a servant
who, with disturbed face and quick voice, told him that there was a
lady waiting for him in the hall.
"D---- it!" said Sir Hugh.
"She has just come, Sir Hugh, and says that she specially wants to
see you."
"Why the devil did you let her in?"
"She walked in when the door was opened, Sir Hugh, and I couldn't
help it. She seemed to be a lady, Sir Hugh, and I didn't like not to
let her inside the door."
"What's the lady's name?" asked the master.
"It's a foreign name, Sir Hugh. She said she wouldn't keep you five
minutes." The lamb chops, and the asparagus, and the Lafitte were in
the dining-room, and the only way to the dining-room lay through the
hall to which the foreign lady had obtained an entrance. Sir Hugh,
making such calculations as the moments allowed, determined that he
would face the enemy, and pass on to his banquet over her prostrate
body. He went quickly down into the hall, and there was encountered
by Sophie Gordeloup, who, skipping over the gun-cases, and rushing
through the portmanteaus, caught the baronet by the arm before he had
been able to approach the dining-room door. "Sir 'Oo," she said, "I
am so glad to have caught you. You are going away, and I have things
to tell you which you must hear--yes; it is well for you I have
caught you, Sir 'Oo." Sir Hugh looked as though he by no means
participated in this feeling, and saying something about his great
hurry begged that he might be allowed to go to his food. Then he
added that, as far as his memory served him, he had not the honour of
knowing the lady who was addressing him.
"You come in to your little dinner," said Sophie, "and I will tell
you everything as you are eating. Don't mind me. You shall eat and
drink, and I will talk. I am Madame Gordeloup,--Sophie Gordeloup.
Ah,--you know the name now. Yes. That is me. Count Pateroff is my
brother. You know Count Pateroff? He knowed Lord Ongar, and I knowed
Lord Ongar. We know Lady Ongar. Ah,--you understand now that I can
have much to tell. It is well you was not gone without seeing me? Eh;
yes! You shall eat and drink, but suppose you send that man into the
kitchen!"
Sir Hugh was so taken by surprise that he hardly knew how to act on
the spur of the moment. He certainly had heard of Madame Gordeloup,
though he had never before seen her. For years past her name had been
familiar to him in London, and when Lady Ongar had returned as a
widow it had been, to his thinking, one of her worst offences that
this woman had been her friend. Under ordinary circumstances his
judgment would have directed him to desire the servant to put her out
into the street as an impostor, and to send for the police if there
was any difficulty. But it certainly might be possible that this
woman had something to tell with reference to Lady Ongar which it
would suit his purposes to hear. At the present moment he was not
very well inclined to his sister-in-law, and was disposed to hear
evil of her. So he passed on into the dining-room and desired Madame
Gordeloup to follow him. Then he closed the room door, and standing
up with his back to the fireplace, so that he might be saved from the
necessity of asking her to sit down, he declared himself ready to
hear anything that his visitor might have to say.
"But you will eat your dinner, Sir 'Oo? You will not mind me. I shall
not care."
"Thank you, no;--if you will just say what you have got to say, I
will be obliged to you."
"But the nice things will be so cold! Why should you mind me? Nobody
minds me."
"I will wait, if you please, till you have done me the honour of
leaving me."
"Ah, well,--you Englishmen are so cold and ceremonious. But Lord
Ongar was not with me like that. I knew Lord Ongar so well."
"Lord Ongar was more fortunate than I am."
"He was a poor man who did kill himself. Yes. It was always that
bottle of Cognac. And there was other bottles was worser still. Never
mind; he has gone now, and his widow has got the money. It is she
has been a fortunate woman! Sir 'Oo, I will sit down here in the
arm-chair." Sir Hugh made a motion with his hand, not daring to
forbid her to do as she was minded. "And you, Sir 'Oo;--will not you
sit down also?"
"I will continue to stand if you will allow me."
"Very well; you shall do as most pleases you. As I did walk here, and
shall walk back, I will sit down."
"And now if you have anything to say, Madame Gordeloup," said Sir
Hugh, looking at the silver covers which were hiding the chops and
the asparagus, and looking also at his watch, "perhaps you will be
good enough to say it."
"Anything to say! Yes, Sir 'Oo, I have something to say. It is a pity
you will not sit at your dinner."
"I will not sit at my dinner till you have left me. So now, if you
will be pleased to proceed--"
"I will proceed. Perhaps you don't know that Lord Ongar died in these
arms?" And Sophie, as she spoke, stretched out her skinny hands, and
put herself as far as possible into the attitude in which it would be
most convenient to nurse the head of a dying man upon her bosom. Sir
Hugh, thinking to himself that Lord Ongar could hardly have received
much consolation in his fate from this incident, declared that he had
not heard the fact before. "No; you have not heard it. She have tell
nothing to her friends here. He die abroad, and she has come back
with all the money; but she tell nothing to anybody here, so I must
tell."
"But I don't care how he died, Madame Gordeloup. It is nothing to
me."
"But yes, Sir 'Oo. The lady, your wife, is the sister to Lady Ongar.
Is not that so? Lady Ongar did live with you before she was married.
Is not that so? Your brother and your cousin both wishes to marry her
and have all the money. Is not that so? Your brother has come to me
to help him, and has sent the little man out of Warwickshire. Is not
that so?"
"What the d---- is all that to me?" said Sir Hugh, who did not quite
understand the story as the lady was telling it.
"I will explain, Sir 'Oo, what the d---- it is to you; only I wish
you were eating the nice things on the table. This Lady Ongar is
treating me very bad. She treat my brother very bad too. My brother
is Count Pateroff. We have been put to--oh, such expenses for her!
It have nearly ruined me. I make a journey to your London here
altogether for her. Then, for her, I go down to that accursed little
island;--what you call it?--where she insult me. Oh! all my time
is gone. Your brother and your cousin, and the little man out of
Warwickshire, all coming to my house,--just as it please them."
"But what is this to me?" shouted Sir Hugh.
"A great deal to you," screamed back Madame Gordeloup. "You see I
know everything,--everything. I have got papers."
"What do I care for your papers? Look here, Madame Gordeloup, you had
better go away."
"Not yet, Sir 'Oo; not yet. You are going away to Norway--I know; and
I am ruined before you come back."
"Look here, madame; do you mean that you want money from me?"
"I want my rights, Sir 'Oo. Remember, I know everything;--everything;
oh, such things! If they were all known,--in the newspapers, you
understand, or that kind of thing, that lady in Bolton Street would
lose all her money to-morrow. Yes. There is uncles to the little
lord; yes! Ah, how much would they give me, I wonder? They would not
tell me to go away."
Sophie was perhaps justified in the estimate she had made of Sir
Hugh's probable character from the knowledge which she had acquired
of his brother Archie; but, nevertheless, she had fallen into a great
mistake. There could hardly have been a man then in London less
likely to fall into her present views than Sir Hugh Clavering. Not
only was he too fond of his money to give it away without knowing why
he did so; but he was subject to none of that weakness by which some
men are prompted to submit to such extortions. Had he believed her
story, and had Lady Ongar been really dear to him, he would never
have dealt with such a one as Madame Gordeloup otherwise than through
the police.
"Madame Gordeloup," said he, "if you don't immediately take yourself
off, I shall have you put out of the house."
He would have sent for a constable at once, had he not feared that by
doing so, he would retard his journey.
"What!" said Sophie, whose courage was as good as his own. "Me put
out of the house! Who shall touch me?"
"My servant shall; or if that will not do, the police. Come, walk."
And he stepped over towards her as though he himself intended to
assist in her expulsion by violence.
"Well, you are there; I see you; and what next?" said Sophie. "You,
and your valk! I can tell you things fit for you to know, and you
say, Valk. If I valk, I will valk to some purpose. I do not often
valk for nothing when I am told--Valk!" Upon this, Sir Hugh rang the
bell with some violence. "I care nothing for your bells, or for your
servants, or for your policemen. I have told you that your sister owe
me a great deal of money, and you say,--Valk. I vill valk." Thereupon
the servant came into the room, and Sir Hugh, in an angry voice,
desired him to open the front door. "Yes,--open vide," said Sophie,
who, when anger came upon her, was apt to drop into a mode of
speaking English which she was able to avoid in her cooler moments.
"Sir 'Oo, I am going to valk, and you shall hear of my valking."
"Am I to take that as a threat?" said he.
"Not a tret at all," said she; "only a promise. Ah, I am good to keep
my promises! Yes, I make a promise. Your poor wife,--down with the
daises; I know all, and she shall hear too. That is another promise.
And your brother, the captain. Oh! here he is, and the little man
out of Warwickshire." She had got up from her chair, and had moved
towards the door with the intention of going; but just as she was
passing out into the hall, she encountered Archie and Doodles. Sir
Hugh, who had been altogether at a loss to understand what she had
meant by the man out of Warwickshire, followed her into the hall, and
became more angry than before at finding that his brother had brought
a friend to his house at so very inopportune a moment. The wrath in
his face was so plainly expressed that Doodles could perceive it, and
wished himself away. The presence also of the Spy was not pleasant
to the gallant captain. Was the wonderful woman ubiquitous, that
he should thus encounter her again, and that so soon after all the
things that he had spoken of her on this morning? "How do you do,
gentlemen?" said Sophie. "There is a great many boxes here, and I
with my crinoline have not got room." Then she shook hands, first
with Archie, and then with Doodles; and asked the latter why he
was not as yet gone to Warwickshire. Archie, in almost mortal fear,
looked up into his brother's face. Had his brother learned the story
of that seventy pounds? Sir Hugh was puzzled beyond measure at
finding that the woman knew the two men; but having still an eye to
his lamb chops, was chiefly anxious to get rid of Sophie and Doodles
together.
"This is my friend Boodle,--Captain Boodle," said Archie, trying to
put a bold face upon the crisis. "He has come to see me off."
"Very kind of him," said Sir Hugh. "Just make way for this lady, will
you? I want to get her out of the house if I can. Your friend seems
to know her; perhaps he'll be good enough to give her his arm."
"Who;--I?" said Doodles. "No; I don't know her particularly. I did
meet her once before, just once,--in a casual way."
"Captain Booddle and me is very good friends," said Sophie. "He come
to my house and behave himself very well; only he is not so handy a
man as your brother, Sir 'Oo."
Archie trembled, and he trembled still more when his brother, turning
to him, asked him if he knew the woman.
"Yes; he know the woman very well," said Sophie. "Why do you not
come any more to see me? You send your little friend; but I like you
better yourself. You come again when you return, and all that shall
be made right."
But still she did not go. She had now seated herself on a gun-case
which was resting on a portmanteau, and seemed to be at her ease. The
time was going fast, and Sir Hugh, if he meant to eat his chops, must
eat them at once.
"See her out of the hall, into the street," he said to Archie; "and
if she gives trouble, send for the police. She has come here to get
money from me by threats, and only that we have no time, I would have
her taken to the lock-up house at once." Then Sir Hugh retreated into
the dining-room and shut the door.
"Lock-up-ouse!" said Sophie, scornfully. "What is dat?"
"He means a prison," said Doodles.
"Prison! I know who is most likely be in a prison. Tell me of a
prison! Is he a minister of state that he can send out order for me
to be made prisoner? Is there lettres de cachet now in England? I
think not. Prison, indeed!"
"But really, Madame Gordeloup, you had better go; you had, indeed,"
said Archie.
"You, too--you bid me go? Did I bid you go when you came to me? Did I
not tell you, sit down? Was I not polite? Did I send for a police? or
talk of lock-up-ouse to you? No. It is English that do these things;
only English."
Archie felt that it was incumbent on him to explain that his visit
to her house had been made under other circumstances,--that he had
brought money instead of seeking it; and had, in fact, gone to her
simply in the way of her own trade. He did begin some preliminaries
to this explanation; but as the servant was there, and as his brother
might come out from the dining-room,--and as also he was aware that
he could hardly tell the story much to his own advantage, he stopped
abruptly, and, looking piteously at Doodles, implored him to take the
lady away.
"Perhaps you wouldn't mind just seeing her into Mount Street," said
Archie.
"Who; I?" said Doodles, electrified.
"It is only just round the corner," said Archie.
"Yes, Captain Booddle, we will go," said Sophie. "This is a bad
house; and your Sir 'Oo,--I do not like him at all. Lock-up, indeed!
I tell you he shall very soon be locked up himself. There is what you
call Davy's locker. I know;--yes."
Doodles also trembled when he heard this anathema, and thought once
more of the character of Jack Stuart and his yacht.
"Pray go with her," said Archie.
"But I had come to see you off."
"Never mind," said Archie. "He is in such a taking, you know. God
bless you, old fellow; good-by! I'll write and tell you what fish we
get, and mind you tell me what Turriper does for the Bedfordshire.
Good-by, Madame Gordeloup--good-by."
There was no escape for him, so Doodles put on his hat and prepared
to walk away to Mount Street with the Spy under his arm,--the Spy
as to whose avocations, over and beyond those of her diplomatic
profession, he had such strong suspicions! He felt inclined to be
angry with his friend, but the circumstances of his parting hardly
admitted of any expression of anger.
"Good-by, Clavvy," he said. "Yes; I'll write; that is, if I've got
anything to say."
"Take care of yourself, captain," said Sophie.
"All right," said Archie.
"Mind you come and see me when you come back," said Sophie.
"Of course I will," said Archie.
"And we'll make that all right for you yet. Gentlemen, when they have
so much to gain, shouldn't take a No too easy. You come with your
handy glove, and we'll see about it again." Then Sophie walked off
leaning upon the arm of Captain Boodle, and Archie stood at the door
watching them till they turned out of sight round the corner of the
square. At last he saw them no more, and then he returned to his
brother.
And as we shall see Doodles no more,--or almost no more,--we will now
bid him adieu civilly. The pair were not ill-matched, though the lady
perhaps had some advantage in acuteness, given to her no doubt by the
experience of a longer life. Doodles, as he walked along two sides
of the square with the fair burden on his arm, felt himself to be
in some sort proud of his position, though it was one from which he
would not have been sorry to escape, had escape been possible. A
remarkable phenomenon was the Spy, and to have walked round Berkeley
Square with such a woman leaning on his arm, might in coming years be
an event to remember with satisfaction. In the meantime he did not
say much to her, and did not quite understand all that she said to
him. At last he came to the door which he well remembered, and then
he paused. He did not escape even then. After a while the door was
opened, and those who were passing might have seen Captain Boodle,
slowly and with hesitating steps, enter the narrow passage before the
lady. Then Sophie followed, and closed the door behind her. As far as
this story goes, what took place at that interview cannot be known.
Let us bid farewell to Doodles, and wish him a happy escape.
"How did you come to know that woman?" said Hugh to his brother, as
soon as Archie was in the dining-room.
"She was a friend of Julia's," said Archie.
"You haven't given her money?" Hugh asked.
"O dear, no," said Archie.
Immediately after that they got into their cab; the things were
pitched on the top; and,--for a while,--we may bid adieu to them
also.